And this is it. The end of Project: Karezi.

It's been a long, poorly written journey, guys, and I really couldn't do it without your support.

So thank you.

Every single one of you.

Even if you're reading this 3000 years in the future for your class in ancient human languages and you have literally no idea what a Karezi is, then thank you.

I don't own Homestuck.

CG: 'THERE ARE HEAPS OF ALTERNATE YOUS IN THE DREAM BUBBLES'.
CG: YOU REALLY SAID THAT DIDN'T YOU?
TG: oh man come on dude as if i dont get enough shit from rose
TG: god damn
CG: I THINK YOU NEED TO WRITE A FUCKING BOOK,
CG: 'HOW TO OFFEND A GIRL IN TEN WORDS OR LESS'.
TG: did you just fucking quote the swan princess
CG: DOES IT FUCKING MATTER WHAT I DID?
CG: THE POINT IS,
CG: YOU FUCKED UP.
TG: karkat i really dont need you to tell me this shit
TG: man ive broken her heart and it fucking sucks
TG: i always told myself i wouldnt blow it with her
TG: women like jade dont come around often
TG: actually no fuck that women like jade come around never
TG: and for her to love a loser like me?
TG: that was fucking near impossible man
CG: WOW, SHIT DUDE.
CG: WHAT THE FUCK.
TG: what
CG: ITS JUST...
CG: I LITERALLY HAD THIS EXACT SAME CONVERSATION WITH KANAYA A SWEEP AGO.
CG: HOW IRONIC.
TG: yes but do you know what the difference is?
CG: WHAT?
TG: jade isnt as fucking insane as terezi
TG: i dont think shell give me a second chance

"John, calm down, seriously."

"You broke up with him!? WHY!?"

"You're making a really huge deal out of this."

You throw your head towards the sky and let out a scream of rage, before violently throwing your remote at the TV, making it fall over backwards.

"John, what the hell, that was the best part!"

"I DO NOT CARE ABOUT GHOST BUSTERS AND ALL OF IT'S GOOD PARTS, JADE, I WANT YOU TO STOP DATING STRIDERS!"

"John, stop freaking out."

"BUT WHY SHOULD I? WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO BREAK DIRK AND ROXY AWAY FROM EACH OTHER SO THAT YOU CAN COMPLETE THE STRIDER CIRCLE!?"

"John..."

"WHAT!?"

"That was really mean."

You sit down, sighing into your hands, "Sorry, Jade, I'm just... angry. Are you sure you're okay?" Your sister sort of just pulls her legs up to her chest and nods.

"Of course I am, John, really. I'll talk to Dave later today and we'll figure it out, I'm sure. Even if we're not together any more I'm positive we'll stay friends."

"Okay then..."

The two of you sit in silence for a stretch of time, then Jade turns to you, "So can you, like, pick the TV up again, or what?"

"Hey, Karkat!"

"Hey, Terezi."

She's acting like she used to, back during the session. You can see this in the way her blue eyes are lit with the kind of determined craziness that they used to have. She runs up to you and lands on you, hugging you close.

You stop yourself from groaning aloud.

She's not actually this clingy, you think, she just knows it pisses you the fuck off.

So of course you return the hug, one-upping her instead of complaining. She takes this as a good sign and steps back with this wicked beautiful grin on her face.

"What's up? You seem a bit down." She asks.

You look at her, wondering if she knows, "Uh... Dave and Jade? They kind of had this fight last week and last night she broke up with him, Terezi."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah!? What the fuck do you mean by 'YEAH'!? They're the reason we're together, Terezi, not to mention the fact that Dave's the best friend I've got. It fucking sucks."

Terezi shrugs, "So we just do a little relationship advice reacharound. I'll talk to Jade and you can talk to Dave and we'll get 'em back together again. Our debt to them will be repaid and you'll be able to sleep at night again."

That's actually a really good idea, you think. Fucking Terezi and her Seer-y logic.

"Ok, well... I guess that wouldn't be bad?"

"Radical!" You blink at Terezi, wondering if she picked that word up from her dancestor, "I guess Project DaveJade is a go!"

"No fucking way, dude. I'm not doing that to her, she made her decision and I'm gonna respect that."

"Fuck you, Dave; you're coming to the goddamned dinner."

You groan, looking at the suit that's laid out across your bed. It's a nice suit, you must admit. For someone coming from a culture that thought fashion was stupid, Karkat's got good taste.

"Kanaya made the suit, by the way."

A good taste in moirails, that is.

"Ugh, ok, well who else will be there?"

"Just Terezi and I. Rose thought it best to stay out of this one. Also I think John's gonna try to tag along but if he does I'll just sort of shoo him away, don't worry."

You let out a long, suffering sigh that you know pisses Karkat off, "Fiiiinnnnnnneeeeeeeee. But only if she wants to."

"Sure! I kind of thought it was a bad idea breaking up with him."

"Wait, what?"

You shrug at Terezi, "I mean, if Dave isn't angry at me, I'd love to come along!"

"But I haven't even shown you the lovely dress Rose made just for you." Terezi pulls a lovely black dress out from her sylladex and giggle.

"Well, now I just want to go even more."

"Uhmm... I think I'll have a medium st-"

You interrupt Jade immediately, "She'll have the pasta all'arrabbiata, thank you... And the asshole in the glasses would like pesce all'acqua pazza"

Terezi is in hysterics next to your incorrect pronunciations, but you really don't give a fuck.

"Karkat, what the shit, dude?" Dave frowns at you, "Let the lady order for herself."

You shrug, "I thought you guys loved those meals last time you came here. You know, the whole 'it actually means something like angry pasta and crazy water' thing was kind of awesome."

Dave and Jade look at each other, before turning to you. You think you might've fucked up a little, forcing their cute habits onto each other, but then you realise you don't give a shit, as long as they manage to at least realise their feelings before the end of the day.

"And we'll share a large meatlover's pizza with extra barbeque sauce, thank you."

The waiter looks at all of you, before writing down your orders with a confused expression on his face. He leaves and you start talking to Terezi, deciding to let Dave and Jade do their own thing.

"You look beautiful, by the way." You look up as the really awkward silence is broken.

"Oh, uh... Thanks Dave" You clear your throat and take a drink.

"Listen, Jade... I'm sorry. I sort of realised how sucky I felt when I realised you'd dated Davesprite and not me and it sort of... yeah, it really sucked. I was being selfish and stupid, and I promise you, if I ever screw up enough to let anything happen to you, then I would be torn up about it for at least 50 years."

You giggle, "Then what would you do?"

"Well, I'd forge a sword made from tears and memories and hunt down whatever ended you and exact my vicious revenge before moving to the mountaintops and living there for the rest of my days. Maybe I'll bring the Mayor along and there I'll become the sad homeless guy in can town that has a mysterious and depressing backstory."

"And what if I was killed by something like drowning." You notice that Karkat and Terezi have stopped their conversation to listen to Dave's apology. Karkat has this smug little grin on his face.

"Then I will kill the ocean."

"Dave, you can't-"

"I'll kill. The. Ocean. And then we will all die from thirst and I'll be able to finally reunite with you in the dream bubbles. Wait fuck. Wouldn't... wouldn't using John's ring in the first place be the most logical idea? Fuck, why didn't I think of that? Ok I guess the whole mountaintop Can Town idea can be my backup plan for if you double-die in the dream bubbles."

Jade smiles and puts her hand into yours, "Well thank you, Dave. That was the second best apology anyone's ever given me."

"So yeah, now we've found Jadesprite and Latula seems to have gone missing. I kind of think the worst has happened to her... Feferi's being brought back and I think Sollux is kind of really excited to be her matesprit again. I thought there was a thing between him and Aradia but apparently they're just moirails? Also..."

You start to zone out a little as Jade continues to tell stories about her last week in the dream bubbles. You kind of really hated your crazy water shit, so Jade swapped it with the angry pasta and now you're both happy. Karkat and Terezi have gone back to their usual conversation and it seems to really sink in that you actually got those two losers together. You catch Karkat's eyes and he winks at you, then points to himself and mouths 'Hitch'.

You kick him really hard in the shin, and then turn back to your un-ex-girlfriend.

Things are starting to finally look up again.

I undid the break up because I can't stand to do that to DaveJade :)

Also wow I tried that crazy water shit yesterday. That food is quite bad.

Thank you all for reading this :)