Rachel plays with fire.

The Funeral.

It was raining, months later, at the cemetery, but no one really noticed as they were lost in the solemness of the funeral as Holly was finally laid to rest beneath the ground. Clad in black, Rachel stood next to her sister, holding Alison as she cried her heart out, surrounded by her family and friends who were no better than she was. Rachel herself was crying to show she was as saddened by her nieces's death as her mother was; by habit Rachel avoided showing her tears to others as she thought it was a sign of weakness, but when she'd broken down in front of everyone in the office after they'd seen the DVD Gill had reassured her when Rachel had stayed at her place that it showed the kind of person Rachel really was. Rachel hadn't been sure how to take that at the time, but now she didn't care with Alison in her arms, her brother in law, and their surviving kids and her own guilt and pain for losing Holly...It was too much for her not to cry. She didn't care how she was seen at the moment as she was lost to her grief.

To her side Janet had her hand on her shoulder, giving her strength, something to be grateful for but Rachel kept an eye on her sister's kids. Alison had become, if anything, more terrified because of Holly's death, of something similar happening to her remaining children, and considering her own sister, who was a police officer, and had personally investigated the murder and the trafficking of girls in Holly's age group had ended up in hospital. It had taken Rachel quite a long time to get out of hospital; she had needed to rebuild her strength and relearn how to walk again after the muscles in her legs had atrophied since her head wound had been the top priority to heal, but Alison was patient. Rachel had wanted to be here, to be there for her when they finally buried Holly, but Alison had wanted her sister to take her time getting better so then she could attend the funeral, not that Rachel hadn't wanted to, seeing as Holly had meant more to her than their alcoholic piece of shit of a father. She had help from that quarter to help push Rachel out of the idea she was going to get better like that, and she was almost jealous of her sister's friends.

Janet and her girls had helped Rachel get her legs back and she'd been there as Rachel's big sister, helping her with her balance like a baby being supported by its parents as it walked for the first time, but they had made sure she'd taken it easy though Rachel was stubborn, but even she'd found it hard to push her physical problems like she would've done had she been attending the gym, or jogging. She couldn't exactly push herself with an injured leg, but luckily her head pains had healed up nicely. Gill Murray and Julie Dodson had also helped her Rachel, and for that Alison was going to be eternally grateful, and Julie had quickly become friendly with Rachel; in fact, Gill and Janet had noticed how similar the two women were. It was scarily remarkable; both driven, ambitious, both drank more than they should, and both were exceptional detectives. Janet and Gill had lost count of the number of times they'd walked in to find Julie and Rachel argue about this and that about a case.

Rachel shook herself, her eyes were so fogged with tears that she almost didn't see the coffin being lowered into the hole. This was a nightmare, one Alison had been having for months since Holly had been murdered by Andy Roper, but she hadn't blamed Janet or Gill when they'd told her when she'd shouted at them, demanding to know why Andy, a respected police officer would suddenly turn to crime like he had, and suddenly resort to murder.

Rachel had told her some bits about her teammates and that included Janet and Andy's relationship, and when she had met Janet she had been impressed with her because the older woman was certainly a good partner for her sometimes wayward sibling. When Janet had sat down by Rachel's bed she'd told her friends exactly what Andy had said, and everyone had watched as Janet, usually a rational and calm woman, almost lost her temper as she recounted what Andy had said about doing what he'd done for her. Alison had known Janet long enough to realise she didn't want money, she didn't want a big mansion to live in. All she wanted was for the people she loved to be safe and happy, and that was a very short list; her daughters and mother being at the top, followed by her friends in the syndicate, Gill and Julie, and Sammy. Rachel and Alison had found themselves under that list too, something that made them happy.

Another person would've blamed Janet for being the unwitting cause of this horror, and Alison herself might have done if she hadn't already gotten to know Janet. For herself Janet seemed to be nervous as she often glanced into Alison's direction, awaiting Holly's mother's rage, but she hadn't lashed out at Janet. Alison had hugged her and told her it wasn't her fault. Janet had been so surprised, it would've been comical. Even Taisie and Elise had been nervous.

She didn't even blame Gill Murray, whose own DS had committed the murder and attempted murder on her own daughter and sister. As far as she was concerned it wasn't anyone's fault barring Andy's.

Her sister was doing her best not to break down crying, but it didn't matter to Rachel though she hoped she didn't. If Alison broke down then there was the chance that Rachel would follow suit, and she had her own problems to worry about, as she proved when she winced. She still felt a bit sore in the legs, but the hospital had let her go since she'd recovered quickly enough though she would need to have a checkup.

She was still recovering from the gunshot wounds Andy had inflicted on her, but those where physical injuries, and for Rachel they were stubbornly ignored, but her mind and body had retaliated in favor of emotional pain. Emotional pain was far harder to ignore, but Rachel didn't want to ignore it and even if she could she wouldn't. Everything in the cemetery reminded her of her niece's death, everything; the people clustered around the freshly dug hole with its newly erected gravestone dressed in black, holding Alison in her arms to steady and to reassure her though Alison's husband was on the other side, hugging his wife whilst crying himself, to their kids with tears trickling down their faces as their father and mother did their best to comfort them, to give them strength even if they couldn't find it in themselves to be strong to themselves, her colleagues from the syndicate, looking decidedly grim, including Kevin who was actually on his best behavior - he might have been a knobhead at times, but Kevin towed the line to fucking about at a funeral. The rest of the syndicate had brought with them flowers, and quiet words to Alison to say how sorry they were, hollow as they were, but they'd been appreciated so far.

Janet and the girls were there too, and surprisingly so was Dorothy, because it indirectly and directly affected them; Janet because Andy had allegedly done all this for her even if everyone who knew Janet Scott would realise she would not be bought by things like money or expensive clothes or cars, and the girls because Andy's men might have decided to take the law into their own hands - no pun intended - and turned them into prostitutes as well; a point that had been made to the other parents when it had been revealed why Andy had done what he had. It still surprised Rachel that Andy would think he could buy Janet's love and affections and she would just go to him like that, and that of the girls as well when the money was made from the humiliation of girls around their age selling their bodies would've worked. What Andy had done was the antithesis of what Janet and the girls stood for.

The thought of the other unfortunate girls who'd lost their innocences and almost their childhoods made Rachel glance in their direction. The whole crowd of them stood on the other side, looking on grimly and silently though some of them were sobbing as quietly as they could. Rachel's heart clenched in sadness, anger, and pity for these girls and what they'd gone through; they'd thought they were safe at school until Andy's thugs had kidnapped them and forced them into prostitution. Their appearances made Rachel sick; most teenage girls prided themselves on their appearances, but these girls were wearing conservative clothes and they weren't wearing any makeup; to Rachel they appeared to have aged a few decades, and that made Rachel feel a hot fresh swoop of anger towards Andy, and she knew Janet felt the same way, only she felt guilty because this had been, admittedly for insane reasons, done for her own benefit. Their parents stood nearby, comforting their children whilst looking remorsefully down at the hole where Holly's coffin had been lowered. Their children had suffered horrors, and they looked it, and yet another girl close to their age had dug up the truth after seeing some of her own friends change. Their sorrow was evident, they had no one but this girl who'd died because she had tried to do what was right, something Rachel still found questionable. Lying barely conscious on that fucking hospital bed, Rachel had had nothing to do but think, and sometimes her thoughts would come back to what was so obvious.

Holly should have come to her, but her niece had stubbornly gone on ahead with no regard to her own safety to get to the , what had been the point in keeping it so secret no one had found out until she'd been murdered, and the whole mess had been exposed? She could admire Holly's guile, but Rachel was still furious with her niece for not using her common sense to come to her with what she'd found. It wasn't hard, but it had been Rachel's own fault for not bothering much with her own family. The blame was split both ways, even if Rachel had not made much effort to visit that hadn't meant Holly couldn't have called. Rachel frowned as she remembered seeing the DVD, and how she'd been blaming herself, hating herself for not actively taking an interest into Holly's life. Janet had told her it wasn't her fault, but Rachel still held onto the belief she was to blame for Holly's death.

She doubted she would or could ever get over that. Rachel wondered if she even wanted too.

The wake lasted for a couple of hours though no one wanted it to last longer but somehow it did. That was the problem with wakes, no one really wanted to be there but they were too polite not to say. That was what made this one all the more tragic. The only reason people were still hanging around, including the teenage girls, was so then they could remember the fact a girl had noticed something she shouldn't have done, and simply paid the price for it in the end.

It was being held at Alison's place where the familiar surroundings did their best to help Alison get over Holly's death. Rachel mingled with the crowd, she'd been thanked by some of the parents and even a few of the girls for what she'd done, and they'd asked if she was fully recovered. She lied when she said she was okay again; Godzilla had insisted on giving her leave to recover physically, and Rachel had taken it gladly. After everything that had happened she'd needed time to get away from the office, she also doubted she would get over the sight of Andy's own desk and chair. Apparently Gill was on the look out for a new sergeant, but so far she had to make do with Mitch as Janet said the job had been Andy's and it would be a reminder of what he'd done and his motivation for running a prostitution racket if she took over the DS role in the syndicate. Gill hadn't pushed her, it had been simply a suggestion. Dorothy, someone who was always trying to make her daughter rise higher than a DC, had surprisingly kept her gob shut. Rachel was grateful for that because it meant she had some empathy within her.

Dorothy's own relationship with Rachel was on neutral ground, and they'd become much closer.

" Penny for them?" Speak of the devil and she shall arrive. Rachel looked down at her feet for a second before she turned to face Dorothy.

" I was just thinking about everything that's happened," she replied solemnly with her eyes now locked on Alison, who was now speaking to some of the parents of the girls. " I hope these girl's parents stay in touch with Alison," she said changing the subject and casting a look at Dorothy. The older woman also sent a sad look Alison's way. " With Tony and the kids and me she'll get better soon, but with these people...she know she's not alone. She needs it more than anything. They know their children could've suffered worse than they had, but Holly paid the price for getting this mess out into the open."

" You can add my granddaughters and Janet to that list as well Rachel," Dorothy seemed hesitant before she added, " And me."

Rachel looked at her in surprise before she smiled. " Thanks Dorothy."

Dorothy smiled back before her face dropped into a frown. " What's wrong?" Rachel asked wondering what had made Dorothy frown.

" I'm worried," Dorothy whispered, " about the backlash against Janet. You saw the effect it had on her."

Rachel closed her eyes in hurt for her friend. Andy's trial had been held a month before Holly's funeral, and Rachel had still been in hospital but she'd testified thanks to a webcam. When he'd been questioned, Andy had told the entire room he'd done it because he loved Janet, something everyone from Gill to the girls had been terrified against. The courtroom had descended into chaos, people clamoring for Janet's blood, but Rachel had shut them up by whistling loudly before berating them all, saying that Taisie and Elise, Janet's own daughters could've ended up the same way as their own daughters, and Andy may not have learnt about it until it was too late. Rachel may have been injured, but somehow that hadn't mattered since she defended Janet, and gave the audience a run down on the woman who was her best friend, emphasising Andy hadn't really known her, that Janet would never have wanted people to suffer in her name.

Dorothy, who'd done her best to defend and protect her daughter, had been overwhelmed with the parents anger, and she'd been between them and Janet before Rachel intervened. Somehow a police officer who'd been hospitalised carried more weight, and this time Dorothy had been grateful rather than jealous. It had been humbling to watch everyone in the courtroom quieten down at the sight of this injured woman telling them Janet was as much a victim in this as the girls, and herself.

Glancing at Janet now you would say she was looking around herself cautiously, but Rachel would always watch her back. Dorothy would be forever grateful for that. Just like she was grateful to Rachel for sticking up for her daughter.
" I know," Rachel replied, " but lets not talk about it here, not today," she added in a whisper. " I don't want a fight, not with Ali in the state she's in at the moment."

Dorothy nodded in agreement as she watched Rachel look around herself in case someone had overheard them. She had to admire her foresight.

" How are you doing?" Dorothy asked moving the subject away from her own daughter's pain.

Rachel sighed. " I just wish some of this had never happened," she replied, leading Dorothy away in case Tony, or heaven's forbid, Alison overheard them talking. " I still wish Holly had come to me for help, if she'd done that this could've been taken care of with the right resources and she would still be alive.

" But I wish I'd actually spent more time with her, Dorothy. If I'd done that then," she trailed off and looked away guiltily. Rachel didn't care if Janet's mother became judgmental, she wanted to let it out. So it became a surprise for her when Dorothy gently put her hand on her shoulder, and when Rachel turned to look at her, it was like looking into an older looking version of Janet; her face and eyes were crinkled sympathetically. Rachel felt like crying at the emotions on Dorothy's face, and when the older woman spoke her voice was soft and lulling in its logic.

" You can blame yourself all you like, Rachel, but think about this; even if you had spent more time with Holly, whether she same to you or you to her, how much do you think she'd admit? I'm not saying she wouldn't have told you if she had met with you, but its hypothetical now. Yes, it might have stopped Holly from dying. It would've meant you weren't put into hospital with it being so personal, but you have to admit Holly's death was a catalyst. It brought down everything Andy's done."

" You make it sound like a bad superhero story," Rachel remarked. Dorothy gave her a dirty look which made Rachel look away. " Sorry," Rachel said sheepishly.

Dorothy ignored her. " We have no way of knowing just what would've happened if your niece had come to you, Rachel. We can imagine it happening, but it wouldn't be reality, but fantasy. A nice fantasy, but a fantasy nonetheless. Also, think of this, do you really think Holly would've told you even if she had met you?"

Rachel blinked in astonishment as Dorothy's words filtered into her brain. That hadn't occurred to her before, what would've happened if Holly had met her. No one had even thought about it, not even Janet or Gill, or even Julie, and they were like her, police officers. No one had even speculated the possible outcomes of Holly coming to her. That sort of thing never happened in a police investigation; the only thing that was looked at was facts.

To say Rachel had been delighted by the end of the wake was an understatement; Alison hadn't forced anyone to come. In fact she hadn't even wanted the wake, but Tony and Rachel had had a chat about it, and though they hadn't wanted the wake anymore than their sister/wife did they had to admit to themselves that the wake would be a great way for Alison, and everyone who'd known Holly, to get together and talk even if they hadn't known about each other.

Janet looked over at her friend as she drove Rachel home; she'd offered to drive Rachel to Alisons and then back to the flat where she lived. Rachel hadn't been in the mood to drive, so Janet had offered. Besides the blond DC had wanted to get a feel for how her sister in all but blood was feeling; Rachel had looked terrible during the funeral, barely able to hold on but she'd been acting strong for her sister's benefit, but she'd also been protective of Alison, and of her. Janet had been a nervous wreck all day; she remembered only too well the way Andy's trial had ended up and it was only Rachel who'd been in hospital that had stopped the parents from turning into a lynching mob. Janet felt guilty for that, possibly in the same category as Rachel did for not knowing what Holly had been going through until it had been too late for her to do anything. Janet knew full well, oh yes she did, that Rachel felt guilty about Holly's death, and she knew nothing she could say would make Rachel realise it.

In the back, Taisie, Elise, and Dorothy sat quietly, watching the two police women. Finally Elise couldn't take it any longer.

" Rachel?"

Rachel turned her neck. " What's up, love?"

Elise smiled at the endearment, but it disappeared to be replaced with concern. " Will your sister be okay?" She and Taisie were worried about how the funeral would affect Alison. Both of them liked Alison like they adored Rachel, and she was just so nice and kind, she didn't deserve any of this; losing her own daughter, and nearly losing her sister to someone the girls had known. Neither Elise nor Taisie had liked Andy, they'd tolerated him for their mother's sake. Finding out what he'd done, it had shocked them, but they'd known he'd had a thing for their mother but they were stunned by the lengths he'd been willing to go.

Rachel looked away though she was grateful for their empathy. Ordinarily Janet would've berated her daughters for even thinking of asking that question, but she was curious herself, and she didn't want to get into an argument with anyone, not after the hell they'd been through. She'd watched as her daughters had interacted with the girls Andy had taken and Janet had been scared that the girls would be on the receiving end of their anger like she'd been in court, but she was wrong when they'd spoken to Alison and had received a hug. Why would Alison have hugged them and welcomed them both into her home if the animal behind the whole thing had done it for their mother's benefit? After that things had become more friendlier for the Scotts.

" I dunno," Rachel whispered brokenly, and looked away. " I hope so, but I dunno." She faced forwards and the conversation was over before it had even started. Elise and Taisie were upset to see someone they admired and loved so broken, so hurt.

" Thanks for the lift," Rachel said gratefully as Janet and her stepped out of the car, Rachel wincing as aches in her legs made it difficult for her to stand.

" No problem," Janet smiled, though her smile was tinged with worry; she'd seen Rachel wincing, but she wouldn't say anything out of respect.

Rachel had reached the door but she turned around. " How are you doing Janet? All I've heard all day are questions about how me, Tony, and Ali are doing, but how are you coping?"

Janet sighed, and she loosened her stance. " After that trial, I felt ill. Don't get me wrong, I'm pleased you and Alison are still accepting of me, but the other parents," she shook her head with a sigh. " I thought, I honestly thought, some of them would've gone for me today. That's why I almost didn't come, but if I hadn't then it would be like being back at school, knowing if you had left the bullies would've won."

Rachel winced. Janet had been debating whether she should come to the funeral or not seeing as it had leaked Andy had kidnapped the girls for her benefit in the first place, but Rachel and Alison had put their foot down, and Alison had made a point of publicly hugging Janet in a genuine show of welcome and affection. The idea had been that if the other parents had seen Alison, the mother of the dead girl, hugging Janet to show they were friends it would give Janet a protection, though no one had told her that. Rachel had told Alison that Janet hated charity though she was okay with giving it to those she believed needed it, so they hadn't told her about it.

" I know," Rachel said before she admitted. " I wondered how you'd be looked at today. I was ready to march over to anyone who dared attack you and the girls, and Dorothy." Janet smirked at the last minute mention of her mother, but she said nothing about it. " But I'm glad that Alison made it clear to everyone that you're our friend."

Janet smiled and she embraced Rachel, wrapping her in a warm hug. " Will you be okay?"

Rachel sighed as Dorothy's words echoed in her mind. " Your mum told me that even if Holly had come to me, she might not have told me anything."

" I hate to say it Rach," Janet replied after a moment as she mulled over what her mum had told Rachel, " but she might have a point. I mean, you did say it yourself, Holly had the opportunity and the means to tell you what was going on, but she didn't. Instead she kept it all bottled up, and we didn't find out what was happening until you identified her body from that fucking photo."

Rachel hugged Janet tighter. " I dunno if I'll get over it. I know what your saying, Jan, but the guilt will still there." She felt the breath leave Janet in a silent sigh, and then she felt Janet nodding her head against her shoulder. " I know. I feel guilty, too." Only Janet's tight embrace stopped Rachel from pulling back so then she could look her friend straight in the eye. Janet started to explain. " What Andy did...He kept saying he'd done it for me, but he said nothing about the girls. When I interviewed him, I wanted to kill him myself, but at the end I wanted to throw up, the pictures of the girls...I just wanted to murder him."

" Yeah," Rachel replied, wondering to herself if Janet could've gotten away with justifiable homicide, but decided she wouldn't have done. The CPS would've sent her to prison and thrown away the key.

Janet pulled away, her eyes teary. " I'm sorry, Rachel. If I'd made it clear to Andy the one thing I'd wanted wasn't money-"

" I don't think it would've made a difference, Jan," Rachel interrupted. " Lets face it, Andy was twisted. He believed everything he'd done was for you, and he let that motivate him. Everyone who knows you knows you only want the people you love to be happy. Andy never understood that."

Janet nodded, biting her lip. " I don't think I loved him, looking back and knowing what he was really like."

" I think you're well shot of him," Rachel said without thinking before she winced as she rubbed her head, realising what she'd said. " I'm such a stupid cow for saying that."

Janet smirked at her but her eyes were soft with sympathy. " No, you're not. You just spoke without thinking properly. It's okay, honestly, and you're right about Andy. We're well off without him."

Rachel smiled. It disappeared a moment later when Janet asked her next question. " What Elise said in the car, do you think Alison will okay?"

Rachel closed her eyes. " I think she'll get better soon, but I doubt she'll let the kids go through something like that. She's frightened, they're all she's got left."

Janet understood how Alison felt.

Rachel carried on. " Alison...she's lost so much, she lost her chance of going to college because our delightful mother fucked off without a care in the world, and she had to look after me and our Dom, the least said about our dad the better. When she'd married Tony, I thought she was finally going to have some happiness. I watched her as she had her kids, and okay some of them were right brats, but she loved them. She'd learnt from experience growing up.

" Now she's lost Holly, and that old pain where she felt like nothing has come back. I doubt she'll ever get over that. I mean, would you?" Rachel asked Janet pointedly.

No, Janet would never have gotten over either Taisie or Elise dying before their time.

Rachel hugged Janet one last time, and waved at the car before going into her flat, and closing the door.

Janet stood there for a good few minutes, thinking. The night air was cold but she didn't notice the chill, she was too busy wrapped in her own thoughts to notice.

In her flat, Rachel felt too drained to sit up and watch telly, but her mind felt as active as ever. It didn't help that her body felt completely out of it; Rachel was pleased Gill had told her she could take some time off within reason. The way she felt at the moment, she doubted she could actually run a marathon. After slowly taking off her shoes and socks, and her jacket, Rachel decided to compromise with her mind and body, and simply make herself a nice cup of tea and watch only half an hours worth of television before she made herself ready for bed.

As she waited for the kettle to boil, Rachel couldn't help but think about what Elise had asked in the car. Alison had been hit so badly, she'd lost her daughter, so she was far from okay and everyone who'd attended the funeral would know it. Her mind went to those girls; they could help Alison see that Holly had died for a good reason, but they'd be a reminder to her death.

And what about Janet? Deep down, Rachel knew this whole thing had been made for her best friend's benefit, though some people might take the law into their own hands to hurt Janet; the outcry Andy had instigated in the trial was proof of that, though Rachel doubted the bastard had done it intentionally as he was so twisted he never realised what the consequences would be. How soon would it be before Janet felt safe again? How soon would it be before any of those girls felt even remotely safe after everything that had happened to them? Andy's crimes had been a black mark on the police force as a whole, not just on Gill Murray; the fact a DS had used his knowledge of police practice to hide what he'd been doing for so long...It made everyone wonder if the police could actually see anything beyond their ranks. Rachel grimaced as she thought about the massive inquest going on at the moment, but fortunately she wasn't involved just yet; she'd already given her piece, but she'd seen it on the faces of her friends in the syndicate; Julie, Gill, Janet, Mitch, Pete, and Lee...they all looked stressed as the inquest delved deeper and deeper into the workings of the police.

Rachel bit the inside of her mouth, wishing and trying once more to prove she wasn't dreaming. The tang of blood in her mouth was proof she wasn't dreaming, much to her bitter annoyance.

" Shit."