A/N: Alright so this is my first time writing a fanfic. There's going to be more than one chapter, I promise. Lemme know what you think and all of that jazz.

~Tuna

Sollux leaned back against the large computer chair. He had been up since midnight coding these stupid viruses. Really, they were useless. He doubted any of the hacking he had done would be approved by Karkat when he looked them over.

It had been like this all week. Karkat would pay him to come up with protection against some new kind of virus, or some hacking job, and once he did just that, he was forced to start all over again. He tried explaining to Karkat that hacking and coding was a very serious business that was not to be taken lightly.

Instead of receiving a somewhat understanding response like he'd hoped for, Karkat had simply shouted, "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK. I'M PAYING YOU FOR A FUCKING REASON."

In Sollux's opinion, Karkat was a total asshole.

The door to the office slammed open, revealing a very tired looking Karkat. His usual all-over-the-place hairstyle was even worse, sticking up in all directions today. His eyes were lined with bags from lack of sleep, and his face was pale.

He ambled into the room, simultaneously trying to balance coffee in one hand and paperwork in another. "Hey, Fuckass," Karkat greeted.

Sollux knew anyone who didn't know Karkat would be offended. They might even claim Karkat was harassing them. However, that was simply Karkat's personality. They were both office junkies in a software company, and were most likely going to stay that way for a while. They regularly insulted each other, fucked up the other's work, and gossiped about the other co-workers like two old women at bingo.

Sollux considered themselves pretty good friends. And, for Sollux, that was a lot. He hated almost everyone; just like Karkat.

"Hey, KK. You look terrible. Thtay up all night?" Sollux asked. His lisp slid out every time he voiced an 'S' sound, something he found kind of embarrassing. He never quite managed to correct it.

Karkat glared at Sollux as he raised a coffee mug to his lips. "Fucking Ampora kept me up all night. He says his fucking son is supposed to be interning here, learning the shitty ropes or whatever," Karkat growled, referring to their higher power, and boss.

If asked, Sollux couldn't tell someone the first name of his boss. He never met the guy, and never bothered trying to meet him. From what Karkat told him, Ampora was an asshole. Karkat most likely knew Ampora's real name, but he had this weird thing with calling everyone by their last name.

"Ampora hath a thon?" Sollux asked incredulously. He never lifted his eyes off the computer screen as he spoke. His hands continued flying across the keyboard almost effortlessly.

Karkat opened his mouth, most likely to cuss out the boss and his good-for-nothing son. However, he was cut short when the main door to the office flew open.

Sollux assumed this was his boss. He was tall and muscled, obviously not trying to be modest in any way from the tight suit he wore. His black hair was slicked back from his face in a mafia kind of style. His eyebrows arched over dark blue eyes that were framed with long black lashes. He screamed 'major asshole'.

Next to his boss stood an almost exact replica; only slightly smaller. The large difference between the two was the streak of bright purple in his slicked back hair. It stuck up partially, drawing the attention of anyone within a mile radius. His choice of clothes was rather odd. He wore black pants with blue pin stripes, and a black t shirt to match. Around his neck he wore a blue and black striped scarf; something Sollux found as an extremely odd accessory for the summer. His eyes were framed with thick black glasses and almost the exact same color as his father's. Sollux couldn't exactly tell what the color was from this far away, but he was sure he saw a hint of purple.

His boss pushed his replica forward into the office. "This is v-where you'll be v-working for the first couple o' months," he said. His voice sounded deep and gravelly, like the voice of a past smoker.

Karkat scowled at the two of them. "Months?" he asked loudly. "You didn't say he was going to be here that fucking long, Ampora."

Ampora looked over to Karkat with an un-amused expression. "You don't shouldn't even care, w-Vantas. Captor is going to be training him."

Sollux looked up at the sound of his name. This was definitely news to him; very bad news. "What?" he asked.

His boss sent him a stern look. "Yeah," he said shortly. "Chief here is into programmin'. It's nothin' interesting if you ask me."

Before Sollux could respond, Karkat had let out a snort of laughter. "What kind of name is Chief?" he snickered.

"I'm not Chief," Ampora's son snapped. "He calls evveryone that."

Sollux had to hide the smirk that slid across his face. The younger Ampora had a strange accent, just like his father. He was so full of it.

Karkat sent the young Ampora a skeptical look. "Oh really? Then what the fuck is your name," he asked.

The wannabe-hipster crossed his arms defensively. "I'm Eridan," he said proudly.

The boss waved a hand in the direction of the two office junkies. "Sollux Captor, and Karkat W-vantas," he introduced.

Sollux had to fight the urge to roll his eyes. This guy was definitely a joke. No way was his actual name Eridan. He probably changed it just to sound more important.

Ampora motioned Eridan over to the small area where Sollux sat. Eridan strode over to one of the plush red chairs and sat down. He had a very sassy walk to him; almost as if he were flaunting something he thought he had. His eyes roamed over the mess of papers on Sollux's desk. He scrunched his nose in disgust and crossed his legs in an extremely girly fashion.

Oh great he's gay, Sollux thought tiredly.

He didn't have any issues with homosexuality. His issues were with the stereotypical girly homosexuals; the ones that were clean freaks and bossy. Eridan Ampora seemed like the exact thing he hated.

"Do you evver clean?" Eridan asked.

Sollux was tempted to pretend he hadn't heard the pompous jerk and continue his coding. He tensed his shoulders and turned to face Eridan. "Thatth not my job," he grumbled. "We have cuthtodianth for cleaning."

Eridan smirked at the sound of Sollux's voice. He immediately picked up on the lisp from the programmer. "What?" he asked mockingly.

Sollux's hands clenched. He was not going to put up with a pompous jerk.

Ampora must have noticed the tension between the two. "Captor, just so you know, you'll be giv-wen a ten percent raise by taking him on," he added.

He didn't wait for Sollux to give a response. Ampora turned on his heel and strode out of the office with the same flaunting walk as his son. He disappeared behind the frost glass, most likely heading for the executive floor where he worked.

Sollux turned to Eridan, a tight smile stretched across his face. He was going to try and be nice, he decided. He was going to take on the asshole and show him how to code and program different softwares. He was going to try and be as civil as ever toward his boss's son.

And it most definitely wasn't for that oh-so-generous ten percent raise. At least that's what he kept telling himself.

Eridan didn't do much for the first few hours. He ignored most of Sollux's attempts at teaching him anything. He would brush off questions and any type of conversation. For an hour, Eridan sat there is his red chair, tapping his hands on the armrests of the chair.

Sollux had no problem tuning out the jerk. He zoned out as he coded, his mind getting lost in the labyrinth of symbols and letters.

Unfortunately, though, Karkat was unable to tune out the incessant noise. He yelled and shouted quite a few times at Eridan, even threatening to choke the guy with his own scarf. Eventually Karkat realized Eridan wasn't going to cut it out. He stood up abruptly and stomped out of the room, muttering something under his breath about lunch.

Sollux heard Eridan let out a loud sigh after the door had closed. He didn't suspect anything of it; Eridan had been making annoying sounds and sighing all morning long. He distantly heard Eridan's chair squeak, as if he had shifted positions.

"Howw old are you?"

Eridan's voice, dangerously close to Sollux's ear, made him leap about three feet in the air. He clamped a hand over his chest, his breath coming out in quick and short pants. He swore he almost had a heart attack.

"What the fuck ith wrong with you?" he breathed out angrily. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest from the fright he'd been given.

Eridan ignored him and sat back, but dragged his chair closer to Sollux. "Howw old?" he repeated.

"Twenty. Why do you care?" he asked skeptically. He had moved his hands back to the keyboard. He tried to calm himself down enough to resume typing again.

Glancing out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the wide smirk on Eridan's face. "What?" he asked, suddenly feeling uneasy.

Eridan leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. A triumphant look slid across his face. "I'm older than you," he declared.

Sollux scowled at him. He felt irritation quickly bubbling to the surface. "What doeth that have to do with anything?" he snapped. He turned back to his computer, his fingers smashing furiously onto the keyboard.

If anyone heard him typing, they'd think it was Karkat instead of him.

"So that mean I wwould top," Eridan said.

Sollux felt his hands freeze over the keyboard. He couldn't have heard that correctly. He glanced back at Eridan with a skeptical gaze. His red and blue glass-covered eyes met the dark purple ones.

"What?" was his clever response.

Eridan rolled his eyes. "I'm older, so I wwould top," he repeated.

"Top in what?"

"Whenever we fu-"

Eridan didn't have a chance to finish as Sollux slammed him in the face with his bumblebee paperweight. Eridan flew backwards, hands clamping onto his nose to ease the pain. His face was twisted in pain, his eyes clenched shut tightly.

"Fuck!" Eridan hissed.

He pulled his hands away from his face, observing his hands carefully. Fortunately for him, Sollux hadn't hit him hard enough to draw blood. However, there was definitely going to be a bruise. He glanced up at Sollux incredulously. "You just fuckin' hit me," he said.

Sollux crossed his arms amusedly. "Your obthervation thkills are great," he noted sarcastically.

Eridan grabbed a frozen water bottle from the blue mini fridge against the left wall and then returned to his seat. He pressed the makeshift ice-pack to his nose. He let out a hiss of pain as it made contact.

"Wwhy did you do that? It fucking hurts," he hissed.

Sollux couldn't believe this. "You were jutht talking about uth… um… doing thingth. Grothth," he stammered, trying to cover up his stuttering.

Eridan grinned at Sollux. "But I wwas telling the truth!" he objected. He set down the water bottle. "I wwould top."

When he wasn't given a response from the hacker, he continued. "Are you too shy to talk about that stuff?" he asked teasingly. "That's pretty fuckin' cute."

Sollux lifted his paperweight threateningly at Eridan. He caused Eridan to shrink back slightly at the sight of the menacing bumblebee. "I will uthe thith."

Eridan held up his hands in mock surrender. However, this was all Sollux needed to return back to his work. He was sure Eridan wouldn't try anything now; especially with his bruised nose.

His hands flew effortlessly over the keys, a distinct clicking and tapping resonating throughout the office. He felt his sporadic heart rate calm and his labored breathing even out. Coding was like his daily fix; he was addicted to it. It could solve any problem, get rid of any unwanted emotions.

He really was lucky to be getting paid for doing something he loved so much.

Just when Sollux thought he was about to pass into a complete trance and finish all of his work undisturbed, a groan of annoyance erupted from behind him. He glanced over his shoulder at the slumped figure in the desk chair with a scowl.

"Can you shut up?" he hissed. His fingers never ceased their tapping on the keys, magically knowing where to press and what to type.

Eridan flicked a few strands of his purple streak of hair out of his eyes. He leaned back in his desk chair, the frozen water bottle tossed carelessly beside him. "Wwhy are you always so cranky?" he teased.

"I'm not cranky," Sollux snapped. He glowered at Eridan threateningly. "I jutht can't thtand thtupid bratth that think they own the plathe," he added. His lisp had a tendency of worsening whenever he became frustrated.

Maybe he was taking a large leap of faith by insulting the boss's kid like that. However, if someone didn't put the twerp in his place, who would? In his mind, Sollux was doing a good deed to world.

Fighting viruses and saving the world from assholes, my specialty.

Instead of getting offended like Sollux had expected, Eridan simply smirked at him widely. "But I do owwn the place," he pointed out.

Sollux decided he wasn't going to bother that stupid comment with a response. He had work to be done. His work day was almost over, and he still had a lot of coding to finish if he wanted to get out of this hellhole by 6:30.

He resumed his typing. Within minutes he found himself drifting off into his own little world. That was one thing he could love about his work; no interruptions and freedom to daydream as much as he wanted. It wasn't a surprise he hated people. If liked people, he most definitely wouldn't have chosen a desk job.

It was around seven when he sat back in his chair with a tired expression. He felt as if he were about to collapse on the spot. He'd had nothing to eat since midnight, and had been working non-stop. Normally, he wouldn't be so bothered by the long work hours and lack of food. He usually forgot to eat even when he was home; often getting caught up with whatever he was doing on the computer. He would probably be extremely overweight if he remembered to eat, he thought amusedly.

He stood up from his desk, a loud crack resonating from his back. He glanced around his work station, wondering where the stupid brat was. He hadn't heard so much as one peep from the purple-haired man since Karkat returned from lunch break.

Low murmured voices could be heard down the hall. Sollux headed toward them curiously. He peered around the wall of his small cubicle and stopped as his eyes landed on the source of the two voices.

Karkat was leaning against the water cooler with his arms crossed. His signature glare was set onto his face and turned upwards toward the taller figure in front of him. The bags under his eyes were more prominent than they were this morning. "I don't understand why you don't just ask him out, fuckass," he snapped.

The figure in front of him tugged on the scarf, they're annoying voice following. "Howw am I supposed to do that?" Eridan flipped a strand of purple hair back and placed his hands on his hips.

Karkat opened his mouth to respond, with what Sollux assumed was another string of curse words involving "fuck", and fell short. His eyes looked past Eridan's shoulders and locked with Sollux's. He let out a huff of annoyance and shoved past the wannabe hipster. "Whatever, dumbass," he growled. "I'm going home to get some fucking sleep."

He snatched a red jacket off the back of his chair and stormed out through the office door. Sollux and Eridan were the only two left in the office now. Everyone normally headed home around 5:30.

Sollux made to turn around and leave, deciding he'd had enough of work for one day. He paused when Eridan's voice sounded over to him. "Hey, Sol," he called.

Sollux froze and looked over his shoulder toward him. "What?" he asked. He felt annoyance bubble up inside him. Even Karkat hadn't given him a nickname and they were pretty good friends. The wannabe hipster strode over him. He stopped in front of Sollux, a little too close for comfort.

It was the first time Sollux noticed how tall the guy actually was. Eridan had to be pushing on 6'5'', easily. It made him feel as he were no match with his own 5'10'' height. Sollux also hated himself for noticing how nice the other's eyes were. They were a beautiful purple color mixed with what seemed like a hint of blue. The eyes were framed with thick bambi lashes; and to top it all off, framed with thick hipster glasses.

He's actually kind of attractive, Sollux thought in awe.

It made him sick.

Realizing that he was attractive only gave Sollux the urge to punch Eridan even more.

Sollux peered up at Eridan with a look of distaste. He was trying to hide the fact that he had forgotten Eridan was speaking. "What did you jutht thay?" he asked.

Eridan paused mid-sentence. A frustrated sigh ripped through him. "You wweren't listening at all, wwere you?" he asked, annoyance plain on his face. He continued whenever he got no response from Sollux. "Wwell, I wwas just saying that I wwas wwondering if you wanted a ride home, an' maybe to go out to dinner?"

Sollux felt his jaw hit the floor in shock. He blinked at Eridan a few times, his brain still not quite registering what was happening.

Did the biggest asshole on earth just ask him to dinner? Him, of all people?

Sollux straightened himself up. He glared at Eridan and decided he wasn't failing some ridiculous test this asshole was putting onto him. He knew there was no way someone like Eridan would ask out an office junkie to dinner, and he most certainly knew that the asshole wasn't able to look past Goodwill jeans and Walmart t-shirts.

"Do you think I'm thome kind of idiot?" he hissed. "I can thee right through your thtupid gameth and I am not falling for it," he snapped. He turned on his heel and moved back into his cubicle. He quickly began packing up his belongings in a hurry to leave.

He was definitely ticked now. He was done dealing with Eridan, and he was insulted that he was being messed with. He'd put up with enough of that in highschool; he didn't need any of that now.

Lost in his thoughts, it took a moment for Sollux to realize an arm had snaked its way around his waist. The grip tightened and pulled his back against a hard flat surface that most likely belonged to the owner of the arm.

He glanced behind his shoulder and noticed the familiar striped blue scarf wrapped around his attacker's neck.

"So you think I'm playing wwith you, Sol?" Eridan's voice was low and quiet, taking on a whole different tone from his usual voice. His breath fanned over Sollux's ear and caused a shiver of pleasure to wrack through his body.

Damn his voice is sexy, he thought absently.

No shut up. It's sickening.

He smells good though.

Sollux squirmed in Eridan's grip. He didn't care how good the other smelled, or how attractive his voice sounded. This was Eridan, the boss's ungrateful spoiled brat, and a selfishly pompous asshole who thought he could boss other people around. No way would that ever change.

"Let go, aththhole," Sollux hissed. He yanked his shoulders forward and hoped it might loosen Eridan's grip, if only a little.

It didn't. Eridan tightened his hold around Sollux's waist and pulled him back against his chest. He leaned forward, his lips barely brushing Sollux's ear. "Not until you say yes," he murmured.

Sollux found it hard to think. He wasn't used to anything like this. He wasn't used to touching people in general. Usually, he avoided all contact with others. Sometimes he even ordered groceries online just to avoid having to exchange awful small talk at the supermarket.

Needless to say, Eridan was causing Sollux's thoughts and senses to go spiraling out of control.

"Yeth to what?" Sollux stammered out.

Eridan's chuckle reverberated from his chest and through Sollux. He liked seeing the hacker getting all flustered. It was actually kind of cute. "To goin' on a date wwith me."

Sollux felt his face heating up as Eridan's other arm wrapped around him. "No, aththhole. I thaid I wathnt falling for your thtupid gameth," he snapped.

Eridan trailed his hands a bit lower on Sollux's waist, pausing at the button of his jeans. "C'mon, Sol. I'm only askin' for dinner." He tilted his head upwards and grasped Sollux's earlobe between his teeth. "Maybe a little more."

Sollux couldn't form a coherent thought at this point. He knew he had to make a move, and quick, before he ended up getting fired. The majority of him knew this had to be some sort of test. Maybe Ampora was trying to see if worker's actually listened to the "No relationships in the workplace" rule.

That had to be it, he decided.

In one last desperate attempt at keeping his job, Sollux snatched up the bumblebee paper weight once more and slammed in into Eridan's face. This time he didn't pause to see if the wannabe was okay. He simply snatched up his belongings and scurried out of the office door, ignoring the loud string of curse words from behind him.

Within seconds, he found himself fumbling with his car keys to unlock the door to his old beat up car. He slid into the driver's seat and slammed the door behind him. A loud slam echoed through the empty garage.

As he started up the car, he paused. Sollux glanced down at his crotch and almost groaned in frustration. If he had waited any longer in there, he definitely would have been fired.

His pants were unzipped and unbuttoned, barely sitting on his waist.

That fucking asshole.