Artists are Mundane

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Rukia slams the door and lets herself into the changing room. She ignores the curious looks from her friends – she's sure they'll make her talk about this later – and focuses on their manager, who is looking calmly at her from her spot on the couch in the corner.

"You knew about this!" she bellows angrily, pointing at the orange-haired man walking in after her. He sends her friends a disarming, shy smile before bowing and apologising for the intrusion. Rukia can't care less; her anger isn't aimed at him at the moment. "You didn't care to tell me?!"

"He was at the hotel yesterday looking for you," Nanao explains, pushing the glasses up the bridge of her nose. "I only asked why."

"My brother told you about this arrangement, didn't he?" she accuses.

"He mentioned it in passing," their manager replies with an innocent shrug. "I didn't think he'd actually go through with it."

"Trust me when I say that I don't even want the job," Ichigo tells her sullenly from his spot against the wall. Rukia takes careful note of the way everyone is staring at him like he's the best damn thing that's ever walked on the planet. Fine, so he does sound really…

No, don't even go there.

"No way in hell I'd trust you with anything," she growls at him.

"Ne, ne, Rukia-chan, I think you should calm down for a bit…" Orihime says with what is meant to be a comforting smile. Rukia's annoyance wavers – slightly.

"This might actually be good for you, Kuchiki," Soi Fon sniffs as she puts on the rings in her braids, a hint of amusement in her tone. "You've finally got yourself a decent punching bag."

"And Bya-dono chose him, so he can't be that bad," Momo pipes in, using her own nickname for Byakuya whenever he isn't around. Rukia just cocks an eyebrow at all of them before finally budging.

In response, she heaves a long sigh. "Fine, we'll see how this goes." She shoots a glare at Ichigo. "But that doesn't mean I have to like it. For now, sit there and make yourself invisible."

xx

A few hours after the event, Ichigo was led to a nondescript recording studio. Upon arrival, he was told to sit down and wait for the recording to finish. It's a relief that Nanao had been the one to tell him this; Rukia had resorted to ignoring him completely, which is fine by him.

Ichigo looks nonplussed and takes a seat on the plush furniture. The other bodyguard, Renji Abarai, had gone out for coffee a few minutes ago, and this is one of those moments where he can merely sit on the couch and enjoy the silence. He doesn't want to seem like a dick, but the redhead really needed to pipe down a notch; he kept talking to Ichigo and asking about his fights and his training, and Ichigo has probably said 'it's nothing special' about ten times in twenty minutes. He isn't exaggerating when he says it, but Renji doesn't seem to get enough of it.

Not that Ichigo will ever admit, but he does respect what these people do. From what he's seen and what he's been told, the Gotei 13 – like any other decent musicians – work hard and play harder. They give it their all every single time they play; that much he's seen.

At least, what he's seen in the past five hours that they've been in the recording studio. As Ichigo looks at the group behind the glass, their music somehow…draws him in.

He's not ignorant, of course. He's heard about the Gotei and how easily they've climbed up the charts since they were discovered during their college days. He just didn't care for them; he's always preferred 90's rock.

But right now, his preferences are thrown out the window. Orihime's voice is admittedly very lovely, and Ichigo's heard that she has a three-octave range if she tries hard enough, which is very, very impressive (not that he knows what the difference is between them, but if he's told it's a good thing, then he won't argue). The instrumentalists won't be outshone, though. Each of them play wonderful notes—each as clear and entrancing as the voice that brings them to life.

Chigau deai no ato de chigau koi mo shita yo

Ima no ko to wa umaku itteru.

What he doesn't understand is why these girls are singing about heartbreak. They don't seem like the type to get into those kinds of situations. He's heard about their different flings and different scandals, in passing, from his sisters, but he's never cared before.

So why are you caring now? A little bastard on his shoulder whispers in his ear. Hell if he knows the answer.

"Amazing, right?" Renji asks, suddenly beside him. Ichigo flinches, and the man only grins at his reaction before handing him a coffee. "They don't stop getting better."

"How long have you been with them?" the orange-haired fighter asks, trying to strike a conversation away from the subject of anything concerning his past fights.

"A few months after they accepted the deal," he answers, leaning back on the couch. "It's weird…I always wanted to be a bodyguard for the Kuchiki, but I ended up being a bodyguard for just one, plus her friends. I don't mind, though."

"Why'd you want to guard the Kuchiki? Not that it's any of my business…"

"No, it's fine," Renji says, waving his last statement off. "Rukia and I were friends when we were kids, but we got separated when her sister found her. I guess I just always wanted to repay her for making my time in the system bearable."

"She was adopted?"

Renji nods affirmatively. "I thought you'd have seen that in her file."

At this, Ichigo frowns. "No, that detail wasn't there…I've only been given her daily schedule and the basic stuff."

"Ah…Kuchiki-sama must've wanted to omit that little fact." Renji shrugs his shoulders and sips his coffee like he doesn't care at all. "Eh, you might as well know. Rukia's only a Kuchiki because her sister married Byakuya, and then they spent years looking for her, because she was given away when she was a baby, y'know? Then her sister, Hisana, found her when she was about 7, I think."

Ichigo doesn't say anything, keeping his gaze on the ebony-haired midget behind the glass, playing her little, black heart out. After a while, he begins to sip on his coffee to help him think.

Who ever thought that the little demon would have such a melancholy childhood?

Not that he would know…or would ever want to know. He has to do guard duty on her for a few months, and that's the deal: nothing more, nothing less. He doesn't have to know her inside and out.

But…he can't deny that some part of him wants to.

She just has this air around her that drags people in kicking and screaming, and it pushes them away at the same time. No wonder she's called the Ice Queen, or that her role in the group is 'the enigma.' People want to know more about her, but she doesn't seem to give anything away.

Also, she's a bitch.

Yeah. The thought makes him sneer. She's a bitch, so why waste my time?

"She's not that bad as long as you don't insult her," Renji tells him, as if reading his train of thought. He blinks and finally turns towards the man, whose attention is on Rukia. There is a small smile playing on Renji's lips, bittersweet and nostalgic. "I have the bruised shins to prove it."

Ichigo snorts in response. "The little bitch probably can't reach any higher than that anyway."

Renji merely shrugs. "You get used to it, bro. It's how she shows that she likes you, see? She's not that good at expressing herself, that's all." The man pauses. "Oh, and she does kickboxing."

The new bodyguard almost chokes on his drink. "Kickboxing – whose stupid idea was it to get that demonic dwarf to do kickboxing, of all things?!"

During their conversation, however, they haven't noticed the band stop playing, calling for a very late lunch break. It just so happens that Rukia opened the door just as Ichigo said his sentence.

By the time he reaches his last word, he's gotten a new bump on the back of his head. "Ow, what the – why the hell would you hit me?!"

"Because you're a jerk!" she replies hotly.

"Bitch," he mutters under his breath, rubbing the sore spot with his free hand.

"What was that, you pussy-footing dick?" she growls, fists clenched.

Great – one day on the job and I'm already arguing with the boss.

When he steams and seethes in silence, she takes that as her victory and crosses her arms proudly in front of her chest. "Just what I thought." She pauses. "For the record, I take kickboxing because of assholes like you who think that short people like me can't defend ourselves."

"Being short is cute!" Momo says as she exits the recording booth. "Don't let it bother you, Rukia!"

"Yeah, Rukia-chan! You can always turn into a robot-bunny!" Orihime joins, in her usual happy manner. When everyone gives her a blank look, the question mark hanging above her head can't be any more visible. "What? You know, the robot-bunny from that movie…Sucker Punch!"

There is a mass exclamation of "oh", and Orihime sighs. "No one watches the good movies…"

"I'll watch it with you again if you want, Hime-chan," Rangiku says, draping her arm around the similarly buxom woman. "Momma will do anything for dear Hime-chan~"

"Papa does not allow it!" Soi Fon butts in, pushing the two of them apart before curling an arm around Orihime's waist. "Hime-chan would rather go with Papa to get food, ne?"

"This happens every day," Renji bemoans as he finishes the last dredges of his drink before throwing it expertly into the bin in the corner. He stands with a sigh as all five musicians begin bickering and teasing each other, ignoring the two men and the sputtering recording manager at the console. "C'mon, dude. Once these girls are hungry, they're like rabid dogs…"

"You callin' me a bitch, Abarai?!" Soi Fon hollers from the front of the jagged line of people they've made, somehow hearing Renji's comment.

"Of course not!" Renji replies sarcastically. This appeases Soi Fon somewhat and lets her go back to her friendly spat with 'Momma' Rangiku over their three 'children'. Renji mutters under his breath. "Little bitch."

For some reason, the whole exchange makes Ichigo smirk.

Just a bit.

Behind them, Hanataro Yamada gapes at the closed door. Then, he promptly drops his head into his hands resignedly with a groan. It's a wonder that they can even finish songs…

The defeated recording manager heaves a sigh and replays the last song that the band has played. He should really be used to it by now, but what never fails to amaze him is the fact that they don't even seem to try to be good – together, they just sound incredible. Maybe…that's why they've stuck together for so long, and why their fans believe in them.

He smiles slightly before doing his job; might as well clean up the sound while no one is around to bicker. He has a feeling that Rukia-dono and Kurosaki-san will start biting each other's heads off once they get back.

xx

A few days later, when Ichigo finally leaves her alone and goes to his appointed apartment at the floor below theirs, Rukia grabs the chance to go to the bathroom and think after a good, hot shower. It's a plus that everyone else is asleep at this time of the night (or so she hopes, anyway; sometimes, her band mates have an annoying habit of being nocturnal).

Rukia glares at her reflection on the mirror, wondering for the hundredth time that day why Ichigo said that really disturbing thing about her eyes the day before.

They're too expressive, he said. You're really failing at this ice-cold persona with those eyes.

She clenches the edge of the sink, her knuckles turning as white as the marble it's made of. She shouldn't be so bothered by such little comments, but for some reason, everything Ichigo says makes her want to punch him. Or kiss him. But the latter is a fleeting feeling – usually brought upon by his rarely insightful moments – so she always feels the former towards the man.

I will kill him, she seethes as she fights the urge to punch the mirror. I won't even feel sorry…nope, the bastard deserves it…

In the three days she's had him as a bodyguard, she's felt more uncomfortable and more irritable that she ever has before. She doesn't even feel safe with that gun strapped to his thigh – shouldn't he be hiding it…or something?

Well, Ichigo, bang-up job so far.

With an irritated sigh, she releases her death-grip on the sink and readjusts her towel.

It's a good thing they don't live together; she'll go crazy with him and four other girls in the apartment.

On TV and in magazines, they would refer to this place as their 'dorm'; although it's far from the truth.

A 'dorm' reminds her of the studio-sized room with a mini-kitchen, a mini-dining area, overflowing cabinets of clothes, and two beds cramped in a cramped space.

Therefore, by her definition, her home isn't a 'dorm' – it's the penthouse of the Seireitei Hotels.

Seireitei Hotels – a name known throughout the globe for impeccable service and expensive rooms; it's a hotel chain owned by her brother and the family, among many other things, including top-of-the-line restaurants and banks with as much security as Fort Knox. No one would expect anything less from the Kuchiki, who own half the businesses in Japan as of now.

Because she is the heir to this empire, her brother has provided her with the most expensive lodgings – for free. Ever since she finished college and abandoned her acquired master's degree in exchange for music, she's allowed her band mates to share in the space that had become terribly lonely.

Being a Kuchiki sometimes has its perks.

Besides, she agreed that her brother can buy her anything he deems necessary for the 'pride of the Kuchiki' so that he'll let her become a musician.

"Hey," Momo greets as she unceremoniously walks into the bathroom naked. Rukia squeaks in surprise and mortification. "What?"

"Momo, put some clothes on!" she hisses, trying to avert her gaze as she makes a grab for her toothbrush. "Just because we're the only ones here right now – wait, hey, why the hell are you walking around naked in the first place?!"

"Freedom," Momo replies as she adjusts the water temperature in the shower, her ass sticking out slightly in Rukia's direction. The guitarist gags, and to this, Momo laughs. "What, it's not like you haven't seen me naked before!"

Rukia's face flushes in embarrassment – she keeps telling her best friend that it was a one-time thing in high school during her rebellious years and god, Momo knew she couldn't hold her liquor properly back then!

She shudders at the memory that resurfaces. Rukia was the rebellious one in high school, sneaking out at night and playing gigs in clubs and getting the opportunity to grab a free drink or two whenever she could. However, Momo would always stop her from drinking too much.

It was during their graduation party where everything blew up in her face – she had challenged Momo and a few friends to a drinking game, which ended in an awkward situation where she and Momo woke up in their underwear. Together. In someone else's bed.

God only knows what they did. Rukia will never feel inclined to be curious about what transpired during what she would dub 'the dark hours'.

"That has nothing to do with this!" she retorts, sticking her toothbrush in her mouth. When Momo steps into the shower (finally), Rukia heaves another, longer sigh. "Jeez, would it kill you to just forget about it?"

"Dude, everyone thought we were dating, remember?" Momo asked, amusement clear in her tone. Rukia blushes madly yet again. She opens her mouth to answer back, but brushing her teeth prevents her from doing that. "You jumped on the first person you saw, which was…hey, remind me who that was again? Oh, right, me. Y'know, I should still sue you for rape."

"From what I heard, you enjoyed it," Rukia says as she finally finishes rinsing her mouth. "Not exactly rape when you dragged me into a room, either. Or so I've heard."

"We were both drunk; let's just leave it at that." She laughs at this – Momo can never out-sass Rukia. "Besides, nothing happened anyway. Speaking of getting laid, how's Kurosaki?"

"How does that equate into the conversation, exactly?"

"Because, nuh-duh, he's hot. If I were you, I'd tap that."

"But you're not me, and he is definitely not hot," Rukia points out smartly, making her way out. "Anyway, as fascinating as this conversation is, regarding the circumstances, I don't like being 'free' and hangin', so I'll leave you to your shower."

She promptly and loudly shuts the door behind her and suppresses a giggle when Momo curses her name up and down. As she makes her way down the hall, however, she finds herself thinking if Momo had been right in her assessment of Ichigo's qualities.

He always does wear the regulation black shirt that is probably a size too small for him, considering how his muscles are always on display. Does he even notice that everyone ogles at him? Or is he just used to being shirtless on the job, what with being a professional fighter?

And does he really have to wear those tight-fitting jeans all the time?

Perhaps the more appropriate question is: with all these clothes, how can anyone be sure he's not gay?

xx

Five hours of recording, and an estimated time of an hour of bickering with Ichigo (and each other) certainly did not do any of them wonders. Today, Nanao's been pressuring them more so than she has in the past, spouting off junk about how the company is demanding new material and how they have to have their songs ready before their next tour.

The end result? An exhausted and snippy Gotei who managed to cram Ichigo and Renji into a different vehicle while they have their 'free girl time'.

"I'm so tired," Rangiku complains as she hops into the van, being the last out of the five girls.

"My voice feels weird," Orihime bemoans, leaning on Soi Fon's shoulder, who in turn pats her head.

"My fingers are numb," Momo whines.

"My hands are pretty numb, too," Soi Fon adds in.

In the back of the van, sitting beside Momo, Rukia sighs. "You guys forgot your junk again, haven't you?"

The collective mutterings and murmurings are the answer to this. Rukia shakes her head and pulls her friends' extra 'supplies' from her backpack.

She's definitely not the eldest, but it's evident that she's probably as mature as one. Maybe the fates wanted to compensate for landing the group with Rangiku as the eldest; despite her naïve impulsiveness, Rukia can act maturely at the most opportune times. Without Nanao to boss all of them around, they've managed to look to Rukia to organise them somehow.

Silently, Rukia passes Soi Fon and Momo their heat packs, Orihime her lozenges, and Rangiku her energy drink (regrettably).

"Thank you, Rukia-chan," they say in tandem, mostly out of habit, before they continue on to relieve themselves of their physiological stress. A peaceful moment passes, but Rukia shouldn't have been surprised when it didn't last long.

"So," Rangiku starts again. "How's Ichigo?"

"It's been a week, and we either rip each other's heads off or not talk at all." Rukia answers, somewhat annoyed. She's tired of people trying to get her together with Ichigo. Besides, ever since the press saw Ichigo leading her towards the studio, small rumours have started to pop up, and the more time passes, the worse it gets. "What does that tell you?"

"That he's hot for you and, obviously, vice versa," Rangiku answers, grinning back in her usual catty manner. Man, that girl has the energy to power a nuclear reactor. Rukia groans at her response.

"You know that I'd rather cut his balls off, right?" she asks incredulously. "What is with everyone thinking that I'd do him?"

"Sexual tension!" they answer in unison.

She grumbles and crosses her arms in front of her chest, sulking. "I hate you guys."

"Ne, ne, Rukia-chan, don't sulk so much!" Orihime chirps, nudging her against the window. Rukia's frown lightens at this typical (cute) behaviour of their vocalist. Her friend sees this, and her smile widens. Then, she grabs a lock of her hair and puts it over her lip, before saying in a fake manly voice: "Look, I'm a guy! You can date me!"

"Rukia's not that easy, Hime-chan!" Soi Fon berates in front of them. The drummer shoots them a mischievous smirk. "You have to get her drunk first!"

"Papa Soi Fon! You know we never let our children drink!"

"Weirdo."

"Freak."

"LLAMA!"

"WHAT?!"

"I DON'T KNOW!"

Just like that, the tension dissipates, and teasing Rukia is traded for teasing each other.

She happily looks on. It's not that she feels out of place (she doesn't), but…sometimes, it's easier to just watch. It sounds creepy and weird, and Rukia knows that she would have joined in on the fun way back when, but now participating seems a little too tedious. God knows how much Rukia's been 'participating' these past two years, and she thinks she deserves a break from all of it.

"You okay?" Orihime asks, now the concerned friend once again. Rukia gives her half a smile.

"Yeah." Suddenly tired, she leans her head on Orihime's shoulder – something she hasn't done in a long while. "I'm fine."

She closes her eyes and thinks of a time when this moment wouldn't have existed. This – sitting in a van, knowing that she's adored in places she hasn't even been to. This…popularity thing…

She's had her fair share of it, of course. To those running in the classical music circles, they'd know her first as the genius, the prodigy. Maybe that's where she got her nom de guerre – "The Ice Princess." Maybe someone said something about before, when all she cared about was getting the notes right, playing the music perfectly. Screw the rest; they're all amateurs.

She played back then for her sister and for the brother-in-law who always has been (and always will be) cold towards her. She played to connect to people, but that didn't seem to happen, so she just…played like it would make a difference, even though she knew it wouldn't. Hell, she even forgot why she loved music in the first place. But she kept on going until she dug herself a hole that she thought she wouldn't be able to climb out of.

Then, she got out of it. For a good while, she stopped herself from grabbing a violin or sitting by a piano or some other instrument. She stopped doing what she did best.

Of course, it had been a challenge. She can't just switch it on and off. Her major in psychology had been touch-and-go for a while – she didn't really choose it because she was interested in it. Rather, it had been a burst of spontaneity. She saw Momo getting into a business course because it was expected of her, and Rukia merely did not want to fall into that pit. She wanted a change.

She got her wish, too. She enjoyed it for a while…before everything started to go downhill. Momo's surprise engagement, Momo's decline into partying and drinking and drugs during their college years…not that Rukia would ever complain about taking care of her friend, but Momo had been unstable back then. She needed a lot of help. It's a good thing that Rukia had met Soi Fon, Rangiku, and Orihime, because she doubts that she could have brought Momo back to being Momo all by herself.

They needed to…switch on. Do what they do best. Do something that brings them back to whatever semblance of sanity they had before.

Which, of course, brings them to now.

Rukia sometimes wonders if having all this fame has made them a little crazier. The stress, the pressure. Some of the members aren't used to it, but they'd learnt to adapt, in their own way. In fact, every one of them had to learn to be popular; the crowd isn't too fond of five weirdoes, who just happen to have a lot of talent. They had to build and maintain a certain image.

Orihime, who always comes off as happy and bubbly, was allowed to keep that persona. It attracted people to them, made them likable, "unique". Rock bands usually come off as intimidating and fierce, but Orihime's personality dispels that stereotype and makes them more approachable. More innocent, if there ever was such a thing.

Momo, who acts like Orihime when she first meets people, became Orihime No. 2. Rukia remembers Momo complaining about it for days when they had their first talk show, because Momo's always been the outgoing, sassy one who fights people with her words. Hell, the girl sasses people every chance she gets. The probability of her sassiness coming out is as high as her pigging out on the little junk food they're allowed to keep in their home. Reining that personality in made Momo sass people more than usual off-screen for a few days.

Then, Rangiku, who's stuck with the role of being their 'mother' because of a certain thing during one of their first TV shows. There was a show that they agreed to film – one that allowed their growing fan base to see how they're like at home. They saw Rangiku being the first one to get up and the only one to make breakfast (usually, it would be Momo or Orihime), and so the image stuck – Rangiku, the goddess who can play a mean guitar. The sex appeal of the group was boosted in that one (and only) episode.

That episode also gave Soi Fon the role of their 'father' after one instance where she (half-jokingly) threatened anyone who dared court her 'daughters.' Soi Fon is the sassy type as well. Most would consider Momo being similar to Orihime, when in fact the two 'trouble makers' in the group are Momo and Soi Fon. God, Rukia can't keep track of how many things those two have broken in their attempts to have 'some fun.' Anyway, their bad-ass image is kept by their drummer, so no one complains.

Rukia doesn't even remember when she was dubbed "The Ice Princess." Maybe because she would rather sit back and let the others do their thing on-screen. Her 'bored' and 'piercing' expression, coupled with her professional attitude, must be the cause of it. She finds it rather odd sometimes that she has fans because of a representation that isn't really her at all. They think that her cold demeanour towards others is her usual way of expressing herself when in fact, she'd much rather make bad jokes to break the ice, so to speak. Her band mates already do that, though, so she never finds any point to contribute to their bad humour.

So, it's their ragtag group of misfits that has managed to capture the hearts and ears and whatever-other-organs of their fans.

Rukia's thankful, in a way. At least, with four other members in the band, the spotlight isn't on her as much.

Wonder what Ichigo would think if he knew I hate acting.

The thought brings a small smile to her face before she finally drifts off to sleep. She'd rather take a nap than mentally whine about everything anyway. It's not like she'll actually say anything about it to anyone.

.

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A/N: In which Nanao is boss, Rukia and Momo are gay for each other when they're drunk, Rangiku, Soi Fon and Orihime make good comic relief, and Renji fangirls over Ichigo.

I'm sorry if the chapters are progressing slower than they have in the past, but that's because HEY, better quality writing is better than...not-good writing (I'm sorry I'm writing this at 2 in the f****** morning and I have no idea what I'm doing...and I have some event to attend in the city all day tomorrow..or technically, today. With people. UGHROSIGLGJFLGH - I'm gonna regret this tomorrow/today aren't I).

I shall never fail to thank my two wonderful betas, NieveDrop and Sami97. Thanks guys! I hope you're not too disappointed in my writing yet~

BUT on the plus side, the next chapter is already written, ready to be edited by moi, and then edited even more by the betas.