Tavros awoke in the familiar surroundings of a hospital room, bright light causing his eyes to burn for a moment as they adjusted. This time, instead of seeing his lover's smiling face, he looked over to see Karkat sobbing on his sister's shoulder, as she tried to share what little they had between them. He also noticed the distinct lack of Gamzee in the room, and this alarmed him. All that could play in his head was the windy afternoon that had landed him here.

"He is dead… We killed him…" Tears pricked his eyes as well, hoping that it wasn't true. That all of this had been a horrid dream, and that he was waking up after the surgery. Yes a month and a half was a long dream, but denial is a powerful thing.

"Where is Gamzee?" He squeaked out, and they turned to him, as if not even remembering that he was there.

"He's…in the hospital…" Karkat said, not meeting the boy's eyes.

"What do you mean? For an injury, or did you let them lock him away again?" Tavros stood, the IV pulling on his arm. He ripped it out, angry at the possibility that Karkat had let him be strapped down like a frog, ready for dissection.

"The Schizophrenia doesn't seem to be the problem, rather that we can't convince him that you aren't dead. Even showing him your vitals doesn't do anything but make him angry. He had to be sedated so that he wouldn't scratch out his own veins." Terezi explained, trying to keep it as light as one could put this. There were only so many ways to tell a teenager that his boyfriend was trying to kill himself because you had been in a coma.

"How long?" Tavros asked, seemingly angrier than before, looking around as if he thought there should be something there.

"About three weeks. Calm down, Tavros!" Karkat shouted, but the distressed teen refused.

"If there isn't a change of clothing in my hands in ten seconds, I'm going to see him in the hospital gown." Tavros demanded, holding out his hand and beginning the count. Terezi reached into her bag and produced a pair of jeans and a black long sleeved tee shirt. He put the pants on, and removed the gown, throwing the shirt on as he left the room, bracelet still around his wrist, and his shoulder throbbing where the injury remained. From not using the muscles, his legs would have been too weak to carry him had they been real. It was a perk to having mechanical legs. He followed the signs to the psych ward, where he asked for Gamzee's room.

"I'm sorry, this patient isn't allowed visitors due to violent behavior." The clerk said, looking at his strangely.

"What. Fucking. Room?" Tavros demanded, adrenaline making him not really care if he had just said the first curse word of his life.

"Fine, 205, but please allow me to call an escort, sir…"

"I don't need one. He won't hurt me." Tavros called back, already running to find the room. When he opened the door, he saw what appeared to be a torture chamber. Gamzee had a ball in his mouth, and was straining against leather straps.

No, he wasn't straining, he was simply rubbing his wrists against their rubber-coated interior, as if trying to create friction. Tearstains covered his face, and his hands had been placed in casts that prevented their movement. He could do nothing but writhe like a worm about to be placed upon the hook, and Tavros was appalled. He nearly puked at the sight; blood caked to Gamzee's chin and arms, as if no one had bothered to clean him up all this time.

"Oh God, Gamzee, look at me." Tavros said, running up to him, moving the head to stare at him as he started removing restraints.

"Why does my head torture me like this. Tav is dead! That fucking whore killed him!" Gamzee shouted, though he showed no signs of violence.

"No, Gamzee, I was hurt, but I'm alive. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you…" Tavros whispered, kissing his right hand as he took off the finger casts.

"You can't be Tav. The real Tav wouldn't have anything to do with a disgusting piece of shit like me. Tav can't be tainted by a murderer." Gamzee sobbed, though he stroked Tavros' face nonetheless.

"Then how are you touching me, Gamzee? I'm here because I love you, and not even death could keep me from telling you that one more time." Tavros said, clasping the larger hand on his face with his own.

"I've had stranger dreams. Dreams filled with more than just touching. They're always so real, but they never are…" Gamzee replied, his eyes still foggy.

"What happened to you Gamzee? What happened to miracles?"

"She took them away when she took Tav."

"But I'm Tavros. Gamzee listen to me!" He whined, and pouted. Suddenly, Gamzee's eyes cleared up, and a moment later he wrapped the smaller boy in a tight hug.

"I've yet to see anything, dream or fantasy, that can make that little face. It really is you." Gamzee whispered, rocking the boy back and forth.

"Out of everything, and you recognize my pout?" Tavros laughed a little.

"Why would you come back? You saw the monster that I am. I killed someone, Tav. I'm a murderer." Gamzee said, fresh tears following the tracks of countless others shed before.

"No. You aren't. Even if it really was you who had killed her, you were only protecting the people you care about. She had already shot two people, and was about to shoot more. She shot you!" Tavros tried to explain.

"Doesn't matter. I gave in to the monster. I handed him the key, without so much as a fight. It was my entire fault. I almost killed Karkat…the only reason I'm not dead now is you. I didn't want you to see another corpse, and I still don't."

"Then please, even if you can't see the beauty in you, trust me to know that it's there." Tavros said, placing a kiss to the shoulder that his head was resting on until Gamzee decided to let go.

"I suppose that'll have to work. I can't have you being sad." Gamzee conceded, frowning, but still nuzzling his boyfriend.

"Let's get you cleaned up, okay?" Tavros suggested, and Gamzee nodded, getting up and walking to the shower. Tavros stripped his shirt and pants off, leaving his boxers on. Gamzee, of course, had only the gown on, and had no choice but to leave him naked.

Tavros blushed, but started the water nonetheless. Gamzee had seen his lower half in boxers after the surgery, and there was really not a difference. Or at least that's what the boy told himself as his face turned a bright crimson he preceded to blame on the steam as he watched Gamzee bathe, so that he wouldn't do anything stupid while he was alone and unstrapped. Tavros was also showering himself, as he could feel it had been just as long since his last cleansing.

They were both rubbing shampoo through their hair when Karkat came in, and gave them a disgusted expression.

"Really… Of all times you two picked now?" He asked, Terezi walking in behind him.

"You never have kinky hospital shower sex with me." She pouted, and Tavros almost passed out with embarrassment.

"It isn't like that!" Gamzee protested, though usually he would have been the one simply sitting back and watching his partner blush.

"Uh-huh. Sure, Gamzee." Karkat said, covering his eyes. He had no desire to see either of them naked.

"Really, he was just covered in dirt, and I wanted to get him clean, and I needed to get clean too, and so we figured that we would shower together." Tavros explained, still mad at them for letting Gamzee go like that for so long.

"Yeah, I know kid. Just hurry up, so the doctor can see that Gamzee's okay." Karkat relented, sighing and walking out. He didn't want to have to look Gamzee in the eye, and see the pain that lingered there; the pain that he hadn't been able to prevent even though he was merely feet away.

"You know it's not your fault." Terezi told him, once they were out of earshot of the two children.

"Yeah, I guess. But it's hard not to blame myself, when I watched my brother die, and nearly watched both our kids follow him down." He said, staring at the cold, white linoleum.

"It'll be okay, Karkles. I promise, it'll get better." If anyone knew guilt by proximity, it was she, and she knew that while it never really went away, it did lessen with time.

"If you say so." He mumbled, burying his head in her shoulder until he heard the water shut off, needing to exhibit his usual cold, uncaring demeanor, lest someone think that he could actually be broken. He was the patriarch now, and in a way always had been, and he had to ensure that nothing happened on his watch.

The doctor decided that, while he may have some co-dependence and self-esteem issues to deal with, Gamzee was more or less cured of an incurable illness, and would pose no threat to anyone if he were let outside into the real world. The courts quickly decided that Gamzee was not guilty, since he had no real choice but to kill Vriska, lest she slaughter everyone present. Surprisingly, Equius started hanging out with them when school started again, and seemed to have no bitter feelings for his sister's death.

Soon, Christmas passed, and New Years swiftly after. And with the coldest of the Northern chill came the hottest of holidays, Valentines!

So short chapter is short. Sorry to keep you waiting and then give you this, but I've been sick as a dog, and it just wasn't working out. Next chapter is Valentines and smut, and then this will FINALLY BE OVER! Thanks to everyone who has read along so far!