A/N: OKAY FINE! This one is REALLY the last chapter! I mean it this time. I was looking through my old bookshelf of kids books, and I just couldn't not write this. I just... my heart. Here it is.
I do not own Rookie Blue, or any works of Robert Munsch.
EPILOGUE
"Okay munchkin, are you ready?" Andy asked three year-old Mackenzie who was wrapped up in a warm blanket on her mother's lap. The PJ-clad toddler scooted her butt a little, and leaned back against Andy's chest and Andy retrieved her giant book of Robert Munsch stories from the bedside table.
Mackenzie was about to spend her first night in the bigger bedroom that she'd been begging her parents for. It was their make-shift office, but they agreed that she was only going to keep getting bigger and accumulate more stuff, so they relented and allowed Mackenzie to decorate the room in a bright pink paint. The office took up over half of Sam's man cave, turned play room. And the old bedroom remained the nursery.
"What story do you want to read?" Andy asked her, on the table of contents page. Knowing which story her daughter would choose, still, they never skipped this part of story time. 'Moira's Birthday' was Kenzie's favourite story, and it caused her to giggle herself tired.
But then Mackenzie stuck her chubby little index finger on a different title, taking Andy totally by surprise. She smoothed a hand over her baby girls brown curls, and kissed her crown, quite happy to see a change in the lineup. Andy could recite 'Moira's Birthday' in her sleep...
"'Love You Forever' by Robert Munsch." Andy began, feeling Mackenzie's head nestle down right between her breasts. "A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang:
I'll love you forever I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living My baby you'll be."
Andy read the story at a steady pace, in a soft, nurturing voice, trying to sway her daughter to a land of dreams, but Mackenzie didn't drift. They reached the last page, and Mackenzie's finger followed Andy's on the page as she pronounced each syllable, unconsciously teaching her to read along. She remembered hearing the front door open a while ago, clearly Sam was home, but thought nothing of it until they reached the last line of the story.
"I'll love you forever I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living My baby you'll be." Sam said the last line from the door jamb, in time with Andy, and Mackenzie squirmed in Andy's lap, happy that her daddy was home.
Taser made his way into the room where the family had congregated, and slept contently at Mackenzie's bedroom door, ready for any threats.
Mackenzie threw off the blanket, and scrambled out of bed to where Sam stood, and he picked her up in a big hug, peppering little kisses all over her face. She squealed at the big fat kisses and tickles he bestowed on her, and Andy sighed, hating that Sam was getting her all worked up. But it's not like she'd been sleepy anyhow...
"I'm sorry I missed story time." He mumbled, nose to nose with his daughter.
"Thas otay." She mumbled tiredly in response. Kenzie had trouble with certain hard consonances.
"Maybe one more, since it is the first night in the big girl room?" Andy suggested, knowing that Mackenzie would be scared tonight if they left her awake.
They both expected their little girl to be ecstatic and begin demanding the next story, but she sighed, heavily, and rested her head on Sam's shoulder, lip quivering.
"Baby, what's wrong?" Andy asked worriedly, the minute she saw the pout. Sam sat down next to her on the bed, and Mackenzie pulled out of his embrace, and flung herself at Andy, causing her to fall backward toward the pillows. Her face was buried in Andy's neck, and she could feel the tears before they heard them. "Shh. It's okay, mama's here." Andy soothed, hoping she could calm down enough to tell them what was wrong.
Sam rubbed up and down her back with his large hand, and he wore an equally worried expression. It wasn't like Mackenzie to go off like this. Sure, when she fell down, when she watched the Lion King, when one of her toys was taken away, but not just out of the blue.
Her sniffles started to go away, and her breathing had slowed enough that she could choke out certain words.
"Pro... mise?" She hiccupped pulling away from Andy's hug.
"Promise what? Shh, sweetie you need to calm down. Everything is alright." Andy cooed.
Sam moved off of the bed and slipped out of the room to get her a cup of water, and by the time he came back, the tear tracks on her cheeks were dry, and she was much calmer. He handed Mackenzie the small pink cup, and she sipped the water until the cup was empty.
"Kenz, what's wrong?" Andy tried again.
"When the baby is here, you won't forgets me?" She asked, with so much hope behind her little voice.
Andy finally understood what was going on. The big room (further away from their room), the story, she was afraid of being forgotten. That the baby is replacing her.
They'd only found out that Andy was pregnant two months ago, and thought they should definitely wait to tell Mackenzie until the first trimester was over, and they were mostly safe. They told her yesterday when Sam got home from work, and she was thrilled! Her four year old friend from daycare, Casey, had a little brother and Mackenzie couldn't wait to tell her she'd be a big sister too. Clearly something Casey had said today got Mackenzie very worried.
Sam and Andy exchanged a look of realization and sadness, upset with themselves that they hadn't taken more time to discuss it with her.
"Of course not! Mackenzie, daddy and I love you so so so much. And nothing on this earth would ever make us forget about you." Andy reassured her, looking back to Sam to see if he had anything to add.
"Kenzie, we thought you were excited to meet baby." He said simply, hoping she could express where the anxiety came from.
"Casey says-" 'Here we go' Andy thought to herself. "that babies take all mommy's time. She said babies can't do anything alone, and mommy's and daddy's have to spend all the time with the babies."
They were shocked that it wasn't actually an irrational thing that Casey had said. It was, to an extent true, babies can't do much on their own. A lot of their time would be spent helping the baby, but certainly not all of it, and they definitely wouldn't neglect Mackenzie. It would be hard to find the balance of spending time with Mackenzie at first, but it was certainly attainable. Families do it every day.
"Well, babies can't do much without help, that's true. But, that's why you have a mommy, and a daddy." Sam attempted, trying to bring a silver lining. Of course, Sam would be at work most of the time...
Andy decided she had a better perspective to offer the inconsolable girl.
"Do you know what new babies do most of the time Kenzie?"
She waited for Mackenzie to shake her head no so she knew that she was fully invested in the conversation.
"Babies sleep, eat, and poop." She said, matter of factly, getting a giggle for using the word poop. "They sleep a lot! And guess what you and I are going to get to do while baby sleeps. We are going to bake cookies, and watch movies, and read books..."
Andy knew that this was all starting to appeal to Mackenzie, when her dimples got deeper and deeper while her smile spread. For every activity Andy listed, Sam tickled her for good measure, turning her mood around in no time.
Of course they knew this was going to come up again when the baby was actually born, but for now, they just wanted to keep Mackenzie positive. And more than anything, they wanted her to know that she was loved, and always would be.
"Otay." She said at last, really accepting that her parents wouldn't just leave her someday. Mackenzie re-positioned herself in front of Andy's belly, and kissed her belly button. "I love you baby. I love you fo-evor, I like you for a-ways, as long as I living, my baby you be."
Andy stared at Sam, and he could tell that Andy really just wanted to cry at the affection, and the tenderness of the moment. He grabbed Mackenzie's sides from behind her, forcing another squeal of delight out of her, and offering Andy a moment to collect herself again.
When the tickle fest finally stopped, the second bed time story was read, and Mackenzie passed out half way through 'Moira's Birthday'.
It wasn't until they had retired for bed and were finally getting comfortable that the subject was broached again. Sam had just gotten into bed on his side, and Andy had just finished reviewing some court notes. Once he's settled in, he goes straight for her jugular and the court notes are tossed to the side. But in a moment where there was no work, or children to distract her thoughts, she let herself go back to that moment in her daughters room where she needed the assurance that she'd always be loved.
"Do you think I've ever given her any reason to-"
"No! Don't. I know where you're going with this Andy." Sam said sharply, detaching himself from her neck and looking right at her. "This was brought on by that girl at daycare, nothing else. You are not your mother." He said firmly, wishing her to believe it as much as he did.
Andy looked away from her husband's stare, and focused on her nail bit which had suddenly become very important. When she refused to really accept what he was telling her, he covered her hands with his own, and brought her attention back to him.
"Andy, love isn't divided, it multiplies. Okay? You are a great mother, and when you ever feel like you're not, or you're over whelmed, you've got me to take the load. That's why we're a team. I don't expect you to be one hundred percent all the time, and yes, juggling two kids will be hard at first, but we can do it."
Andy sighed, and flopped her entire upper body across his lap dramatically. He laughed at her, knowing that she really didn't want to put a damper on the pregnancy, and let her blow off the very serious things he'd just reassured her of.
"God, I don't know why I let myself go there. I know that's not going to happen. I know that I can't go a whole day without her." Andy whined comically, while Sam ran his fingers through her hair.
"I know that too. And I don't mind reminding you every day." He whispered, trying to get something started again.
"You know, when the baby comes, we're never going to have a minute to ourselves..." She replied, letting that really hit Sam. Him being the positive one was really throwing her off. "We're going to have to pawn them off on dad to get away for a night..."
"Well, it's not like your dad will mind."
"No I guess not. Maybe it won't be that hard to be alone together." She said, finally starting to give into Sam's infectious positivity.
"Mhm." He murmured, moving into to kiss his beautiful wife.
They were starting to get carried away, and he'd just managed to roll on top of her, when a little knock came from the door.
Andy laughed knowingly, and Sam rolled off again, scrubbing a hand over his face.
"Come in." Andy called softly.
When Mackenzie shoved the door open, she looked up at them with big sad doe eyes. Taser trotted into the bedroom behind her, making sure she reached her destination safely.
"Mama?"
"Yes Kenzie?" Andy replied, knowing exactly where this was going. Mackenzie no doubt had woken up having to go pee after that glass of water, and was too scared to go back to bed. This was one time that she wished they hadn't potty trained her so well.
"Can I sweep wif you? The big girl room is too big." She asked. Knowing their daughter too well, it'd be a few nights before she finally got used to being in a strange room alone.
Andy and Sam shared a knowing look, neither of them able to tell her no, not after the insecurity she felt earlier in the night. They just wanted to hold her close for a night.
They parted, leaving a space in the middle of the bed, and Mackenzie ran over to Sam who lifted her up and placed her in the gap.
Ten minutes later when she was on the brink of sleep, Andy scooted down to be face to face with Mackenzie. She reached out a hand, a stroked her daughters cheek with her knuckles.
"I'll love you forever I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be."
