Disclaimer: All material belongs to Hiromu Arakawa.

A/N: This was originally going to be part of my oneshot collection, but this grew to be much longer than I had anticipated, and therefore it gets its own separate fic.

This won't make sense now, but keep in mind that I'm assuming Amestris has unisex bathrooms...

Roy had absolutely no idea how he'd gotten himself into this situation. Well, no, he knew how, but he sure didn't know why he'd agreed to it.

The baby was crying, Riza was nearly pulling her hair out, and people were starting to look, not to mention that Roy himself had absolutely no idea what the hell he was doing.

"Hey, Roy, would you do me a favor?" Hughes had asked. He sounded so innocent. Freaking devil was what he was.

"I don't know, Hughes," Roy had responded, running a hand through his hair. He hadn't left the office yet, though it was technically past work hours – Hughes must have called his house phone first, and he was apparently persistent enough to check in with Eastern HQ to try to find him there. "What's the favor?"

"Oh, nothing big, it's just that Gracia's getting exhausted from being up all night with the baby all the time, and I thought she could use a little break, so I was hoping you-"

"No." Roy could see where this was going, and it wasn't a good place.

"Aw, come on Roy, when was the last time I asked anything of you?"

"Last week," Roy had grumbled at him. "You asked to borrow some money for lunch."

Hughes wasn't fazed. "Look, our sitter's got the flu and I don't want Elysia getting sick and I don't have anyone else who's available this weekend-"

"You want me to watch your infant daughter for an entire weekend?" Roy had demanded. "You remember who I am, right? I can't make it to work on time most days and you expect to hand me your six-month-old child and get her back in one piece?"

The Major was laughing. Roy's brow furrowed; this was the man's daughter they were talking about – Elysia, one half of Hughes' entire reason for living – and he was laughing at the prospect of Roy accidentally dropping her or setting her on fire?

"Ask Hawkeye to help; I'm sure she's better with kids than you are."

Roy had blinked at the suggestion; he hadn't thought of that.

"I'll take that as a yes. We'll drop her off on Saturday morning and pick her up Sunday night, all right?"

The Lieutenant Colonel faltered. "Wait, I didn't-"

"Gotta go, the baby's crying. See ya Saturday!"

And with that, any plans Roy might have had for his weekend were suddenly shot to hell. Same went for his Lieutenant, even if she didn't know it yet.

He wasn't entirely stupid. He'd made sure to buy her some flowers before stopping at her apartment in order to soften her up; he had a feeling she wasn't going to be thrilled with the situation, either.

She'd answered the door looking mildly upset at having been interrupted at whatever she'd been doing, though her expression softened a bit at the sight of her superior standing in the hallway outside her apartment.

"Sir, why-" she began, stopping abruptly as her eyes fell on the bouquet of lilies he held out to her. Riza stared at it for a long moment before asking, "What's this all about?"

"Take them; they're yours," he told her, a smile on his lips.

She tucked a loose strand of her growing hair behind her ear and hesitantly reached out, her fingers closing around the plastic, but her expression was slightly wary. "What's the occasion?" she asked.

Roy sighed. "Can I come in?"

She nodded, and he followed her inside, kicking his boots off beside the door. He didn't plan on staying terribly long, but he'd found that his Lieutenant was a bit compulsive with cleanliness, and if taking his shoes off at the door to prevent tracking dirt inside helped her out, it wasn't a problem for him.

Riza set the flowers down on the table, turning to her cupboards to search for what he assumed would be a vase to put them in. After a few minutes of rummaging around, she stood, sighing.

"I don't have anything to put them in, sir."

He waved a hand. "It's fine. I had something I wanted to ask you," he admitted.

Hawkeye merely turned to her stove, stirring a pot that was boiling. "And what was that, sir?" she asked, her tone neutral.

He took a deep breath before plunging into his tale of Hughes' ambush over the phone, how he would be taking care of a baby of all things this weekend, and how he absolutely, one hundred percent did not trust himself to take care of it- her. When he finished, Riza's mouth did something peculiar.

She smiled.

"And I assume you're here to ask for my advice on how to take care of infants? May I remind you, Lieutenant Colonel, that I have no children of my own, nor any experience with kids that I can use to help you with?"

Roy took another deep breath. "Actually… I was going to ask if you'd help me babysit." Without waiting to see her reaction, he pushed forward. "It was Hughes' idea, actually, and I figure that with two people watching her, things are less likely to go wrong…" he stopped as she faced him, wooden spoon in hand.

"May I remind you, sir," she repeated, "that I have no experience with kids?"

"I know that…" he muttered, beginning to feel a little frustrated on top of the helplessness that smothered him. "Please, Lieutenant? I need your help," he pleaded. The thought of doing this alone made him panic-stricken.

In the end, he wasn't sure what made her agree to help, but she finally gave in. They managed to work out the details – she'd spend the night at his house, he'd cook for her, etc. – over dinner, which Roy had been quick to tell her he was grateful for, since his own cooking tended to be sub-par.

And then he'd gone home, and dreaded the next few days in silence.

When Saturday morning arrived, Roy was a walking ball of nerves. Even when Hawkeye showed up, his tension didn't decrease by much. She flippantly offered to give him a back rub to calm him down, followed by a muttered "useless". He'd brushed her off, allowing his worry to eat at him.

Hughes was at the door sooner than expected, Gracia beside him with their little bundle of joy in her arms. Hughes carried several bags and what looked like a very long list of what Roy was sure were things he could easily screw up.

In less than ten minutes, the baby was in Riza's arms, Roy's were filled with toys and diapers and he didn't even know what else, and the Hughes' were speeding off in their car to spend the weekend somewhere up in Central (Roy hadn't paid close attention; they'd be too far to call in case of an emergency, and that was all he needed to know).

Beside him, Riza sighed. The baby in her arms was asleep; Roy's fist was clenched around the handle to a portable crib Gracia had thought to bring. Her first mission was to find a safe spot to set it up and lay her down. Roy agreed, shoving his load off on his kitchen table and directing her towards his bedroom.

"You don't have anywhere else to put her?" Hawkeye whispered, doing her best to keep the infant from waking. "What about tonight? Do you really want to sleep with her in the room with you?"

Roy shook his head. "This place isn't big enough for the three of us all to sleep in separate rooms," he murmured, wincing as he rounded a corner and banged the crib into the wall, not paying attention to where he was going. Riza jumped, but fortunately Elysia didn't stir. The Lieutenant breathed a small sigh of relief and continued following her superior down the hallway.

They hadn't gotten halfway through setting up the crib before Elysia woke up, a small cry escaping the baby's lips. Riza's shoulders sagged almost imperceptibly; she all but shoved her into Roy's arms while she trod to the kitchen to find the list Hughes had given Roy. She came back with a look of muted horror on her face.

"What?" Roy demanded.

She pointed a finger at the baby. "Well, sir, I believe she's hungry…"

Mustang's eyebrows furrowed in confusion for half a moment before following her gaze. Elysia's mouth, between cries, was nipping at his chest, searching for something she wasn't likely to find.

Roy had to resist the urge to fling her off of him; he did, however, hold her at a bit of a distance from his body, shooting his Lieutenant a look when she stifled a laugh. She quickly ran back out to grab one of Gracia's premade bottles, flicking the cap off and handing it to Roy.

"You mean I have to do it?" he asked, his tone slightly panicky.

"Sir, with all due respect, this is technically your job. I'm only here to make sure you don't break her."

"Fine," he grumbled, sitting down on the edge of his bed. He took the bottle from her, shifting the baby closer to him again. He eased the bottle to her mouth, and though she fussed for a few moments longer, she took it gratefully, becoming completely silent as she suckled from it.

Unbeknownst to Roy, Riza watched him with a melted expression. She'd never seen him look so… sweet.

Before she knew what she was doing, she was sitting next to him on the bed, enraptured with the scene before her. Roy teased her, asking if she wanted a turn with her. She shook her head. "No, I think she likes you," she murmured. "You're practically her uncle, you know."

"I know. Hughes has only told me that fifteen times," he chuckled.

After a few minutes, Riza left, going to sort out the bags that Hughes had left them with. Roy was too caught up with the child in his arms to notice much else, all of his previous anxieties momentarily forgotten.

Going to the park had been Riza's idea.

It was a great afternoon, he'd admit - it was June, and it had finally stopped raining the way it had for months. He didn't visit this place enough, being a location one usually took their family to, and he rather lacked that.

Riza, despite her earlier insistence that the baby was mainly Roy's job, was carrying Elysia, who was wide awake and, surprisingly, proving herself to be a very well-behaved infant. To their collective relief, she only fussed when she needed something, and was otherwise content to sit quietly and observe what was going on around her.

Roy laid a blanket Riza had reminded him to grab out onto the grass, setting down a basket of food he'd packed for the two adults and a few bottles. He had no idea how many they'd need and so had just grabbed half of what he'd been given.

It wasn't long before the ice cream stand caught his eye. He'd always had a bit of a sweet tooth...

He was standing up before Riza could ask what had happened. Roy fished his wallet out of his pocket, assuring her he'd be right back before striding towards the brightly-dressed cart owner. He laid down the bills, more than happy to receive the chocolate scoops and waffle cone.

Riza quirked an eyebrow at him when he returned. "That was what got you all excited? Ice cream?"

Roy nodded. "I haven't had any in months, Lieutenant. I think a man is entitled to indulge his sweet tooth every now and then," he said defensively.

She didn't roll her eyes at him, but Roy could practically hear her do it internally. "Very mature of you, sir. You might want to watch out, though. It doesn't take much to throw away your fitness level or your low body fat content."

At this, Roy's lips twitched. "And how, exactly, would you know my body fat levels, Lieutenant?" he asked suggestively as he sat down beside her, wagging his eyebrows at her. "Normally I'd say to keep your eyes to yourself, but I might let it slide with you," he said jokingly. They both knew his playboy attitude and sometimes crude behavior was merely an act, but nevertheless he did find it amusing to mess with her from time to time.

Riza wasn't amused. "You have to keep it below a certain level to pass your physical every year, sir. If you weren't up to standard physically, I wouldn't be working under you."

Roy chuckled at this, and when he opened his mouth to respond, she interrupted. "Sir, you might want to- sir!"

His eyes dropped down to see what she was gaping at; the suddenly crying baby in her arms alerted him to the mistake he'd made. He'd been leaning in too close to her, and his ice cream had begun to melt - it had dripped right onto Elysia's face.

Riza shifted away from Roy, hurriedly licking her thumb and wiping at Elysia's face, simultaneously trying to quiet her. "Dammit, Roy, you got it right in her eye!"

Roy watched helplessly as she stood, her eyes searching the park.

"What are you looking for?" he asked, raising his voice so that she could hear him over the wails that pierced the air.

"A bathroom."

"There's one that way," he told her, pointing in its direction. He'd barely gotten the words out of his mouth before she grabbed him by the wrist, yanking him off his feet.

"You're coming too. Throw the ice cream away," she ordered.

Roy's face fell. "But-"

"Throw it away, sir!"

He did as he was told, sadly tossing it into the nearest trash can on the way to the restrooms. People stared as Hawkeye dragged him and a screaming baby down the cobbled path that cut across the park, but if the blonde noticed, she didn't give any indication. Riza Hawkeye was on a mission.

Her grip hadn't loosened even slightly by the time they reached the restrooms; Roy pulled his hand free to open the door for her. His ears were beginning to hurt from Elysia's wails.

Riza rushed to the sink, turning the water on and splashing it onto the girl's face. She only succeeded in dousing herself, a large wet mark appearing on her shirt.

"Fantastic," she muttered.

"Here," Roy mumbled, holding his arms out for Riza to lay the kid down. He held her as Riza rinsed out her eyes, which were beginning to look red. Elysia kicked and flailed her arms and head about, fighting with her and crying even louder, if it were possible. Roy felt a fair bit of water splash him as well, though it didn't compare to the soaking mess Riza made herself.

Eventually she finished, taking the baby back from Roy. He immediately bolted, remembering the jacket he'd brought with him and had left on the picnic blanket. He returned shortly, offering it to Riza.

Her blank eyes fell on it. "What's that for?"

"For you," he said, gesturing to the giant dark spot on the front of her blouse. Without waiting to be asked, they traded, him handing her the jacket and taking the baby, who was beginning to settle down, thought the transfer upset her again. Her cries escalated quickly.

"Rock her," Riza ordered as she saw the look on Roy's face, and he tried his best. She turned slightly away from him, slipping her blouse over her head to reveal a thin white undershirt; she pulled out several paper towels to try to soak up some of the water in it before pulling Roy's jacket around her shoulders.

As she turned back to face him, she suddenly stopped. Something seemed to catch her eye. Roy looked up to see a small mirror on the wall, one which displayed the three of them - Riza, with Roy's jacket on; Roy, with a baby in his arms; the three together within the frame, as though they were a family.

Suddenly Roy felt a pang in his chest, and as he slowly turned to face Riza, their eyes locking, he knew she felt the same. They'd skirted around whatever there was between them for years, and by now they were used to it, but every now and then there would be a moment, such as this, that threatened to bring everything they hid to the surface. Moments such as these that reminded them of everything they couldn't have.

"Come on," he said after a moment of strangled silence. "Let's go make sure our stuff hasn't been stolen."

That night, Riza looked like she'd drop from exhaustion. She was much better with the baby than she'd given herself credit for; she'd changed her diaper like an old pro, and despite what she'd said about Elysia taking to Roy, she seemed to be much better at calming her than Roy could even hope to be. But her talents also seemed to drain her - there were visible bags under her eyes.

Nevertheless, she sat on the couch with the girl, feeding her one last bottle before putting her to bed. Her hand repeatedly slipped, though she focused intently on her task. As the baby began to fall asleep, Roy placed a hand on Riza's shoulder, stopping her from getting up. "I'll take her," he said gently, relieving her of the bundle of messes Hughes called his daughter. He swayed softly with her as he walked her to his bedroom, laying her in the crib and tucking the blankets in around her. His thumb brushed away a bit of breastmilk that had dribbled onto her chin.

Shutting off the light behind him, he shuffled back out to the living room to grab a glass of water before turning in. But seeing Riza made him stop.

She was slumped over on his couch, her eyes already closed. She hadn't even kicked her shoes off yet; Roy could only imagine how uncomfortable she was.

He stood in deliberation for a long moment.

Was he really supposed to just leave her there? He knew he'd promised to give her the couch - which unfolded into some sort of bed situation, but he wasn't exactly sure how that worked considering he'd never needed to use it - but looking at her now, he didn't feel it was appropriate to just let her sleep like that, out here in the living room by herself. And if the baby woke up in the middle of the night, he didn't want to have to face that alone...

That was how he wound up justifying untying her shoes and pulling them off her feet, shifting her so that her head was on his shoulder and his arms were underneath her, heaving her off of his couch. She stirred slightly, but he didn't stop. Roy carried her to his bedroom, slipping his own shoes off and pulling the covers back, laying her down on his large bed. Like he'd done with Elysia, he pulled the blankets up to her chin.

He knew she might be upset in the morning, or if they happened to wake up in the middle of the night, but for whatever reason, he decided to push his luck and crawled in beside her. Roy took an extra risk by draping his arm across her, finding her hand and taking it in his.

Roy was asleep within minutes.

Sure enough, when Riza woke in the morning, she wasn't ecstatic about this particular turn of events. Neither of them had moved all night, and miraculously, Elysia had slept through the night. Roy's fingers were still laced through hers, though there were a few inches separating the rest of their bodies.

She pulled her hand free of Roy's and rolled over, sliding a little bit away from him for propriety's sake. He was still asleep, a problem she'd quickly remedy. Riza wanted to know exactly what the hell he was thinking by bringing her into his bed.

She shook his shoulder; he quickly responded, his eyes blearily blinking and searching for the cause of the interruption from his sleep. When he recognized her face, he smiled widely at her, and for just a moment she faltered.

"Hey," he murmured, his morning voice rough and low.

"Don't 'hey' me," she retorted, though it didn't come out as forcefully as she'd intended. "What the hell, sir? Why am I in bed with you?"

"I didn't want you to be alone out there," he mumbled before rolling over and, presumably, falling asleep again. A glance at the clock told her it was only a little past six am. She had no idea how late he usually slept in on weekends, but she was fully awake, and she was sure the baby was going to need attention any minute now.

As if on cue, she heard a rustling noise from inside the crib. Sighing heavily, she kicked the covers back and crawled out of Roy's bed, picking the infant up before she began to cry. After feeding her some of the canned baby food Hughes suggested she try and changing her diaper, she woke Roy, who put up more of a fuss than the baby had.

The rest of the day passed by fairly quietly, due to Riza's unease around Roy after the stunt he'd pulled the night before. She knew they needed to talk about it to a certain extent but she used the baby almost like a shield, a way to fend off the conversation as long as possible. She was just as aware as he of the festering emotions under their exteriors, and she'd have been content to let them go ignored if he hadn't done what he'd done.

Unfortunately, the Hughes' were back to pick up their daughter sooner than expected. Gracia had come down with some sort of bug, and Maes was taking her home to get her some bed rest.

"How was she? I bet she was just a little angel!" Hughes cooed as he picked Elysia up off the blanket she'd been laying on on the floor, a toy still in her mouth. The six-month-old's eyes lit up as she recognized her father.

"Yeah, she was perfect," Roy deadpanned.

His tone was lost on the adoring father. "Of course she was, my precious little doll," he babbled at the baby, who laughed delightedly at him. Hughes continued to talk nonsense until Roy's brow creased in irritation. He grabbed the baby bags off the table and headed out the door, trying to discreetly nudge his friend out of his house. Riza followed him, carrying the fold-up crib and hoisting it into Maes' car when Roy held the door open for her. She waved briefly at Gracia, who was sitting in the front seat with her head resting against the side of the passenger side door, looking for all the world like she would faint at any moment.

"Thanks again, Roy," she heard Hughes call as he strolled outside, daughter in his arms. "And you, too, Hawkeye." He stopped in front of the car, gingerly shifting the baby to open the door and give her to her mother. He then pulled out his wallet, handing them both a generous amount of money.

Roy's eyes slid from his payment to Riza's, and his mouth instantly pulled into a slight frown. "Why are you paying me more, Hughes? She did more than half the work."

He laughed. "That's for the money I borrowed from you for lunch last week."

Riza looked between the two men for a moment, confused, before shrugging, realizing it was probably some private joke between them, and simply smiled.

When they were alone, Riza immediately began packing her things, furiously attempting to keep the man whose house she was in out of her thoughts.

Unfortunately, he decided right then to break her concentration. "Are you leaving?"

"Yes," she replied tersely. Steeling herself, she turned to face him - and stopped.

She'd meant to confront him about last night, to let him know exactly how inappropriate his actions had been, but something in his expression stopped her. He was looking at her with soft, relatively innocent eyes, and suddenly she understood. He hadn't necessarily meant anything by what he'd done, and if he did... well, what was there to be afraid of, really? She supposed this whole weekend had gotten to him, made him long for what his best friend had - and she'd felt it too, though she'd done her best to hide it even from herself.

He reached out to take her hand, and she let him, surprising both of them. Neither planned on leaving the other's side for years to come, and what feelings may exist between them could be figured out over time. They were adults, after all. And really, Riza couldn't deny that she very much liked the feeling of Roy's hand in hers.

A/N: Well, i really don't know how i feel about all of this... let me know your thoughts.