A/N: For HedwigBlack's weekly challenge and the Snakes and Ladders challenge by Fire the Canon. Technically this doesn't mesh with the timeline from the epilogue, but it's not particularly AU. I'm not JKR.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that any half-werewolf metamorphmagus with turquoise hair must be in want of a Weasley. The issue, for Victoire and Dominique at least, was which Weasley he would want. Teddy Lupin knew this, and watched with mild amusement as the two sisters argued, while he leaned casually against the Burrow and chatted with Harry.

"They want to marry you, you know."

Teddy smiled. "If they wanted to keep that a secret, they wouldn't have shouting matches about it 50 feet from me."

"It's the French in them, I think. I don't know what Bill and Fleur were thinking, getting married. Redheaded French children are twice the trouble of either trait alone, and that's saying something." Harry paused for a moment. "Keep that in mind, in case you do end up marrying one of them."

Teddy grimaced. "Ugh. You really think I'm thinking about marriage? Were you, at sixteen? Seriously, Uncle Harry. Thought you'd know better than that."

"Point taken," Harry said, and walked away.

When Harry walked in to one of the bedrooms at the Burrow two years later to find Teddy's arms wrapped tightly around the body of a girl with strawberry blonde hair, he coughed just loud enough for his godson to hear him. "Er, Teddy? Could I talk to you for a moment in the hallway?"

Teddy pulled his lips away from his girlfriend long enough to say, "Now, Uncle Harry? Seriously?"

"Yes, now. It will only take a moment, and then I won't have to send Fleur looking for you."

That caught his attention. "Um, be right back I guess?" Victoire nodded and went to sit on the bed.

"Okay, I'm here. What do you want?"

"Just wanted to see if you were thinking about marriage yet. And wondering when you planned on telling my family that you've been snogging Victoire."

Teddy looked down. "I was thinking maybe I would tell them when I propose."

"Well done, answering both questions at once. But I think Bill and Fleur would appreciate knowing that you're interested in her before you ask to marry her. Does Dominique know?"

"Not yet. We have only officially been dating for a couple of months now, and I'm afraid to break Dom's heart in the process."

"I think you should go and talk to her. The sooner you tell her, the less likely she is to be upset about it."

"Good point. I think I'll go find her now... without Victoire. Those two are bound to start a screaming match if they're in the same room together."

Harry swallowed, but said, "Okay, whatever you think is best."

Poking his head back into the room he had been in, Teddy said, "I'll be just a few more minutes, okay?"

"Okay, but hurry back," Victoire responded.

It was just Teddy's luck that pretty much every member of Victoire's family was in the sitting room downstairs. Not that they fit particularly well. Roxanne and Molly were squeezed into an armchair; Hugo, James, and Rose sat playing Exploding Snap on the floor; and there were about six adults squeezed onto the single couch in the room. Dominique was by the fireplace with Fred, the two involved in an animated conversation. Without any room to cross over to her, Teddy said from the entryway, "Dominique? Can I talk to you for a moment?"

"Of course!" she responded and flew over to him, tripping over the myriad legs of her cousins, aunts, and uncles as she left.

The whispers began before they had even left the room. "See? I told you it would be Dom!"

"No, this has to be something else. I'm sure there's something going on between him and Victoire. They seem to disappear at the same time all the time."

"No way; he and Victoire have always been more like siblings. He's about to ask Dominique out. I'd bet five Galleons on it."

"You'd bet five Galleons on anything, Uncle George. That hardly counts. But as I'm sure you're wrong, I'll take you up on it."

"Lily, you're not of age! You can't go making bets on anything. But I'll take you up on that, George."

"Mum, you're just trying to take my hard-earned money!"

"I'll split it with you, Lil."

"In that case, make it six, for an even split."

"Okay, George, six Galleons that Teddy is not asking Dominique out."

"Done."

By that point Teddy and Dominique had already made it outside and they began to walk around the garden. "So, Dominique... how are you?"

"Wonderful, now that I'm walking with you."

"Oh." This was not going the way Teddy had hoped at all. Maybe he should just skip the formalities and get straight to work. "Well there's something I need to talk to you about. See, it's been true for quite some time, and I wanted to keep it a secret, but there's really no use. Well, Dominique, I'm in love with-"

His words were cut off by Dominique pulling him into a suffocating hug. "I knew it, Teddy! I knew it was just a matter of time!"

"Oh, I didn't realize-"

"What are you talking about, Teddy? I love you, too! Didn't you know?"

If they had been paying attention, they would have noticed the faces pressing at the window, and Ginny and George arguing back and forth. As it was, Teddy was rather preoccupied trying to figure out the easiest way to break it to Dominique that she had misinterpreted him. Various polite sentences momentarily escaping him as he continued to suffocate under her grasp, he became exasperated and shouted, "Get off of me, Dom! I'm dating your sister!"

She pulled away quicker than he would've thought possible. "You're... you're... what?"

"I'm sorry, Dom. That's what I was trying to tell you."

"Oh." There was so much disappointment in her voice that Teddy wanted to reach out and pat her back, but thought better of it. "How long have you been dating?"

"A few months now, really."

Suddenly, Dominique's somber expression changed. "A few months? A few months?! And Vic never told me? Where is she? I'm going to..."

"No, Dom, don't-" But by then she was already running back inside the house.

He heard her march up the stairs and went to follow her, but her family in the sitting room stopped him. "Run upstairs to tell Victoire that she's got a boyfriend, has she?" George asked hopefully.

"Well, no. I think she's actually gone upstairs to start tearing out her sister's hair for secretly dating me for three months, so if you don't mind, I'm going to go make sure they're both going to stay alive." He didn't wait for an answer as he left the room, but by then he could already hear the sisters shouting upstairs. As he moved closer to the source, it left him completely deaf to the chaos he had caused in the room he vacated.

"Wait, what did he say?"

"I think he said he's been dating Victorie. For three months, too!"

"How did we not notice?"

"I'm not sure, but you owe me six Galleons, George."

"Gin, how could you think of money at a time like this?! Teddy and Victoire are together!"

"It's not like everyone didn't expect it to happen eventually, now pay up."

Back upstairs, Teddy entered the bedroom to find Harry trying to referee his nieces in vain. "Will you two stop?!" Teddy yelled. "Can we please just have a civil conversation about this?"

"No!" The sisters shouted at the same time, and Teddy and Harry both shrugged and left the room.

"I don't know what you tried to do, but I think there were probably better ways to break it to her, Teddy."

"I think you're right. I'm just gonna go home if you don't mind." He was not looking forward to the row he was likely to have with Victoire the next time they were alone.

"I don't mind, but you might want to let your girlfriend know you're leaving."

"Right." Cautiously, he opened the door to the bedroom again. "Er, Victoire? I'm just going to go back home. Feel free to meet me there when you're done."

When he walked back through the door to the home he lived in with his grandmother, Andromeda took one look at him and said, "An interesting day at the Burrow?"

"Trust me, you don't even want to know," Teddy said, and sighed.