That Awkward Moment When John Realizes His Life Belongs on MTV

It's really difficult not to listen, right? Standing in line at Tesco's or in a cab, there's always something to listen to.

While some people –Sherlock Holmes- can block it out, some people –John Watson- cannot.

Which is why he's been humming One Direction's One Thing for four days.

He saw them on X-Factor. They were on the first year he lived at 221B, and since he does get rather bored quite often, he promised long ago to watch X-Factor with Mrs. Hudson. Which was fine. John likes a good competition show. And these boys, well, they were good. They were adorable little kids with bigger voices than their shoes and now they're fucking everywhere. John can't go anywhere without seeing That One With the Big Curly Hair's hair and That One With the Pretty Face's face.

Finally it needed to stop.

"Why do you keep humming that tune?"

John looks up from his book to his One With the Big Curly Hair. "Hmm?"

"That tune, you've been humming it for days. I want to know why?"

"I don't know," John answers. "I haven't noticed."

"Well, I have. And it's annoying. At least learn the rest of the song."

"I don't know the rest of the song. That's all I know."

Sherlock sighs and pulls his phone off the night stand. He clicks around and finally begins to play the song.

"Why…do you know…the song…"

Sherlock rolls his eyes. "I do know things."

"You know songs by five twenty-year-old boys, but the earth—"

"I don't care about the earth!" Sherlock snaps, turning the song off.

"But…you care about…twenty-year-old boys…"

Sherlock lifts his chin and looks at his book. "You care about twenty-year-old young people."

John continues staring at Sherlock. "This conversation needs to end."

Sherlock smirks. "All I'm saying is that song is getting very, very annoying. Please pick another."

John doesn't answer.

After long moments of silence, Sherlock asks, "Why do you like it anyway?"

Without looking up from his book, John replies, "Not the same reason you like it."

Sherlock smiles. "I'm serious, John. Is this some sort of mid-life crisis? Should I be expecting a sports car or a motorcycle?"

John drops his book and glares at Sherlock. "How old do you think I am?"

"Older than me," Sherlock grins.

John chuckles at that. "I just like it, ok? The first time I heard it, I thought of…" he trails off in fear of saying something that will make Sherlock call him ridiculous.

Sherlock looks at his love. "Reminded you of what?"

"Nothing," John mutters.

Sherlock raises one eyebrow and stares at John. "John."

John sighs. He doesn't look up from his book. "It reminded me of you, ok? You know? Sometimes you hear a love song or watch a romance movie and you just think of the one you love. Anyway, it's silly. I'll try to stop, ok?"

Sherlock doesn't say anything. John doesn't look at him. His cheeks turn red with embarrassment. "Can we just…drop it?" he quietly asks.

"John," Sherlock says.

John takes a deep breath and looks at Sherlock. He's shocked to see Sherlock look…happy. Pleased. Loving. The tiny grin on Sherlock's face makes John smile. "What?"

Sherlock leans over and kisses John softly. They smile through the kiss.

"I love you," John whispers.

"Will you make me some tea, then?" Sherlock whispers back.

John instantly glares at him. "You prat," he mutters, getting out of bed. Somehow he still has a smile on his face.

Sherlock smiles and continues reading.

John gets tired of the tune two days later. Sadly he can't shake it from his mind, but luckily he doesn't stop listening to the sounds around him. And there's always music, everywhere.

So one day he's sitting in a cab on his way home from work and a song begins playing on the radio. He recognizes the song as one he's heard before, but he doesn't know what it's called or who sings it.

John listens to the song with interest. It's a catchy tune, he decides he likes it. Then the chorus rolls around.

You make me

Feel like I'm livin' a

Teenage Dream

The way you turn me on

John stares out the window. His head bops to the tune and at those lines he glances at the radio. He automatically begins to think of the one who turns him on. John bites his lip at the image of Sherlock's strip tease last night. It was really meant to be, all he did was push John onto the bed and strip himself before straddling John's hips, but it was, in fact, very very sexy. And what came after…mmmm.

The song continues. John enjoys it. Since it reminds him of Sherlock, he enjoys it even more. But now he can't stop thinking about his gorgeous boyfriend's gorgeous body. His long, lean limbs surrounded by thick, tight muscles. John's mouth goes a bit dry.

I'mma get your heart racing

In my skin-tight jeans

Be your teenage dream tonight

Oh, jesus… John thinks.

Let you put your hands on me

In my skin-tight jeans

Be your teenage dream tonight

John would never say that Sherlock's clothing was the first thing he noticed about the man. Of course there was the ridiculous coat and the scarf, but it was cold outside. However, the next day when John went to 221B, Sherlock was wearing those jeans all night. Those jeans. John's never been one to fancy fashion but…those jeans. They were made to fit Sherlock's body. They were made for that man. Those jeans, John thinks for the rest of the cab ride home.

John walks through the door to his flat to see Sherlock crouching next to the coffee table. His eyes migrate south to those fucking jeans.

"You've got to be kidding me," John mutters, pulling his coat off. It's not like he's needed it for the past ten minutes anyway.

Sherlock glances over his shoulder. "Ahh, you're back," he says. He drops a clear liquid into a beaker, sets his beaker down, then drops his knees to the floor and sits back on his heels.

"What are you doing?" John asks.

"Finishing up with this experiment."

"You couldn't do that in the kitchen? It's a little annoying that you're experimenting in our sitting room."

"I needed to be steady. Low center of gravity, better balance," Sherlock sets a timer and stands. His jeans are still scrunched up his thighs, his zip is perfectly cradling his crotch.

John stares at Sherlock's crotch, licks his lips once.

Sherlock adjusts his trousers. "John?"

John finally tears his eyes away and looks at Sherlock's curious face. He clears his throat. "Sorry, I just, uhm…"

Sherlock stares at him. "Obviously something has you fixated on my trousers. What is it?"

John sits in his chair and rubs his hands over his eyes. "I heard a song on the way home. It reminded me of you."

"Of my…trousers?"

John sighs. "One of the lines in it was about…tight jeans…the whole song was essentially about wet dreams…" He glances up on time to see Sherlock grin. "What?"

Sherlock gets an innocent look on his face. He spreads his legs a bit and plants his bare feet firmly on the floor. "These jeans?"

Fuck, John thinks. He didn't even notice that, yes, those exact fucking jeans.

Sherlock places his hands on his hips, broadening his shoulders and chest. He lowers his chin and looks at John through long eyelashes.

John licks his lips. He momentarily thinks about wanting to see Sherlock's arse, but he enjoys the angle he's sitting. "Come here," he quietly begs.

Sherlock steps forward. "What do you want to me?"

"Take your shirt off," John demands.

Sherlock does as told. He crosses his arms over his chest and steps into the reach of John.

John sucks on his bottom lip and pulls Sherlock close enough to stand between his legs. He strokes the back of Sherlock's thighs. Sherlock rests his hands on John's head. "Unzip," John says.

Sherlock groans and unzips then unbuttons his jeans. He doesn't pull his trousers down, instead he pulls his pants down enough so he can free his cock and balls.

John squeezes his arse as he does so. It's utterly obscene, that he's about to suck Sherlock off while Sherlock's still got his trousers on, but John definitely loves it. He grins but at Sherlock before opening his mouth and letting Sherlock in, never once losing eye contact.

Sherlock moans loud and fists his hands into John's short hair. John bobs his head back and forth for a few thrusts before he stops moving entirely. Sherlock groans and looks down at John. He holds John's head tighter and begins thrusting in and out of John's hot mouth.

John moans when Sherlock begins to thrust. He swallows Sherlock's cock with every bit of movement and rubs his hands over Sherlock's clenching and unclenching arse.

"Fuck, John…" Sherlock breathes. He moans loudly and continues to fuck John's mouth.

Minutes later, Sherlock comes with a loud, breathy moan. He straddles John's thighs and kisses him deeply, only breaking away to regain his breath. He smiles against John's mouth while taking deep breaths and asks, "What song was that, anyway?"

John laughs. "Fuck if I know."

"Pity, I'd love to make it your ringtone."

John laughs again. "I couldn't handle hearing that song as often as I would."

Unfortunately the song is stuck in John's head for a week. Fortunately, Sherlock's jeans are really rather spectacularly tight.

"John," Sherlock says the next morning over breakfast. "I'm putting this

App on your phone. When you hear a song that reminds you of me, use this app and it'll tell you what the song is."

"Why?"

Sherlock smiles. "Because now I'm curious."

A few days later, John's at a department store picking up a few shirts. He's been trying to work out more, trying to get back into perfect shape, and in the process he's gone down a size. Loose clothes get annoying very quickly.

He's browsing the shirts and absentmindedly humming when a very catchy song comes over the radio. He begins to tap his foot to the tune, which turns into a full body wiggle and dance.

He smiles when he finally catches some words:

Baby it's you.

You're the one I love.

You're the one I need.

You're the only one I see.

Come on baby it's you.

His mind. Sherlock, all the time. Even transitively; Sherlock needs this, Sherlock wants that. But he really does think about Sherlock all the time. Sherlock is all he needs or can see. Sherlock's the one he'll love for the rest of his life.

You're the one that gives your all.

You're the one I can always call.

When I need, you make everything stop.

Finally, you put my love on top.

John laughs at these lines. Sherlock definitely would not drop anything to

cater to John's needs, but there have been a few times when Sherlock's postponed an experiment for John or turned down a case for John. It's not often, it's only been a handful of times since they've been a couple, but the memories make John happy.

John quickly takes his phone out to use the app to find the song. When it loads, he screen captures the song title to show Sherlock.

"I really hate you sometimes," John mutters.

Sherlock spins to stare at John. "What did you just say to me?"

"I said I hate you!" John shouts. Then hastily adds, "Sometimes."

Sherlock crosses his arms over his chest. "Well I'm not very fond of you, either, to be honest."

John grabs his keys and phone off the kitchen table. "Fine. I'll just get out of your hair then."

John stomps down the stairs and Sherlock doesn't follow. Once on the street, John pulls his phone and headphones out to listen to some soothing music. He found long ago that it helps to listen to music when he's wound up, particularly the violin. It's sad when his own personal violinist is the person that's winding him up.

John opens up the music and quickly realizes it's not his phone. He grabbed Sherlock's on accident, so all he has is more current music. Shockingly, Sherlock doesn't like to listen to classical music unless he's learning.

John decides he really doesn't want to see Sherlock's face again, so he sets it on shuffle and listens.

He quickly loves the song that comes on first.

I think I've finally had enough, I think I maybe think too much

I think this might be it for us (blow me one last kiss)

You think I'm just too serious, I think you're full of shit

My head is spinning so (blow me one last kiss)

John laughs at the irony. Of course he's not going to break up with Sherlock, the fight wasn't that bad, but the song is catchy with slightly fitting lyrics.

The fight was over a few de-thawing extremities in the microwave. Sherlock told John he didn't have a sense of curiosity, that he's far too serious all the time, and that it gets very, very annoying. John told him he needs to grow up and stop being so immature, then the fight went from there. Pointing out flaws, saying hurtful things; the usual.

As soon as the song ends, John restarts it and turns around for home. He walks through the door as it ends.

"Ahh," Sherlock says, "Come home to apologize?"

"Nope," John answers. "I've heard a song that reminds me of you."

"Oh?" Sherlock asks, not the least bit curious.

John holds the phone up next to Sherlock's face.

Sherlock glances at it once, does a double take, and immediately stands up straight and stares at John. "John," he says. "You know that song is about breaking up, right?"

John grins and pulls his coat off. He toes off his shoes, untucks his shirt, and begins to unbutton it.

"What are you doing?" Sherlock wants to know.

"You're such a git," John says, pulling his shirt off his shoulders. "And you're annoying. And rude. And," John pauses to pull his undershirt over his head, then reaches for his belt. "And you're the dumbest person in the room even when you're the smartest." John pulls his jeans down and steps towards Sherlock. "And I'm damn well crazy about you," he says, taking Sherlock in his arms.

Sherlock is hesitant to reciprocate, but soon he wraps his arms around John's neck and buries his nose in John's hair. "Should I say…thank you?"

John chuckles. "No, it wasn't exactly a nice declaration of love."

Sherlock smiles. "What did the song have to do with me?"

John shrugs. He steps away from Sherlock and walks backwards towards the bedroom. He pulls at Sherlock's arm and Sherlock follows. "Perhaps it was the title," John says halfway down the hall as he begins to unbutton Sherlock's shirt.

"The title?" Sherlock thinks that over.

They reach the door as John's pulling Sherlock's shirt off. "Yeah, you don't know what it's called?"

"I'm…" John grazes Sherlock's cock as he reaches for Sherlock's zip. Sherlock clears his throat. "Ah-hem, uhm…I don't know."

John grins, pulls Sherlock's trousers and pants down, then falls back onto the bed. "It's called Blow Me."

Sherlock smiles and falls over John. He slowly presses kisses to John's neck and cheeks. "Is that what you want?"

John rubs Sherlock's back. "Mmmm, no. Right now I'd like slow, soft makeup sex. Maybe later you can blow me."

Sherlock chuckles. "I love you John," he says before kissing John's lips.

Once they break apart, John says, "I love you, too."

Over the years, John manages to make playlists at a time that remind him of Sherlock. Sherlock says he's far too sentimental, that all of that will ruin him one day, but John loves it. When he feels down or alone, he likes to listen to the songs and he feels better.

Most of all, the songs remind him of how much he loves Sherlock. and that's what he loves about the songs most.

*This is just a dumb silly thing that I thought would be funny. The songs, of course, are One Thing by One Direction, Teenage Dream by Katy Perry, Love on Top by Beyonce, and Blow Me (One Last Kiss) by P!nk, and all four are a few of my favorite songs. I have a headcanon that Sherlock likes top 20 songs. Hope you enjoy! Please review!