You're at their house. It's quiet now. Dirk sits across the table from you doing homework, Jane was gracious enough to offer to make dinner, and Roxy is... somewhere. Thanks to Jane's through explanation, you're able to write meaningless numbers down and get praised for it. You don't see the point in this school work.

The day had been nice though. The confusing classes weren't that bad. Everyone helped you so much. They even invited you over to help you with homework, even though it seemed more like Dirk didn't want you to leave his sight. You don't blame him though.

Keeping your eyes trained on the problem you should be doing, a small smile forms on your lips thinking about your friends. They make you smile and laugh. The world isn't such a scary place with them. Slowly your smile slips away as your thoughts keep turning further and further away from the problem on the page.

Like thoughts about how terrifying the world still is. The people, the city, the school, but mainly the people. How they all look at you. Whether they mean for their eyes to sweep over you or not, you can still feel the eyes. Only for milliseconds at a time, but with the mass amount of people in this city that fill the streets and the school, you are never free of the eyes.

The scariest part about it all, is that you never know what crosses a person's mind for those brief seconds they acknowledge your existence. It all happens so fast and does it even mean anything? Does a first impression even mean anything?

If you were dead you wouldn't have to worry about peoples preying eyes or their thoughts. People would make no difference. If you had died you would never had made such wonderful friends, but you wouldn't need them like you do now. The sinking feeling comes back.

That feeling so deep that you fear it will drag you down so far you'll never be able to escape. From the hole that forms in the pit of your stomach shouts your worst fears and insecurities. You're alone, but Dirk is right there. You're eyes dart up from your page and study him. He's right there because he cares about you. You can see his eyes through the glasses dart back and forth, studying the page. Your breath quickens, as if trying to fill the hole before you fall too far. Dirk is so far away, he's safe from suction of the pit. Completely oblivious. You're alone in this fight. The hole gets bigger.

Griping at the edges, you call out for help, but the words won't come. It's sucking you in, draining your strength. He doesn't notice you need help. You can't move, you're falling. There's no air here, you're falling too fast, faster than your tears. Its dark, Dirks' face is blurred as he looks up in alarm. He says something, but you can only hear the pounding of your heart. He runs over, but you don't think he'll be able to catch you, you're falling too fast.

His strong arms wrap around you, but they can't stop you. You're gone, there's nothing left inside you but a hole. Why can't you come back? Dirk is there now, he can help you, but you're still so alone. You wrap your arms around Dirk and press your body against his. His heart beat echoes in your ears along with your own. You're not alone, but the loneliness won't go away.

A fragile hand gently touches your back. It moves up and down your spine in a comforting motion.

"Deep breaths," a sweet voice mummers.

It reminds you of your grandmothers voice when you were little. Whenever you would fall and scrape your knee, she would rub your back and tell you to take deep breaths until you stopped crying. Then she would kiss your scrape and tell you it was all better. It's going to be okay. Maybe it will be.

Without realizing you listen to the voice and your tears come to an end as well. The arms around you are warm and comforting, you decide to focus on those instead of the falling sensation that seems to slowing down. After a few minutes of relishing in the comforting gestures, you have finally landed in an unsure place. You're dazed and confused, but you're somewhere solid. A solid place you need to face whether you want to or not. Reality is one of those impossible monsters you can never seem to hide from.

Opening your eyes and letting the harsh light from the dining room invade your damp eyes, you find that your face is buried in Dirk's shirt. Slowly you lift your head up. Your glasses are crooked, but you don't let go of Dirk to fix them. A small hand reaches up and fixes them for you, cupping the side of your face afterwards.

Turning your head you find yourself looking at a very worried Jane. It seems she is kneeling beside you and Dirk. Wait, you're on the floor? Okay then. Dirk's arms loosen a little from their tight grip around your torso and you turn to look at him.

"You okay now?" Surprisingly, he looks just as concerned as Jane.

Swallowing, you nod and unwrap yourself from Dirk. You're about to push yourself out of his lap, but he holds you there. He examines you through his shades. You have to say it's a little uncomfortable.

"Are you sure?" He interrogates. You can feel his eyes boring into you and you wish he would just let you go.

Looking away from him, you nod again, but he doesn't let go.

"Tell me you're okay Jake."

You're not a child, you can take care of yourself, but regardless you look back into his shades and stable your voice as best you can. "I'm fine now Dirk. You can let go."

His jaw clenches slightly as he lets go and you stand up. Looking at the table you see Jane has set dinner on it. She and Dirk both rise from the floor and you all stand a little awkwardly.

"I'll go get the rest of the food," Jane says with a forced smile, "Dirk, do you mind finding Roxy? I wouldn't want for her food to get cold."

Dirk nods, "Sure thing."

Jane doesn't move as Dirk leaves room. Glancing over at her, she's staring off in space. Clearing your throat, she jumps slightly and turns to you.

"Would you help me in the kitchen?"

"Of course." You nod and follow her into the kitchen.

Walking into the kitchen you see the works of a jolly good dinner. Jane quickly tends to the pots still simmering on the stove and you look around for a way to help her. Seeing a stack of dinner plates sitting out, you decide you can make yourself useful by setting them out.

Before you can pick up the plates, Jane turns on you and blurts, "What happened?"

You stand there a bit awkwardly not knowing if you can even explain yourself, but it seems you don't have to, as Jane starts searching for words again.

"I don't mean to make you angered," she adds quickly, "but I just, I mean," she sighs and looks down at the spoon she still has in her hands, "I heard a loud noise, so I went to go check on you all and," she pauses and looks up at you, those beautiful blue eyes burdened with worry. "When I saw you had collapsed like that, I was really scared Jake. I feared that maybe the day was too much for you, or something serious had happened. I haven't seen Dirk that emotional over something in long time. I worry about you, Jake."

"You shouldn't-"

"Well I'm going to!" She declares, as she shakes her spoon at you for emphasis.

It's your turn to rebut, but you're not quite sure what to say. Jane stares at you for a bit before taking a step forward. Instinctually you take a step back only to jam your back into the counter. The thought occurs to you that your fright might have offended Jane, but when you check, she smiles softly and gently takes the few steps across the kitchen to you.

Standing in front of you, Jane looks up at you. Her stare is friendly, almost mother like you think. Though you stand a head taller than Jane, her mother like aura belittles the authority your height gives you. She's one of those people that you learned to trust easily without even realizing it. If she wants to know something, you don't think you could bring yourself to keep it from her.

Knowing you'll fall apart if she asks what happened again, you brace yourself; but instead of the onslaught you were expecting, she raises her arms in a gesture you have become familiar with of late. At first she hesitates, asking for permission, when you make no move to stop her, she wraps her arms around your torso and pulls you close. Her small hands grip your shirt and her soft, dark hair tickles your chin as buries her face against your shoulder.

You can feel the life in Jane. You can feel the rapid beat of her heart against your own chest and feel the little breaths she exhales against your neck. In a moment those soft breaths are vibrations on your neck, words.

"Jake," Jane starts softly, "I really do worry about you and if you don't want to tell me what happened, I understand, but-" her voice wavers and she pauses to take a deep breath "but at least tell me you're okay now."

Instead of answering right away, you find yourself wrapping your arms around her as well. It seems your embrace comforts her. Her muscles relax and she leans against you. You presume Jane is waiting for you to speak, but you stay silent and hold her. You don't want to speak and ruin the peace that has been created. Maybe this is exactly what you needed. You don't quite understand why hugs are so comforting, but you now understand why everyone insists on giving them to you.

The two of you stay like that until you hear spirited laughter coming down the hallway. Releasing her from your arms, she turns back to the finished food on the stove and you reach for the plates. Dirk and Roxy's murmurs can be heard from the next room and they're probably curious to where dinner is. Taking the plates out you pause at the door way and say over your shoulder, "I am okay. Now at least."

Dirk takes the time of day to track you down, god knows that took effort, and then you both sit down to empty table. Jake came out with the plates soon after, but you decided that you needed to take matters in to your own hands. Coming into the kitchen you don't know what in the heavens you expected to see, but you sure weren't expecting to find Jane leaning against the stove smiling at a pot like it just popped the big question. You understand her love for cooking, but you fear this has gone too far. She might need help.

Knowing it's better to confront the problem sooner than later, you walk up behind her and set a hand on her shoulder. Jane jumps in surprise.

"Roxy!" she exclaims with a huff. "You took me by surprise there."

"I wasn't in stealthy mode Janey," you inform her.

"Well, I must have been distracted."

You give her a long, knowing look. "Is there something you're not telling me?"

Jane is taken aback. "What?"

"I'm your best friend Jane; you can tell me anything."

Poor Janey looks so confused. "Of course Roxy, but I honestly have no clue what you are talking about."

"Tell me about that pot Jane," you prompt her.

"The pot?" She looks at the stove and back at you even more befuddled.

"Yes," you point to the one closest to the edge, "that one right there."

"It's a pot?"

"Now don't be fresh with me Jane."

"Good lord Roxy!" Jane exclaims. "Just tell me what you're trying to get at here!"

"I was sitting out there at the table getting all impatient," you explain, "and I decided to come on in here to see what the holdup was, and-"

"Oh dear, I should bring this out there!"

"Wait, wait, wait," you stop her. "I'm not done with my story yet."

Jane sighs. "Hurry it along then."

"So I came on in here and I see you staring at this pot like it's the love of your life. You know, the whole goofy grin and loving stare. You're allowed to love cooking and all, but I-"

"Roxy"

"Don't think this is best-"

"Roxy!"

"Way to- huh?"

Jane has her hands covering her face and she takes a big sigh before removing them. "Roxy, I'm not in love with a pot."

"Well, that's what I figured," you admit.

"Then what is it you are trying to prove?"

"What you and Jake were in her doin' instead of setting the table." You add an eyebrow wiggle for emphasis.

"Talking," she answers shortly. Too shortly.

"Aaaaand?"

"And we hugged. Is it just me or do you have to most perverted mind in this house?"

"It's not just you Janey," you laugh as Jane picks up the pot and finally starts to transfer its contents top a bowl. "But in all seriousness, that's adorbs."

"It's nothing and that's all it will ever be," Jane declares as she walks out the door with the bowl.

"Sure it is," you mock, trailing after her.

It was late when you finally returned to Aradia's house. Knowing you have to face another round of school in the morning sleeping would be the most logical thing to do, but you can't resist the urge to pull out the book Jane gave you. Just a few chapters won't hurt, you tell yourself as you lay back on the bed.

The crash from the kitchen wasn't the unusual sound that drove you to close the enticing book, it was the yelling. Sometimes Aradia yells when she accidentally breaks something, but there was a lower voice that was doing most the shouting.

Creeping out of your room, you can hear their words more clear in the hallway. The curious thing is the time. It was almost ten o'clock when you returned to Aradia's house and you've been reading for close to an hour. No one would come for a visit at this time of night; would they?

You shuffle to the top of the stairs and listen. You don't know what you would do if Aradia was in any sort of danger, but you surely wouldn't just sit around. A quick vow to yourself ensures that you would do anything you must to help Aradia if she is ever in any danger, just like a true gentleman would.

There's a moment of silence before you can make out the deeper voice, "No, shit, don't cry AA. I'm not mad, just thocked, s-shocked. Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

Aradia's voice comes much softer, so you take a careful step down the stair case.

"I couldn't leave him, and I don't know. I'm sorry." You catch Aradia's whispers from the kitchen.

"Fuck, no, AA, don't be thorry. It's just that you're twenty five!" The male voice becomes louder. "What the hell are you doing with a kid? You're not exactly mother material."

You take another few steps down, to avoid losing the quiet side of the conversation.

"That's why I need help."

"Like hell I'm raising a kid!"

"It's not like Jake's a little kid. He's a fifteen year old who-"

"Is fucking suicidal."

At those words, you halt your descent and grip the banister. The house is silent. The grandfather clock ticks agonizingly five times before Aradia's sob breaks the silence. There is a movement of fabric and then her sobs are muffled with gentle murmurs. But still you are frozen until the male speaks again.

"What have you done Aradia?" He asks rhetorically. "It's not your fault." He rebuts to Aradia's murmured reply. "Something's are meant to happen."

"How about him being bullied?" Her voice raises and you flinch. "Or trying to commit suicide in my house, on my watch? Is he 'meant' to be forced to be put through hell?"

"Some people don't belong on this earth."

"Sollux!" She screams, and you debate whether you want to continue your eaves dropping or retreat back to your room, but you have to say you are intrigued with this stranger.

The man joins the screaming, "Thome of uth are better off dead!"

"Stop," Aradia commands firmly.

"If he hath no reason to live, you can't just create one. It's not that eathy."

"Sollux, stop," Aradia begs, but the man continues on as if he hadn't even heard her.

"What liberty do you have to put yourself in the way of that boy's happiness?!"

"I said stop!" She cries and you find yourself at the bottom of the staircase and creeping towards the kitchen.

"Face reality Aradia. If you can't hear it, the plea, then you can't take care of the damn kid."

Aradia sniffles, but stays quiet. You know you shouldn't be here, your every instinct tells you to go upstairs, but curiosity always kills the cat and you dare to peek into the kitchen. Still hidden, you can only see Aradia's red face streaming with tears and the man, Sollux, running his hands through his messy, black hair. You can't see his front, but you're sure he is distressed as well. He wears a simple tee-shirt and jeans with tennis shoes. You're not quite sure how you feel about him. He made Aradia cry, but he seems different form everyone else. You're interested in what he has to say.

He seems to have calmed from his rage as he continues, "You don't understand what you've gotten yourself into. It's not going to be easy. The kid wants to die and he's going to try it again. I promithe you! Sure he's only tired it twice, but he's thinking about it every day. Every damn day!" His voices cracks and his hands pull at his hair. He takes a deep shaky breath before continuing. "Every day he wonderth, why me? He dreamth about it. Not having to put up with the world any more. Juth disappearing. You may want to change that, but it takes more than juth medication. It taketh purpothe," he pauses as his lisp becomes worse, but continues after taking a frustrated, deep breath, "purpose and it's hard. Too fucking hard. Death is so much easier than this shit."

Taking your eyes off the man, you look back at Aradia's enraged face.

You don't like to see her cry, but he's right. Her hands cover her face and she taking effort to control herself. The man, Sollux, wraps his arms around her and they stay like that for a bit before Aradia speaks again.

"I don't know what to do," she whispers, "I need your help."

He laughs dryly. "I would just make things worse."

"Then what do I do?"

He pulls away and shakes his head. "That's what I mean. You're insane if you're asking me for help. I don't think there's anything you can do."

"I'm not giving him away," she shoots back.

"I don't want to lose you Aradia."

"What?"

"If he does it-"

"It's not going to happen," she insists.

"But if he does, you'll never be the same. I couldn't stand to be deprived of the smile that makes you, you. You're all I have and that boy wants to die. You can't save everybody."

On the brink of tears again Aradia breaks eye contact with him and looks crossed the room, only to find you. She looks startled, but you both just stare for a moment before she forces her smile to cover her blotchy cheeks and red eyes.

"Jake! I didn't see you there."

Sollux whips around and looks at you. He looks as jagged as he sounds. His bones jutting out, eyes cold and confused, skin pale and malnourished, and posture slightly slumped as if he doesn't have the energy to stand up straight. You feel both their eyes on you, Solluxs' different colored eyes seeming to put the most pressure on you to make the next move. Two options are presented to you. One being you can pretend you didn't hear anything, the second being truthful.

Taking a deep breath you're prepared to speak, but your voice only comes as a whisper. "He's right."

A small smirk quirks on Sollux's lips and Aradia has lets her halfhearted facade fall.

Sollux walks over to you and ruffles your hair. You freeze at the contact, but it's not completely unwelcome. Looking up, you meet his eyes. You're not sure what you see in there, but he smiles at what he sees in yours.

"Hey AA, I might actually get along with a kid for once."