This is really not the next chapter. I just had to answer a comment I got from a guest. Had the guest been logged in I would have PM'd her. So this is the only way I have to answer her. I've out since I was thirteen years old. I knew in sixth grade when I tried to give Marsha Fartenbury a box of chocolate for Valentine's Day.

I had an advantage. I was the tallest kid in school, so everybody was afraid of me. Not to mention I was so angry about my parents, I had a constant chip on my shoulder.

As someone, who was never in the closet in anyway, I can't relate really, but I can tell you a story about someone that may help. I was 'unofficially' married for sixteen years from 1974 to 1990 to a great woman from the Philippines. I met her when I was in the Air Force as an electronics specialist. She was totally straight, extremely Catholic and for life of I don't know why, totally in love with me.

She had a very difficult time coming out to her parents, who thought I was Satan. Her father even came at me with a bolo, a long nasty looking knife. I have always been good at violence and I took it away from him before either of us got hurt. I digress.

Anyway, Sylvie loved me so much that she came out to her family, who instantly rejected her. Additionally, not being able to marry her officially, I couldn't get her back to the States. She knew this and came out anyway. It was the bravest thing I ever saw.

She knew that she might not have my protection when I left, but she came out anyway. Her father would have killed her, literally. So, I borrowed $15,000 and bribe so many bureaucrats that I still can't remember them all.

Anyway, I got her to the States as an immigrant, green card and all. However, that was months after she came out and only weeks before I was being discharged from the Air Force.

So, when I think of what it takes to come out. I think of my Sylvie, who I lost in 1990 when she and her best friend were stealing a wife from a man who was abusing her. To this day, I regret not going with her. I had tickets to a football game and took the kids to see the game. I have to live with that guilt, but she gave me four wonderful kids and in those days you had to get the sperm the old fashion why… No turkey baster back then. I told you she was the bravest woman I ever met.

So, when you have some doubt about being who you are. Think of the young girl, who never weighed over a hundred pounds, ever after four pregnancies, who risk her life coming out because she loved a foreigner. I still haven't recovered from losing her.

I have had many lovers over the years and have one now, but none of them could compare to the love of my life. My children are all grown and out of college, so I guess we did alright. I have four lovely grandbabies. One of them is about to graduate High School. I'm getting so old.

Bravery isn't being unafraid. Bravery is doing something, when you are scared shitless of the outcome.