The Morning After: A Sherlock Holmes and Dr John Watson Story

It is unusual to come across a story of the great detective, Sherlock Holmes, without it being written either by the man himself or his trustworthy companion and friend Dr John Watson. Blessed we should be then when a story emerges written in neither of their hands, but surely worthy of inclusion into the wide reaching canon of Sherlock Holmes and his adventures.

The story cannot be dated, however we would do well to assume that the events described in the following extract occurred sometime in the early 1900s, perhaps even between 1905 and 1908, long after Holmes made his extraordinary return from a watery grave, and the unfortunate death of Watson's wife Mary.

It was a cool and brisk morning around Baker Street, and Watson embarked upon joining the company of Holmes over the morning papers.

Opening the proceedings Watson addressed Holmes, "I hope I did not wake you last night, I went out for a breath of fresh air as my mind has been racing at an unusual pace recently."

Sherlock rose from his paper and approached Watson, placing his head in the air around Watson's neck and receipting himself with a large intake of air. He then went back to his paper and uttered the phrase, "I'm sorry."

Astonished Watson enquired as to the meaning of Sherlock's actions. In response Sherlock displayed the attributes that even after all these years still surprises, and concerns, Watson.

"I confess my dear Watson, my apology is only indirectly related to my actions upon your neck, and my apology will only become clear once I have given my deduction of which I know you will be demanding and I will have to give, so to save you of effort on your part I will continue.

"As by your own admittance you spent some of this early morning out 221B Baker Street, however by admitting this I fear you have confirmed to me that you are trying to hide something.

"My first thoughts were that perhaps you were keeping company of a woman; knowing your keenness for the fairer sex, this was naturally the first conclusion I would draw upon you. If this were true however there would had been no need to sneak back into Baker Street at such an early hour as it would be more than natural for you to have spent the breakfast hours in her parlour. Perhaps then you had to leave early to hide your act from someone. It would not had been me as you know you cannot keep anything from me, as I am demonstrating, so perhaps you are hiding in fear of her master, or father. These deductions were irrelevant however once I had caught no sniff of perfume amongst your person.

"This counted out my secondary assessment that perhaps you had visited an Opium House. Whilst I know this sort of action is not of your usual behaviour, perhaps your reaction to my more unsavoury habits makes it more imperative for you to hide yours. Upon closer inspection of your fingers I notice no yellow marks, nor had I smelt the signs of opium around your demeanour.

"It amazes me that the so called detectives within Scotland Yard would disregard even the practise of smell from their investigations, as after one sniff of you I have already ruled out two possible situations you could have found yourself in last night.

"Indeed there could have been an element of truth in your original statement. However if it were true you only went out for some fresh air, then it would had made the most sense to combine that action with the act of walking. This I can tell is not the case. To begin, you still have your slippers on. I have observed that you were wearing these slippers during your early morning adventures because of the tiny particles of dirt you can perceive are along their sides. This dirt is formed close like a community; if you were out for a walk then the dirt would be spread, showing splashes across the slipper. As this is not the case then it implies that you went either for a slow short walk or were standing stationary amongst a dirty surrounding.

"What therefore could you be doing at such an hour, whilst standing still, and felt obliged to try and hide from me, your most closest of friends?

"More can be added to the story from your attire alone. You wear a long dark brown dressing gown covering an unusual set of black pyjamas. Our long acquaintance has informed me that you prefer the lighter touch when applying your bedroom clothing, normally going for a white outfit, this appearance that graces my eyes then is highly uncommon.

"I believe I am certainly correct when I suggest that you were doing something you do not wish for me to find out.

"Let's consider again your lust for the fresh air. You astound even myself as I have to admit I did not hear you leave or return this morning, such was the intensity I applied to my studies into the different formations of finger nail compared to the owners' nutrition, and for my quest for perfectionism when it comes to the violin. Therefore I admit I am unsure of how long you were out. Regardless of this I can assume that it was for a while as I notice that the mildew upon the bottoms of your dressing down. If you were out for a short time then the damp would be wispy and only cover the very bottom of your gown. However this damp has risen and is more inset, therefore suggesting you were out for a longer period of time; once again confirming to me that you were not out for just fresh air.

"And now for the crux – the solution; it has not escaped my mind that a fresh faced woman of Indian descent has recently moved into an abode not far from our own. Since this woman has come to our attention you have been ever-slightly been acting more sluggish than usual, as though you were infatuated. I know of your secret fancy for an Indian woman, so I deduce that in the early hours of this morning you left these here premises to the house of the woman in question. As there is not a suggestion that you were invited in it would suggest to me that you spent the proceeding hours stood outside of her window, allowing your gown to get soaked, your slippers to be given a dashing of dirt, and a hint of a petal to become eloped to your right foot, this suggesting you were standing in her flower bed which would usually be found by a downstairs bedroom window.

"If I did not know any better Watson, then it would appear to me that you have been taking part in a bit of deviancy. And that, my dearest Watson, is why I offered you my pre-emptive apology, as I am aware that such accusations in a non-offensive environmental may lead to a slap upon the face of the accuser.

"I further deduce that the look on your face shows that my apology has gone unheard."

*Slap*