Hello everyone! I know I should be working on my DRRR fic, but. . . This just /had/ to be done! This is a collab/RP fic with Ember8123 ^^. She is Jake and Dave, I am Dirk and AR. I hope you enjoy~! DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters or places mentioned in this fic. Characters belong to Andrew Hussie, places belong to the world.
-TT began pestering GT-
TT: Hey, English. ◥▶◀◤
GT: Hey bro.
TT: Sup?
GT: Absolutely nothing! I was just about to settle down and watch some rather enjoyable tomb raider movies!
GT: Whats going on with you strider?
TT: There's really nothing to do by me.
TT: Hey, English, I have a question for you.
GT: Oh? What kind of an inquiry would that be?
TT: What would you do if I said I liked you? Hypothetically, of course.
GT: If you liked me? Well id assume that would be just fine!
GT: After all we are bros and one does have to like another to be brothers dont they?
TT: That's not what I meant, English.
TT: I meant in a romantic way, again, hypothetically.
GT: Oh...
GT: Well strider i suppose that would be okay as well
GT: Ive never really given any thought about my feelings towards anyone but i suppose i would be up to giving any relationship a try.
TT: Seriously? You're not shitting me?
GT: I would never shit you strider.
GT: Something like that would be unquestionable.
TT: Jake, I love you.
GT: Youre not just saying this for ironic reasons are you? You mean it dont you?
TT: Yeah, I mean it.
GT: So what does this mean exactly?
TT: Well, I guess. . . We're in a relationship?
GT: I guess so!
GT: I never thought that i would end up in a relationship with my closest bro. And not ironically.
TT: Dude, we should try to do an offline meeting sometime.
GT: But i thought you lived sometime in the doomed future where our entire planet is in ruins.
TT: Actually, I don't know how this happened, but somehow, I was able to talk to a different, younger version of my bro and together, we created this time machine/transporter device.
-flashback-
-TT began pestering TG-
TT: Hey, so. . . apparently you're some younger version of my bro from an alternate universe?
TG: i am?
TG: does that mean youre some younger version of my bro from another universe somewhere in this fucked up galaxy?
TT: Yeah, probably. ◥▶◀◤
TG: thats pretty boss
TT: How the hell are we talking?
TG: i must have fucked up the timelines so badly that our goddamn universes crossed somewhere along the way
TG: so
TG: irony
TT: Wait, timelines? Are you the something or other of Time then?
TG: knight of time
TG: its pretty awesome even if i had to get used to the damn cape it came with
TG: then again the cape is pretty awesome too
TT: Cool shit. I ended up being the Prince of Heart. Pretty sugoi if you ask me.
TG: whoa whoa
TG: sugoi?
TG: what kind of shit is that?
TT: Sugoi, it means awesome.
TG: ah
TG: never say that again
TT: Sure thing.
TT: Well, since you're the Knight of Time, I need you to help me with something.
TG: what do you need help with?
TT: Building a device that can achieve time travel and teleportation.
TG: how the fuck are we going to do that?
TT: I'm pretty good with mechanics, if I do say so myself. I've already got teleportation down, I just need help with the time travel.
TG: so how am i supposed to help you out with the time travel?
TG: i dont know if i can exactly transfer my powers into a goddamn machine
TT: What tool do you use for time travel?
TG: my turntables
TG: but there is no way im giving those to you i need them
TT: Is there a way to create another set of them? It's not like I need them forever, either.
TG: well
TG: if you had the code i guess you could use it for the alchemiter.
TG: but it might be easier to just fucking let you borrow them as long as you give them back when youre done
TT: Chill, bro. I'll give them back.
TG: good
TG: so how the hell am i supposed to give them to you to borrow
TT: I'll teleport one of my two teleporters to you. Warning, it's kind of big.
TG: ah shit is it gonna take up the entire space of my room?
-TT sends a fairly large teleporter crashing into the middle of TG's room-
TG: holy shit that thing is huge
TG: i can hardly fucking move around in my own room now
TG: goddamn
TT: Sorry, man.
TT: I told you it was big.
TG: its cool i guess
TG: so when do you want the turntables?
TT: As soon as physically possible, but preferably not in the past.
TG: as soon as i find a way to move around without hurting myself ill give them to you
TT: Cool, bro. I'll be waiting.
TG: finally fucking got it but now im sitting in my damn chair like a fucking owl sits in a tree or some shit
TG: im fucking owling now thanks
TG: go check your transporter or whatever
TG: they should be there
TT: They're not there.
-5 min later-
TT: Oh, wait. Now they are.
TG: dont do that man
TG: gave me a fucking heartattack making me think i sent them to the wrong place or some shit
TG: nearly fell out of my motherfucking feathery coop and disturbed my owl stance
TG: caw caw
TT: I'm pretty sure you sent them 5 minutes into the future, since I just fucking spent 5 minutes staring at the teleporter for them.
TG: you spent five minutes of your life staring at a teleporter
TG: you couldnt find something better to do?
TG: why do you want to build a time machine anyway i never really asked that did i
TT: I don't know how, but I started talking to some people from a different time and I got a brocrush on one of them. Want to be able to visit him, you know?
TG: that makes sense i guess
TG: wait like a brocrush or an actual crush
TG: theres a major difference dude
TG: because brocrush is like . . . never mind thats kind of an actual crush too
TG: but forget about that and just hurry up and make the machine so i can get my turntables back as soon as possible
TT: Will do, bro.
-6 minutes in the past-
TT: Hey bro, it works.
TT: I went back to the time you sent me your turntables so you could get them as soon as possible.
TG: whoa what
TG: oh there they are
TG: its cool that it works though now go and visit your brocrush or whatever
TG: ill be here owling
TT: Cool, thanks.
TT: Oh, here's a present for the help.
-TT sends TG 8 smuppets-
TG: wha- oh hell no
TG: dude i see enough of these from my bros room!
TG: we dont need any more of these damn things!
TG: i fucking got some for christmas last year thanks to my bro
TT: I sent another gift to your past self. I'm pretty sure you remember the shades you had when you were a baby. ◥▶◀◤
TT: If you want, I can make them an AR for you.
TG: fuck those shades were humiliating
TG: hell no
TG: i like the shades i have
TG: theyre cool and ironic
TG: and also a present from a friend
TT: The shades I gave you are sugoi as hell.
TG: yeah when i was like seven
TG: the shades john gave me are fucking ironic as all hell
TG: and i thought i told you not to say that word
TT: I wouldn't know what your current shades look like. They probably look stupid.
TG: they are not stupid
TG: theyre cool and ironic
TT: Whatever you say, bro.
TG: you wouldnt know cool if it bit you on the ass
TT: I'm more sugoi then you'll ever be.
TG: stop saying that fucking word
TG: my god
TT: Well, I'd love to chat with my bro some more, but I have a hot piece of ass trying to message me. Have this for your whole "irony" thing.
-TT sends TG a giant stuffed owl-
TG: whoa whoa hot piece of ass
TG: who is this hot piece of ass
TG: oh fuck that is a giant stuffed owl
TG: i cant lie that is pretty fucking ironic
TT: His name is Jake English.
TG: thats the dude you built the time machine for isnt it
TT: No, it's the stuffed owl's name. . . Obviously it's the guy I built the time machine for.
TG: man i already got a name picked out for the stuffed owl dont try to name it after you gave the damn thing to me
TG: well then good luck
TG: if hes anything like john youre gonna need all the fucking ironic luck you can get your hands on
TT: John? Is that your boy-toy's name?
TG: boy-toy?
TG: dude he is not a boy-toy
TG: hes my friend
TG: my derpy friend who has been claiming no homo since i started talking to him
TT: Well, he sounds so interesting, but I'd rather go back to talking to English. Peace.
-TT ceased pestering TG-
-back to the present DUN DUN DUN DUN!~-
GT: So you made a time machine with a younger version of your older brother who somehow came into contact with you through a time paradox just so you can come back in time to see me?
TT: Yeah, pretty much. ◥▶◀◤
GT: Wow im... im flattered strider
TT: I'm sure that proves my feelings for you and that it's not just some irony thing.
GT: I would say so as well.
GT: I never thought anybody would go to such lengths just so see me.
GT: Thank you dirk.
TT: No problem, bro.
TT: Just give me a time I can come by.
TT: I'll be there. ◥▶◀◤
GT: Well if you dont mind watching tomb raider with me you can come over right now if you really want to.
TT: . . . Not so keen about the show, but I do really want to see you.
GT: You can always come over after the movies over.
TT: . . . Yeah, I'll do that. . .
GT: Ill be sure to message you when the film is done then!
TT: Cool, bro.
-TT ceased pestering GT-
-about two hours later-
-GT began pestering TT-
GT: Hey strider!
GT: The movies over so you can come over now if you want to.
TT: Cool.
-TT changed his status to offline-
Ayazi: Yes, I am mean.
Dirk: Just let me see my goddamn boyfriend already that I've had a crush on sin- -ahem-
Jake: Since when, Strider?
Ayazi: -ducttapes their mouths shut- I'm sure you two will love to talk about this IN THE FIC.
Dirk: -rips duct tape off- right. . .
Jake: Remember, good people, REVIEWS MEAN MORE FIC.
Dirk: And you all better review. I want to see Jake.