Short one b/c I'm getting back in the game. Took a leave of absence from all writing but manga has gotten me stoked to write again (you can thank Fairy Tail – for which I'm planning to write an OC/Laxus).

Disclaimer: In which Stiles is in a coma, the holiday season has passed, and Derek's hope has run dry. At this point, I actually don't know if Stiles is actually going to reawaken or if it's going to be Derek's spiritual awakening after the death of Stiles. Or something.

DSD # 44 – Reawakening

"It's already January 8th, Derek. I know we said we'd wait until Christmas and then New Years, but now... there's no more miracles, Derek," Sheriff Stilinski said with a blank glaze over his eyes. Derek felt anger well up from under him and he teetered on the edge of yelling at Sheriff Stilinski, screaming obscenities at him for abandoning Stiles and pulling the plug. But as Derek's head snapped up to meet the gaze of the sheriff's, for first time since coming to the hospital, Derek realized how pronounced Sheriff Stilinski's wrinkles were. The sheriff looked as though he had drowned in the depths of hell and only duty had kept him walking rather than putting a gun to his head.

"I – I just... thought," Derek stammered slowly, "It was Christmas and Stiles was the only one who still kinda believed in Christmas miracles so – I don't know."

"So, we kind of believed in him to wake up on Christmas. With a huge yawn and ask where his presents were, right?"

Derek nodded bitterly, and Sheriff Stilinski closed his eyes as if he could picture it behind his eyes. A chocked hiccup caught both of them off guard and both turned to Stiles in anticipation only to realize that the sound came from one of them. With slow resignation, both met each other's gazes, sharing a moment of longing and hopelessness.

Sheriff Stilinski broke the silence first, "I suppose we should decide before school lets out and Scott and the rest of the pack comes," Derek nodded silently, "You know, I never expected them to continue to visit after the first few weeks. I just assumed they'd come and then drift off the way kids do when they get bored."

"Pack is pack," Derek replied with a broken grimace, turning to Stiles, Didn't you hear that Stiles? Pack is pack, so where are you?

"They'd say 'no' especially Scott," Derek continued, I'd say 'no' too.

"I'd agree with Scott," Stile's dad breathed, "... And then Stiles would be here, in a hospital, growing old without ever growing up. We'd be damning him for us. And God knows I've said this so many times that I'd never move on whether or not his body's here, but..."

"Yea..." Derek murmured, rounding the plastic hospital bed to reach Stiles' warm hand. He didn't sit down because if he sat, he knew he'd never leave and then he'd cry when nobody was listening and he'd be neglecting the rest of his pack, his very alive pack.

"I'm sorry, son," Mr. Stilinski said, laying his hand on Derek's shoulder. They'd become closer over the months to the point where Mr. Stilinski called Derek "son" as well.

"But I say no, we don't pull the plug," Mr. Stilinski continued. You'll have to decide was left unsaid.

"That's okay, Mr. Stilinski. You'd better not stay around because I might really do it," Derek grumbled and sat down in the chair already situated next to Stiles. The sheriff tucked his hat over his eyes, whispering "Good luck, son. I'll see you soon" and Derek wasn't sure if he was talking to him or to Stiles. And Derek wasn't sure if he wanted to loose a father figure yet. Not that Derek'd blame him.

Derek had had plenty of time to think. He'd had nine months since the doctors had said there was a 10% chance Stiles would wake up. He'd suffered crushing defeat when Stiles hadn't woken up from his coma on Christmas. On New Years Eve, after Mr. Stilinski had gone to get another cup of crappy coffee, Derek, drunk and feeling alone, had kissed Stiles' lips and contemplated suicide. He didn't for fear that the moment he died, Stiles would wake up. Looking at Stiles' comatose body, Derek couldn't help but think that Stiles would wake up like in the movies right at the last minute.

However, many 'last minutes' had already past. Maybe, really, Stiles' life had been all spent up and now they just had a breathing corpse. I'm like a good-looking paralyzed zombie, Derek could hear his Stiles say through laughter although Derek couldn't be sure that he got Stiles' laugh right. Derek thought of Stiles' laughter but it sounded empty in the cavern of his imagination. Yet, even the hollow laugh in Derek's mind felt substantial enough now as he held Stiles' hand that couldn't hold back. Stiles' hollow laugh rose from Derek's own throat and soon Derek was weeping without any physical tears. Instead, the tears in his heart were enough.

With Stiles' limp hand on his lips and a defeated spirit, Derek murmured, "I'm sorry, Stiles. I'm so sorry." Looking up from his broken form, Derek could swear he saw Stiles smile with forgiveness and love.

A/N: I know what happens to Stiles. Do you?

With stories, it doesn't matter what really happened and what didn't; I think what really matters is what, you, the readers think happened. Did Stiles really smile or was that his spirit or was that Derek's imagination? So did the plug get pulled? I love how Derek's decision (whatever it was) was redeemed by Stiles' smile – which was a reawakening of sorts, imaginary or not.

I almost cried while writing this, I swear. I'm glad I'm back.

Song of the Day: La Mar by The Beautiful Girls. I love pandora.

Word of the Day: Quondam meaning "onetime or former." As in Stiles' quondam life.

– Jan 8

Bye, mis bellezas. Have a wonderful year and wonderful thoughts. I love all of you whether or not the feeling is reciprocated because you are a person with individual thoughts and that, alone, is very, very important.