DISCLAIMER: I don't own Homestuck… NO SHIT!

== Submit to your fate

This is stupid.

You think with an inward grimace, as you are unwillingly lead by the arm into the (surprisingly menacing) "mini-hell-on-earth' that was known as Wal-Mart.

This entire thing is stupid.

"Lighten up Dave!"

"Fuck you Egderp."

Your Bro turns to smirk down at you and you glare right back at the asshole – or the Strider version of one, it was literally a single twitch of the eyebrow. "Don't even try to run Lil' man you know I'll catch you before you even get a solid meter."

"Well fuck you too. Why don't you go back home and have sloppy makeouts with English?" you say bluntly – of course you pay for it with a painful smack upside the head, but it was well worth the ridged posture your Bro took on as his muscles froze in place; oh and that look on his face for those 2.56 seconds (you counted) was fucking priceless. And OH so un-ironic at that… you almost consider just entering the Wal-Mart with no further complaints.

Almost.

"Why are we doing this? Why am I letting you make me do this? This is stupid… It's like… bro… this is like so fucked up on so many levels."

Jade beams up at you, eyes near shining (no, not even messing with you man. Fucking. Sparkling. Like crappy firecrackers on a dry 4th of July eve, ones that you'd just bought at the last second from a questionable salesman in a back alley – very much expecting duds only to be surprised as they lit up like motherfucking Christmas lights on – sorry you got off topic), if that girl were a dog, you'd swear her tail would be wagging right now… "Because its summer, we're all bored, and we need something to take our minds off of… um… the game… you know?" she says shifting from one foot to the other, you simply look off to the side only to turn your gaze back to the Wal-Mart when you realize: "Shit. My equally (if not MORE so) traumatized boyfriends to my right."

An awkward silence almost falls, but good old Lalonde saved the day of course.

"Strider, if I am correct didn't John 'convince' you until the wee hours of the morning yesterday?" your sister says, eyes never leaving her cellphone. "Do keep it down next time, the walls in that horrid shack of an apartment the four of us share are rather thin."

Your eye twitches. Did Lalonde count as a girl? Could you punch her? You faintly consider this, but you quickly shoot this thought down. Roxy, Bro, AND Kanaya would kick your ass if you went through with it. Plus Lalonde would gouge your eyes out with those nifty sewing needles of hers.

It wasn't worth it.

"And… you are officially all assholes. Get the hell away from me. You are no longer my friends." You say candy-red eyes glaring holes into Lalonde's behind shades.

She narrows her own purple eyes and smirks. "If I have to participate in this act of idiocy, so do you." You almost snarl – almost. That would be loosing your cool. Striders don't loose their cool.

"So you do admit this is stupid."

"Of course. This is really, truly, the stupidest act of human activity that we will most likely ever attempt – this week, maybe this month at the most." She adds on hastily.

Bro sets a hand on your shoulder, effectively making you cringe, "Yeah, this is stupid. But that's what makes it ironic."

…

Did you mention how much you hate these people?

"… So when are Jake and Jane showing their bucktoothed faces?" You get three slaps upside the head for that one. It was still worth it.

Still glaring slightly, your Bro answers, "They're waiting for us inside." He then gives you a Strider smirk, "So Lil' Man, are you ready to raise hell in this Wal-Mart?"

You allow yourself an inward groan, "There's no getting out of this right?"

"Not a chance in hell."

"Then bring it on. Lets get kicked out of Wal-Mart."

A/N: Something that isn't Hetalia…? LE GASP! THE HUMANITY!

*ahem* So yeah, I made my first Homestuck fanfic… Somebody shoot me… please…. Anyway, something to celebrate my graduating from middle school just last night and to kick off my summer =). Anyway, did I characterize everyone correctly :/… I… I'm really not all that sure… I just finished reading Homestuck and a bunch of character pages on the wiki site about a week or so ago… So I'm not really all that sure (by the way, that Jane/Jake/Dirk/Aranea thingy going on right now is friggin' gold lolz… XD…) Anyway, this is post!Game and the kids are… meh, sixteen-seventeen… Anyway, just for the hell of it, John is dating Dave, Jake is dating Dirk, Rose is (long distance wise) dating Kanaya, and Jade and Jane are our pretty little peacemakers =D. Well… not really… cause Jane and Dirk would still have that tension over Jake going on and IGUKADNFWOJNJANHCBVW! I'm trying not to think guys but FhjBBIWDUNCNJJDCNK anyway, I'll be uploading the other chapter later on today since its nearly done…

But seriously, why has nobody done this yet? Should I add in the trolls for kicks?

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Do review and tell me this doesn't such as bad as I think it is…