A.N. Somewhere along the way, I noticed that the voices of JJ and Diana sounded very similar, almost identical in quality. And that set the scene….

Her Voice

The call came in late afternoon, just after he'd refilled his coffee for the umpteenth time. As much as he didn't mind the reading, Reid preferred the challenges of the field to these long afternoons doing paper consults. He welcomed the distraction until he saw that the call was from Bennington.

"Dr. Reid? This is Dr. Norman from Bennington. Doctor, I'm sorry to do this on the phone, but I need to give you some news about your mother-and I'm afraid it's not very good."

Emily was the first to notice the change in Reid's mien and the way he sat, stiffly, knuckles white from gripping the phone so tightly. She caught the attention of her colleagues.

"Very early this morning, Mrs. Reid suffered a seizure, focal to the left side. She was transported to Las Vegas Memorial for evaluation. The doctors there would like to speak with you as soon as possible. I can give you the number."

Reid ended the call and punched in the numbers for Las Vegas Memorial. Dr. Carson came on the line promptly.

"Dr. Reid, thank you for calling me so quickly. As you probably know, your mother had a focal seizure this morning and was transferred here from Bennington. I understand she's been treated there for schizophrenia. I need to ask you if she has ever had a seizure in the past, or ever had a CT scan or MRI." At Reid's negative responses, Dr. Carson continued, "We performed a CT scan with contrast. It seems she has a large mass in the left parietal area. The contrast showed it to be very vascular. We think she may have started bleeding into it, causing the seizure. And we're very concerned she could have a much more serious bleed imminently."

Reid's mind was racing. Seizure…..tumor….bleeding…..Mom. "What-what does it mean?"

"It means that her life is very much in danger, Dr. Reid. If it's at all possible, I think you should come immediately."

"Of course, I will. Is there an option for surgery?"

"With the size and the vascularity, I'm afraid not, Dr. Reid. The best we can offer is the hope that radiation might shrink it a bit. But I have to tell you that lesions this size, and with this much blood supply, are usually fatal within days to weeks. I wish I could give you better news."

Several beats later, Reid responded. "Thank you, Dr. Carson. I know that wasn't easy. I'll be there as quickly as I can. Does she know?"

"She is beginning to stir, but hasn't yet been alert enough to tell. The Bennington staff thought it might be best if they, or you, gave her the news."

Reid agreed. "They're right. Please don't let anyone tell her until I get there. I'll leave tonight."

The rest of the team had been blatantly eavesdropping on Reid's half of the conversation and were now staring at him, awaiting an explanation. From the looks of sympathy in their eyes, it was clear they'd gotten the gist of it. He gave them the rest.

"I don't know how long I'll be gone, guys. I don't think I'll be able to leave her until this is done…one way or the other." With that, looking both resigned and lost at once, he went to ask Hotch for an extended leave.

Morgan, Emily and JJ exchanged looks.

"I wish he didn't have to do this alone-he literally has no family for support- only us," said Emily.

Morgan replied, "But he's such a private person, I don't know that he would let us help him. You remember how he tried to hide it when he was investigating whether his father had been involved with murdering that boy. He was completely torn up, but still wouldn't ask for help. Rossi and I had to practically force him."

JJ had been quiet during the exchange. "I think maybe he would let me-at least if I didn't give him a chance to say no. He came to me when he thought Emily had died." Her voice trailed off as she remembered how devastated he had been-first by the "death" and then by the deception. "Let me talk to Garcia and see if she can wield her magic wand."

Reid settled into his seat by the window, already missing the ease of flying the BAU jet. He was lost in thought, in a distant time and place, moving between the memories of his mother in her best moments and her worst, and apprehensive about what would greet him in Las Vegas. He barely noticed when someone sat in the seat next to him.

"Is there room for one more?" The familiarity of the voice made him turn.

"JJ! What are you doing here?"

"I think It's pretty obvious. I'm flying to Las Vegas. I -all of us, really-thought you shouldn't be dealing with this alone. So Garcia made it happen, and even got me into the seat next to yours."

"But how can you go to Las Vegas? JJ, how can you leave Will and Henry? I don't want to be a bother to anyone, and I especially don't want you to leave my godson without his mom."

JJ looked off to the distance. The moment had come to share a truth she'd been reluctant to acknowledge.

She began with a sigh. "There's something I haven't told you, Spence. I've told Penelope, but sworn her to secrecy. I guess you may as well know too." She shifted in her seat to face him. "Will and I aren't together anymore, Spence. There were just too many differences to overcome. In retrospect, I guess I always knew it would end this way-there was always something that kept me from agreeing to marry him. Eventually he reached the same conclusion. We're friendly, just not romantic."

He noticed that she looked only a little sad-more resigned, really-and weary. " He's gone back to New Orleans. Henry is staying with me, but right now he's visiting Will's family."

Reid studied her in stunned silence. Somehow she'd kept this to herself and he hadn't even noticed. What did that mean about their own relationship? Once they'd been very close, but lately there had been some distance. The whole thing with Emily had definitely put a filter between them in terms of what they shared with one another. He'd missed her, even though he saw her almost every day. And now, here she was, prepared to accompany him on the most difficult journey of his life, while she was on one herself. He decided it was time to dissolve any barriers that remained between them.

Reid considered his next statement carefully. Clearly he needed to support JJ, but he was also worried about her-and especially about Henry. The childhood he'd lived was stuck in Reid's consciousness.

"What will that mean for Henry, if he doesn't see his dad all the time? JJ, my dad left my mom and me alone, and look what happened to me."

She looked at him with a patient smile. "Spence, what happened to you is that you became a caring, compassionate man who has dedicated his life to helping others-what more could I want for Henry?"

"But JJ, you don't know what it was like. Granted, my mom suffered a mental illness, and that flavored everything that happened. I virtually raised myself from the time my dad left. I wouldn't want that for my godson."

At that, tears sprang to JJ's eyes. "Ever since I've been a mother, the one thing I've hoped for is never to hurt my son. I've cried and prayed and lost countless nights of sleep over this, Spence. I wish Will and I could really make a life together, but I know it wouldn't work. And as painful as it is to end it, and to think of what it might do to Henry, I think it is for the best. I think it would be worse for Henry to grow up with two parents who really haven't found themselves able to love one another."

He held her gaze. "I'm so sorry, JJ. I wanted more for you. You deserve more." He added, "I'll be there for Henry-and for you-in any way that you need. Babysitting, trips to the museum…I'll even learn how to teach him baseball…..if it will help."

That last brought more tears to her eyes. "I'll take you up on that, Spence. Maybe not the baseball"-she said looking at him askance-"although that would definitely be fun to watch." And they both smiled.

She continued, "Anyway, it's made it possible for me to go with you to Las Vegas, so I guess it's not all bad. The thought of anyone having to face the prospect of losing a parent alone is too hard-I especially would never want it for you."

She reached for his hand and, uncharacteristically, he let her take it. As he closed his fingers around hers, he turned again to the window and visited his own thoughts.