I know I already posted a chapter today; but I hate to say it but… this is the ending of book one of the Forever Mine saga. Don't worry; Nessie and Jacob have plenty more adventures in this saga.
I want to thank all the readers who have liked, loved, reviewed, read, my story. I can not say enough on how thankful I am for all of you! You make me want to do this more.
I may post the new story up soon; but I don't know yet… We'll see.
What was your favorite part of the story?
Enjoy!
You can sink to the bottom of the sea… just don't go without me.
~The Civil Wars~
Chapter 24
Nessie's point of view
I drove into the garage; coming from Abby's house.
I heard a piano playing. It couldn't be Daddy. He and Momma went last minute Christmas shopping. I knew it wasn't Grandpa or Jasper because: they, and Emmett went to show Nahuel how to live our lifestyle.
I knew it couldn't be Aunt Rosalie either; but who could it be?
Jacob? Since when can he play? I snuck in.
"I could lean in to hold you; or act like I don't even no you… seems like you could care less either way. What happen to that girl I used to know? I just want us back to the way we were before…" As I listen to that song; I knew he was talking about us.
We've pulled apart. Maybe I'm being selfish? Maybe I should let him go until I've matured?
I clapped; as Jake turned around shocked. I guess its because he thought he was alone; and nobody would hear him.
"I didn't realize you were there." Jake said getting up; and rubbing his neck.
"No, don't let me stop you. You play amazing. Continue."
'Nah, I've got patrol anyway."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Tell you what?"
"That you're a man of many talents." He shrugged as I gave him a quick kiss. I gave him another kiss; trying to clear up the awkwardness between us.
"I…really…do…have…to go." he said between kisses. I guess it's me; but I feel like a rollercoaster.
I huffed; and let him go. I walked upstairs; and plopped on my bed. What Jacob was playing hit home. Did he really feel like that?
I started to wonder about those things; when I heard pebbles hitting my window. I smiled. At first I thought it was Jaocb; but then I smelt the air. Nahuel.
"Nessie, could you let me win please?" Nahuel asked. I opened my window.
"You know you could have came through the front door," I said.
"I know. I'm leaving tonight; and I wanted to have a proper good-bye." he took my hand. I started to feel uncomfortable.
"Nahuel…" I took my hand out of his.
"Renesmee, I know it's a little bit early to give a Christmas present; but I would like to give you this early." I smiled and shook my head yes. He leaned in; and before I knew it, his lips touched mine! Soft and sweet at first; but then fierce and strong! And the bad part about it was that I kissed him back!
I pushed him away; and slapped him across the face.
"How dare you! I'm with somebody!" I shouted.
"I know; but Nessie, I am more like you. We belong together. I know we barely know each other; but I feel like I've known you for centuries. I love you Renesmee; and I know you love me too. You second guess yourself with Jacob. You-"
"My love life is none of your business. Quit lying to yourself that you love me; and that I love you! We are not meant to be! I am meant to be with Jacob. I. Love. Him. And only him!"
"No Nessie, you need to stop lying to yourself. You're such a good liar; and now you're starting to second guess yourself… I'll write." Nahuel said trying to kiss me again; but I turned my head.
He kissed me on the cheek instead; and jumped out the window. What have I done?!
I kissed Nahuel; while I'm with Jacob. That should be Jake's lips on mine! Not his!
I noticed a few tears slipped down my face. NO. I can't cry! Not now! I need to leave as little evidence as possible. Jake can't know.
I went to the bathroom and turned on the faucet; thinking I could rub that kiss off of my lips. That was a stupid idea. Instead I splashed water on my face.
Jake can't no. Nobody needs to know what I've done. WHAT HAVE I DONE?"
~~~FOREVER MINE~~~
Wednesday
I was sitting in the window still in my room watching the snow fall; thinking little about the kiss.
Everybody knew I was hiding something. Even Jacob.
He kept coming up her asking if I was okay. I hated lying to him.
It was snowing hard. Today was the day before Christmas Eve. I should be down there with my family. Watching Uncle Emmett around hanging mistletoe above our heads, daddy playing the piano. Just celebrating. And Christmas was my favorite holiday too.
My family would try and get me to come down; but I rejected their offer. Thinking little about everything that happen yesterday.
"Hey." I heard a husky voice say. I smiled weakly at him.
"Are you okay?" Jacob asked.
"I'm fine." I lied. He didn't look convinced.
"Really? Is there something you want to tell me?" Jacob said picking up a photo frame with a picture of me and him.
"No." I said shaking my head quickly.
"Are you sure? You know you can tell me anything." He walked over and sat on the edge; across from me.. Jake took my hand; and stared me straight in the eye. I had to look away.
"That's when I know your lying: when you don't look me in eye. He said sounding hurt.
"Well, can I ask you an question? And I want an honest answer.: He sounded really hurt; but his voice also sounded cocky.
This wasn't his normal joking, loving matter. This is the tone of voice sound like the Jacob I knew and loved. This man scared me. Like he wanted to go on a mad rage; or something. This mad wasn't my Jacob.
"Anything."
"Promise?"
"I promise." He leaned over; his mouth only an inch away from my ear.
"Who's a better kisser: me or Nahuel?" I gasped. He knows!
"YOU! It will always be you!" I said getting up starring him directly in the eye.
"Are you sure?" I was angry now. He didn't believe me!
"Why don't you believe me! Jacob! He doesn't love me; and I don't love him! He's just lying to himself!" I shouted.
"Maybe he's right though. Maybe you're lying to yourself. You are a goof liar." he snapped back.
"How do you know?"
"Before he left he said: he had a couple points higher than me. That and I seen the whole thing." I stayed silent.
"What? You weren't planning on telling me? You should really practice what your preach Nessie." He was right.
"Just tell me one thing: do you love him?"
~~~~FOREVER MINE~~~~
After several minutes of us shouting at each other; Jake had to leave. I knew he was going to phase; but I couldn't get his hurt phase out of my head.
"Why do you keep pulling away from me?!" That's when I said it. I didn't even mean them. It was like somebody put them in my brain; and made me say them.
"BECAUSE I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE!" Once I said them; I instantly regretted them.
"But you said-" Jake's face was shocked and hurt; but my big mouth kept going.
"I'm a good liar. It's in my blood." I realized what I said.
"OH MY GOD! Jacob, I didn't mean that! I don't know what came over me!" I took a step towards him; but he took a step back, and flew out the window.
Now I was sitting here. Figuring out what happen. I knew I should go after him; but we both needed the time and space to think.
My family came up and tried talking to me; but I kicked them out.
Out of aggravation; I grabbed a picture frame that was the closest thing to me. I threw it against the wall.
The glass shattered; and there was a dent in the wall. But I didn't take notice as I realized it was the photo Jake was holding before. God, I'm an idiot!
I heard my phone go off. I walked over to it; wiping tears away, attempting to compose myself.
"Hello?" I answered with a shaky voice.
"Yes, may I speak to Renesmee Cullen?" a woman asked.
"This is her speaking. Who is this?" I asked politely.
"This is Judy Michaels from Julliard. Your application for the six months early student program has been accepted. Meaning-" Application? I never sent in an application. I didn't even want to go to Julliard.
"I'm sorry; but I didn't send in an application. And I wasn't planning on it!" Before she could say anything else; I hung up. I couldn't believe somebody in my family would do this?! I dashed downstairs; clutching my phone the whole way.
"I know you heard the conversation; so who was the idiot who did this?!" I looked around the room. I noticed Aunt Rosalie was looking down guilty.
"You did this?! Aunt Rosalie? How could you!? Did you even think to put my feelings into consideration?! No! Because my family loves to make those decisions for me!" I yelled.
"Renesmee, we are suppose to know what's best for you. Your still just a child; and we want you to have a safe normal life." Momma said calmly. I was getting tired of her crap.
"Mother, just shutup. Stop acting like you had the safe and perfect life." I snapped. Momma looked at me with hurt shock.
"RENESMEE. CARLIE. CULLEN. APOLOGIZE NOW. You need to calm down." Daddy scolded. The rest of the family was starring at me. Maybe it was because I looked like a mad woman; and needed to go to the nut house? Anywhere was better than here.
"CALM DOWN? CALM DOWN! WHY DO I NEED TO CALM DOWN WHEN I HAVE: AN UNCLE THAT CONTROLS MY EMOTIONS, AND A FAMILY THAT THINKS THEY KNOW WHAT'S BEST FOR ME! YOU'VE NEVER BEEN IN THE PREDIACMETN I'M IN. YOU'RE NOT A CREATURE OF IT'S OWN KIND! YOU'RE NOT A HALF BLOOD FREAK! SO HOUW COULD ANYBODY UNDERSTAND? MAYBE BECAUSE MY FAMILY WANT'S TO CONTROL ME? HMM? ISN'T THAT JUST WONDERFUL?!" I shouted as loud as I could.
"Get your act together young lady; or we will ship you far away-" Momma started; but I cut her off.
"OH, SO YOU AND FATHER DEARSET CAN HAVE MORE ALONE TIME? AND I'D RATHER BE ANYWHERE; THAN HERE WITH YOU PEOPLE." I shouted coldly.
Just then I felt Momma's hand come across me face. Tears filled my eyes; as I touched the spot she slapped.
"Oh! My! God! Sweetie, I am so sorry." Momma said taking a step towards me. I took a step back; shying out of her touch. I can't believe she did that?!
"I HATE YOU! I HATE ALL OF YOU! I WILL NEVER SPEAK TO ANY OF YOU AGAIN; AND I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU." I ran out the door; and to the woods.
I was shocked my family didn't come after me. They didn't care. Now I've lost everything.
~~~~FOREVER MINE~~~~
I ran for hours and hours; before I stopped. I knew I was far enough away from everybody. I didn't even care where I was.
I reached a clearing that had a stone wall blocking my view; and it looked to go on for several miles. I finally broke down and cried.
"You have took our bait." I heard a British voice say. I turned blonde female and two big burly males. I knew who these people were: the vampires that kept coming back for months; waiting for an opportunity like this.
"I guess so. Go ahead. Kill me." I said standing up; holding my hands out. The biggest one pushed me against the stone wall.
"Let me give you a short lecture; then we will get on with it. My name is Hailey. My talent is: I can put dreams into your head; and then take them out. When I do: you won't remember a thing."
"This is Marcello. He can mess with your sense of smell. He can make your scent disappear too. So he's made sure nobody will come to your rescue. If they care enough. Last but not least: Akken. He can make you say things that you regret. He can make you say lies; and actually believe them."
"My mate Aspen was destroyed by your "family", your mate and his pack. He was an allusion list That's why everybody thought you died; but you didn't. Since someone very close to me was destroyed; I think it's time to get revenge." They now stood before me. That was them who made me do all this stuff for the past few months! From the nightmares to now.
It hit me that I was going to die. Nobody cared enough to come after me. I was on my own.
Hailey grabbed me by the neck; and dragged me against the stone wall. I knew for starters I had a head injury.
Hailey put pressure on my stomach; as she dragged me higher and higher off the ground. I felt my ribs crack as I fought.
I had to do something. I wasn't going down without a fight.
Hailey then slung me across form her; and I flew like a rag doll. I hit the ground hard; as the breath was knocked out of me. I tried to get up; but Marcello put his foot on my knee, and laid pressure. I screamed in pain as my knee shattered.
I believed everything they said.
I was a monster. I didn't deserve to live. I screw up everything. I pushed away everybody for my selfishness. I deserved to die. Nobody cared about me. I don't have anybody.
I knew I was going to die.
~~~~FOREVER MINE~~~~
It felt like hours since my encounter with: Hailey, Marcello, and Akken.
They got what they wanted; and I gave up trying to beat them.
I was so broken; that I didn't have the will to fight anymore. I couldn't breathe; so why not give up. I was dying anyway.
God, I was in so much pain! On a scale of one to ten; I was defiantly a ten. It was so bad; I begged them to kill me. Finish me off then.
"Please." I pleaded. Next to the pain; I think the not being able to breathe was worse.
"Don't worry. You wish will be granted soon." Akken said. He was right. I was either going too: bleed to death; or they were going to finish me off here. Probably let me have the most slowest death as they could find.
"I'm sorry." I showed everybody I loved. I then let a few tears fall; admitting defeat.
They won.
I hated to loose; but what good was it when you don't have the will to fight anymore.
I know it doesn't sound like me. To admit defeat. To give up as simple. To give up was simple. I never knew how simple and easy it was.
How could I fight when I was: a half vampire with no fighting skills? How could I: when I caused the people I loved; pain, sorrow, and heartbreak?
I deserved this. I was a monster. Causing destruction in my path,
Jacob didn't deserve me as a soul mate. Momma and Daddy don't deserve me as a daughter. Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper didn't deserve me as a niece. Grandma and Grandpa didn't deserve me as a granddaughter. Abby and Karli didn't deserve me as a friend. The pack didn't need to take me in as one of their own. A their sister.
I hope that when I'm long gone; the people I loved and cared about, would finally happy, safe life. No me to screw it up.
Hailey sat down on my stomach; and put her hands on my throat. For some reason I didn't know.
It was getting harder and harder to breathe. I had to accept the fact that I was going to die.
~~~~FOREVER MINE~~~~
Jacob's point of view:
I couldn't believe Nessie said that!
I felt like I was being punched in the heart, and acid poured on top of it.
I phased back to human. I couldn't handle the voices in my head telling me: she didn't mean it, it just happen. I wanted my head to myself.
I stopped; sliding down against a tree. I couldn't think straight. How could this be possible. I leaned my head back; trying to figure out… well, everything.
"I'm sorry." I looked up. It sounded like my Nessie was right beside me.
"Nessie?" I stood up; hoping she was there. Something deep inside me felt something was wrong.
Something made me want to go north and start running.
The snow was getting heavier and heavier; thicker and thicker on the ground.
This all felt too familiar.
Us imprinters only feel like this when our impritee's… dead!
Then it hit me: the bloodsuckers attacked; and I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself, while something was going on with my Nessie!
No! She can't be dead!
I started running north; not thinking about phasing. I only had my mind on one thing: Nessie.
"I'm coming baby!" I thought hoping she would hear me.
I seemed so far away; but smelt blood. And a lot.
"Please hold on Nessie! I'm coming!" I shouted. I didn't care if she love me. I didn't care if she loved Nahuel. I didn't care about anything! All I cared about was getting to my angel. I loved the girl who made my life whole.
I never knew she could do that. Chang me life. She made my life better. I don't know where I would be without her. I take everyday for granted with her; and now I might not have anymore with her.
I came to a small clearing; when I stopped. I saw a stone wall that was covered in blood. I looked down. Nessie was there; and wasn't moving! NO!
"NESSIE!" I shouted rushing to her.
"Jacob!" she barely choked out?
"I'm right here. Stay with me now! Don't go to sleep." I said cradling her head in my hands.
"They…lies…you…" she rambled.
"I know. You can tell me later though okay?" she relaxed as her eyes closed. No… she can't be.
"HELP! CARLISLE! EDWARD! SOMWBODY PLEASE!" I screamed as Nessie's breathing became labored.
"Please Nessie! Don't leave me! You don't like to loose; you're a fighter remember. Don't do this! Don't leave this family." I begged my voice shaky.
She opened her eyes again; and put her hand on my cheek. I looked deep into her eyes. They weren't full of life; but full of pain, regret…just lifeless compared to the other times I've looked at them.
"My Jacob. I really do love you. Tell my family that I love them. I'm sorry-" Nessie showed me; but I cut her off quick. She can't do this. She dies; I die.
"No! You are not doing this. We'll get you to Carlisle; and everything will be okay. Just please don't leave me!" I shouted in her face. Nessie went unconscious then.
I heard the Cullens and a few of my pack come. I let out a small sigh of relief.
"See Nessie, you're going to be okay. Everybody's coming." I said mostly to myself.
Nessie's labored breathing stopped.
"NO!" I put my hands on her chest and put pressure; then put my lips on her mouth, breathing air into her. Nothing happen. I did it again. Nothing.
"Please no." I begged to whoever could hear me.
Renesmee can't leave me! No, not like this! She was Forever Mine!
I will make sure of that!
~~~~FOREVER MINE~~~~