I'm here to clarify something to everyone.

Ever since I have been 'romantically associated' with Nerdtron, people have been taunting us, judging us, and assuming things about a relationship they know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about.

Now, if I ever hear anybody say these things, I assure you that they learn their lesson the hard way. When you take on Cindy Vortex, you take on a black belt.

However, it seems I am unable to control what goes on when I can't hear it. So I'm going to let you all in on the truth.

HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND.

And, even if he were, I have a more important rumor to dispel. I have had people come up to me and congratulate me on my 'boyfriend'. Before I knock them unconscious, they usually say something along the lines of: "He's so smart. You're lucky to have him."

HA. HA. HA.

As if.

If anything, Freak Boy is lucky to have me. I mean, seriously, people. I have a black belt, speak six languages, paint still-lifes, sing, dance, act, play piano, train dogs, tutor children, volunteer at homeless shelters, and I'm at the top of my class. If you don't count fudge-headed dweebs, that is. I certainly don't. And I do it all managing to look like, if I may say so myself, a very put-together young lady.

And people still say I'm lucky to have him?'

What does he have that I don't?

He's arrogant, short, un-athletic, lacking in any creativity, condescending, short-tempered, stubborn, and naïve. So, he may have the tops spot at school. That's all he has going for him!

Well, besides his blue eyes… and his smile…

Forget that, though. Not like it matters.

I mean, really, who would want Frankenhead as a boyfriend anyway? He's only trouble. With all the explosions, bad guys, and inventions gone haywire – who wants to deal with that?

Though, it was always exciting…

Anyway, getting off topic. The point is no girl would want him. I mean, I guess if they find geniuses with soft auburn hair attractive… Well, they had better not, because he's my –

My problem, okay? NOT BOYFRIEND. HE IS MY PROBLEM.

SO BACK OFF! With all the rumors, I mean. He is not my boyfriend and if he were, he'd be the lucky one.

I've got to go to the lab – I mean, library – to pick up some… books. So just remember what I said. If I hear anything differently from anyone, they'll have to answer to me. I've got a deli serving knuckles sandwiches all day long.