Chapter 1: May I never dream of impediment!

Warnings: This fic is Rated M for violence, language, and sexual material of the homosexual variety. If this doesn't fly your kite, then you should press the back button on your browser.

Disclaimer: I do not own Inception. If I did, it would not be nearly as amazing, because I am not Chris Nolan. Enjoy!

Kay had a quiet childhood. She was born in east London to a loving mother and father who had been married for three years before their little girl. Her mother died two years later, and her father met an American replacement a year after that. Kay couldn't be mad at age three, but the new man in her life was nice and smiled a lot and picked her up from pre-school, so he was okay. Their trio became four six months after matrimony, adding a brother her age named Roy. They liked each other and grew up nicely, all their needs fulfilled. Now, her best friend, aside from Roy, is named Lauren, and she has a St. Bernard named Jupiter. The small family of four just wants to visit Rome for Kay's fifteenth birthday.

Or at least that's what they told immigration.

In reality, Kay had a rough childhood. She actually has no idea what her age is, and met Roy three months ago. He's twenty three, but he's short and blonde, so he looks fifteen.

Eames isn't her father. He couldn't be further, really. The only part of that stupid story that was true was that Eames and Arthur are in a commuted relationship, but Arthur makes it too damn complicated for it to be a marriage.

It worked. Of course it did, it always does.

Five months ago-Mombasa.

"Eames." Arthur said the moment he answered.

"Hello darling." Eames smiled down the phone. "I told you I'd only be gone a few days, do you miss me already?"

"No... Well, yes, I miss you, but I need to tell you something." Arthur cut Eames off of whatever he was about to say. "It's urgent."

"What?" Eames asked, leaning forward in sudden interest. "What is it?"

"Do you remember Mr. Everson?" Arthur asked.

"The man from the bar in Costa Rica?"

"Yes."

"What does he want?"

Arthur paused.

"I swear to God Arthur, if you say inception I will catch the next flight home and kick your ass."

"He hasn't said, but it's a job."

Eames sighed. "That's terrifying." He considered what was being said. "Do we need a break?"

"You promised." Arthur said after a moment.

"You promised too." Eames wasn't happy, that much was clear to Arthur, even over the phone.

"Mixing business with pleasure was and always will be out of the question. We agreed that if this was going to work, we wouldn't." Arthur was tasting the grit of his own words as he said them again. It seemed like a lofty promise to begin with, but they agreed that if they were ever to be on a job together again, they wouldn't be involved.

"Do I have to move out?" Eames asked.

"Mr. Everson is based in Italy."

"I'll just share a room with Cobb then."

"Cobb's not in." Arthur let that sink in.

"Then we're missing a member. We can't do the job without-"

"I'm stepping into his position."

Eames sat still for a moment. "You're going to be... Then who's pointing?"

"I will. I can do both, Eames, I'm not a child."

Eames rolled his eyes.

Present day.-Italy.

"May I see your passport?" The olive skinned woman asked from behind the counter. Kay sighed, smiled, and handed it to her. "Kaitlyn Runner?" Kay nodded at the name. The woman shut the passport after another minute of working, then hands it back to Kay. "Welcome to Italy Ms. Runner."

"Thank you ma'am."

Four months ago- France.

"I'm back with Yusuf's concoction." Eames called into the warehouse.

"Good." Arthur said as he finished wrapping a cord around his arm.

"Where's Ariadne?" Eames set the case containing the somnacin on the floor.

"She's out. She's working on her undergrad."

"Fuck." Eames whispered. Arthur looked up and realized Eames was entirely too close. He had circled around the table and his hand was almost resting on Arthur's. "Where are we going to find someone else with her skill."

"Cobb may have found someone at the college." Arthur tried to remain calm.

"When do we meet them?"

"You can scope her out on your own." Arthur turned away from Eames.

"Arthur..." Eames stepped forward, again too close for Arthur's tastes. "We're in this together Arthur. We'll go visit together, alright?"

Arthur rolled his eyes. "Fine."

Present day-Italy.

Roy is not nearly as calm as Kay is going through immigration. He was sweating, his hands were shaking, and he stutters when the woman behind the counter asks him if his name is really Roger Runner.

Three and a half months ago- France

"Can anyone tell me the answer?" Cobb was even more authoritative now that he was a professor of a psychology class at the college.

None of his students answered. There were a few scratches of pencil against paper, which was probably the girls in the back passing notes, because he hadn't said anything of note yet.

Cobb tapped his pointer on the desk and coughed, but still no one answered. "Kay?"

He could see the girl in question from his spot. She popped her gum bubble and rolled her eyes. "Do any of the idiots in this class know?"

"Apparently not." He smiled slightly at her complete lack of respect for everyone in the room.

"There is no definite answer. It's perceptional." She popped her gum again. "Fucking idiots." she muttered.

Cobb tried not to smile at the girl as he dismissed the class.