Hey guys. Sorry it's been so long, life just catches up and at the minute it's hectic. I've something mega important on tomorrow that I've been working so hard on I've just not had the time to type this up until now. Please enjoy, if you're still following this story, and review too :-)

Chapter Forty-Two

My vision was dark, and I couldn't hear much from the blood gushing through my ears, though I could feel. I felt iron-clad hands grip my neck so tightly I thought I would pass out again; Kade's thumbs forcing their way onto my Adam's apple and cutting off my air supply as he threw me to the ground. I reached up and gripped his shoulders with my own hands, using all my strength to try and push him off me, a hard task when one is pinned to the floor under one-hundred and fifty pounds of muscle. "Kade!" I shouted, fear evident in my voice when my brain finally triggered that this was not at all like my brother. "It's only me, it's Peeta! Get off me!" I croaked, my vocal cords getting pushed aside as his thumbs delved deeper into my throat, his calloused hands beginning to twist.

Realising the danger, my body kicked into fight mode. I felt the adrenaline surge through my veins as my mustered all the strength I had. Years of wrestling with my brothers had left me with the advantage of knowing their weak spots, and all I had to do was put pressure on the back of Kade's knee, which was conveniently ticklish, and he would be overcome with laughter, a dirty trick that helped in many a situation. With the added energy of the adrenaline, I lifted myself up off the floor as Kade still clung to my neck, the wild glare in his eyes still there, though they still had the haunted sheen over them as if he wasn't really seeing anything.

Freeing my hand from the entanglement of our bodies, I swiftly cupped his leg and pressed into the right spot, earning a unprecedented scream from my brother as he spun off me and curled up on the floor, whimpering slightly. Shaking my head to free the fuzzy feeling that often accompanied lack of blood to the head, I steadied my shaking body on the side of Kade's bed, watching my brother as he rode out the last waves of his unseen torment.

"No...no!..NO!" Kade moaned as he finally woke up, his hand clamped over his heart as he sat bolt upright, panting heavily. "What..Where am..Peeta?" He asked, his voice deafeningly quiet as his eyes searched the darkened room, the only light seeping in from the hallway.

"I'm here Kade, you're at home." I whispered as I crawled over to him, and enveloped my now sobbing elder brother in a hug; thankful I had not seen what his mind had, yet wanting to see it at the same time, to see what scenes where tormenting him now and wanting to take them away from him.

I heard soft footsteps pad down the hall, a soft voice following, "Peeta?" She whispered as she entered the dark room and knelt beside us.

"Aidyn thought he left the stove on." I could practically hear my sister in-law roll her eyes. Although my brother had worked in a bakery for eighteen years of his life, and on and off since then, he still forgot simple things like turning off a stove or locking the front door at night. "So he was going to come back over to make sure, but I said I'd go instead, wanted the walk." This is why I liked Leesa. She didn't delve straight in with questions, she preferred to ease her way in. "I was downstairs and heard shouting?" She posed her statement as a question, allowing me to elaborate.

"I think it was a nightmare," I said softly, squeezing my brother's shoulder as his tears started to subside, a wet patch formed on my shirt. "He was thrashing under the covers when I came in and he uhh.. fell out of the bed, that's why he's on the floor." I told her, not wanting her to know the truth. I didn't think Kade even knew about his actions not five minutes ago.

She nodded, taking in the sight of my brother as he wept, his whole body starting to shake. "Here, take this and put it over him. He's probably in shock," She instructed me as she passed me the blanket from my bed, helping my wrap it around my shaking brother. "I'll be back in a moment," she said, a pensive look on her face as she left the room. I few minutes later I could hear cupboards banging and the soft whistling of the kettle.

"Peet?" Came the gruff whisper of my brother.

"Yeah, I'm here. You okay?" I asked, moving so I could see my brother's face. He looked exhausted, black bags that I had missed earlier hanging under his eyes as three weeks of little to no sleep caught up with him. His face was pale, paler than the flour in the kitchen below us.

"What happened?" He whispered, his voice shaking in fear.

"You had a nightmare. You kept moaning and thrashing in your bedsheets. I came in and..Then you curled up on your side and started screaming," I said as my brother peered at me, his eyes travelling down to my neck before they widened in shock.

"What's wrong with your neck?" He asked, his scared eyes meeting my own confused pair. Unless the bruises started to show already, for I knew there would be. "It's covered in brui.. Did I do that?" He asked, his voice dropping as he swallowed thickly, gripping the side of the bed-frame. I couldn't answer. I didn't want to tell him that yes, he had tried to strangle me to death. But I couldn't think of any other logical explanation as to why I had acquired these bruises. "Oh no.. Peeta I'm so.." He started, the sweat beading on his forehead as he visibly paled even more. "I think I going to be sick.." he moaned as he tried to stand.

Quickly jumping up to help assist my brother to his feet, he stumbled to the door in his haste to reach the bathroom, banging his shoulder and knee in the process. A few quick, uneven steps later and my brother could be heard retching as the contents of his stomach freed themselves. Grimacing, I went to leave the room when Leesa re-entered, handing me a tray containing a teapot and three cups, and a small tumbler already filled with a syrupy liquid. "I'll go, it's okay." She said as she turned on her heel and rolled up her sleeves, ready to aid my brother.

Setting the tray down on the small bedside locker between our beds, I fixed Kade's bedsheets and threw my blanket on top for good measure. I knew if someone was shocked, they were to be kept warm until their system adjusted. How did I know this? I had been Leesa's test dummy during that section, and many other sections, of her Healer training. For all the time spent being "treated" for various injuries and illnesses, I could become a Healer myself.

"Right, come on you, back into bed and keep warm." Leesa said softly to my brother as she guided him back to bed, easing him gently onto the mattress and covering him with a blanket. "Peeta, could you pour us some tea please?" She asked me, throwing me a worried look as she caught sight of my neck, her eyes bulging slightly. Pouring three cups of steaming liquid, I quickly glanced at my brother as he lay in bed. His ashen face peeking out from the covers, silent tears dripping down his cheeks, leaving wet paths in their wake. I passed one cup to her as my hand shook, slopping hot liquid over the skin on my wrist.

What if Kade never stops having these nightmares? What if, every night from here until the final day of his life, he wakes up terrified, a crying wreck?

Finally registering the pain of freshly boiled water as it fused with my skin, I hissed in pain. "There's a healer's kit in the bathroom, run water over the area, find some gauze and lift the ointment in the jar with the purple lid." Leesa spoke, her eyes not even flitting towards me as she helped Kade sit up to drink his hot beverage.

"Leesa! There's two purple-topped jars!" I called from the bathroom as I doused my wrist in cool water, rummaging through the kit at the same time. The woman had an obscene fascination with purple, beyond what I expected at her wedding, but even in her Healer's kit.

"It's the lavender coloured jar that I need, not the grape.." I heard her muffled reply, rolling my eyes. She even had names for them. Lifting the larger of the two jars, I returned to my bedroom, finding my brother sitting upright in his bed and Leesa sat next to him, her hand softly stroking his arm as she tried to calm him.

"Spread a bit of that over the scald and I'll put the bandage on," She said to me as I climbed up beside her, "Mind, though. It smells a bit strong," She said, indicating to the ointment. After the serum had quenched the pain on my wrist, her delicate fingers made nimble work of securing a long strip of gauze around the area, preventing infection.

"You seem to have been through the wars, little brother," Kade spoke, his voice quiet and raspy from misuse. "I heard about the tree-house incident, and the infection that followed, and the other burns.." He listed off, the ghost of a smile lifting his lips as he teased.

This was my brother, the one who found solace in my misfortune. Not the scared, nightmare-ridden boy I saw earlier.

"Yes well Mr Mellark, if I remember correctly you to have had your fair share of burns and infections in days gone by," Leesa chastised gently, smiling at his change in demeanour. I smiled too, happy to have my brother home.

"Ah Leesa, I was wondering where you had gotten too my love," Aidyn's voice carried from the door as he made his way to our shared bed. "I passed our father on the way here, a lucky woman by the name of Elsie should be expecting a visitor any time soon." He said knowingly, a small smile gracing his lips. " Seeing as you're oh so comfortably wrapped up between my brothers, shall we just stay the night?" He asked his wife.

The pure adoration that emanated from his features made my stomach churn a little. I wanted to be able to look at someone like that. Like Katniss. And I guess now I can.

"Did you look our door? And turn off the stove in our house? And close the bathroom window?" She asked, a teasing tone colouring her question.

"Yes love. Yes love. I can't remember love." My brother replied, his cheeks turning a slight shade of pink as he blushed at his forgetfulness.

Hours later, as I awoke from my slumber, I found we had all fallen asleep on Kade's bed; a tangle of limbs and heavy breathing. I gently stretched the kinks from my back and lay back down in a more comfortable position when I heard someone awaken.

"Peeta?" Kade whispered.

"Yeah?" I whispered in reply, worrying.

"I'm sorry." He said, his whisper wavering. I reached out and grabbed his hand in mind in a firm clasp, squeezing it gently.

"Don't be." I said, knowing nothing more needed to be said. A Few minutes passed before he spoke again.

"Peeta? You'll stay with me, won't you?" He asked, sounding as though he was falling into a slumber again.

"Always."

Bit short, but I'll update by Sunday!

Wish me good luck for tomorrow! :)