Disclaimer: The events that will transpire are intended to entertain you, the reader. If you feel that these events are highly unlikely or purely stupid, it's because it is meant to be. Hence why the genre is humor. In other words, don't be trollin'. Enjoy the chapter!

XVIII. The Baker, Fights to Win

"Now then, shall we begin, Mer?" the sultry voice of my butler asked, adding on to the nervousness I was already feeling. It was the day of the fight and he had blindfolded me, something I was not expecting out of him. Then again, he was always full of surprises. Even so, it did not stop my curiosity. I asked him why a blindfold was needed for this situation.

"Having your sight available to you would ruin the experience," he answered, voice smooth and unfaltering as he tightened the black cloth over my eyes. "Also, it will be twice as interesting."

"I never knew that you would be so interested in my safety, Sebastian," I replied sarcastically. Going up against a death god with a multi-bladed, whirring contraption was definitely dangerous enough. However, trying to fend him off while blindfolded was a whole other level of peril. I did have to open my big mouth when Sebastian confessed, did I not?

"I know that you're mostly devoted to the Young Master, so you can act whichever way you see fit towards me to continue making things…interesting for yourself," I had said. If only I had known that those words would come into effect in such a strange way. Sebastian deserved a woman who was willing to fight for his love. I suppose that could be true, considering that he was a fan of hard work and would gladly cater to whomever was lucky enough to possess whatever qualities he liked.

"You'll be fine, pet. Mr. Sutcliff's sight is as limited as yours, if you're worried."

Sebastian was counting on me to win this, even though I was sure that there was an increased chance of me failing this battle and possibly, forfeiting my life. I had faith in him, though-despite the irony in that statement. He would have not let me accept this challenge if he thought I could not succeed. I would definitely have to defeat the tramp who first laid claim to him, blind. If that redheaded rapscallion Grell Sutcliff won by some twisted fate, I would probably be forced to watch him molest Sebastian from beyond the mortal coil. Who knows? If I managed to still be alive, I would possibly die from the very thought of them being improper in my bed…

"Humph! Bassy is as good as mine if it's that pushy blueberry of a girl!" boasted the evil ginger. I knew there had to be a reason why I did not like him one bit.

"I'm afraid that the trouncing you're hoping to get isn't what I have in store, you harpy harlot!" I challenged harshly.

"Ooh, what did you say, you wanton wench!"

"Now, now," soothed Sebastian's voice, still close to me. "Save all that vigor for the actual fight. I wish you both the best of luck…mostly to the lady whose tenacity is unrivaled."

"Why, thank you, Sebastian~!" crowed the annoying death god. I did not waste my breath to dignify that with a reply. In the distance, I heard Lady Aubergine's voice. She wanted to be present, claiming that she was a sucker for battles to the death.

"How 'bout a good luck kiss before they start, Sebastian?" she suggested, making my hair stand on end. No! Definitely not! I did not want his lips to be defiled by that gender-confused simpleton's foul skin.

"There's no harm in that, is there? Excellent suggestion, Lady Cornelius," the butler praised. WHAT! I refused not being able to witness this. I lifted my blindfold a bit, only to feel Sebastian's hand on my wrist. "No peeking," he lightly chastised, winking at me. Just what was he up to? He lowered my blindfold back in place, tapping me on the nose. I heard his footsteps as they traveled in my opponent's direction. I cringed as he squealed in anticipation.

I tilted my blindfold again. Was he actually…? I watched as the black-haired butler leant towards Grell and gave the wild death god a kiss. No, those chocolate candies that come in the silver wrapper. I heaved a giant sigh of relief.

"What the hell am I supposed to do with this!" the self-proclaimed woman shrieked, stomping his foot.

"Surely, you know how to enjoy a delicacy such as candy, Mr. Sutcliff? Just put it in your mouth and eat it," explained my clever co-worker. Lady Aubergine laughed until I was sure she was going to die from suffocation. It was when Sebastian turned away from the angry diva that I decided to put my blindfold back on. Soon enough, I felt his hands on my shoulders as he gave me a real kiss. It was more incapacitating than empowering, but I was able to gain a strange strength from it.

"That was…powerful," I said, smirking when Grell let out a jealous cry.

"You don't even know the half of it," he replied suggestively.

The wind blew. It carried the scent of Grell's sickeningly sweet perfume and the sound of his Death Scythe. The battle started before I even realized. I brought out my sword to defend myself against the coming blow and braced myself for an impact that did not even happen. I cursed, trying to decipher which direction the death god was coming from. The whirring of his weapon seemed far off in the distance. Not from the left. Not from the right, the front or behind me.

It was above.

I thrust my sword upwards to counter the attack and I came to the conclusion that it was a foolish action on my part as my back met with the earth. The sound of the grinding of metal against metal ripped through the air while I struggled against the weight of my opponent combined with that of his weapon. Luckily, he relented once I aimed a kick to what I thought was his groin. Sadly, I was mistaken.

"How dare you hit my face!" he cried, revving the scythe up for another attack. I managed to get myself off of the ground, preparing myself once again. The battle fell into a familiar pattern I began to predict: Grell would charge at me, hell-bent on trying to cut my face to ribbons, I would dodge and try to get in a nice attack to fend him off. Things got even more serious once my sword finally snapped under the pressure of his scythe.

I cursed, rolling away in time to avoid its spinning blades. My sword proved its durability during the course of the fight, and I could only curse every time I tried to find a weapon on my person sufficient enough to take on a flailing mad death god. As I frantically searched, Grell cackled and continued his rapid assault. I kept on the defensive, though it did not save me from being unscathed. My arms were probably covered with cuts and gashes from when I nearly avoided being chopped to bits.

Suddenly, the whirring of Grell's weapon ceased.

He must have come to the conclusion that the sound of his weapon was easy to track. Impossibly, my heart started picking up speed. Where was he now? I was sure to keep myself from moving, so my ears would not be distracted by any other noises being made. Abruptly, the revving returned. It seemed to be coming from in front of me, so I jogged backwards…into someone's chest.

"Got you~!" sang Grell's voice, the blade of his weapon touching my neck. As soon as I thought my death was nigh, my soon-to-be murderer wailed. A puncturing noise was heard and I was sure that another presence has made itself known. "W-Will!"

Glad for the interruption, I removed my blindfold and saw a man that held a vague resemblance to someone I would rather forget.

"Honestly, I don't know why you sound surprised, Sutcliff," droned the brunet man, adjusting his glasses with what looked like shears. "You've been neglecting your work, as usual, and for what? Fighting a human girl, with demon stink on her?"

"Come to join the festivities, Mr. Spears?" asked Sebastian, suddenly at my side. Spears scoffed at the sarcastic accusation, his green eyes refusing to meet the eyes of his interrogator.

"Please," he huffed, grabbing Grell by the collar. "Overtime, Sutcliff. Come with me."

"But WILL~" whined the overgrown toddler. Feeling a bit childish myself, I stuck my tongue out at him as his wrangler dragged him back to whence he came. Sebastian rose an eyebrow at my behavior and I smiled bashfully, then realized I had no cause to celebrate.

"Technically, Grell won. So does this mean I won't-"

"Don't be ridiculous. Regardless of how this would have turned out, I would still do whatever I wish to you," assured the demon.

"Because you're one hell of a lover?"

Chuckling, Sebastian shook his head. "Because you're one hell of a treat."