A Great Escape

Chapter 20: Home again

Lanying slept fitfully, but at least it was something; after a panic attack, she normally didn't sleep at all. As the night progressed, half-formed nightmares reached out and snatched at her mind, but none seemed to be able to get a very strong grip. She briefly awakened several times, adrenaline pulsing through her, left with only a flash of memory about a dream that she couldn't quite recall. Each time this happened, her own exhaustion would take her down again before she had the chance to question her surroundings.

Because of how late she had been out, she didn't truly wake up until early in the afternoon. She was sore all over from about a dozen bruises she had accumulated when she'd collapsed, she had a pounding headache, and as she sat up in bed she didn't have the slightest recognition of the room around her…or of the bed, for that matter.

She massaged her temples gingerly, her fingers rubbing small circles on her forehead as she tried to piece together the events of the previous night. Her panic had been so strong that it had struck her mind like a bludgeon, eradicating much of the information in its path. She dimly remembered the slender furry creature who had broken into her house and chased her out of the window. She remembered running through the streets of Gongmen in a state of blind fear until a panic attack had finally caught up with her. And she remembered collapsing in the middle of the road with her adversary leaning over her, certain that in another moment or two, she would be unconscious or kidnapped or worse. And she remembered…

Shen appeared at the door to the room just as he had appeared at her side the night before, causing her to gasp slightly and flinch with surprise. "Ah, you're awake," he said carefully.

Lanying exhaled, trying to prevent her heart from palpitating again; her nerves were still shattered, and his sudden presence had sent another needle of fear driving into her chest. "Yes," she answered flatly.

He cleared his throat. "Are you feeling any better?"

"A bit." She scrutinized him carefully, remembering something else that had happened last night: the truth had come out and she'd learned that he had been playing her the entire time. But now that she was more lucid, her thoughts unaltered by anger or panic attacks, she couldn't help but think that something didn't quite add up. If Shen truly had no regard for her, then why had he come back and saved her from Ming? Why had he stayed with her during that horrible attack that her mind had mostly blacked out and tried to comfort her? After all, at that point she'd already known about his ulterior motives. She would have been going with him whether she'd liked it or not, and he hadn't had any reason to act like he cared about her anymore.

Had he?

Shen tentatively walked over and sat down on the bed next to her, making sure to preserve a fairly large space between them. "I didn't know what kind of shape you'd be in when you finally came to…how are you?"

"My head is killing me," she muttered, giving him a sidelong glance out of the corners of her eyes. "And I'm supposed to be mad at you, aren't I?"

"Um, yes, about that…" He sighed. "I wanted to talk to you. To tell you the truth, if there is any chance that you'd still believe it…"

"Well, I'm listening."

His eyes dropped away from her gaze as he wondered where to begin. "Well…I came to Gongmen at the request of the Masters Council, in order to help improve the city's defenses. On the first day I was here, Lady Xuilan showed up at the dormitory – that's here, by the way – and started threatening the council, and me. Masters Storming Ox and Croc decided to call in their political advisors in order to get rid of her. They were referring to your parents, of course, and that's how I first met them."

Lanying recalled that the day that her parents had come home announcing her arranged marriage, they'd been called away to discuss a "certain visitor" with the Masters Council. So far, what Shen had said matched up to reality. "Continue."

"They happened to mention their daughter who had panic attacks, and who they might be forced to send to an asylum soon if they couldn't find a good husband for her. It just so happened that I'd had a panic attack only the night before. I felt bad for this daughter, and I thought of a plan: I would pretend to be engaged to her so that I could take her home with me to the Valley of Peace, somewhere that she could be free to live her own life…"

She darkened a bit. "All right, so you took pity on their poor maligned daughter and decided to intervene. I would have understood that, so why didn't you tell me this before?"

He looked directly into her eyes, unflinchingly, and she didn't look away.

"Because then I met their daughter and saw what she was really like," he responded softly. "I saw how much potential she had, how intelligent and talented she was…how beautiful she was…"

Lanying made a quiet noise of surprise, but she didn't interrupt him, or break eye contact. No one had ever called her beautiful before. On the contrary, she had grown quite accustomed to her mother's complaints of how she never cared about her appearance, and how a proper lady should not allow herself to spend the day in baggy robes and covered in paint. She had always considered her features to be fine, but nothing spectacular, and certainly not particularly beautiful. It was doubly odd to hear such a word applied to her right now, while she was in a torn and dirty nightshirt and still visibly shaken from a recent ordeal, her plumage tousled and irregular from a night of restless sleep.

But Shen said "beautiful" as if he meant it, and he certainly looked as if he meant it…

"I saw that she needed emotional support," he continued quietly, "and what else could I do? I gave it to her. I tried my best to help her, and I thought I really would marry her – or rather, you. I thought that I really would marry you." He realized that during this little monologue he had been unknowingly leaning closer towards her, and now he realized this and scooted back shamefully, averting his eyes. "And I lost you because I never said anything about it. And that's the truth, whether you believe it or not."

She appeared to be contemplating this for a few moments. Finally she added, "And you saved me."

"Yes, but what does that change? Nothing." He narrowed his eyes bitterly. "I know that this isn't a fairy tale, where the dashing Prince Charming saves a lovely maiden, and she rides off into the sunset with him for no other reason than that. I still didn't tell the truth. I still ruined your life. And I still started off our relationship based on nothing but pity and wanting to take on a charity case."

"And despite all that, you still stayed with me while I was having a panic attack," said Lanying. "No one has ever done that for me before. They're usually afraid that I'm having a fit or that I'll infect them or something, and they just ignore me. You were the first person who's ever comforted me…so why did you do that?"

He shrugged hopelessly. "Because it was the right thing to do, I suppose. And…because I still care about you, no matter what you might think of me now."

She reached out and gripped his chin gently, turning his head towards her. Her hand was slightly tremulous, and he had the sense that she was stretching far outside of her comfort zone just to perform the simple action of reaching out and touching someone. She locked eyes with him.

"Thank you," she said.

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "For what? Saving you?"

"For caring about me." She swallowed, trying to arrange the words inside her head. "For so long, that's really been all I wanted…someone who cared about me. And all I wanted was to believe that you were that someone. If was quick to assume that you had been playing me, since people have done that to me before. But I can't ignore what's right in front of me." Her wings dropped down, and one of her hands landed atop his, but whether or not this was intentional neither of them could say. "You're telling the truth, and I believe you."

And then she kissed him.

Shen blinked, startled, as her parted beak wrapped around his, and she closed her fingers around his hand with a deliberate grip. His first thought was that this was a dream of some sort and that he might as well enjoy this while it lasted, and so of course he kissed her back, slipping a wing around her waist. This was a more passionate kiss than the first one they had shared, and it went on for several seconds longer. When they finally parted, both of them were slightly breathless, though not at all embarrassed. He became enticed by little inconsequential details, like the healthy color returning to her face and the way the shades of blue and green in her feathers set off the brilliant violet color of her eyes, and he knew that the moment was real.

"…after all this, you don't hate me now?" he asked when he finally found his voice again. "How is that possible?"

She shrugged. "It was only a little mistake…such things happen."

He wanted to tell her so many things just then. He wanted to tell her how glad he was that he'd started having panic attacks, because if they'd never happened then he never would have met her; he wanted to tell her that he was so glad to have someone who he hadn't wronged horribly in the past and didn't have to remember the monster he was every time they looked at him; he wanted to tell her that now he would make sure that he would get her away from here, and that she would have her great escape after all; and a part of him wanted to tell her that he loved her.

But all he said was, "Perhaps I should ask you properly this time…will you marry me?"

Lanying smiled coyly and replied, "I'll think about it."

And then they were kissing again, because she did not have to say "yes" or outwardly declare that she cared about him as much as he cared about her and that she was so glad that her parents had done one thing right by bringing the two of them together, just as he didn't have to say the L word in order for her to hear it in her head, and to know that it was true.

After all, there are certain things that simply don't have to be said.

…

It was all settled: Shen, Xun, and the soothsayer would be returning home the very next morning, and Lanying would be going with them. She went back to her parents house for one more night and spent that evening with a perpetual smile on her beak, thinking only of Shen.

Her mother had locked herself into the master bedroom and was refusing to speak to her daughter, but Lanying couldn't have cared less. She didn't give a damn about her mother anymore or what exactly she'd done to warrant the silent treatment – in less than twelve hours' time, she would be out of Gongmen City forever. For once, things were starting to go her way.

Time flew by in a state of euphoria for both her and Shen. The activities of the city seemed to melt away around them, so they never knew that at Gongmen Jail, Lady Xuilan and Ming had managed to pick the locks of their cells and overpower the antelope guards and were now on their way out of the province…at least, they didn't know that yet, because no one would discover the bodies until the next day. But for the moment that didn't affect their happiness, and the matter would wait until another day until its story could come to fruition, as well.

And soon enough it was morning, and the masters of Gongmen City were being thanked by their guests for their generous hospitality, while the servants carted off the visitors' things to the sampan boat waiting to take them home. As Shen watched this final flurry of activity, he found it hard to believe that his little adventure was finally over. He hadn't gone into the city expecting to come so far, and yet he was standing outside of the dormitory realizing just how much had changed.

The soothsayer waited beside him, smiling up at him. "Well, my dear, not only have you helped to protect your ancestral city, but you also helped a young lady in need and fell in love, of all things." She chuckled. "I never thought I'd see the day that I could say that. Nevertheless, I'm very proud of you."

"Thank you for coming here with me, Nana," he answered, smiling as he took a last look back at the dormitory. "I might say otherwise sometimes, but I really am glad that I have you around."

She laughed and gave him a love pat on the rear, which caused him to grow flustered and draw back a bit. "You know that you'll always have me around, my little one. After all, who else is going to keep you in check?" She grinned.

Shen had already done his final check of the fireworks factory, so the last thing he needed to do was go and escort Lanying from her parents' house, gathering her things so that she could come home with them and live in the Valley. As he headed off for this last errand, Xun approached the soothsayer cautiously. The wolf was smiling and relieved that they were ready to at last, but he seemed a bit perturbed, as his ears were hanging slightly low on his head.

"So, Shen got his girlfriend," he finally sighed, looking down. "I guess this means that things are never gonna be the same again."

"Things are changing all the time, Xun," responded the old goat. "But you and Shen have managed to stay friends for this long…somehow I doubt that this is going to be what finally separates you."

"Yeah…you're right," Xun admitted. He smirked a bit. "That stupid peacock needs me, whether he ever admits it or not."

…

Lanying was sitting on the front steps of her parents' house, surrounded by the crates of possessions that had once filled her room. She had said goodbye to her father (her mother still wasn't speaking to her, and she still didn't care) and was now waiting to leave with a combination of eagerness and trepidation. When she saw Shen coming towards her, she ran to him, not recoiling in the slightest this time as he swept her up into an embrace.

"Are you ready for this?" he asked her.

"As I'll ever be," she replied, offering him a slightly nervous smile. "We have a lot to do, don't we? What are we going to do about our wedding…and what is the rest of your family going to think about me? What – "

He hushed her, keeping his wings around her waist. "Let's just take things day to day for now." He cleared his throat, a little awkwardly. "I've never really done this kind of thing before…have you?"

"You mean, planned a wedding? Or been engaged?" She had to laugh. "No."

"Then we have a lot to learn, don't we? And we'll learn it together."

And they collected their things and headed off, looking like a pair of very young lovers who had just begun to realize how much more brightly the world shines when there is someone by your side.

Shen's great escape was about to end; Lanying's was only beginning. Neither of them was entirely sure where they would end up after this. But if there was one thing Shen had learned after his many misadventures, it was that trying to predict the future doesn't always work, because there is always the possibility of some sort of alteration. The most important time was now, and with Lanying by his side and his family waiting for him up ahead, he didn't have a single reason to be discontent.

And when the sampan boat sailed away and he was standing at the edge of the deck with a smile on his face, he was able to bid Gongmen City a silent goodbye in his mind. It didn't unnerve him at all anymore; there were no more thoughts of ghost towers batting around in his head. He had been born and raised here, and he had abused it and tried to conquer it – and now he had lent a hand in protecting it, even if its most of its residents never realized what he had been doing there.

But it wasn't his home anymore.

He stood there on the deck, feeling the sea breeze waft through his feathers. He thought about his past, and about the artifacts from his childhood nestled safely inside of one of the many boxes on the boat, and about his parents in their graves within the Gongmen City Cemetery of Nobles. He thought about his nanny, and Xun, and Lanying and Kurisu and Lady Biming and everyone else. He thought about Gongmen City, and about the Jade Palace, and he thought about so many things at once that it was as if he was actually thinking about nothing.

He sighed as he watched the jagged skyline of the city vanish over the horizon.

"I can't wait to be home again," he murmured to himself, "but this truly has been a great escape."

THE END

A/N - Thanks to my loyal readers, this has become my longest fanfiction ever, clocking in at over 50,000 words...and it's also become my most reviewed story on the site with more than eighty reviews. So I'm sure you guys would like to know, what am I going to do now that this is over?

I'm hoping to return and add at least a few more chapters to "White Hot Darkness," as well as start the sequel to this story, which will be less about Shen and Lanying and more about...some other characters. Don't worry, though, Shen and Lanying will still be in it. It will just be a different conflict than them and their relationship next time. For now, there are a few scenes of them in "The Song of Winter" so you can read that to hold you over.

I do have a lot of things to do and work on, but hopefully those other bits of writing will be up soon. If you've been reading this story from start to finish, I'd be very grateful if you dropped me a review giving me your feedback on the whole story. Tell me what you liked and what you didn't; all I ask is that you be constructive.

Until next time, au revoir!

~gothicorca1895