*I don't own KHR. If I did, Gokudera would've won the Ring match, Yuni and Gamma would've lived, Enma would be in the anime, and the anime WOULDN'T BE ON FRICKIN' HIATUS!
Summary: Primo looked over to his son with a sort of sadness as he released his hand and Tsuna gave a reassuring smile. G stood by his boss and gave Hayato a sort of warning look that said not to mess this up. Hayato merely looked at him with a defiant look and nodded. This was the day that the two of them were starting Mafia Preschool.
Mafia Preschool: Intro
"HAYATO, YOU BRAT, GET BACK HERE AND GIVE ME THOSE BACK!" G yelled out through the mansion. Usually, G would be calm and mellow, but not this time. Oh hell no.
Because somehow, his little, five-year-old, silver-haired adopted son snuck into the weapons hatch and stole half of the dynamite supply.
This would not end nicely.
"No way old man," The young boy yelled out while laughing cheekily. G ran through the open window towards the great hall where Hayato was running towards and managed cut off his little demon-son who was staring at him.
G stared in wonder at his son. The kid took half of the dynamite supply, which meant about 500 sticks of explosive shit. So where in hell was he carrying it? He just stood there with a demonic little smirk on his face, with not a single stick in his hands or bulging out of his pockets.
"Hayato," G said with an eerie calmness "where's the dynamite?"
"What dynamite, 'Kaa-san?" Hayato said teasingly.
A vein pulsed on G's forehead.
"I'm talking about the dynamite that you took out of the weapons hatch. The ones that you've been running with this entire time…" G said with his left eye twitching incessantly.
Hayato just gave a shrug. "I dunno."
Oh, the little prick was dead.
"Hayato…"
"Hai, 'Kaa-san?" Hayato asked 'oh so innocently'.
"COME HERE!" G yelled out, jumping for Hayato.
G found out at that moment that Hayato had hidden the dynamite under his clothes. How the brat managed to do so without any distortion, take them out in half a second, and light them without a lighter was beyond him.
Hayato somehow managed to take out the entire west side of the mansion in exactly 1.8 seconds, which landed him a spot in the Vongola Great Hall of Fame for Most Destruction to the Vongola Mansion while Under the Age of Ten.
{Tsu 27 Goku 59 Yama 80 Hiba 18 Muku 69 Chro 96}
Giotto visited G later that morning in the east infirmary.
"Hey G. I heard that Hayato has a knack with dynamites, huh?" Giotto asked teasingly while leaning against the doorframe.
"Shut up," G muttered, while glaring at the ceiling. Part of him wished that his other kid, Bianchi didn't go to that prestigious All-Girls Mafia Preparation School; at least she didn't blow up dynamite in his face. But at least now she couldn't terrorize everybody with her poison cooking.
Giotto continued. "G, I've been thinking, Tsuna and Hayato are old enough to start preschool…"
G shot up from the bed, injuries be damned.
"Are you insane! They are part of the Vongola Famiglia! They could get kidnapped or held for ransom or-"
"Don't worry G; Asari says that as soon as he lands in Italy after his flight delay is over, he'll enroll his own son. Knuckle's adopted kids are eager to go too, so he's going to start them off together with them. Hell, even Daemon and Alaude are sending their kids in for preschool soon, and I think the Simon Famiglia are enrolling too. Not only that, but Hayato has dynamite and Tsuna has his gloves and HDWM. And if that's not enough, it's that preschool."
G stared hard at his boss.
"You mean that preschool?"
"Yeah,"
"But isn't that where-"
"Yeah,"
"Won't there be-"
"Unfortunately,"
"Are you sure he'll-"
"Already called him,"
G stared harder.
"Fine; maybe with that Spartan-like preschool, Hayato will learn what it means to be a Mafioso." G muttered. Giotto smiled and pats his Storm Guardian's head good-naturedly.
"Alright G; right now Tsuna and Hayato are playing outside… Well actually it's more like Tsuna flying around and Hayato following him with Air Bombs…" Giotto said sheepishly.
G stared at Giotto before falling back onto the bed and pulling the covers over. "I was never awake and did not just hear that sentence…"
Giotto sighed. Although G was stiff, he did care about Hayato in his own way.
"Juudaime, Juudaime! You're it!" Hayato squealed out, using multiple Air Bombs to fly around with Tsuna flying after him.
"I'll catch you Hayato-nii!" Tsuna yelled out with a wide smile on his face.
CRASH!
…
"Tsuna, Hayato, what was that?" Giotto yelled out of the infirmary window. Behind him, G stared up at the wall with an unreadable expression before covering his face with a pillow in exasperation.
"Nothing, Papa…" Tsuna responded. "That Dying Will Flame Statue over the gardens wasn't expensive, right?"
Giotto sweat dropped.
"Don't worry, Tsuna. I'll call someone to fix that… Just be more careful with the other priceless ornaments outside." Giotto called out, making a mental note to get the statue looked at.
G sighed. "You spoil him too much."
"I know." Giotto sighed. "But I can't help it; he's my son, G."
G nodded before looking at the Vongola Primo suspiciously. "And why are you here, by the way…?"
"To visit you after you got your ass blown up by your own five year old son." Giotto said simply, dodging the objects that his right hand man was throwing at him.
"No, what I meant was," G started, "Aren't you supposed to be doing your paperwork?"
…
"No! Please don't make me go back, its hell!" Giotto cried out as his Storm Guardian proceeded to unceremoniously throw him out of the infirmary and back to his own personal hell which was to push papers in his dark, unwelcoming office.
"It's your job as a freaking Vongola Boss to take care of the goddamned paperwork!" G yelled out, breaking the fourth wall and using it to kick Giotto out.
Hilda, the poor, unlucky maid, was the one to see the tattooed boss literally drag a crying and whining boss to his office. She sighed and slightly wondered why her bosses had to be Mafioso. Oh well, at least the pay was good.
{Tsu 27 Goku 59 Yama 80 Hiba 18 Muku 69 Chro 96}
"Ne, Hayato-nii," Tsuna started when they were both in their shared bed, "Papa said that we're starting preschool soon."
Hayato smiled. "Juudaime, I think that it might be a little different from regular preschools considering what the old man told me."
Tsuna blinked.
"How did Uncle G tell you?"
"Well, it was like…"
"Hayato, you lousy brat this preschool will scar you for life, so you better not expect me to save you sorry behind, dammit!"
"Who said I needed your help, old man?"
"This is a freaking Mafia Preschool you brat! You should be scared for your life the moment you step foot through the door!"
"No way, I'm going to be the Juudaime's right hand man; I'm not scared of anything!" Hayato yelled out. G stopped for a second to look at his son with a sense of pride.
"This preschool will have Spartan methods to make sure you're fit to be a Mafioso; there will be teachers and students who will both try to get to you and Tsuna. I doubt you could handle that…" G said offhandedly. Hayato glared and pulled out more dynamite.
"DIE, OLD MAN!"
"EFFING HELL, HAYATO!"
Tsuna sweat dropped at his older brother.
"Ne, Hayato-nii, so we have to be careful at the preschool huh," Tsuna murmured. "I hope we can make friends."
"Don't worry Juudaime; I'm sure that we'll be able to get through it. Right now, just go to sleep." Hayato recommended. Tsuna nodded and fell asleep to the smell of gunpowder from his brother.
{Tsu 27 Goku 59 Yama 80 Hiba 18 Muku 69 Chro 96}
"VVOOOOIIIII!"
"SHUT THE HELL UP, TRASH!"
BOOM
CRASH
"FUCK!"
"Looks like XanXus-nii and Squalo-nii are here." Tsuna mentioned drowsily as he sat up along with Hayato who was spitting curses and reminding himself to plant dynamite in the annoying Varia member's beds.
"Juudaime, we should get dressed; today is the day we're supposed to go to that preschool." Hayato muttered, pulling out a black button up and shorts for himself and a sweatshirt and jeans for Tsuna, who took them from him.
The two of them took a bath, got dressed, and took out a pair of ear-plugs from their secret stash that they have when the Varia come to visit before going to breakfast.
"Ohayo, Papa."
"Yo, old man." The two five-year-olds got busy stuffing their faces with the chocolate chip pancakes that were waiting for them.
"Ohayo XanXus-nii, Squalo-nii, Mammon-nii, Bel-nii, Levi-nii, Luss-nee." Tsuna said after swallowing his bite of breakfast. Hayato gave a nod at all of them except for Bel. He hated the self-proclaimed prince ever since he almost killed Uri. He got his revenge by tying a lit rag on Mink's tail, which fueled their everlasting hatred for each other.
"Ushishishi, hello bomb brat; I heard that you're starting that Mafia preschool. Good luck; you'll need it." Bel sang out as he twirled his knife in between his fingers.
"What was that, you knife bastard?" Hayato growled out. G hit Hayato at the back of his head.
"Hayato, behave yourself." G mumbled out through his cereal.
"Tsuna, Hayato; do you two remember your Uncle Asari, Daemon, Alaude, and Cozart?" Giotto asked. The two nodded upon remembering their uncles that they met. "They're enrolling their kids in the school too, so be nice to them, ok?" Giotto said.
"Giotto, we better get them to school. XanXus do me a favor and try not to blow up the house while we're gone. And no, that wasn't an order, I'm not that dumb, it's just a request as the Vongola Storm Guardian." G said, knowing that XanXus would shoot a hole in his head if he gave the teen an order.
XanXus gave an irritated grunt.
The two Vongola men walked outside to walk into the car with their two sons when-
"KYAA! GIOTTO-SAN!"
"G-SAN, MARRY ME!"
The two pointedly ignored the screaming fan girls and got into their car. G gave the driver a single look and said "Drive like a bat out of hell."
It would be an understatement to say that they got to the Preschool fast than a person could say 'Katekyo Hitman Reborn'.
"Haha that was fun Papa," Tsuna said upon exiting the speedy car. Giotto looked slightly green, yet smiled nonetheless.
"Yeah… Tsuna that was… fun…" Giotto stuttered out. G leaned against the black paint job and rested his head on his arm.
"I'm getting too old for this…" G muttered out.
"Giotto, G!" A redhead called out to the two.
"Cozart, nice to… see you again…" Giotto muttered out, resisting the urge to heave and upchuck. He was the Vongola Primo, dammit. Vongola Primos do not puke in front of their kid's new school.
"Giotto, are you alright, you look pale." Cozart said, worrying about his old friend. G turned to the driver.
"As soon as… you bring us back home… you are fired…" G growled out. The driver gave a sheepish smile. This wasn't the first time that G made the driver go at extreme speeds to avoid fan girls, but in the end, he never got fired.
"Ahaha… You two are still the same. Anyway, this is my kid, Enma. My little Mami isn't big enough to start school yet…" Cozart said, gesturing to the red-haired boy behind him.
"That's… really interesting Cozart… I love you to death old friend… But I feel like utter shit…" G muttered out, gripping his stomach. He had a strong immune system and stomach due to Bianchi's Poison Cooking, but he still felt like he was going to see his breakfast again.
"G, you really haven't changed since when I've been in Japan." A familiar voice said, patting a hand on G's shoulder, making the tattooed man grip the Porsche harder in an attempt to not bowl over.
"Hey Asari…" Giotto said weakly. He felt a thump to his back and fell over, nearly suffocating Tsuna.
"Giotto. You're the Vongola Primo. I should arrest you for being taken down by a car ride and a kick." A handsome blonde in a trench coat said.
"GIOTTO! STAY STRONG; ALLOW ME TO PRAY THE LORD FOR YOUR SAFETY!" A black haired man in priest garbs shouted out.
Giotto's spirit left his body through his mouth.
"…I think you killed him, Alaude." A tall pineapple head piped out with two replicas at his legs; the girl with the skull eye patch looking at the man in curiosity and the boy with red and blue colored eyes chuckling quietly at the man.
"Papa?" Tsuna asked, poking his dad's cheek. Giotto twitched, not unlike a squirrel that was recently hit with a truck.
"Hey, Giotto, I thought you outgrew your loser phase when you became Primo." A voice said, leading back to a man with curly sideburns, a suit, and a green chameleon.
Giotto got the life smacked back into him and he shot straight up, along with G and the other nearby Guardians and Bosses.
"R-Re-Reborn-Sensei!" Giotto, G, Daemon, Asari, and Cozart yelped out. Alaude just got an unconvincing twitch in his eye.
"Ciaossu, my former students; I see that you brought fresh meat." Reborn stated calmly.
"Reborn, please, please, please, spare my little Chrome-chan." Daemon said desperately as said girl just tilted her head in confusion. "She's an innocent little girl, she doesn't deserve to be put through something so terrible."
Reborn only smiled.
"I'll see all of them in class."
'He totally ignored the request.' The men all thought at once, to Daemon's dismay.
{Tsu 27 Goku 59 Yama 80 Hiba 18 Muku 69 Chro 96}
Primo looked over to his son with a sort of sadness as he released his hand and Tsuna gave a reassuring smile. G stood by his boss and gave Hayato a sort of warning look that said not to mess this up. Hayato merely looked at him with a defiant look and nodded.
"Tsuna, you have your gloves right?"
"Yes Papa."
"You have your backup Dying Will Pills, right?"
"Yes Papa."
"Do you have Nut's ring?"
Tsuna lifted up the chain around his neck that gave an eager 'Rawr, rawr'.
"And remember, if anybody tries to kidnap you-"
"Burn them to crisp, right Papa?"
Primo patted his son's fluffy brunette hair. He was ready for his first day of preschool.
"HAYATO, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU, NO MORE DYNAMITE?"
"SHUT IT 'KAA-SAN! I'LL NEED IT TO PROTECT THE JUUDAIME!"
"BRAT! IF YOU KNEW HOW TO CONTROL URI, YOU WOULDN'T NEED DYNAMITES!"
"NOT MY FAULT YOU GOT ME A CAT THAT HATES ME!"
Tsuna sighed and took Hayato's hand before dragging him to the classroom and sitting at a table that was occupied by the kids he saw this morning.
"Hi, I'm Tsuna and this is Hayato; can we sit with you?" Tsuna asked with a smile.
"Hahaha, sure."
"EXTREME!"
"Kufufufu, sure."
"I'm OK with it if Mukuro-nii is."
"U-um, I don't mind."
"Hn, whatever Herbivore."
The two sat down and Tsuna sat in between the boy with red hair and eyes with lots of bandages and Hayato, who sat next to the tall kid with black hair and brown eyes.
The door was slammed open by a foot, ultimately turning the room silent.
Reborn walked inside and looked at all of the students.
"Hello class, you're all here because your parents are people called Mafioso and you are going to inherit their job. So now I must say that I am Reborn and," Reborn leaned on his desk and the chameleon jumped to his hand and transformed to a green gun, "Welcome to Mafia Preschool, in other words, HELL."