Author's Note: This is one of many big leaps as I just discovered the genius that is House M.D. a couple of weeks ago and I am still getting to know. However, already I see the relationship between House and Wilson can unbelievably be described as the "ultimate bro-mance" as it has been already. But as you watch you get the sense that there could indeed be something more than just "best friends" by behavior alone. You don't see many relationships like that nowadays. Hope you all enjoy! Please be advised I am a bad updater and get frequent writer's block. Critiques do help though, so please review!

Love,

Citrine

PS: I OWN NOTHING!

It was late in the evening as the fancy rental car drove through the dark Manhattan suburb.

"Oh great we're lost!"

"We are not lost, I am following the GPS!"

"Hey I maybe drunk, but even I can tell we are lost!"

"Well it's not my fault SOMEONE wanted to check out that stripper joint on the outskirts! Why didn't we just stick to your old haunts right in the city?"

"Jeez Wilson, what's wrong with a little change of scenery?"

"House, it's a strip club, half naked women, dancing and performing other acts of debauchery. What made this place different from the rest?"

The middle aged man named Gregory House, well, Dr. Gregory House to be correct, snorted then smirked.

"The fact that these women were actually naked, dancing and performing acts of debauchery!" He said with a bit of glee. "And the alcohol wasn't half bad either."

"So I smell." The designated driver for the evening, House's best friend as well, Dr. James Wilson said with a glare.

"You're just being a priss because you appointed yourself as babysitter!" House said. "Admit it, you enjoyed yourself though, especially that one I paid to give you a lap dance."

"With the money you stole from my wallet…AGAIN!" Wilson said. "So technically I paid for it! And she wasn't that great either!"

House shrugged.

"You and your technicalities." He said crossing his arms.

"She looked like she was still in high school...I felt more like a pervert."

"You are one."

"Compared to you, I'm a pussy cat."

"Emphasis on the word pu-

"THE POINT IS! Wilson yelled. "I just want to get back to the hotel, shower, sleep and forget about tonight."

House frowned.

"You of all people I thought would enjoy it." He said. It's been awhile since you got back in the game."

Wilson sighed.

"Maybe I am tired of the game." He said. "I just brushed past forty House, I'm not getting any younger."

"Or better looking for that matter."

"I just want, I don't know, to actually have a bit of peace." He said. "A little bit of normalcy in my life and yes, that includes settling down."

"Oh crap, you are not going to start expressing your feelings are you!" House whined. "If you are I might as well start my hangover right now and vomit all over this lovely rental car. You and your tendency to emote pretty much screw with my whole buzz!"

James snarled while House continued to rant.

"And need I remind you that you attempted to settle, not 1, not 2, but 3 times and countless girlfriends, but guess where they ended you!"

"To the many circles of Hell with you as my tour guide."

"Hey, not my fault that it's my doorstep your exes place the cardboard box with you inside crying like the abandoned beagle you are."

"There's always hotels." Wilson said. "If I am really cramping your idea of style. Though you always seem to have an issue if I am away from you for long periods of time."

"Excuse me if I had grown accustomed to the finer things in life."

"You mean me as your constant slave boy."

"No one says you have to cook, clean, or do any of the other in closet homosexual, OCD things you tend to do."

"You just demand to be fed."

"And you respond to the call." House said.

Wilson cringed.

"You're giving me a migraine!"

"And you're making my buzz suck more." House said. "Pull over."

"What?"

"I said pull over." House demanded. "I gotta take a leak."

"Here!" Wilson said noticing they had reached junkyard. "Can't you wait till we're back at the hotel?"

"Hello?" House declared. "This is me we are talking about! As spry as I am, booze and my bladder seem to have an ongoing battle, which means that if I don't play Jimmy Carter and help them reach some sort of peace talk, then we are going to have a nice mess on the upholstery that will no doubt be coming out of the hospital's expenses. Love to see you explain that one to Cuddy! Now pull over!"

Wilson could all but shake his head angrily and pull the car over. House fumbled around for his cane and worked himself out of the car. House then limped over to the driver's side and proceeded to relieve himself in front of the abandoned junk yard.

Unfortunately for James, his own bladder decided at the moment to respond to all the seltzer and the one beer he had at the strip joint. With a frustrated sigh he got out of the car and of course repeat the same pattern as Greg.

"Well, well guess I am not the only old man around here?" House said with smirk. "Maybe we should bet to see who can finish first?"

"Shut up." Wilson said, his brown eyes looking up at the sky. "Any more remarks and you will be doing that out of a catheter for the rest of your unnatural life."

"Well now if you wanna get kinky?"

"Shut up."

"Wanna see whose bigger?"

"HOUSE!"

A few more moments and finally both men were zipping up their pants.

"Well, now that that's done, onward to the hotel oh trusty steed!" House said lifting his cane in the air. "I want to get back and order some of that Swedish girl on girl porn before turning in!"

"Your crudeness knows no bounds."

"You think that's crude." House said as he hobbled over to the passenger side of the car. "You should see what I do to you in your sleep."

Wilson was just about to open the door when they heard a jingle.

"What was that?" He murmured.

House also stopped dead in his tracks.

"The boogie man?"

The jingling got louder and louder and suddenly there was a whine.

"Car?" James said nervously.

"Car." House agreed and the two of them quickly hopped in. Just as James was about to turn the key in the ignition, something caught his eyes. He turned his head to see a figure limping towards them.

"Wait a second." He said quietly.

"How about not!" House said. "I am not waiting to see what lurks over there! Gun it Jimmy!"

Wilson though slowly opened the door and attempted to get out.

"WILSON WHAT THE HELL!" House whispered angrily. "GET BACK IN HERE! IT'S PROBABLY JUST SOME CRAZY HOMICIDAL MANIAC!"

"Just hold on." James said as he slowly got out of the car.

"WILSON!"

House growled and struggled to get out of the car. Out of the corner of his eye he saw James moving into the junkyard.

"WILSON!" House said hobbling as best as he could around the car. Suddenly he saw James kneel down.

"GREG GET OVER HERE!"

"What!" House yelled annoyingly relieved that he didn't see anyone in front of or around James brandishing any weapons.

"I NEED YOUR HELP!"

House limped quickly over to Wilson who was kneeling down murmuring. His eyes widened when he saw what James was looking at.

"Aw no." House said.