Since I now have three first chapters of stories sitting on the Doc Manager, I decided it was time to actually start one of them. This story will probably not be as regularly updated as TOU, although the second chapter is all but finished so it shouldn't be long.

The next chapter will be M rated though, so I suggest if you want to keep reading either to alert it or change the filter settings to find it :)

I don't own the characters, hope you enjoy :)

Stepping into the hallway that night, Jackie somewhat reluctantly peeled her jacket off. In all honesty she didn't want to be here, her own home and she felt uncomfortable and on edge and she realised sadly that as much as work felt like an extended torture session about now, she'd still rather be there than here.

The floorboards creaked and she slowly lifted her head to see Brian standing in the doorway to the living room, watching her almost warily. "We really do need to talk," he told her quietly.

"I know," she whispered after a long silence. Her eyes met his, her tone weary as she asked. "But does it really have to be tonight though? I'm tired and this case really took it out of me."

"Ah yes." he remarked surprisingly bitterly, "my wife the bomb disposal expert."

Her eyes closed as she shook her head, her hands running through her hair. "Don't be like that, you know what this job is like, we don't always have a choice."

"You had a choice," he snarled.

"I couldn't just turn and walk away from it, I'm sorry I put you through that but you have to accept that this is my job."

Brian shook his head. "I don't think we should have this conversation in the hallway." He inclined his head towards the living room and she slowly trailed after him, feeling the walls close in on her when he shut the door firmly behind her as she stepped into the room. He folded his arms as he looked at her. "This doesn't have to be your job, you know that."

"I don't want to leave everything I've worked for behind," she told him.

"But you're miserable!" he yelled, looking at her as though she was some stranger standing in front of him rather than his wife. "You…you can barely drag yourself out of bed in the morning."

"I know the last few weeks have been difficult-"

"That's a fucking understatement!"

She finally saw red, snapping angrily. "Well you haven't exactly helped the situation."

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"When I needed you, where were you?"

Brian looked at her blankly. "I don't understand."

"Michael's funeral," she forced out, her eyes stinging with tears just at the thought if him, of what had happened. It was still all so raw, so bloody painful.

"I had to work."

Jackie laughed humourlessly. "So it's alright for you to abandon me, your wife, for work, but God forbid if I do anything above the line of duty."

"That's not the point I'm making, my point is that we're supposed to be building a life together and we can't do that if I'm in London and you're up here."

Staring at him, Jackie wanted to scream at him, he wasn't listening to her, the man who was meant to stand by her through the good times and the bad and he simply didn't seem to grasp how she felt. "I'm not going to London," she finally replied firmly. "You never even mentioned that as a possibility when we got married and I'm not giving up everything for a desk job and to play the doting wife," she spat furiously.

"Realistically if we want to have children then sooner or later you were going to have to walk away anyway."

Jackie's eyes widened. "Children?" she echoed. "You can't support me when I've lost one of the people I was closest to, couldn't tear yourself away from your desk when I asked you to and yet you think I'm going to suddenly agree to starting a family with you, are you insane?"

His jaw twitched in barely suppressed rage. "This was what we wanted, a family."

"Yes but I also wanted a husband who'd stand by me and I haven't seen you do too much of that, especially recently."

"It'll be different when we get away from here."

"You're not listening," she groaned, her hand going to her forehead as she frowned in frustration.

"It will be a fresh start for us," he insisted. "What we need."

"We've been married for less than a year and already we need a fresh start," she remarked sadly. "Doesn't exactly bode well for us, does it?"

"A lot's happened," he argued.

"And we should be able to get through that regardless of where we live," she countered. "And instead we're…we're sinking."

"Look there isn't anything for us here anymore. All my career options are in London and you've already said you hate this Burke character, that you don't want to work with him, this will work," he insisted.

"I think given the circumstances that I might have been a bit hasty in judging Burke," she admitted almost reluctantly. "He's not that bad, and anyway I don't want to leave my friends, my family."

"The family and friends that you're too busy to actually see," Brian replied blandly.

"I don't want to leave my job either. I won't be happy sitting at a desk all day, Brian and I don't see why your career should be given precedence over mine."

"Jackie…" he finally got out between tightly clenched teeth. "I'm not staying here, the Met have offered me the Deputy Assistant Commissioner position and I don't intend to turn them down."

She swallowed heavily against the lump in her throat. "Then there isn't anything else to say, is there?"

His eyes widened as he realised what she was saying, he stepped closer to her and wrapped his hands around her forearms. "It doesn't have to be like this," he told her hoarsely. "We could try long distance for a while, until, until…" he trailed off, the words 'until you see sense' left hanging in the air.

Jackie shook her head. "What would be the point?" she whispered. "Once you get down there you're not going to want to come back up, and I'm not going to change my mind, so what's the point?"

"So this is it?" he asked disbelievingly.

Nodding slowly, almost painfully, she choked out, "I don't think it's meant to be this hard and I don't see the point in us struggling along and just delaying the inevitable."

He tried to cup her cheek and she pulled away, unable to bear it. She'd meant her vows when they'd married but in reality they didn't seem to have realised any of them, couldn't seem to compromise on the smallest of things, never mind something so huge. Not only that but she wasn't sure she could forgive him his abandonment of her when she'd even overcome her pride to ask him to stay with her after Michael's death. She'd wanted him to hold her close to him and soothe her pain while reassuring her that it would all be fine, even if it wouldn't, and he hadn't done any of that. Instead he'd turned his back, maybe not intentionally, but he certainly hadn't even made the slightest attempt to comfort her; not really.

After a long, terse silence, he finally spoke, "Is this what you really want?"

"I think it's for the best," she replied, knowing she wasn't answering the question, but then she didn't actually want her marriage to end, a foolish part of her had thought, had hoped that this would shock her into fighting for her, for them. It obviously hadn't and it was leaving her more and more convinced that even though she didn't want this it might actually be the right thing for them.

Brian nodded. "Right then, I'll sleep in the spare room tonight and start packing my stuff in the morning, I'm due back in London the day after so if you forward whatever I leave behind once I have a place set up…"

"Ok," she agreed weakly. "I'll do that."

"Once things have settled," he continued, "we can decide what we want to do about this place, whether you want to take over the mortgage or move-" He broke off, rubbing at the back of his neck, his lips pulling into a terse thin line. "I can't do this," he got out after a moment's pause. "Not now." Looking over her one last time, he gave a small, soft sigh. "I take it you'll be away when I get up tomorrow?"

"I'll probably be at work," she confirmed.

"Then I guess this really is it." He stepped away from her and without another word left her standing alone in the living room, listening to the almost patronizing ticking of the clock that someone had given them as a wedding present.

When she let herself into the flat late the next night, there was no sign of Brian. Slowly walking through her hallway she paused as she saw the folded up slip of paper lying there, his front door key placed neatly on top of it.

Picking it up the note, the key fell to one side clunking against the glass of the table. It was as she expected, short and to the point, no platitudes or expression of regret, simply;

I'll send you a forwarding address for the rest of my things,

Brian.

She didn't know if she should laugh or cry, thirteen words and their marriage was over, dead in the water. Foolishly last night when she'd given him that ultimatum of sorts she'd still secretly hoped that she meant enough to him that he'd choose her over his career. She couldn't believe how wrong she'd been.

The dim light of the hall caught the sparkle of her engagement ring, and it was glinting at her almost mockingly; she couldn't stand it. She pulled both rings off easily - after all she hadn't even worn them that long, and opening one of the small drawers in the cabinet of her living room, shoved them inside.

She felt like she'd failed, and although she didn't want to advertise that fact, she couldn't bring herself to keep on the wedding ring of a man who'd found it almost insultingly easy to walk away from her.