A/N: This might get a little sketchy on the details, but bear with me.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

Carry on my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more
-Kansas -Carry on my wayward son

The only part about the plan that Sabina liked was the scarf.

It was Henri Bendel, and had cost a fraction of its original price and Sabina considered it a total shopping win.

She mentioned this to Ben, who only rolled his eyes and told her to keep her head in the game.

Which she had. Up to this point, she had been all ears. But even some action superhero had to acknowledge a fabulous bargain.

Besides, it reminded her of Alex, but she didn't tell Ben that. Didn't tell anybody, really, why she was so attached to the piece of striped material, just let them think that she was just another airhead with an eye for sparkly things.

She'd wanted it to be in on the plan. The scarf would be prefect for the situation, and it would remind her why she was doing this.

For Alex. Anything, for Alex.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

6 months ago

"Dude, that's so lame it's not even funny."

Sabina sucked in an offended breath as her best friend, Jenna, blasphemed. "Jen, how could you?" She waved the bracelet she was holding in front of Jenna's nose. "This is so cute. I told you that I was the chunky- jewelry type of chick from here on out."

Jenna shuddered. "As your best friend, I need to point out that-" Her expression tightened as her eyes wandered over Sabina's shoulder. "Hey, Alex."

Sabina began smiling idiotically as two arms wrapped themselves around her waist and lips pressed against her neck briefly. "Hey, Jenna. Sabina."

Sabina twisted her neck to kiss her boyfriend on the cheek. "You're late," She murmured.

"Sorry." Alex sounded sincere. "Had a project."

"Collins?" Sabina knew all his professors by now, and the levels of work he had to do. It seriously sucked, having a genius for a boyfriend. Ever since he got his scholarship to Colombia, she hardly saw Alex.

"Mmhm." Alex said, and Jenna gagged.

"Would you two cut it out already?" Jenna complained. Underneath the standard single-friend-when-couple-zone-out annoyance, Sabina heard the genuine irritation. Jenna really didn't like Alex.

Which was too bad, because she would just have to deal.

"Nice scarf," Jen adds. "That a Bendel?"

Sabina looks at him, and he looks at his jacket. Sure enough, Sabina's new purchase is wrapped around his neck casually.

"Grabbed it when I was going out." Alex explains apologetically. He has even gone red, which Sabina thinks is adorable. "That okay?"

"Sure it is." Sabina beams. She doesn't ask what he was doing in their apartment if he was at campus this whole time. "Looks good on you."

Alex grins, and her heart skips happily. "Love you, Sabina."

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

"Let's go over this one more time."

The people in the van groan, Sabina included. Ben looks offended. "Well, we should." He mutters.

The thing about their plan is that it's not complicated, on any level. Reckless, suicidal, yes. Well thought-out? No. Sabina thinks that the strength in the plan lies in the simplicity.

"How much longer?" The chick in the corner asks. Sabina never really wondered who she was. She didn't think she wanted to.

The other guy, the one who refers to Alex as 'Cub' and Ben introduced to her as Gavin, looks at the bulky watch on his wrist. "Two hours, eight minutes."

Sabina is pretty impressed. Sure, she lived here for some time, but she had no idea Britain was so effing big. And it wasn't like they were going from one end to the other. It was all strictly Midlands, or whatever the hell they called it.

Sabina remembers that way before she even met Alex, she went to Cornwall with her parents. While not exactly South-of-France material, it was pretty awesome. More than that. She can still identify that moment when she looked at the fierce grey sea, how very beautiful it was, and at the same time, so very angry. Like it could toss you around and rip you apart if you went near enough.

Deadly, but beautiful.

Sabina wishes she knew better words to describe her boyfriend.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

5 months ago

"We need to talk."

Sabina raises her eyes to meet Jenna's. "About what?" She asks cheerfully, despite her instinctive wariness.

"About you. And Alex." Jenna sounds as if her teeth are gritted.

"We're an awesome couple, aren't-"

"Save it." Jenna barks. "I'm not buying the dumb blonde act, Sabs. Goddammit, I know you!"

Sabina's gaze turns steely. "You don't know jackshit."

Jenna's shoulders square. "I know that this isn't you. That that asshole –Alex-" She spits his name out like it was poison in her mouth, "is killing you slowly. I know that you deserve better than some son of a bitch who screws anyone who stands still long enough."

"Don't even go there." Sabina warns.

But she can't help inhaling sharply, because that stings. Sure, Alex wasn't very good at the monogamy thing, but still…

Thing is, Sabina kind of knew that Alex was sleeping around. Knew all the other crap that went down when the lights went out, too, but she'd kept her mouth shut about it all and silently willed it away.

Alex had a rough childhood, she reasoned.

Actually, 'rough' was a pretty fucking big understatement in context to Alex's years in Britain, particularly the fourteenth one. He didn't like to talk about it –would you?- but Sabina gathers that it all ended in one big Shakespearean bloodbath, and Alex had ended up friendless, orphaned and several kinds of fucked up.

But people got over the past. They forgot and they forgave. That was what being human was about.

Alex doesn't seem to be able to do either and Sabina realizes that she's tired.

Tired of defending Alex to everyone, of making up fake excuses, of lying to everyone and anyone about how happy they were together, even to her parents. Alex still plays up the Misunderstood Yet Charming Wayward Soul when it came to Edward and Liz, and Sabina's tired of letting him. She's tired of his empty promises and his glorious glimpses of the future with her, with a fucking sunset and the works, tired of cleaning up his messes.

But…

"I can't leave him." Sabina admits quietly.

"Why not?" Jenna sounds gentle, but there is an underlying desperation in her voice. "Why, hun?"

"If I do," her voice trips, "I'll never forgive myself. I have to stay, even if I'll never be able to fix him. I owe him that. Besides…I don't think I can." She laughs shakily. "He's too big a part of me."

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

A large portion of their plan relies on blind luck, and the other on Sabina's reputation.

She fishes out her Press ID and stares at it for a few seconds. Being the daughter of Edward Pleasure had a few perks attached, and one of them was being an instant hit in the newspaper arena. Ben had assured her that she was as much of a celebrity in Britain as she was in the US, and she made herself believe him.

She wonders whether her dad ever meant it to be this way, when he fought tooth and nail for legal custody of Alex. Whether he knew that his adopted wayward son would one day rip his biological daughter's heart and life to shreds. Whether he knew that his daughter, precious, laughing Sabina would one day throw her life away for Alex. Because even if they do get out of this, Sabina would be broken in ways she didn't want to contemplate on.

Gavin looks at her quietly. "You okay with this?"

It's the first time anyone hasn't taken for granted that she was giving this her all by choice, and she is almost surprised. She's almost tempted to tell him that no, she's not, she's terrified and she can't see anything past how fucking much she hates Alex for getting her into this mess.

But instead, she smiles. "I'm peachy."

He looks as if he wants to believe her as much as she does.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

4 months ago

"Think fast!"

Alex grins as he catches the passport in his hand. "Nice throw."

Sabina shoves him as she puts another pile of clothes into his bag. Alex packed light, even for a week-long trip. Sabina had been on his case the entire day, making sure he took everything of importance while he hung around, making jokes and getting in her way.

They were in a good place. It had been years since Sabina and Alex had just hung out as friends, if not as lovers. Alex had recently turned back into the boy Sabina remembered, the one with the laughing dark eyes and smart mouth that she had fallen in love with.

He was laughing now as he caught her by the wrist and pulled her close. "What would I do without you?" he murmurs against her hair.

She smiles against his chest. "Crash and burn."

Alex half-smiles, but his expression turns serious. "Seriously, Sabina. I love you, okay? No matter how I've been acting, I… I love you. Please remember that, no matter what happens."

And Sabina gets her first premonition. It's just a touch of ice along her spine, really, but she shivers. "D'you have to go?"

Because she hasn't liked this at all, not from the first, when he said he was going for a workshop in England. She thought Alex had sworn not to go back.

"Sorry, honey." And he looks as if he is. "But I really could get a shot at working for Sintech, and everyone says that the opportunity's too good to pass up."

Of course, there's Alex's future as a brilliant physician to consider. Sometimes, Sabina catches herself wishing that he wasn't so full of potential. God knew it would make her life that much easier.

Immediately, she's ashamed of her thought. She was happy for her boyfriend and crazy proud. But still, it was hard.

"Time to go." Alex says grabbing his bag. He kisses her on the lips, and it's lingering, sweet, and her heart shudders a little. "We're gonna be okay."

For the first time in years, she believes him.

She should have known better.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

2 months ago

"Yes I fucking saw it!" Sabina screams down her phone, and on the other end, there is dead silence. Her aunt has hung up.

She breathes deeply. It's the first time she really flew off the handle, ever since she saw that fucking thing. The calls have been streaming in, friends, relatives, wanting to know whether it really was him –it couldn't be- on the front page of their newspapers. Kind, polite, lost cousin Alex was a killer? Couldn't be. Could it?

She treated all the enquiries the same way, with a smile in her voice, assuring them all that there had been a terrible mistake. After all, only one paper had printed the story, and it wasn't a very good one at that.

She has her suspicions about that, and they are confirmed when a man named Joe Byrnes calls her and informs her stiffly that he is from the CIA.

"Yes, it's true."He says, in a gruff voice. "Alex Rider was arrested yesterday at 2147 hours for the murder of Sir Alan Blunt, retired Head of Special Operations of the MI6."

She calculates, and laughs to herself. "No wonder he didn't call before dinner." She mumbles, almost inaudibly.

"I'm very sorry." A pause. "I…I knew Alex. Worked with him some years back. He…I can't believe it."

He hangs up abruptly, yet Sabina continues clutching the phone to her ear, frozen in the middle of their kitchen.

Finally, she speaks. "Fuck you, Blunt."

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

She flashes her ID at the guard, and he barely glances at it. He's already recognized the face, and to a smalltown cop like him, face masks aren't a viable option. "Go ahead, ma'am." he says.

Ben looks as nervous as she feels. Of course, you couldn't see it right away, but Sabina had a way of reading people and knows that Ben's scared shitless.

The security cameras don't help. They're the only indication that they have a high-profile criminal in the premises, in this small station in the middle of nowhere.

It was Gavin who was in charge of the research, and it was him who found the weak spot in the MI6 plan. They would take Alex with maximum security, but as fate would have it, the Glastonbury festival was going on at the same time and all their resources were tied up in that. With the Olympics coming up, the British government and internal security couldn't afford to fail at a major international event beforehand.

So for a period of forty-eight hours, Alex would be at a small police station in Warwickshire, heavily monitored yet not adequately guarded. It was that little chink that Ben had planned to turn to their favor.

Sabina and Ben exchanged looks as soon as they were out of sight of the guard. The plan to break Alex out was officially underway.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

1 month ago

"He didn't do it."

Sabina almost smiles. "Yeah, I heard you the first ninety-nine times."

Ben snorts humorlessly. "Well, it's true."

He says that he trained with Alex. That he, for one, will never forget all the times Alex saved the world, and that there are others.

It's not much, but it's something.

"Blunt had a lot of enemies," Ben continues. Sabina thinks, I was one of them. "And for all we know, it could be another assassin. Gang 50, maybe. As if SCORPIA wasn't bad enough."

Sabina doesn't point out that she didn't ask, nor does she care. She sees that he needs to say this, to get it out.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, she remembers something. "Were you in love with him?"

He freezes.

"I mean, I know you had a thing," which is a pretty delicate way of referring to having a relationship behind her back, "but were you…?"

He's silent, and she begins to think that he wouldn't answer, after all, when he speaks in a low voice. "Yeah. Couldn't really help it." He meets her eyes squarely, and she sees that he's almost as broken as she is. "He loved you more, though. Always. Even when he was with me, it was to get rid of the guilt of not being good enough for you."

She looks away, her eyes stinging. In the silence, Gavin comes in with a chick called Tamara and they fall back to business.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

When she sees Alex, it's both like a punch in the stomach and freefalling through the air.

He's thinner, and is wearing a Seether T-shirt Sabina had packed for him, and the tears that refused to fall throughout these hellish months dim her sight. His fair hair was hanging in limp strands.

When he sees them, his pupils are blown wide and Sabina curses. Of course they drugged him. Of course.

"Sabina." He smiles, like it's Christmas come early. "Ben."

Ben is already at work, her scarf obscuring him from view of the cameras. "We're getting you out." Ben says briefly.

Alex's handsome face tightens in almost childlike confusion. "Why?"

Sabina rolls her eyes as Ben begins explaining the plan. When he's done, Alex looks less like a heroin junkie and more like the analytical whiz kid of Colombia and she's never been prouder of him.

"Nice." He comments. The gate swings open, and she's impressed. That Ben was faster than he looked. "But no, guys."

They both blink at him stupidly.

"I'm not coming." He elaborated, gently. His eyes are on Sabina's. "I did it, Sabina. I killed Blunt."

She continues staring at him as the world seems to narrow down to a claustrophobic cell.

"He-they- were about to recruit another kid. Yassen's son." He laughed bitterly. "Because I was such a success. Bet they're reconsidering now."

Sabina still can't speak as her lungs seem to close.

Ben is little better. "But-"

"I can't go, Sabina. Fox." Alex looks calm, older, and Sabina would have punched him if the wind hadn't been knocked out of her. "If I go now, they'll hush it up. You can help, though."

She stares as he gathers both her hands in his. "Publicize this as much as you can. Tell everyone my story, how they fucked me up and screwed me over. Maybe then, they'll leave the kids alone."

Sabina's throat catches, and then and only then does the first tear fall.

"I love you." He whispers, holding her close. "So much. But you have to let me do this."

He turns to Ben, who is locked in position, his expression shellshocked. He reaches out and gathers Ben into their hug. "I love you both."

He kisses them, first Sabina, and then Ben, gently on the forehead, then on the lips.

Ben reaches out for her arm as Alex pushes them away. "Come on, Sabs. Let's go."

Alex's expression flickers, and Sabina glimpses the pain under the mask. She shrugs free of Ben and kisses Alex roughly. "I'm so proud of you. And Jack and your parents would have been, too."

Alex's eyes widen, then he nods.

Sabina lets herself be shepherded out by Ben. They pass the old guard, and he nods at them, completely unaware.

Neither look back.

*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)
A month later, the headlines were taken by Sabina Pleasure, daughter of veteran journalist Edward Pleasure, and her expose on international intelligence agencies, and their usage of a minor in various missions. She also accused them of blackmail, extortion and bribery with an arsenal of witness accounts and irrefutable proof.

Accompanying each article in every paper was a photo of a man in a prison cell. He had fair hair and a slim build, and was wearing a colorful designer scarf.

A/N: Not a big fan of Sabina, but I simply had to get this out of my system. Had a blast writing it, even though it's depressing at parts. Be a love and review, please?