A.N. Okay so I am watching the Millionaire Matchmaker while writing this, so this chapter might be a little screwed up.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own CATS or Les Miserables. Sniff. WHHHHHHY? Anywho, I do own Rosalie and Coradette.

Thanks again to x-Stage-STARR-x and Eraman for reviewing. All reviewers now get a virtual batch of red velvet cake balls and a hug from the character of their choice.

Kudos to Miss-Misto for some funny quotes. What can I say? We get on caffeine and sugar highs a lot and we say stupid and random stuff.

ON WITH CHAPTER 3!

Mungojerrie looked skeptically at his friend. Etcetera had slicked down her cream tabby fur with water, making her look older than she was. She had crushed some charcoal, mixed it with water and had lined her eyes heavily.

"Cettie, wot on Ea'th are ya doin'?"

Etcetera blushed and continued slicking her fur down.

"This is my distraction Jer."

Mungojerrie's eyes widened considerably.

"Ya can' be serious?"

Etcetera was about to give him a smart-ass answer, when Rosalie and Coradette walked up. Rosalie immediately looked Etcetera from head to toe.

"Etcetera what the hell is going on?"

Coradette and Mungojerrie smacked the kitten's shoulders. Rosalie shrugged.

"Guys, living here, I've grown up using that language."

Coradette frowned at her, almost maternally.

"Not around us, young lady."

Rosalie shrugged again, grinning impishly.

"Oh well. If thou is pissed, thou must deal."

Etcetera waved her paws around in front of her friends' faces.

"Hello? Guys, focus!"

Her friends snapped their heads back to face the cream Queen. Etcetera nodded, satisfied.

"Okay. Are you guys ready?"

Rosalie started bouncing up and down, her long headfur flopping in her eyes. Mungojerrie rolled his eyes and placed one paw on top of the kitten's head, stopping the bouncing.

"Awlroight Rose. Calm down."

Rosalie nodded enthusiastically. Etcetera rolled her eyes and took a breath. She smoothed down one last piece of fur.

"Okay, wish me luck."

There were murmurs of 'luck' from her friends. Etcetera landed her gaze on the four guards who stood at the exit. Four very tall Toms; a gray tabby, a brown and black harlequin, a solid black, and a brown tabby. She took another breath and sauntered towards them, swinging her hips as she had seen some of the older Queens do. Immediately, the black Tom's eyes locked on her. His face twisted into a disgusting smirk. He elbowed his friends who also locked their eyes on the cream Queen. Etcetera batted her long eyelashes flirtatiously.

"Hello," she purred seductively, tracing the stripes on the gray tabby's arm.

The disgusting Tom wrapped one arm around the lowest part of her waist. His rancid breath tickled her ear.

"Well 'ello," he growled. "Who are you?"

Etcetera cocked one thin black eyebrow.

"Does it really matter?"

Suddenly, the brown and black harlequin grabbed her from the tabby. He pulled her against his chest, paws roaming over her figure.

"No, darlin' it doesn't," he whispered.

Etcetera forced another flirtatious smile. It took all of her will power not to vomit. She stroked his cheek with one paw. The black Tom grabbed her next, one arm wrapping tightly around her waist, the other paw forcing her chin up. Etcetera stared into his sickly yellow eyes as his face got closer to hers.

Suddenly, he, along with the other three Toms, was knocked out with a large stick. Etcetera stepped away quickly as they fell, barely avoiding the black Tom falling on her. She shuddered visibly. Mungojerrie wrapped her in a hug.

"Don' you eva' do tha' again," he whispered.

Etcetera nodded, breathing deeply.

"Gladly."

Coradette and Rosalie ran to join the hug. Once again, Rosalie was squeezing the air out of her older friend. Etcetera gasped for breath.

"Rosalie!" Coradette and Mungojerrie simultaneously scolded.

Rosalie backed up again, a guilty look on her small face.

"Sorry! Again."

Etcetera laughed but stopped when she heard a small moan from one of the unconscious Toms.

"Let's get out of here."

Her friends nodded in agreement. They began to walk to the exit, but a rust and white Tom blocked their way. He folded his arms.

"Where are you going?"

Coradette rolled her eyes, apparently very close to being pissed off.

"Plato, move."

"No," Plato retorted. "I want to come too."

Etcetera was at the end of her rope.

"Fine, fine," she hissed. "You can come. Let's just go before these bastards wake up."

Plato nodded happily and followed the three cats out.