A/N: HOLY CRAP I can't believe it's been six years since I started writing this, and five years since I updated. And I can't believe I didn't write the freaking finale until now. I'M SO SORRY. Life happened, and my muse ran off to other things. Why have I finally got around to writing the finale now, you ask? You can thank Mr John Barrowman himself. He visited Auckland, New Zealand last weekend for Armageddon, and I had the crazy urge to give him a copy of this musical, purely for his entertainment. Of course, that meant I had to write the final scene. And, voila! I don't expect my original readers to still be around/interested in this musical, but on the off-chance that this update reaches your inbox, I am sincerely sorry for making you wait so long, and I hope it's worth the wait - and THANK YOU for sticking with me! To all the new readers who this update finds, I hope you have fun reading it! I will also be posting this on AO3 (where I post my current fanfic) so if anyone wants to download it, you can do it there. I have the same username on AO3 as I do here :)
Anyway, on with the show! Here's the list of songs - there's one entirely new song, plus reprises of all your old favourites ;)
28. Jack Is Back: Finale/Reprise (The Nightmare Before Christmas)
29. Darkness Of The Dead (Reprise): Music Of The Night (The Phantom Of The Opera)
30. The Name On Everybody's Lips Is Gonna Be Ianto! (Reprise): Roxie (Chicago)
31. Jack Is Back (Reprise): Finale/Reprise (The Nightmare Before Christmas)
32. Jones, Ianto Jones (Reprise): I Know Him So Well (Chess) (again, I used John Barrowman's solo version!)
33. Day In The Life Of Torchwood (Reprise): Jellicle Songs For Jellicle Cats (Cats)
SCENE SEVEN/FINALE:
[We're back at the Hub, with everything looking cleaner, brighter. Not as dungeon-like. More like... home. The music builds as the team enters together. They move about the Hub as they sing, checking their computers, looking through paperwork on their desks, etc. JACK stands near the cogwheel entrance and looks around like he hasn't seen the place in years.]
['Jack is Back']
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sings]
La la la la la la la la!
La la la la la la la la!
Jack's OK, and he's back, hooray
(IANTO rolls his eyes, indulging them.)
IANTO: [sings]
He's alright...
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sings]
Damn right!
Celebrate
Let's not fight
Wheeeee!
(IANTO begrudgingly smiles and joins in.)
ALL (except JACK): [sings]
Jack is back, now everyone sing
In this Hub of Torchwood...
(The music softens into the background, and JACK shakes his head, amused, finally making his way into the middle of the Hub.)
JACK: Hey, have you redecorated in here?
IANTO: Yes, as a matter of fact, and you'll do well not to make a mess of it on your first day back.
(JACK tries to subtly put his arms around IANTO's waist, who raises an eyebrow and neatly sidesteps him, a smirk on his face.
JACK: (purring)
With what I've got in mind, I can't make any promises...
OWEN: Christ, Jack's only been back five minutes and you sods can't even keep it in your pants...
GWEN: Isn't that the pot calling the kettle black, Owen?
OWEN: (without thinking)
Me and Tosh are more professional than that, actually!
(OWEN realises what he's said at the same time as everyone else. He coughs, and actually blushes. Even JACK is distracted from his efforts to snag IANTO.)
OWEN: Well? What are you all staring at?
(OWEN himself is looking anywhere but TOSH, who also coughs, drawing the team's attention to her instead.)
TOSH: I... asked Owen out on date a few weeks ago. A drink, a game of pool. And he said yes. Er, obviously. We're... kind of seeing each other. It's not a big deal.
(Judging by the undeniable smile on TOSH's face, it is, in fact, a big deal.)
OWEN: (interjecting)
I'm going to keep flirting with people, mind you! I can't help it if I'm good at it.
TOSH: (smile softening)
You can be king of flirts.
(TOSH and OWEN both smile dopily at each other for a few moments, the rest of the team watching them. Then...)
JACK, IANTO & GWEN: (simultaneously)
About bloody time!
(TOSH and OWEN both jump, and turn their attention back to the team. Now it's GWEN's turn to fidget, specifically with a certain ring finger.)
GWEN: While we're on the subject...
(GWEN takes a few cautious steps over to JACK. JACK frowns, looking at her.)
While you were away... Rhys and I got engaged!
(JACK's mouth falls open, and he stands in stunned silence until a grin takes over his face.)
JACK: Congratulations, Gwen! Rhys is... one lucky man.
(A less manic, but more genuine smile.)
I'm happy for you.
GWEN: (whispers)
Thank you, Jack. I'm happy for me too.
(IANTO clears his throat to break the silence.)
IANTO: Well. That Blowfish isn't going to drag itself into the morgue. Give me a hand, Owen?
OWEN: Only if you make us a cuppa afterwards...
GWEN: Tosh, can you please get started on the report? I've got to let the Police know we've handled it.
TOSH: I'll get right on it - just have to check the Archives for our last report on our delightful 'friend'.
(The music grows louder again, and the song restarts. The team move around the Hub, getting ready to complete their tasks, except JACK, who slowly walks around, marvelling at the place he wasn't sure he'd ever see again. JACK sings as if to himself.)
JACK: [sings]
I'm back, I'm back
I've no more need to roam!
I'm back
The Hub is my true home
I'm back
It's like it's been an age
I'm back
It's really very strange
ALL (except JACK): [sings]
This is Torchwood!
Torchwood! Torchwood! Torchwood!
JACK: [sings]
I'm back, I'm back
ALL (except JACK): [sings]
He's back, he's back
JACK: [sings]
I'm back, I'm back
ALL (except JACK): [sings]
He's back, he's back...
(The team begin to head offstage, one by one. IANTO is the last to leave - he glances back at JACK before he disappears, as if to make sure JACK is still there.)
JACK: I really am home.
(Familiar music begins for JACK's song reprise.)
['Darkness of the Dead: Reprise']
JACK: [sings]
Brightness greets you
Lights up life around you
Colours glisten
Blind me with their splendour
Now I can break free
From the hold death has on me
I can break free from
The pain that I have felt
I'm conquering the darkness of the dead
It's Ianto that makes me feel this way
We've beaten the darkness of the dead!
(The song fades as IANTO re-enters the Hub. IANTO hesitates, not sure whether he's ready to be alone with JACK, but takes a deep breath. BOTH remain on opposite sides of the stage.)
IANTO: Are you... okay, Jack?
JACK: (smiling softly)
Yeah. I am.
IANTO: (whispers)
That's... good.
JACK: So about that date -
IANTO: Er - now's not really the time -
JACK: I want to make this work, Ianto. I'll do everything to make it right between us.
IANTO: Sir -
JACK: I'm serious, Ianto. I... I love you.
(IANTO is rendered speechless, and a familiar jazzy beat starts up.)
['The Name On Everybody's Lips Is Gonna Be Ianto!: Reprise']
JACK: [sings]
The name that will be on my lips
forever is... Ianto!
(JACK begins to click his finger and dance his way across the stage towards IANTO.)
The only man I want to kiss
- and then some more! - Ianto!
I'm gonna turn on the charm for you
That means sifting through every last trick!
I'm gonna use my pheromones
My hair, my eyes, my grin, my - quick wits!
(IANTO facepalms at the intended rhyming innuendo, probably to hide the blush on his cheeks. JACK is undeterred and continues trying to seduce IANTO with his song.)
I'm giving up my TARDIS dream
I'm here with you, Ianto!
Who says that I can't fall in love?
And yes, I know I'm screwed - both ways!
But I'll love you for all my days...
Ianto Jones!
(The song finishes with a few snazzy beats which ends with JACK on his knees in front of IANTO with his arms open wide, not unlike OWEN had posed after singing his version of the song. IANTO is fighting a grin.)
IANTO: I appreciate that sir, thanks.
(A look of horror crosses over JACK's face.)
JACK: But - Ianto! - I just told you that I -
IANTO: - I love you too.
(A beat.)
JACK: Oh, thank god.
(Soft music plays, and JACK stands up, now only inches away from IANTO.)
['Jack is Back: Reprise']
JACK: [sings]
My dearest Ianto... you know it's true
I think this is well overdue
Three months, for you, to be exact
(IANTO and JACK creep closer to each other, so that their noses are almost brushing.)
IANTO & JACK: [sing]
We'll be together, as long as ever
For it is plain as anyone can see
We're simply meant to be
(Finally, JACK and IANTO kiss, as the music swells dramatically, and then fades into a beautiful, slow piano finish. They eventually break apart.)
IANTO: (breathless)
Don't think I'll ever get used to that.
JACK: (equally breathless)
Good.
IANTO: The others will be back soon... why don't you head up to your office, and I'll make some coffee?
JACK: Ianto and coffee in my office... sounds like a match made in heaven!
(JACK gives IANTO one more quick kiss before bounding up the spiral staircase to his office. JACK sits at his desk, half-heartedly looking through paperwork, but the audience's focus is on IANTO. The lights in the Hub dim until the main source of light follows IANTO to the coffee machine, where he is once again making coffee for the team - his team.)
['Jones, Ianto Jones: Reprise']
IANTO: [sings]
I'm Jones, Ianto Jones, and I am Torchwood
I know this is where I'm supposed to be
I've found my place within this team of ours
It's not just to make coffee and tea
Looking back, things could have turned out differently
I've had my share of pain and heart break
But it took time to become who I am
Now at least, I know that I'm not fake
Didn't it hurt...?
Wasn't it hard...?
Now that I've ended
up being scarred?
But in the end it seems
Everything was worth it
Worth taking all the hits
I have done so well!
(IANTO pours coffee into five mugs, and gets them ready on a tray. As he sings, he walks around distributing GWEN's, TOSH's and OWEN's mugs to their empty desks.)
After Lisa, I thought I would leave this place
Make a fresh start somewhere far from here
But somehow Torchwood's always been my home
That fact, I see now, is crystal clear
Now I see the team actually needs me
My job is important, I've got lots to give
And not to mention, now that Jack is back
I have so many reasons to live
Wasn't it tough...?
Didn't I bleed...?
It was all worth being
finally freed
Now I can see
How it will be
With Jack back by my side
I, I will never have to hide!
Now I can see!
(IANTO begins walking up the spiral staircase towards JACK's office, with only two coffee mugs left.)
But in the end it seems
Everything was worth it
Worth taking all the hits
I have done so well!
It took time to become who I am
But I have done so well!
(Song ends, and the stage lights lift. IANTO reaches up to knock on JACK's door, but just as he is about to do so, an alarm sounds from TOSH's rift monitor.)
JACK: (leaping up from his desk excitedly)
Yes! Rift activity!
(He bounds out of his office, almost colliding with IANTO.)
IANTO: (dryly)
No need to sound too happy about it.
JACK: Come on, Ianto... it's just what we do.
(The first notes of 'Day In The Life Of Torchwood' are played. As each sings their first line, TOSH, OWEN & GWEN arrive on stage one by one.)
['Day In The Life Of Torchwood: Reprise']
TOSH: [sings]
Running 'round in the dark, waking up before dawn
OWEN: [sings]
Eternally tracking all that the Rift sends us
GWEN: [sings]
It's not pretty work – our clothes even get torn
(JACK runs down the spiral staircase.)
JACK: [sings]
Well, what's wrong with that? Can't you see it's a plus?
(IANTO, rolling his eyes, abandons his tray of coffees, and sings the chorus.)
IANTO: [sings]
Because that's who we are, and that's what we do
It's our job to protect all of you
Oh yes we protect you all through and through
That is just who we are, what we do!
TOSH: [sings]
The big question is Why? I'm not sure that I know
OWEN: [sings]
Chasing aliens 'round Cardiff? How could it not be fun?!
GWEN: [sings]
And when we can't find them? Oh, we search high and low
JACK: [sings]
But if they find you first, you must be ready to run!
(IANTO joins the team down on the ground floor, and ALL move to the front of the stage.)
ALL: [sings]
Because that's who we are, and that's what we do
Most of you don't even have a clue
Don't even know that you need a rescue
If you did, you would think it's untrue
That is just who we are, what we do!
That's who we are, and that's what we do
That's who we are, and that's what we do
That's who we are, and that's what we do
That's who we are, and that's what we do
We are Torchwood, yes we are Torchwood!
(Song ends with ALL striking poses in front of the audience. The curtain falls, and cue the audience's applause. The song's melody continues as the curtain rises again. The stage is empty, and one by one, each actor runs onstage to take a bow. The two MARA-FAIRIES, two VILLAGERS, the CHIEF VILLAGER (is that a boo from the audience?), six blue ALIENS, MAJOR ZOAN (taking his time, of course), the BLOWFISH (winking cheekily), LISA, THE DOCTOR, GWEN, OWEN, TOSH, JACK, and finally... IANTO. ALL of the cast join hands and take a final bow, and the curtain falls for the last time. The orchestra plays out the song as the house lights lift.)
THE END.
FINALLY. It only took six years, but here we are. Writing this was so damn fun, and I was so lucky to have wonderful readers to help me along my journey. I'd also like to say, if you feel like writing in a format you don't usually write in, but you're afraid of failing... GO FOR IT ANYWAY :P It's so much fun, and I grew as a writer by challenging myself to try and convey things with only dialogue and limited stage directions, and lyrics. Thank you for reading! LONG LIVE TORCHWOOD (and Ianto of course!) xx