ryu's corner: Yes, by popular(?) demand, here is a new chapter! Two days have passed, and Hetty is content to know that no one knows what she and the sole janitor know. However, can things stay this way, or is Hetty's integrity before the OSP team forever doomed? Read on...

Oh, and massive brownie points to whoever notices the reference to another NCIS:LA fic that's AMAZINGLY AWESOMETASTIC. *less-than-three*

disclaimer: Nope, don't own NCIS: Los Angeles...

Two days later, Hetty Lange was once more being swallowed by the overwhelming mountain of plush that was her spinny-chair.

Nobody knew. All was well.

If they had known, Hetty would obviously know that they knew. All day, they would have been sharing covert glances, whispering in hushed tones, and being unnaturally polite around her, all while trying to stifle smiles.

Considering that the OSP team had gotten dead drunk the other night and still hadn't quite recovered, Hetty was quite content to be sipping at a mug of herbal tea. Why on earth she had even considered a teabag that day was far beyond her grasp. She shuddered at the very memory...

"Ugh," Deeks groaned as he staggered into the bullpen-late, as usual, Hetty noted grimly. "Worst. Day. Ever."

There was a murmur of general consent from the three other pre-assembled team members.

"Spoiler alert," Callen called out. "It gets worse."

"Um, what do you-"

Deeks' eyes bulged nearly out of their sockets. Sitting on his desk was the most enormous stack of paperwork he had ever seen.

He rubbed his eyes and yes, it was still there. Hetty hid a smirk behind her mug of tea.

"Wow," he finally managed. "Who knew paperwork could breed like that?"

"You get used to it after a while," Kensi offered half-heartedly.

"...But that doesn't mean it gets any easier," Sam sighed.

Deeks seemed not to hear them, still stunned by the sheer size of the pile. "We didn't get it like this at the PD station."

Hetty's cellphone started vibrating madly, and she gave it an odd look. After a moment she picked it up and slid it in her pocket. She cleared her throat.

"Mr. Deeks," she said pointedly. "Federal agents have far more expected of them than ordinary PD officers, no offense. So, as a liaison for NCIS, more will be expected from you. Don't get comfortable.

"Now if you'll excuse me," Hetty added. "There seems to be an important call coming in from the director. Would it be too much to ask that you keep the volume down to a dull roar, please?"

An assortment of "No, ma'am"s followed the request. "Good."

With that taken care of, she picked up her tea and left.

"...Pssst!"

The team gave a collective jump. "Eric! Don't do that!"

Eric seemed to ignore the request. "Is Hetty gone?" he faux-whispered.

Kensi rolled her eyes. "Yes, Eric. What's so important that you need to scare four armed federal agents?"

Nell's head appeared from around the corner as Eric shrank back. "Well," she said, an impish smile on her face. "Eric found an...interesting anomaly in the security camera footage last night."

Callen groaned and stood wearily from his desk. "Fine," he grumbled. "We're on our way..."

"...Well?"

Eric was just standing in front of one of the giant screens in the Eagles' Nest, tablet in hand, beaming uncontrollably.

"Okay, who gave him caffeinated gum again?" Sam demanded.

Eric seemed to snap out of his trance. "Someone has caffeinated gum?" he asked eagerly.

"No, Eric," Callen interrupted, glaring. "But we do have federal issue guns, varying levels of hangovers, and very little patience. So, if you have something to show us, now would be the time."

Eric bowed his head meekly. "Okay..." Almost immediately, though, he bounced back up. "Okay! So, I was just reviewing last night's security tapes like I usually do in the morning, and I found something really weird! Someone deleted the security footage from about 2300 to 2345!"

A pause. Then, "And you brought us up here just to tell us that?" came from a very irritable Kensi.

"No wait, there's more!" Eric insisted.

His face fell suddenly when Nell plucked the tablet from his grasp. "Alrighty then," she declared. "Somebody had a little too much sugar in their Cocoa Puffs this morning, so I'll take it from here."

"But, Nell," Eric whined. "I found it first! Finders, keepers!"

"And you didn't keep your attention span long enough to focus on it. Losers, weepers.

"Anyway," she continued. "Because we're a federal agency and we're naturally paranoid and all that jazz, Eric developed a program to have all security camera footage in this building fed directly to his laptop in real time."

"So, we know what happened during that forty-five minute period?" Deeks verified.

"Exactly," Nell smirked. "And I'm putting it up on the big screen...now!"

With a slide of her finger, Nell dragged the video on the tablet and flung it up onto the big screen, where it started to play.

They were not prepared.

The team immediately recognized the tune that was blaring in the background-Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance", in all its creepy weirdness. The team immediately recognized Hetty, positioned in the middle of the bullpen. It took only a moment for their alcohol-soaked brains to make the connection between the two.

Deeks, surprisingly, was the first one to react. He doubled over in a loud, wheezy laugh. "Ohmigod!" he barely managed. "She's...it's..."

Kensi was doing her best to stifle her own laugh. Her best wasn't enough. She involuntarily snorted, which only caused Deeks to laugh even harder, and finally cracked open Sam's stoic mask. Only Callen was able to keep himself from laughing, but a wide, almost wolfish grin had spread across his face. He just shook his head repeatedly.

"That's not even the end," Eric interjected, and his finger hovered briefly over the fast-forward button on his remote...

"It is for you, Mr. Beal."

Everyone fell silent immediately, froze, and then slowly looked down. Standing in the doorway to the Eagles' Nest was Hetty herself, and she was not pleased in the slightest.

"My office, Mr. Beal. Now," she said curtly. If Eric had been a dog, his tail would have been tucked between his legs as he scampered out the door.

"As for the rest of you..." Hetty added grimly. "This. Never. Happened." To prove her point, she slid her finger across her throat menacingly before following after Eric.

The entire room was eerily silent for no less than ten seconds before Deeks suddenly burst into another fit of raucous laughter.

"It's so funny! ...Because she... Gaga...!"

Shooting the liaison wary glances, the rest of the team filed out of the room in single file. This event would certainly never be spoken of again.

...Well, at least, not in the office.

"...Hey...guys, wait! Where are you going? Wait up!"

~fin~