Hawke manor was silent, save the crackling of the fireplace beside the bed. Two men lay spawled unashamedly naked amongst the sheets, the warmth from the fire and their recent activities making it next to impossible to lie beneath the blankets. They were the Champion of Kirkwall and his lover, an elf recently freed from slavery, both in the literal and metaphorical sense.

However, the latter had something new on his mind and while it was not nearly as grave a matter as Danarius had been, it worried him all the same.

"You do realise that when Anders said, 'someone more open-minded,' he was talking about himself?" Fenris murmured thoughtfully as he lay settled amongst the pillows, Hawke nestled comfortably against his side. The pause that followed was a loaded one, and Fenris' muscles tautened as a sense of nervousness washed over him. "Three years is a long time. Did something happen between you and him?"

Hawke lifted his head slowly and rolled onto his stomach, his body stretched out across Fenris's. He was heavy, but he supported his weight on his own arms well enough that he didn't crush the elf beneath him. "Define 'something'," he said, squinting down at Fenris.

"Did you sleep with him?"

"No." Hawke shook his head quickly, but Fenris didn't miss the fleeting wistful look that passed over his face. "Anders and I... look, I'll admit it. There was... something there but I never acted on it. I might have done, maybe, but Anders is-"

"Possessed?" Fenris cut in, trying to keep the spiteful tone out of his voice for Hawke's sake and failing anyway.

Hawke sighed and gave Fenris a withering look of disapproval. "No," he said, pushing himself off of Fenris and shifting to sit cross-legged beside him. "He's... sweet." Fenris propped himself up on his elbows and raised his eyebrow at Hawke. "He is! I know when he's ranting on about mages and how persecuted we are, he can seem a little..."

"I could offer a dozen endings to that sentence, but I have the strangest feeling like you wouldn't appreciate any of them."

"No, I probably wouldn't," Hawke agreed, folding his hands in his lap and sighing. "The point is, after that night you left, I got closer to him. It was easier with him than with you. I suppose it helped that we're both mages - we bonded over our shared contempt for the templars. Our friendship- we-" He cut off and ran a hand back through his hair roughly, squeezing his eyes shut. "He smiled so easily when we were together. Given everything he's going through, everything he's fighting against... the fact I could make him smile like that-"

Fenris sat up, pulling the sheets over his lap before he spoke. "If you two were that close, why aren't you with him now?" he asked, glowering at the fireplace.

"I was falling in love with him, Fenris," Hawke replied softly, his gaze fixed on his lover's face. "But- I was already in love with you." Fenris' gaze dropped to the sheets and his expression wavered. "I wasn't sure if anything would happen between us again - I tried talking to you so many times about that night but you always refused to discuss it. Honestly, its probably just as well you did. If you'd told me that nothing was ever going to happen between us again, I would have gone to Anders. But... because everything between us remained unresolved, I was afraid to get involved with Anders on the off chance that one day you'd tell me that what happened between us three years ago had meant something to you too."

He reached out and caught Fenris's chin gently, turning his head towards him. Fenris kept his eyes lowered for a moment, his nose scrunched up like it did when he was irritated - a surprisingly adorable expression that Hawke often went out of his way to earn - before finally giving in and looking up at Hawke. "Why? What would have happened if you had been with Anders when I had come to you?"

"I wouldn't have been able to choose between the two of you. I probably would have lost you both."

Fenris frowned and lowered his gaze again, but this time he leaned forward, pressing his forehead aganist Hawke's. "At least you're honest."

Shrugging, Hawke gave an awkward little laugh. "Yeah, well, I'm an awful liar. What other choice do I have?"

"That is true," Fenris mused, raising his hand to trail his fingertips across Hawke's collarbone thoughtfully. "And what about now? What if Anders comes to you now that you're with me?"

Hawke hesitated long enough for Fenris to pull away from him, a look of confusion and hurt flooding his expression. Realising his mistake, Hawke shook his head slowly and touched Fenris' cheek. "I won't leave you, Fenris. I would never do that to you. Whatever feelings I might have for Anders... they are nothing compared to how I feel about you. I love you."

Fenris looked away, silent as he thought. Just as Hawke began to think the damage he had done was worse than he realised, however, Fenris turned back to him and in the same movement lunged forward to kiss him. It was fierce, and possessive and Hawke's surprise gave Fenris enough of an upperhand to push him back on the bed. As they curled around each other, clawing and biting and carressing, it occurred to Hawke that perhaps he was a better liar than he'd been led to believe.