Author's note: I am not the writer of the Twilight series, and the following never happened in any of the four books. This is just messing around with a subject I find interesting. If corporal punishment offends or upsets you, please do not read my story; I don't intend to distress anyone.

Alice and I sat on the wrap-around porch half-heartedly discussing our favorite modern music. My sister was currently ranking her preferred playlist. I was trying to feign interest but inwardly, I was sulking.

Minutes ago, Nessie had been sitting beside me sharing a new song on her iPod. She had kept one earphone in her right ear and offered me the left. And even though I could hear the song without the device, I had accepted. It tethered her to me, and these days I desperately grasped at anything that would connect me to this beautiful daughter, who would be leaving home sooner than I would like think about.

I had tried to act nonchalant, but when she asked me to take a listen, I was thrilled to have her near. Her soft alto shyly chanted along with the song, and I couldn't help but smile contentedly.

"Oh, I know this song," Alice had chimed in and joined the singing. The truth was, she had heard herself singing this duet in a vision, which was how she knew the lyrics.

And then my enchantment had been interrupted.

When I had heard the wolf's thoughts getting nearer, I didn't mention his impending arrival. I hadn't wanted to say anything to distract Nessie, to cause her to leave me.

My daughter, chronologically just three years of age, was a young woman now. Her relationship with Jacob had recently turned more…er, romantic. With my mind reading and Jake being a young man… Well, it was awkward for me and embarrassing for the kids. And to be honest, the intensified bond between the two infuriated me.

Without verbally discussing the reasons why, we agreed it would be best if Jacob didn't live with us at the moment. Neither was Renesmee ready to leave us yet. She certainly was too young to be married. And over my dead body was she going off with him without a marriage! Bella said I was being too old-fashioned, but I think she was secretly relieved by my horse-and-buggy traditions. None of us were quite ready for Nessie to grow up.

Physiologically, Jake could not be away from her, so each day he came and she was stuck under his arm. I hadn't been willing for my turn to be over yet, but what did that matter? Of course, as soon as he pulled up to the house on his motorcycle, Ness had left my side immediately.

After a time of comparing favorite songs, Alice and I left to give the two young people their privacy. Bella was inside working on a paper for her Peace and Conflict Resolution class at the university. Jasper was giving his professional opinion when we walked in, and then the four of us entertained a discussion about peace in the Middle East. It was unrealistic to presume that a sit-down chat would stop the violence.

"Unless I were present," Jasper amended. "Of course, then I could influence the leaders to get along."

Alice's brow furrowed and she glanced warily at me. I instantly scanned her mind to discover that she wasn't reacting to our discourse on peace.

"Oh, no they don't," I vowed loudly.

"Edward, nothing's going to happen," she pointed out.

"That's because I'm not letting it happen." Then I was out the door, leaving Alice to answer Bella's and Jasper's raised eyebrows.

Alice couldn't accurately see the future with Renesmee and Jacob around, but she could sometimes discern the consequences of their decisions if it involved another of us. A moment ago, she saw me reacting negatively to Nessie's disobedience. I decided in response to confront the girl before the misbehavior was played out.

I strode out purposefully to where Jake and Nessie were getting on his bike. The irritation I felt earlier flared brilliantly into anger. That bike was a sort of symbol for me, and one I didn't appreciate. It represented Bella separate from me, out from under my protection—choosing him over me. To see my daughter climbing onto the back of it…

Jasper could sense my fury and he tried to calm me. The irony of our previous "conflict resolution" conversation was not lost on the inside audience. Was this tension between Jake and I predestined? Like Israel and Palestine, would we always fight over what property we both thought was rightly ours?

"No," I said with finality, putting an authoritative hand in between the handlebars.

"Don't worry, Edward," Jacob placated. "I'm just taking her down the drive. We won't go on the highway."

"I don't care."

"Nessie wanted a ride—"

"No," I interrupted, shaking my head. I turned toward my daughter. "No motorcycles. You know that."

Jacob was confused. If there was any possibility that Nessie could be hurt, he wouldn't have agreed to do it.

Renesmee was scowling at me. She was organizing her thoughts to give me a piece of her mind. Mostly I gave her whatever she wanted, but she was quite used to my ultimatums and I didn't intimidate her in the least. Naturally, I tried to control my family—I had even tried to parent Bella during our courtship. I was aware that Nessie, like her mother, was an expert at "handling" me.

"Renesmee, stop," I warned. "Just don't."

Or what? she silently challenged.

"I'll send you to your room."

She rolled her eyes at me. Oh, not my room! she thought sarcastically. Her mouth opened to respond as such, but I cut her off.

"Or I'll spank you," I qualified without thinking it through. From inside I sensed Alice's inward groan.

A blush immediately spread across Ness's cheeks and she narrowed her eyes at me. She was angry and embarrassed that I would suggest that to her. Jacob and I watched as she stormed into the house with a clenched jaw.

"Where's she going?" Jake asked.

"She's going to tell on me."

"Tell on you?" To who? Carlisle?

"Her mother."

Jacob chuckled. "Girls," he muttered with amusement. "Really, Edward, you know I wouldn't let her get hurt. Maybe another time… I could get her a helmet if that makes you feel better."

"No. No other time," I said bluntly.

"Sure, sure," he said, distracted by Nessie's departure. "Hey, I didn't know you spank Ness."

"I don't," I assured him. "I wouldn't do that. I was just saying," I admitted. "I don't know why I said it…. But I mean it, no motorcycles."

"Hey… If I ever break your rules, would you spank me?" Jacob asked, smiling. Oddly enough, he didn't object to that idea. He wasn't completely averse to the idea of me spanking Nessie, either. He was actually intrigued by the thought. Pervert.

I shook my head, irritated. I didn't need any ideas; my first instinct when angry was to destroy the object of my wrath. I didn't need to permit myself the release—or even the fantasy—of beating Jake. "Now that would be an excellent way to make Renesmee hate me."

"She could never hate you. She worships you." Jacob was being truthful.

"Well, the feeling's mutual." I smiled. Inside I could hear Nessie protesting, "…he said it in front of Jacob!" My smile disappeared. Thank goodness Esme and Rosalie were not home. I didn't need Rose ganging up on me to join "Team Renesmee."

"What would you spank her with?" Jake asked suddenly.

"What? Jake—I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Well, you know. My mom used to smack me with a wooden spoon."

The thought of hitting Nessie with an object made me feel an awful ache in my chest. I was certain my hand would cause damage enough. "I just told you I wouldn't spank her."

"But you told her you would. What if—"

"I'm not going to spank her," I said with exasperation. Then I sighed sadly. "But I may be the one being told to bend over. Come on. I need to go in and face the disciplinary committee."