Disclaimer: I don't own CSI:NY.
Series: 'Kindred Spirits'. There is a full list of stories on my profile.
Spoilers: The Box.
The Box
"I hate cases involving kids."
Jess glanced up from her paperwork, seeing Don drop into his chair, massaging his head. "I know." She put her pen down. "How bad?"
"Oh, we've got him back alive." Don assured her. "But … that poor kid's lost his mother and was kidnapped by a psychopath."
"At least he's alright." Jess commented. "I assume his grandparents are going to raise him."
Don nodded absently. "Yeah."
Jess knew he wasn't comforted by this thought, but didn't press the subject, waiting until they had left the precinct. As agreed, they had done nothing to indicate that their relationship had changed in any way, and they parted with a smile in the parking lot.
Twenty minutes later, Jess opened her door to let Don in and he kissed her softly.
"How did I manage?" He murmured against her lips.
"Manage what?" Jess asked, pushing the door shut behind him.
Don shrugged, cupping her face and pressing another desperate kiss to her lips. "I'm practically going through withdrawal, not being able to kiss you all day; I'm just wondering how I managed before."
Jess smiled. "You know why we …"
"I know, Jess." Don assured her. "And I'm fine with keeping it quiet. Even if we weren't, I still wouldn't kiss you at work; it's unprofessional." He squeezed her hand, tugging her over to her couch. "Good day?"
Jess shrugged. "Lots of paperwork and phone calls. How bad was yours?"
"It wasn't bad …" Don trailed off with a sigh. "Nicole Harris was willing to sell her baby."
Jess sighed. "God, I can't imagine being that desperate."
"What happened to good old-fashioned adoption?" Don asked. "At least that way you know your child won't end up with Mr. and Mrs. Crazy."
"They killed her?" Jess guessed.
"Yeah." Don sighed. "Took us ages to realise the baby wasn't theirs and then she locked herself in a gas station bathroom with him."
"God, that's awful." Jess shook her head, moulding herself against his side with a shiver.
Don chuckled lightly, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, tracing patters on her arm. "Cold?"
"A little." Jess admitted. "I swear Christmas was warmer than this."
Don kissed her forehead, his other hand sliding over her thigh to grip her waist. "Want me to warm you up?"
Jess sniggered as he pulled her onto his lap. "You've got a one-track mind."
"I told you, Jess; I'm going through withdrawal." Don murmured, winding the hand that had been stroking her arm into her hair.
Jess wasn't about to complain and sank into the embrace, sighing contentedly into his mouth. Like her boyfriend, she also hadn't anticipated missing him so much while he was sitting right across from her. He was right; it was like an addiction and he wasn't the only one concerned about withdrawal.
"I missed you." Don whispered, as they parted for air. "I know it sounds weird …"
"It doesn't." Jess assured him. "I missed you too."
Don sighed. "It shouldn't be this difficult."
"It won't stay like this." Jess stated confidently. "We just need to adjust to losing half our reason not to make out at work."
"What was the other half?" Don asked, half curiously, half teasingly.
"Well, I don't know about yours, but mine was fear." Jess admitted, almost shyly.
"And here I thought your biggest fear was spiders." Now he was teasing her.
"No." Jess shook her head. "My biggest fear is losing you."
Don's smile faded into a more serious expression. "I'm not going anywhere, sweetheart. I know our job's dangerous but …"
"I'm not scared of losing you to the job." Jess cut him off. "Although, yeah, that does scare me. What really scares me is just the thought of losing you altogether."
"I'm not going anywhere." Don repeated, kissing her softly. "Why does that scare you so much?"
"It'll sound stupid." Jess warned.
"Try me." Don challenged. "Talk it out, Detective, or this is gonna eat you."
Jess took a shaky breath. "I've been hurt once." She held up a hand, anticipating his protest before he'd even opened his mouth. "Let me finish."
Don nodded with a sigh.
"I've been hurt once." Jess repeated. "I don't know how I felt about Philip, but it already pales in comparison with how I feel about you. This has the potential to hurt me so badly that …"
Don cut her off, kissing her hard. "If I ever," he said in a low voice, pulling away, "hurt you in any way, I want you to shoot me. I know you said you were over it when you first told me about that bastard, but I saw pain in your eyes anyway and I never, ever want to be the cause of that."
Jess smiled weakly. "Shooting you would be the least of your problems."
"I know." Don told her. "Believe me, I know. I just need you to know that I …"
"I know." Jess assured him. "I never said it was a rational fear."
"It's not irrational, Jess." Don whispered. "That bastard broke your heart, Jess; it makes sense that you'd be wary about giving it away again." He tugged on her waist so she settled beside him, her legs still lying over his, and tucked her head under his chin, kissing her forehead as he did. "Difference is, Jess, I know how damn lucky this makes me."
"No." Jess disagreed. "That's not …"
"It is, Jess." Don insisted. "Even with the slight addiction that comes with it."
Jess laughed. "No, Don. I know better than to try and argue with you on that point, even if I do think you're exaggerating. What I was going to say was: That's not the only difference between you and I'm grateful for that." She smiled up at him. "Now can we change the subject?"
"With pleasure." Don grinned. "To what?"
Jess smirked. "Well, Detective, I do believe we were in the middle of fixing those withdrawal symptoms."
"So we were." Don murmured, his hand sliding into her hair again. He brushed his lips against hers once, twice, until she let out an impatient groan and he pulled her into a deep kiss, smirking against her skin as he gave in to her wishes, not that he was ever really going to try to resist her.
Not anymore.
Her confession had hurt a little bit, however much he knew her fears weren't irrational, and he made a silent promise to himself then and there that she would never have to think like that ever again.
Because he knew that the day she walked into his life, she turned his life around. Without her, he knew, his recovery would have been hampered by his own pride, pushing away all those who tried to help him.
But Jess had propped him up and supported him, all somehow without him realising that she was doing so, for which he was grateful, since he had no doubt that he would have tried to push her away if he had.
Jess pulled away, dropping another brief kiss on his lips as she did. "What are you thinking, Detective?"
"What makes you think I'm thinking anything?" Don teased.
Jess raised an eyebrow. "Because even before we were dating, if you were thinking hard about something, you'd draw patterns on my shirt. Back then it was just a hug though. It's always the same pattern though." She demonstrated by tracing figure eights on his chest. "I told you mine; you tell me yours."
Don chuckled. "There's nothing wrong, Jess. I was just reminding myself of how lucky I am to have you, in general, not just like this. There's no telling where I'd be if you hadn't turned up." He didn't give her a chance to argue, pulling her back into a searing kiss.
Jess gave another sigh of content, melting against him. Privately, she was sure she was the lucky one, but the best way to prove that was to keep quiet and stay exactly where she was.
AN: Okay, I wasn't thinking things through when I wrote 'The Triangle' last year, because I had Jess only just finding out about Lindsay's pregnancy, which made this oneshot very difficult to write, so I hope it worked. Review please!