All the Twilight characters belong to Stephanie Meyer.

Moments © Irenella Courmett 2010.

Warning, Rated M.

And thank you to our beta obessedmom for all her hard and great work.

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Moments
Chapter One
By Crash Hale
Jasper POV

"Daddy!" Bella yelled, jumping up and down with her arms reaching up.

I smiled at my little girl and reached down to lift her into my arms, "Whoa, baby, you're such a big girl." She was bigger each time I saw her. And so beautiful. I kissed her cheek and she giggled.

"She's been waiting by the door for the last hour," I heard Alice say and turned to her, offering a smile.

She smiled in return. "I'm making dinner," she said before disappearing into the kitchen again.

"Daddy's got presents for you, baby, let's put them under the tree," I told my youngest.

"Yeah, with all the others! Mama said we can open them with you tonight! Can we really? Really, really?"

"Really, really," I laughed and nodded, walking her into the living room where Alice had the tree set.

I kissed Bella's cheek once more and put her down before I placed the bag of gifts at my feet. I helped her pull the wrapped gifts out and she put them under the tree with the others.

"Dinner!" Alice called.

"Thank you, Daddy, thank you, thank you!" Bella beamed, throwing her arms around my neck.

I pulled her into my lap and asked her if she wanted me to read her the new book she'd gotten.

"Please," she responded with a nod. My baby was three and just the smartest little thing I'd ever known.

As I read to our daughter, I glanced at the women I loved. She was smiling at us, seeming content but never completely at ease. There was always that hint of sadness in her eyes that she couldn't hide from me.

Even when I tried talking to her she'd stop me, saying she knew it was the way things were and just asked me for whatever I could offer her in that moment.

That's what we were; moments.

I had another life, away from her and Bella. My real life was with Maria and our sons Emmett and Edward.

It killed me when Alice referred to herself and our daughter as my family on the side, because that is how I treated them. That is what they were.

I couldn't give them holidays like I did Maria and the boys. I gave them days here and there, even this was the closest to a holiday - Christmas eve. I knew Maria would give me shit about it because I wasn't home with our boys.

But she didn't know, she didn't know I had two other girls that were my life too. Two girls that I missed every second of every day.

It was wrong to love two women, that I knew, but it didn't stop the fact that I did. Alice just got the worse end of the deal, and she loved me too, which only made it harder on her. Maybe if she hated me she could find someone else to make her happy and give her everything I couldn't.

Someone like that goddam best friend of hers that I knew was in love with her. I hated him, with a passion. He had what I didn't. He spent holidays with my girls and my daughter loved him. She loved her Uncle Jamie. He spent more time with them then I even dreamed of. He had what was mine.

And maybe if Alice pushed me away, she'd see that he wanted more. She'd see that he probably wanted my daughter to call him her dad.

"She's asleep," Alice spoke softly.

I stopped reading and looked to my shoulder to see my daughter peacefully asleep against it. I kissed the top of her head and stood carefully so I wouldn't wake her.

I went to her bedroom and tucked her in. Alice entered and kissed her forehead goodnight and I did the same, turning in time to see her walking away from the room.

I gave Bella another look and sighed. I'd be gone before she woke up, and I'd miss her until I got the chance to see her again.

I walked down the hallway where I knew Alice had gone. She was sitting on the edge of her bed, looking down into her lap.

I closed the door and came to sit beside her, taking her hand from her lap and bringing it to my lips.

The guys all laughed, agreeing tonight was a good show. I joined in, but our sexy little waitress definitely didn't go unnoticed by me.

She was stunning, and her voice so sweet when she took our orders. Her smile alone brightening up this shitty little diner.

I slid out of the booth without anyone stopping me and went to the counter where she was.

"I'm sorry, did you guys need something else?" she smiled.

"They're fine, don't worry."

"Oh... Okay," she smiled, glancing in their direction and then back to me.

"Alice, right?" I asked.

"Right,"

"When do you get off, Alice?"

She frowned, "Why?"

"Wondering if you wanted to join me after your shift?" I offered a charming smile I knew most women couldn't resist. I was a famous musician, most women couldn't resist me even if they tried.

"And why would I want to do that?"

I pulled my eyebrows together in confusion and she tried to hide a big smile. I smiled again too.

"Oh, you just really do."

She watched me for a second before finally responding to my question, "You're my last table."

I became cocky, "Always works."

"What always works?" this time she seemed confused.

"Being a rock star," I said matter-of-factly.

She laughed. She laughed. "Okay," she rolled her eyes.

"Wait," I held my hand up, "You don't know me?" That would be a first.

"Nope, sorry, I'm only leaving with you because of your good looks."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously I don't know you? Yeah." She shrugged, "So, are you going to tell your friends to leave so I can take this apron off or what?"

I smiled, still a little stunned and nodded, yelling across the empty diner for them to clear out.

They all grumbled and a few of the guys gave me the finger but headed out after leaving money on the table.

Alice reached for my hand and caught me a little off guard, feeling my wedding band. "Married?" she asked.

"With children," I responded. I know it's strange, but wearing the wedding band rather than hiding it actually attracted more women than it did repel.

She nodded and pulled her hand away, taking the apron off.

"How old are you, darlin'?" I asked. She looked young and I didn't need to be getting with someone under age.

"Eighteen."

She pulled my hand along with hers as she brought them before her, tracing my wedding band like she had the first night. But so much had happened since then. A lot could happen in four years. And it did. Both our lives changed.

I began seeing Alice every chance I got, leaving Maria alone at home with our twin boys and saying I had a show or some other bullshit.

Alice became pregnant and had our daughter a short year after meeting, and here we were now. Her raising Bella without me. Sharing a night together here and there.

She was just so beautiful and amazing that I couldn't help but love her. I couldn't help but be happy when she placed Bella into my arms a day after her birth. I didn't even mind James' presence that day, knowing he'd been with her when I couldn't. I knew she was scared to give birth and I was glad at least someone was with her to tell her everything was okay and that she did perfectly.

Even though I never saw James again after that day, I knew how close he was to them. I knew because of Bella, because of the way she spoke about him. She loved him too, and even though I wanted her to have all the love in the world, James' made me jealous.

I intertwined my fingers with Alice's, her eyes moving away from my ring and to my face. I shifted us around and she lay back as I moved above her. I pushed her long dark hair from her face and leaned in to softly kiss her lips.

Her fingers tangled themselves in my hair as she spread her legs to help better fit me in our current position.

"God, I miss you when you're not here," she whispered.

I knew how hard it was for her to say things like that so I just nodded, moving in to kiss her soft lips.

"I'm here," I whispered in return.

She moaned into my mouth as soon as I kissed her again, pulling back to push her shirt up her chest.

She broke the kiss, quickly lifting her shirt off to reveal a lacy bra and more of her creamy white skin. She helped me remove my own shirt and I made quick work of her yoga pants.

She lay propped up on her elbows in her underwear while I stood off the bed and got completely undressed. She watched me all the while, laying back when I reached for her panties and pulled them down her legs. She reached behind herself and unhooked her bra, dropping it to the side of the bed.

I grew even harder at the sight of her beauty and moved back over her, kissing her shoulders and chest while I felt up her thighs and she finally hooked her legs up around my lower back.

"I love you so much," I whispered to her, sucking her earlobe into my mouth gently then trailing wet kisses down her neck.

She moaned and pressed her chest up against mine, making me smile as I brought my hands up her sides and took both her full breasts into my hands.

"My beautiful girl," I said against her warm skin, always wishing it to be true.

"Jasper?" Her voice was low and quiet and I nodded with my face between her breasts as I kissed there. "Please, I want you,"

I looked up into her stunning yet sad eyes and moved in to kiss her, reaching between us and taking myself into my hand before rubbing the head up and down her wet core. I pushed into her and groaned as she moaned, her nails digging into my ass cheeks.

I began my long hard thrusts into her while she clawed up my back and held onto my shoulders, moving my kisses down her jaw as she threw her head back.

"I need you," I told her lowly. She didn't understand how much so. I felt a connection to her that was like any other. It was different to the one I had with Maria. I loved my wife, I loved her so deeply and she'd been my world for so long... but then Alice came along and that world suddenly got a whole lot bigger.

Alice whispered, "Faster."

I pulled back from her neck and watched her as I hooked the back of her knees over my arms so I could get inside her deeper and easier than before.

"Oh, god," she threw her head back again, closing her eyes and holding onto my forearms as I started up harder and faster thrusts. "Yeah, there."

Seeing her this way, how much she enjoyed this sinful thing we shared, I pulled her leg up against my chest and kissed her thigh, watching her face as she looked at me for a second before her own hand came up into her hair and she tugged as her whole body shook and she clenched around my length.

This was the only time she ever was at ease around me anymore. I knew it killed her as much as it did me every time I left.

She gave a satisfied smile and made me happy for a second. I wanted her smiling all the time, and hated myself for not being able to ensure that. I was a horrible person. I knew that. I lived with that.

She indicated she wanted her legs down and I complied, giving her a smile when she pushed on my chest and I rolled onto my back so she could be on top. I loved her on top, watching her. I could watch her for days and never tire of the sight.

She pressed her hands against my chest and I gripped her hips, helping her along even though she knew damn well how to ride me and drive me insane. I fought off wanting to come, feeling my dick twitch inside her.

She smiled and leaned down. I wrapped my arm around her waist and brought the other into her long hair as we kissed and I got her into a position where she couldn't move, thrusting up into her as she broke the desperate kiss and breathed against my face.

She came undone again with a small, "Oh, yes," and I followed, unable to hold off a second longer.

My body relaxed as she rested above me, then slowly moved after a second and walked into the bathroom.

I lay there until she returned, slipping a shirt on and new pair of panties. I got off the bed and put my boxer briefs back on too.

"Hey," I wrapped an arm around her waist from behind and kissed her shoulder.

"Hey," she whispered, letting her head drop back against my chest.

"Let's lay down," I said, walking her back to the bed already.

She pulled the covers back and crawled in. I followed behind, pushing her long hair behind her ear and moving in to kiss her. I could never get enough, not knowing how long it would be until the next one.

She held onto me and kissed me back with so much need and want it broke my heart not to be able to tell her I'd always be here. How could I be two people? In two places at once? I needed my boys and Maria as much as I needed my two girls.

Yes, I knew I was the asshole in this whole thing, no matter which way you were to look at it.

"I love you," she whispered against my lips, the kiss continuing.

I held her to me closely and she finally pulled away from this kiss, "Love you too, darlin', always."

She nodded and sighed, "Don't go yet."

I kissed her forehead and pulled her against my chest. "I'm here."

She snuggled into my chest and held onto me tightly. I stroked her hair all along, kissing the top of her head gently every once in awhile until she was asleep.

When I was sure of it because her hold on me was no longer tight, I slowly pulled away, being careful not to wake her when I moved her. She sighed in her sleep and snuggled against the pillow my head had just been on.

I fought not to just say fuck it and stay until morning before redressing and giving her one more kiss.

I left her bedroom and walked back into my baby's room again, kneeling beside her bed and watching my girl sleep peacefully. If angels were real, I knew they'd look just like her. She defined pureness and goodness, no matter what she came from. The things her father did didn't taint her innocence.

She'd grow up into a beautiful woman some day, and I knew she'd hate me for all the wrong I'd done by her and her mother, especially since she'd been born. But for now, she loved me. And I'd love her until the day I die, no matter what happened.

I kissed her chubby little cheek and inhaled her fresh scent, kissing the top of her head next and leaving through her door with a heavy heart.

I made my way out into the driveway and opened the car door, reaching into the back seat and pulling out what I had planned for them.

When I was back inside, by the dinning room table, I placed the large envelope down containing all they'd need - plane tickets, unlimited park entry tickets, the hotel reservations under her name, a letter explaining how I just wanted her and Bella to have some fun at Disney World together and money for whatever she may want or need.

I had an account Maria didn't know about, an account I used to give Alice money every month because I wanted her to live comfortably without having to worry about financial shit. I had the money to provide that for her at least. But I still left her money every time I saw her, just needing to do the only thing I could.

I looked around once more, going over to the fireplace and smiled at all the pictures of Bella lined up. I traced my fingers over the one of her sitting in Alice's lap on a swing at the park before I locked the house up and left for my long drive back home.