"Y-you're him aren't you? You're the Goblin King." Alfred muttered in awe.

The king said nothing, but smirked and tilted his head to the side.

"I imagined you taller…" Alfred said blankly.

Really it was a little odd staring down at someone so intimidating. . .not that he was intimidated or anything anyway! . . .Shut up!

Scowling, the king did a mock bow, "Arthur." He stated, "And I guess I'll let that comment slide seeing as you're an. . .American." He spat the world out as if it were dirt.

Alfred frowned, "Well, yeah. America's like the best country ever and-Hey wait! I just want my brother back, okay?" He cried.

"Sorry. What's said is said." The King sighed.

"But I didn't mean it!"

"Oh! You didn't?" Arthur asked with a smirk, pulling at the end of his black, leather glove.

"C'mon! Where is he?" Alfred cried in desperation. Really, he just needed his little fucking brother back, no big deal!

The Goblin King smiled a knowing smile and walked up to Alfred, crossing his arms over his chest.

Oh man that chest looked absolutely fantastic. . .

Wait, what was that?

"Alfred" he began, "Go back to your room. Play with your toys and your costumes. . .forget about the baby."

That just kind of pissed the teen off. It made him sound like a child or something, playing with his dolls and playing dress up. . .

"Really now! I mean, it's super cool that you would go through all the trouble to do this for me and all but my parents will be so freaking pissed and I don't hate Matt that much so-"

"Alfred." Arthur interrupted with a smile, "I've brought you a gift." He said and held up his hand. A glass ball appeared, shining in the moonlight.

Oh boy. Alfred was always a sucker for gifts.

"What is it?" He asked suspiciously.

The king laughed and began to roll it back and forth, over his hand.

A skill that took a bit of training. . .or maybe it was something more.

Either way, Alfred has always wanted to do that.

"It's a crystal, nothing more." Arthur assured, "But if you turn it this way, look into it. . .it'll show you your dreams."

Okay, he kind of already knew what his dreams were and stuff, but still. . .being able to see them would be pretty awesome.

"But-" Arthur continued, "this is not a gift for an ordinary-" He paused, "boy. . ." (Great. The jerk had probably seen him in his dress. ) "Who takes care of a screaming baby."

It was quiet then.

Alfred started at the crystal in awe.

"Do you want it?" The Goblin King asked, offering him the ball.

Blue eyes met green then, obviously interested in such a wonderful gift.

Arthur smirked and gestured to the crystal in his hands, "Then forget the baby."

"L-Listen," Alfred finally spoke up, shaking his head irritably. Matt first gifts second! "It isn't that I don't appreciate what you're doing for me and all, its just I need my brother back. My parents are gonna be so ticked! And Matt's probably really scared and all-"

"Alfred!" The King interrupted, "You're English is atrocious." And in that instant the crystal ball was a snake, slithering menacingly in Arthur's hands, "Don't defy me." He said strictly, and threw the snake around Alfred's neck.

Alfred gasped and pulled the snake from around him, flinging it to the ground.

What was just a snake seconds ago, was suddenly a scarf.

A goblin peeked put from under it and ran off, snickering under his breath.

The room seemed to laugh then. Dozens of goblins giggled from their hiding places.

"You're no match for me Alfred." Arthur said with a laugh of his own.

"Please." Alfred said quietly, "Where is he?"

Arthur rolled his eyes and moved aside, gesturing towards the window. No one ever wanted to just hand these brats over quietly anymore. "He's there. In my castle."

A castle right outside his window? No way. Then again, all of this seemed so crazy. Why couldn't there be a castle in his back yard?

Alfred walked to his balcony and suddenly the house was gone.

About a mile in front of him was the castle, surrounded by what seemed to be a huge maze. . .a labyrinth.

"Is that. . .the castle beyond the Goblin City?" Alfred asked, his eyes never leaving the great maze.

Arthur stood a little further away, watching Alfred carefully. "Turn back Alfred. Turn back before it's too late." He mumbled ominously.

Jeez, this guy was freaking creepy! But Alfred was a hero, and no short, lanky, creepy, peterpan-tight-tights wearing king was going to keep him from getting his brother back!

Now Alfred had to say something cool and heroic! "I can't." He said firmly, turning his head to glance at the King. "Don't you understand that I can't?" Nice one.

"Such a pity." Arthur said in a not so interested tone. He didn't really sound like it was much of a pity, the jerk.

Alfred turned his head back to the maze. "It doesn't look very far." He said defiantly.

Then Arthur was next to him, looking up at Alfred with a cocky smirk. Yeah, that was actually really kinda sexy. . . "It's further than you think. Time is short." He walked back to an old, dying tree, a golden clock hung on to it's trunk, the numbers counting to thirteen.

Arthur, with a flick of his wrist, had the only hand on the clock move to the first hour. "You have thirteen hours in which to solve the labyrinth, before your baby brother becomes one of us. . ..forever."

Then Arthur seemed to disappear in thin air.

"Such a pity." His voice echoed all around the teen, sending shivers down his spine.

Alfred glanced to the clock then back to the labyrinth.

"Better get a move on then." He muttered and headed towards the walls of the maze.

Alfred entered a clearing after a hopeless search for a door into the labyrinth.

He couldn't find so much as a hole!

"This sucks." He mumbled, walking over to a dirty old pond.

It was then he noticed a figure sitting next to the edge, pouring something into the murky water.

It was an extremely large man, covered in clothes fit for winter and a scarf hanging loosely around his neck.

He was holding something and whatever it was in his hand was leaking something red and thick into the pond.

The disgusting water was turning a dark crimson.

"E-Excuse me." Alfred muttered, edging closer to the large man.

Whatever he had been holding fell into the water with a loud splash. "Oh! Excuse me!" The man sang and turned to Alfred, who was surprised to look back into beautiful violet eyes. When the stranger got a good look at him his smile seemed to get colder and wider, and his eyes darkened. "Oh, it's you." He giggled.

The man picked himself up from the water's edge and made his way to the wall surrounding the labyrinth, reaching into his large coat to pull out a long petal pipe.

"Sorry to bother you, but I need to get through this labyrinth, can you help me?" Alfred asked, eying the pipe warily the glancing back to the pond for a moment.

The stranger said nothing. Something small and white flew by Alfred and up the man and before it could even pass him by, he swung his pipe and hit the white thing head on.

"Fifty seven." He said darkly.

Alfred let out a gasp when he saw that what the thing had been was actually a fairy or something, sprawled on the ground, her wings drooping.

Being the awesome hero that he was, Alfred went to pick her up, cradling her against his chest. "What the hell?" Alfred growled towards the evil man with the pipe. The fairy looked up him, trembling in terror, tears in the corner of its eyes. It had short, curly blonde hair and was wearing along shirt. "You monster-AH!" Alfred suddenly hissed in pain and dropped the fairy to the ground.

A brown haired one with a worried expression came out and flew off with it in his arms. Had it been wearing glasses. . .?

"It bit me!" He said, astonished.

The stranger stopped and laughed. "Well, what did you expect fairies to do?"

Alfred inspected his finger warily. Could you get rabies from fairy bites? "I thought they did nice little girly things, like granting wishes and stuff."

Again the stranger laughed. Really, stop it. "Shows what you know then. Silly." Another fairy flew by and in a blink was on the ground with a possible concussion, courtesy of the jerk with the big pipe.

"Horrible." Alfred mumbled and shook his head.

The stranger stopped and turned his body to look fully at the teen. "I am not horrible. I am Ivan, a karlik. Who are you?"

"What's a car lick?" Alfred asked, ignoring the question.

Ivan's smile widened, "Karlik. And in your language, glupyi rebenok, I am called a dwarf. You did not say who you are called."

The boy ignored him, again. "Really? You're a dwarf. . .Really?" He asked incredulously. This man was not a dwarf. He was a fucking giant.

"Where I am from, you do not ask for a name without getting one in return." Ivan said with a laugh and tapped his pipe on his shoulder.

"Where the hell are you from anyway? Whatever, name's Jones. Alfred Jones." He said with a wink.

"That is what I thought." Ivan sang and began walking away.

"Oh wait, hey!" Alfred called and ran after him, jogging along by his side. This guy had some long freaking legs! "Do you know where the door to the labyrinth is by any chance?"

"Ufu~ Maybe." Ivan giggled and sped up his pace. Really, this guy giggled a lot.

"That's great!" Alfred grinned and kept to the pace easily. Ivan didn't saw a word after that.

"Well where is it?" He finally asked.

"Where is what?" Ivan wondered with a hum.

"The door." Alfred stressed.

"What door?" Ivan replied.

Alfred stopped dead in tracks, pulling at his hair. "Ug! It's hopeless asking you anything, ya' freak!"

"Not if you ask the right questions." The 'freak' said darkly.

"Jesus! How do I get into the Labyrinth?" Alfred threw his hands back down to his sides.

Ivan stopped and turned his head to glance back at the boy. Alfred could see bits of his smirk behind his long scarf. "Hmm. Now that is the right question. Really, you American's never make any sense when wording your sentences." He laughed and walked back over to Alfred.

Before Alfred could reply to the comment, Ivan had a hand on his shoulder and was turning him the opposite direction. "You get in there." He whispered into his ear and gestured towards a door on the wall that wasn't there before.

The doors opened at their mention.

Alfred could feel Ivan's breath on his neck and decided to scramble out of this odd man's clutches. Before something weird went down.

"Well. . .thanks, I guess." He muttered, never taking his gaze away from the doors. (Mainly to avoid eye contact with mister homicide next to him.)

"You guess? How rude. I suppose you are actually going in then?" Ivan asked and crossed his arms looked down at Alfred expectantly.

He nodded and glanced at Ivan from the corner of his eyes. "I kinda have to. See I wished my brother away and all that. . ."

"I see. Togda udachi, bednyaga, kolkolkol."

Alfred didn't reply, seeing as he didn't speak freak, and with his final thoughts of encouragement, walked through the huge double doors and into the dark recesses of the labyrinth.

glupyi rebenok- (russian) stupid child

Togda udachi, bednyaga- (russian) Then good luck, poor soul

A word if you please: Well, thank's so much for reding! Now, please keep in mind that I used google translator for the Russian! If I made any mistakes at all please let me know! I'll be more than happy to correct them. This one's not very great because I wanted to do a quick update...Sorry about that! But I would love to hear your thoughts! What did you all think of Ivan as Hoggle? Review! THANKS AGAIN!