This was written for a friend of mine, who's been having a few problems recently and I wanted to cheer her up. It was originally discussed simply as an excuse to put Neji in a dress, but I started writing it, realised that just putting him in a dress wasn't enough fun/humiliation for me, so I decided to make it a SasuNeji, because Sasuke is my favourite Naruto character. This is either a two or three-shot, depending on how far I take it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing that belongs to the Naruto universe. It is the property of Masashi Kishimoto, much as I'd like to deny it.

"Absolutely not."

"Come on, Neji, it's got to be you. No one else will manage it and I can't go in alone."

Neji threw Tenten a blank look and repeated "No."

"I will do it, Tenten!" Lee interrupted, in his usual enthusiastic manner "Do not worry about Neji. You and I will manage with the power of Youth!"

Tenten bit her lip and replied carefully "Don't take this the wrong way, Lee, but I don't think you could quite pass for a girl. Neji really is the only one."

"I'm also in charge of this mission and I'm not doing it."

"Come on, Hyuuga." Another voice joined the debate, an undercurrent of amusement evident despite the carefully controlled features "Don't tell me you're willing to send a girl in by herself, just because you're uncomfortable."

Neji glared at the speaker "If you're so confident, Uchiha, why don't you accompany Tenten?"

Sasuke, as it was he, responded smoothly "Because, as Tenten has said several times now, you're the only one of us who's feminine-looking enough infiltrate the place without suspicion."

If the others didn't know better, they would say that Neji was sulking. After a few minutes of standing around in silence, Sasuke quietly said, "Aren't you man enough to do it?"

That was it.

Neji jerked his head up and said "Tenten. Let's go."

Tenten grinned all over her face and followed Neji into the other room, throwing Sasuke a grateful look over her shoulder. Sasuke smiled very faintly back. He knew that jibe would work on Neji. It always did work once you got the person annoyed enough, and while Neji was about as expressive as Sasuke himself, Sasuke could always tell if he was in a state of high emotion.

Some strange kind of empathy that the two of them shared.

It had been five years since they had met in the Chuunin exams, and three years since it became apparent that despite getting on each other's nerves quite a bit (though not nearly as much as he and Naruto annoyed each other), they worked together well.

The most important thing was, of course, that it had been a year since Sasuke had worked out that he was attracted to Neji and six months since he realised it really could never work.

He was still working on getting over him.

There were loads of reasons it couldn't work. The major one being that Sasuke didn't know if Neji would even consider feeling the same way about a guy. It wasn't exactly the norm and Sasuke knew it would probably attract more attention than either he or Neji was comfortable with.

The other great reason was that both of them maintained icy personas to the rest of the outside world, and even if their friends knew it was only an act, neither would be willing to drop it and actually admit that they had feelings.

With no way of knowing whether Neji was attracted, and no way of asking, Sasuke knew that whatever they might have had was doomed.

That didn't stop a thrill running through him every time they accidentally touched.

It was half an hour before Neji and Tenten emerged, but when Sasuke saw him, he knew that it had been worth the hassle, and it would be worth the death-glares that were constantly being thrown in his direction. It took a huge amount of self-control to stop his jaw just dropping at the sight. Neji made a way too convincing girl.

His dark brown hair, already ridiculously long for a boy, had been released from the hair tie that held it back and was swinging loose, reaching below his waist. It had been brushed and the two shorter strands that usually fell loose from the ponytail he generally wore it in had been plaited and twisted back, then secured behind his head.

His eyes had been made to appear even larger and stood out from his face with the careful application of make-up, black kohl defining his eyes and mascara elongating his already long eyelashes.

The bow of his lips had been outlined by a slight use of pencil that was barely noticeable, a soft pink lipstick had been put on, emphasizing the shape of his lips, and they shone with the addition of gloss.

His skin, already so pale, had been made even more so, with just a touch of blusher on his high cheekbones, softening his face and making him look a lot younger than nineteen, as well as covering the brand on his forehead.

The crowning glory, however, was the dress.

It was in a deep red, with silver embroidery. It was tight around the waist and chest areas, which had been stuffed in order to give the impression of breasts, but hung loosely around his legs, and fell to about three inches above his knees. His legs were covered by fishnet tights and he had flat black buckled shoes on. The neckline was soft and circular, not dipping too low, but exposing all of his shoulders. The tight sleeves reached his elbows.

The dress was secured by a corset of ribbons at his waist, leaving about half of his back exposed as well, the milky coloured skin on full display.

Sasuke wondered whether it was as soft and smooth as it looked…

With that dangerous thought, Sasuke came back to his senses and belatedly realised that maybe he ought to be staring at Tenten if he didn't want to give himself away. Admittedly, she was also looking incredibly attractive; her hair that was usually tied up was naturally curly and it bounced around her shoulders. Her purple and black dress was even shorter than Neji's, the neckline far lower and she had stockings instead of tights, but she still paled in comparison to the vision that was Neji.

Lee was also speechless, switching his attention back and forth between his two long time teammates, clearly unsure of which one he should be more shocked at.

Tenten was grinning, clearly delighted at the stir she and Neji had caused, whereas Neji just kept his head angled down and beneath the blusher, you could see that a genuine blush had given colour to his skin.

Lee was the first one to speak "Well, Tenten, you look beautiful. I have never seen you in a dress before."

"Thanks, Lee. What do you think, Sasuke?"

Sasuke looked away as if not bothered "You'll pass. Nobody will give you a second look, well, not the suspicious kind anyway. And, Hyuuga?"

"What?"

Sasuke smirked "Tenten was right. You make a brilliant girl."

Neji glared and his hand instinctively moved to his side, reaching for a kunai knife, before a look of honest confusion crossed his face as his hand only met silk fabric. Before Sasuke could make another mocking remark, Lee interrupted to ask "Neji, what is the plan to catch the criminal?"

Neji was grateful for the distraction and began his pre-mission briefing.

"Our mission is to capture, preferably alive, the leader of a rebel movement against the Feudal Lord of Fire Country, named Gakuto Sugaru. He is almost never alone, but the Geisha house has been identified as a place he regularly frequents. His guard is far more likely to be down here and the bodyguards in his service aren't going to be concentrating on looking after their employer. He pays well enough to have his own private set of rooms, with girls constantly going in and out. Tenten, you're going to be distracting the bodyguards, simply because they're likely to get physical quicker, and we can't afford for me to be discovered as a boy."

Tenten nodded, looking a little uncomfortable, so Neji quickly added, "I know you have to act like you're willing, but if they try to go too far, you scream and Lee or Sasuke will get you out of the situation. If that happens, we might have to abort, depending how much it is witnessed."

Lee and Sasuke nodded, serious now that the mission was about to start. Neji continued, "If it is not witnessed, make sure no-one finds the bodies and get out of there. I want all three of you ready to receive our target, when I join you later with Gakuto."

All three of them nodded and Neji finished by saying "Lee, Uchiha, you're back-up. I want you in the grounds of the house, in a vantage point that means you will be able to see most of what goes on. Lee, you're with Tenten, Uchiha, with me. Your job is to monitor all outside factors and inform us if something comes up that might endanger the mission. If, for some reason, we get split up, meet up outside the town, twenty miles due north into the forest."

Everyone looked back with determination and Neji was slightly reassured. Maybe it would be worth this ridiculous dress-up if they could nail this guy first time.

"This mission is classed as rank A. While Gakuto himself is not overly dangerous, the threat he poses to the Fire Country is considerable. Is everyone ready?" asked Neji.

Sasuke checked his weapons pouch and Lee stretched a few times before they both nodded and all four of them left the rooms to begin the mission. Neji and Tenten walked arm-in-arm, looking exactly two best friends out shopping, while Lee and Sasuke lagged several paces behind, both clearly Konoha ninja on a mission.

Taking a deliberately meandering route through the crowds, Neji and Tentenwalked confidently into the Geisha house and pretended that they knew exactly what they were doing, copying the other girls and flirting with the men already there.

They'd only been there five minutes when their target walked in, flanked by five bodyguards.

Gakuto Sugaru was a short, balding man of about forty-five, dressed in a suit with an awful leer on his face. The bodyguards were the typical muscle-bound gorillas that would be no match even for a genin, and Neji and Tenten were a jonin and a chuunin respectively.

Gakuto headed straight for his set of rooms, with the prettier girls following him and Neji quickly followed. He was stopped briefly by one of the bodyguards, looking him up and down in a way that made Neji feel disgusting, but Tenten promptly distracted them and Neji slipped into the rooms.

Gakuto was in the middle of the room, already with a giggling girl on his lap as the rest of them began to get refreshments ready. Neji began to help and mentally began to prepare himself for a long time. They had managed to get this far, now Neji just had to think of a way to get Gakuto without any witnesses.

Sasuke watched as Neji and Tenten casually entered the Geisha house. He and Lee gave them five minutes, just in case they came straight out, and then ducked into an alleyway beside the large building.

Both of them scaled the walls and carefully looked around, before creeping through the beautiful gardens, peering in through all the windows to find their teammates. Sasuke soon spotted Neji in the room with their target, so he waved Lee on to find Tenten.

After a few minutes, he got a signal from Lee, indicating that he had found Tenten and she was fine. They then settled in to wait. Sasuke was quite happy just sitting there watching Neji, though he did have to remind himself a couple of times that he was supposed to be checking on his surroundings.

Sasuke watched as Neji smiled and flirted, swinging his long hair over his shoulder and throwing heated glances as he helped make tea and sweetmeats. Despite the girl on Gakuto's lap, Gakuto was watching Neji, lust in his eyes as Neji's slim figure walked back and forth.

Sasuke had to hold back a possessive growl as Gakuto reached out to touch Neji, his rough hand stroking down the young man's exposed back, grinning as he did so. Sasuke knew he had no right to get possessive over Neji, the longhaired jonin didn't belong to him, but even so, jealousy stirred in the pit of his stomach.

Suddenly, Neji looked up and their eyes locked, pale with dark. Neji's pale eyes widened slightly and Sasuke broke eye contact swiftly, half-scared despite himself, wondering what Neji might have seen in his dark eyes. Those eyes, even without his bloodline ability activated, saw too much as it was.

Then, Sasuke felt a hand on his shoulder and looked around to see Lee, motioning towards where Tenten was. Sasuke followed, with only a cursory glance back over his shoulder to check on Neji.

Tenten was sitting in a rather provocative position, just a few metres away from the two bodyguards sitting outside the entrance of Gakuto's set of rooms. The other three had disappeared off with other girls, and Sasuke supposed that this was the benefit of the job, and this was what kept them loyal.

Tenten glanced over and caught Lee's gaze. Lee nodded and Tenten switched her focus back onto the bodyguards. Sasuke watched as she bit her lower lip gently, considering her options, before apparently deciding on a plan.

She got up and appeared to start tidying up the room, picking things up and moving cushions and pillows. Sasuke wondered what she was up to before glancing at Lee and seeing that his eyes were almost popping out of his head and a violent pink blush suffused his face.

Sasuke looked back at Tenten and then realised what she was doing. Her activities, while completely innocent, were making her bend over a lot, and considering how short her dress was…

Once she had finished, Tenten flounced over to the bodyguards, a wicked smile on her face as she offered them something to drink. Both of them, still eyeing her short dress, took them without question.

She then casually sat on one of their laps and proceeded to talk to the other.

In a couple of minutes, she had them completely distracted from their job. The one she was sitting on had his hands rather high up on her thighs and Tenten was letting him, but was still flirting with the other one, her hands on his knees to balance herself as she leant forward.

She flicked her loose her hair over her shoulder, using the movement to mask her face as she glanced over to where Sasuke and Lee were waiting, mouthing a simple question 'Are you ready?'

Sasuke nodded and Lee mouthed a response, so Tenten concentrated back on the bodyguards. She stood up and pulled them with her, carefully indicating which room she was heading for so Sasuke and Lee could get there a bit before her.

When she walked in, she pushed one of them down and turned to the other. Before either bodyguard could make a move, Lee had barrelled through the window and flung himself into a roundhouse kick. Sasuke did something much more simple. He threw Tenten a kunai knife and let her deal with the one on the floor.

In less than a minute, both bodyguards were on the floor, both dead, one from a broken neck and the other from a kunai to his heart. Tenten nodded to them both and Sasuke swiftly left, intent on getting back to Neji.

He slipped back into his spot and peered through the window, searching for the jonin's dark head. When he finally did see, it was with some surprise that he noticed the position Neji was in. Gakuto seemed to have got bored of the other girl and now had Neji seated on his lap, both of them watching some other girls dancing.

As if feeling Sasuke's eyes on him, Neji looked up and their gazes met again. This time, Sasuke held his gaze, as he quickly mouthed 'Tenten's all right. Guards are dead. Whenever you're ready.'

Neji nodded, disguising it with a flick of his hair and turned his attention back to the female dancers. Sasuke quickly squashed another flair of jealousy as he was not pathetic enough to be jealous of the dancers Neji watched with such interest.

He'd give so much for Neji to look at him with such attention.