Title: Uh, Ginny?
Author: Me. :]
Beta reader: Her. :]
Rating: Definite M for slash…hahaha!
Pairing: Ginny/Dean and…dare I say it…Harry/Ron
Summary: When Ron gets agitated from watching Ginny and Dean snog in the Three Broomsticks, he decides to get her attention in a very queer sort of way. slash!
Note: Dude, I don't own shit, you should know that. :] I just couldn't resist after seeing Half-Blood Prince. Hermione made me do it! Things may be slightly paraphrased, cause I don't have the DVD with me currently and I found a transcript of the scene and I'm not sure how close it is to the real scene (some parts may have been taken out or changed, or just plain wrong), but enjoy it anyway. :]

The golden trio—or, as others knew them, Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger—entered the Three Broomsticks pub. As they entered, Harry happened to glance over at the bar, seeing their new potions professor, a Horace Slughorn, at the bar. The two others started to move one direction in the pub, but Harry stopped them by saying, "No, over here."

The two were frozen for a second before moving in the direction Harry pointed out. They had started to sit at a perfectly clean table, one that anyone would have chosen upon entering, but Harry had other plans. He had them go to a table completely covered in another customer's filth. However, this way Harry would be in direct view of Slughorn.

Hermione and Ron exchange a glance before seating themselves. They weren't sure why Harry would choose this table. Ron started to sit, blocking Harry's view, but he quickly said, "No, no. Sit next to me."

He stopped. He and Hermione shared another glance. "Oh…kay…" he said before sitting next to Harry. As Ron seated himself, a busboy came to clean up the table, completely blocking Harry's view of Slughorn. He craned his neck to see around him, much to Hermione and Ron's (though mainly Ron's) confusion. "What'll we have?" the boy asked, not even bothering to think this behavior was abnormal for Harry.

"Three butterbeers," Hermione said, ordering for them. "Splash of ginger in mine please."

The boy whistled, nodded, and left to get their butterbeers. Harry continued to eye Slughorn, but then his eye caught Draco Malfoy entering, looking nervously around, and exiting. However, before he left, he met Harry's eye and sneered.

"Ah, bloody hell…" Ron said, bringing Harry slamming back to reality.

He turned to meet Ron's gaze to see Ron's little sister Ginny on a date with Dean Thomas. They were holding hands and talking in the corner, although about what was beyond the three. Their faces were only lit by a glittering candle. The rest of the corner was dark.

"Oh, honestly, Ronald, they're just holding hands…" Hermione said, but when she looked over again, the two were snogging. "…And snogging," she added.

"I'd like to leave," Ron said, turning back to the two of them, and Harry, for one, had to agree with him. He was insanely jealous of Dean.

"Leave? You can't be serious," Hermione said sharply.

"That happens to be my sister!" Ron said as Harry started undressing Ginny with his eyes.

"So? What if she looked over here and saw you snogging me? Would you expect her to get up and leave?"

Ron blinked, utterly speechless. Suddenly he had an idea to get Ginny to stop snogging Dean…but he wasn't sure if he could do it.

"No…I wouldn't," he said, smirking on the inside but being poker face outside. "But I would expect her to leave," he couldn't speak properly because of the evil grin forming on his face, and Harry's, too, "if it were, maybe…me and Harry?"

"You and Harry?!" Hermione spat. "But…but…but…!" She was flabbergasted. "That's disgusting!"

"Is it?" Ron asked, knowing he had Harry in on his scheme. "But Dumbledore's doing it, and he's one of the greatest wizards of all time, you know…"

"Just because Dumbledore's doing it…DUMBLEDORE'S DOING WHAT!?"

Harry couldn't help but smile. Yes, their tricky little plan was working… He turned to Ron and raised his eyebrows at him. Quite suddenly Harry and Ron were snogging.

"That's disgusting!" Hermione snapped, gagging. "God, do you have to do that in public?!"

Dean pulled away from Ginny and turned and looked at her brother, his mouth falling open. "Uh, Ginny?"

Ginny turned and she, too, was taken aback.

"God, Ronald!" Hermione snapped. "Oh, God, keep that in your own mouth!" Soon people were turning to stare at them, including Slughorn. He noticed Harry, smiled, and started to stand, but realized what he was doing, so his eyes went wide, he turned around, and sat down, not believing his own eyes. Hermione turned away as well, not being able to look, but at the same time not able to keep away.

"Ronald!" Ginny said. Ron turned to see Ginny and Dean standing above them.

"Oh, hello, Gin," Ron said. "Wonderful day we're having, isn't it."

"Simply wonderful," Harry agreed.

"Well, yes, I suppose it is," Ginny said, though it wasn't wonderful in the least bit. "But I, uh…I didn't know that you were…uh…gay…"

"Taste the rainbow, bitch!" Harry said, laughing, and Ron apparently thought it was equally funny. Draco Malfoy, standing in the corner, scoffed, and even from the distance, Harry could hear him mumble, "Potter…gay…I knew it…"

Ron stood on the table and so did Harry, screeching about gay pride. Hermione had ran to Draco Malfoy at this point. "I can't believe they're gay and didn't tell me!" she told him.

"I knew it since day one," Malfoy said. He scoffed. "I'm so telling the Prophet about this," he said before exiting.

"Gay boyfriend, gay boyfriend," Harry and Ron screeched, just for laughs. "I don't really care that you are queer! Gay boyfriend, GAY BOYFRIEND! I NEVER FEEL LONELY WHEN YOU ARE HERE! IT'LL BE A GREAT ROMANCE! WE CAN GO SHOPPING AND BUY TIGHT PANTS!" People were snapping pictures, and the two left the pub hopping, skipping, and laughing like lunatics.

"Told you she'd buy it," Ron said once outside. "Was that a great trick or what?"

"Definitely," Harry agreed. "We're still straight though, right?"

"Oh, yeah, definitely."

Inside the pub, Ginny was flabbergasted. "I didn't know that they were…that they…that Ron…that Harry…"

"Taste the rainbow, bitch!" Dean said laughing.

"Dean!" she snapped.

"Well, Gin, it was pretty damn funny," Dean said, laughing until his sides ached.

Ginny groaned and took a spare piece of parchment out of her robes and a quill. Wanting to be a writer someday, she always carried it with her, to jot down plot bunnies when they came to her. She wrote a letter to her mother, telling her the shocking news.

Mum,

I don't know how to tell you this, but…Ron is gay.

Ginny

Molly Weasley was at home, stirring soup using her wand for her husband and three of her six sons when Errol came crashing to the window. She sighed, opened the window, and let the owl in. She took the letter out of his beak. The script was sloppy, rushed, and illegible, but she managed to make out what was scrawled across the parchment.

Mum,

I don' t know how to tell you this, but…Ron is gay.

Molly fainted.

i had to do it! the magical cookies of wonderland wouldn't let me not do it! ;] i made up the part about ginny's author dream, it just made the whole having parchment thing work better. please review the lulz!