I have issues with what I'm seeing, not going to lie.

It's... incredibly awkward.

Well, it's awkward for me. There are three people in the room and the other two seem pretty fine with this.

Of course, he's half-naked and she's in his arms making protests that would be far more convincing if she wasn't giggling at his flirting.

Really, why am I even here?

The man on the couch on the far side of the crown prince's reception room is the owner, Ian Vasilios. That is, Ian is the crown prince of the empire. A few heartbeats away from potentially ruling us all.

He's handsome I suppose. Thick dark hair with a thick lock falling over his brow. Broad shoulders that would fill the white and black uniform tunic rather nicely if he was wearing it. Golden eyes that might be eccentric to my eyes but in this world aren't all that uncommon. (Actually, if I checked one of the mirrors, my own eyes are a similar shade.)

He's also my fiancee. Which, given that a handsome prince is what every maiden should want ought to mean lucky me, right?

Aha.

Ahahahaha.

Ian, you see, is one of the male leads in a book titled 'The Man I Love'. Destined to fall hopelessly in love with the lead lady of the book.

But I, alas, am not her.

Yuri is blonde and blue-eyed. A sweet girl with such prodigious magical talent that despite her common birth she was adopted by a baron.

I, on the other hand...

Well, the heroine must have a villain to overcome must she not? And the book assuredly has one: Melissa Podebrat, a woman hated by all the male leads for various reasons. An overly privileged woman who lacks any significant magic or skills of any kind as such. Her sole role to be a barrier to others' happiness.

And I am now standing in her shoes.

Oh lucky me.

Melissa might have liked the idea of being princess and having Ian to herself, but the engagement had been since childhood and with access to her memories and a scant bit of perspective, I could confidently state that he was a lech who had shown Melissa only a shallow pretence of affection at formal events when he absolutely had to. Otherwise he was constantly in trouble and for the last few years, since he was old enough, he'd been cutting quite a swathe through the young ladies of court.

Like this, basically.

Yuri, apparently, could redeem him. The power of true love.

I hope something does or the empire is in deep trouble once he's on the throne.

"Miss, are you teasing me?" he laughed from across the drawing room.

The girl pressed against his chest, but not hard enough to actually separate them. "Oh I don't know... Ian, you beast..."

He plastered the back of her hand with kisses. "If it's in front of you, miss, no man can resist and has no choice but to become a beast."

All this has happened before, all this will happen again.

Look, I have no real issue with him screwing around as long as the women are willing. Melissa was a lonely spoiled girl and the few moments Ian smiled her were as close as the poor little rich girl got to actual affection (her screwed up family is a whole other rant) but my expectations of an arranged marriage are a bit lower.

But the only reason I'm even here is because he expressly invited me.

Yeah. And it's not as if he couldn't have done this with Melissa, at least before I wound up inside of her head. The little twit would probably have been delighted.

But no, when he invites her over like this it's the same every time. She spent hours dressing up, came over and wound up finding him with another woman. And this happens over and over again. I think anyone with half a brain knows that this does not bode well for the two of them ever having a half-way decent marriage.

"Oh my, Ian," the current girl asks, looking at me over his shoulder. He's got her dress down around her waist and I'm almost morbidly curious how far they would go if I let them.

I mean, the real Melissa wouldn't have let this go on.

No, she'd have waded in and 'protected' her man. Hair-pulling, clawing, screaming... a cat fight until the guards hauled her off and sent her home.

And what would Prince Ian Vasilios do while this was going on?

Stand up, get his clothes back on and then studiously look away. As if it had nothing to do with him.

Prick.

Where was I? "Oh my, Ian. Who is that girl?" she asks him "...Is it your maid?"

Well, I assume that Ian didn't pick her for her brains. Being fair, she might be a perfectly sweet girl under normal circumstances, but a maid? Excuse me, miss, I am wearing a nicer dress than you are than you were before the lothario of the kingdom peeled it off you - with rather tasteful jewels in my hair, around my neck, off my ears...

Maids are not going to be wearing this get-up, is where I am going.

Ian doesn't even look back at where I am, standing with my back to the door. "Don't worry about her," he tells the woman in his arms. "Instead, let's take this off first..."

There's not a lot for them to remove.

You know, if he'd shown me any of that attention I might - might - have given him a second chance. It would have been extremely generous of me to do that, but I did have some thoughts of pretending to be the Melissa that everyone was used to. And being queen is a sweet deal. I could just ignore his affairs and live a life of luxury.

But now that I think about it, no.

No, I'm not touching him.

If he's like this when I'm here, god alone knows what he does other nights. What might he have caught!? He could have any number of diseases.

I resolved in that moment of clarity that there was no chance he was getting anywhere near my skirts. There are some diseases that cause brains to rot, and his inability to maintain even a thin facade of civility with the daughter of a rich and powerful duke he was supposed to marry one day suggested Ian's brain was very very rotten.

Well, that clarifies my goals nicely.

Before doing anything else, I reached back and quietly turned the handle of the door behind me. I'm sure the royal guards wouldn't leave their posts but letting them hear the entire conversation and not merely the usual narrative might be amusing. And then I laughed, letting a little of my annoyance out.

Both the others looked at me in expectation as I stalked forwards, and then, rather than assaulting them, I sat down casually on the couch facing the one they'd been making out on. "I'd say that was a very stupid thing to say, but it was actually very scripted, wasn't it?" I wasn't sure about that, but it seemed reasonable.

I suddenly had Ian's attention, for the first time in my understanding of Melissa's memories. I think it surprised him as much as it did me. "Have you... perhaps finally gone crazy?"

I tsked mildly. "I do feel a little bad for the other women you've done this with, Ian, but only a little because they must have known what they were letting themselves in for. Still, it was foolish of me to blame them when the common element was you." I doubt my smile was a happy one. No, it felt cruel and predatory. The smile of a villainess. "Would you enjoy it if I treated you the way that I treated them? Pulled you by your hair, threw you to the floor, tried to beat your brains out with an ash tray?"

His highness seemed quite discomforted by the suggestion. So did the doxy, who was red-faced as she looked at me. Good.

"I know how bad your personality is," Ian said at last. "But I wouldn't have thought you would say such cruel words in front of me?"

"I'm at a loss for why you think I wouldn't. Are you really so stupid that you thought I approved of you seducing other women? Is your mind so small that you couldn't remember my reactions the first time you invited to the palace and you behaved like a lecherous dog?"

Ian shook, physically, at those words. His hands clenched, though they remained down at his sides. His face quivered, cheeks red and tears formed at the corners of his eyes. The outwardly dashing gentleman was gone and replaced by a pouting little boy, snivelling about being yelled at.

Frankly, it was not something I had expected.

Then again, when had he ever faced punishment for his activities? Perhaps this was a first for him? I realised that Melissa's memories contained nothing of him ever facing parental discipline. Not that she would have known since other than formal occasions and these recent invitations, the crown prince had avoided her whenever he could.

I don't recall him every acting like this in the book.

Then again, that was written to portray him as a desirable romantic target. I don't think any woman reading about this sort of childishness would be pleased.

Unless they had some sort of fetish, ugh!

He had retreated to the other couch, taking his companion on his lap. It might have looked like a romantic scene but it seemed to me that he was using her as a shield against me.

"You've made it perfectly plain that you hold me in contempt, your highness." My smile bared my teeth as I stood again, dusting off the skirts of my dress. "And I do not care to be treated in this fashion, so speak to your father about breaking off the engagement and I shall do the same."

"B-break off?" the dunce asked, sounding quite shocked.

"Indeed. Do enjoy being eligible again, your highness." I turned my back on him and went to the door.

"...can't," he said in a low voice as I took hold of the door handle. Then he leapt to his feet, throwing the girl in his embrace to the floor. "You can't!"

The girl gave a pained cry and stared at him in shock.

I quite deliberately opened the door. Whatever happened next, I wanted witnesses. "Given your behaviour, is this not what you wanted?"

"Melissa, what's up with you all of a sudden?" he asked appealingly.

I gave him a quizzical look from the doorway. "I simply do not wish to marry you, your highness. Why would I?"

He shook his head from side to side, still red-faced, not meeting my eyes. "S-so, my point is...! I don't want to break up!"

"Then you probably shouldn't have treated me like utter crap." I turned my back and saw the two guards were staring at me in astonishment. Oh, that was rather unladylike of me.

Eh, whatever. I turned and walked down the corridor away from the reception room.

"B-but...!" Ian ran to the doorway and shouted after me. "Weren't you the one who harassed me first?"

I didn't stop walking, although given the damned wide skirts of this fashion I wasn't exactly walking quickly. "How so, your highness?"

"You kept clinging on to me excessively! You kept bothering me about the smallest things and came over uninvited several times! I-It was hard for me too, you know?"

I gave the nearest guard a quizzical look. He looked deeply embarrassed at being witness to this. Good.

"If you find my trying to build a positive relationship so unpleasant -" Getting down the stairs at the end of the hall might be a small challenge in these heels. I'd had to be careful coming up them earlier, I really wasn't used to shoes like this. "- why do you now claim you want to keep the engagement?"

His already flushed face grew redder. "But you love me!" he protested rather than answering the question.

"Not any more." I reached the top of the stairs and reached out for the rail.

Ian ran down the corridor after me, still bare chested, offering a frantic laugh. "You're just lying because you're mad..."

"No." I took my first cautious step down the stairs. "Love takes effort, your highness. And after so long of it being returned only with spite, I am no longer inclined to spend any effort on you.

"Th-there's no way..."

I paused, took another step. As much as I want to just go down a few steps at a time, if I tried then I suspect I'd end up head-first on the marble floor at the bottom. Pause, another step. "It is over, your highness. I can't make you go to your father, but I assure you, there is no way I will ever marry you."

"W-we can't!" he shouted. Any eyes in the grand entrance hall that weren't already aimed at us turned in our direction. This was the palace's main entrance, and it was fairly busy. "We can't cancel our engagement!"

"You just stripped a young lady half-naked and threw her to the floor," I reminded him in a flat, carrying voice. "You disgust me."

Ian reached out to grab my arm and I dodged him, wobbling, barely keeping one hand on the rai to steady myself.

"Get your hands off me!" I shouted, horrified and enraged. It was still a long way to the ground. "How dare you!"

Guards from both above and below converged on us. Two caught hold of me, which was part relief and part further provocation, for they were not gentle.

"Making a scene again, Lady Podebrat?" one declared in a sneering tone.

"I am endeavouring to leave the palace on one piece," I shot back. "Just get me to my carriage and keep this idiot from accosting me further!"

Being frogmarched down the stairs was less embarrassing than the guards around Ian reassuring him that he was safe now and that his fiancee was being taken away. As if he was the injured party. It was tempting to correct them, but it would doubtless be seen as mad raving.

A/N: This is a start at a self-insertion into the manhwa Beware of the Villainess, a story that follows the Otome villainess isekai tropes, but unlike Hamefura, in this case the protagonist finds that all the capture targets are quite horrid. The trouble is, I'm not sure I can do a better job of handling them than the canonical Melissa did, which is pretty funny once she starts getting to grips with them.