I'm not so happy about how this one turned out, actually. But I won't be all pessimistic about it.

Andy: Well that's a surprise.

Oh, hush, you. D:

Yeah. So this was originally going to be Sasuke in a tree to escape- ok I might actually do that in another fic. So I won't spoil.

YESSSS. Another two-in-one-day thing! I'm so proud!

SO ON TO THE ONE-SHOT! Enjoy!

Escaping Fangirls

Why?

I think I've asked myself this nearly every day, but once again…

Why, oh, why?

I have no idea how it happens. One second I'm walking down the street looking for a good place to get something to eat, and the next thing I know I'm running away from a pack of wild fangirls.

How on Earth do they find me so quickly? If I didn't hate them so much, I'd have to give them some serious skill points for being able to track me down so precisely.

I swear I must be on MapQuest or something, it's like they type in my name, and it gives them directions on where I am!

Or maybe they all have trained hound dog noses. I wouldn't put it past them to go to my house, sniff my socks, and hunt me down by scent.

Either way, they're not getting praise from me. No way.

Just because I'm graced with remarkably good looks- doesn't mean I shouldn't be able to go outside without a horde of girls chasing after me.

I didn't ask for this! Really!

This is the reason I went gay for Naruto. You would, too, if you had to deal with all these girls every day.

I mean, it has nothing to do with his striking blue eyes, his perfectly tanned exterior, his well-toned chest, his adorable whiskers, that dazzling smile, that beautiful blonde hair, his lovable ignorance, or his cute humor! I swear! It's a shallow relationship caused by my hatred of fangirls.

…I swear.

Anyway, back to the crazy, drooling-at-the-mouth girls that are unrelentingly running after me.

Where do they get there stamina? Good lord! Are they all on the freaking track team, or are they just running on hormones?

I didn't know hormones could be converted into energy…

Shit. Shit. Shit. What idiot would run in front of a stampeding group of-

….

"Naruto, you fucking imbecile!"

Of course I would have to save him.

Stupid damsel-in-distress.

Though he is the cutest one I've ever seen…

No, wait! Don't get distracted, Sasuke! Think angry!

"If I have a grass stain on these new jeans I'll strangle you."

Yeah. Good job, Sasuke. Show him who's boss.

"Dude, watch where you're going! You nearly killed me from that tackle!"

….

"Idiot! I saved your sorry ass! You could have gotten trampled!"

"Well they're your fangirls!"

The nerve of him! He has improved his glare though, but mine is still much better. His shivering proves it.

"Scared?"

"Angry, actually. I mean, can't you control those things? It's disgusting how they're all drooling over you!"

I watched as Naruto glared at the group behind us in disgust.

Wait, what?

He was glaring at them?

Well, besides the fact that they just nearly killed him and me, what possible reason could make him glare at them?

Unless…

I smirked. I mean, I couldn't help it.

The dolt might actually like me!

He did say it was disgusting that they were drooling over me! That has to mean something, right?

Don't answer that.

Wait, I could test if he likes me…

Hm, considering he was already my first kiss, it wouldn't hurt to kiss him again.

Plus, that would get rid of the fangirls!

Two birds with one stone!

Oh, Sasuke, You are a genius.

Though, I can't stop my heart from racing.

He won't notice as long as you keep smirking.

"Sasuke… why are you looking at me like that?"

Jackpot! He just backed into a telephone pole! Oh, Naruto. And I always thought you'd be the seme.

Play it cool, Sasuke. That's right, hands on either side of his head.

His squirming is strangely arousing…

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

I can't believe he initiated the kiss.

Yes! He so likes me!

I bet he can feel me smirking, but again, I can't help it.

Damn he's a good kisser.

Where did he learn to do that with his tongue?

Well, whatever. It feels nice. I'm not going to complain.

Wow. I never thought people would be so angry at two boys kissing. But it just goes to show how ugly jealousy can be.

I'm pretty sure they're gone, but there's no way I'm going to stop kissing him.

Wait? What did I just hear?

Oh, there it is again!

Are people whispering?

Girls?

A lot of them, by the sound of it.

Well, I need air anyway. It won't hurt to look.

…….

"Oh no, don't stop!"

That came from the girl with red hair and a camera.

"Uh, what are you people doing?"

What? It was a pretty clear-cut question.

I mean seriously. What girl likes watching two guys make out?

"Filming, of course! Proof of NaruSasu! Oh this is so exciting!"

That came from a squealing brunette in pigtails.

Wait.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait.

NaruSasu? Proof? Filming?

Oh God… Don't tell me… Oh lord…

I must have looked ten shades paler… If that's possible for me.

Well, it doesn't look like I'm going to get to french Naruto in public.

What a wonderful night!

I never knew how much comfier a bed can be when you're snuggling with a cute blonde.

Well, I certainly found out last night.

Time to take my beautiful little blonde bimbo to a breakfast out! Our first date, this is going in the record books.

Why?

Why am I still asking myself this?

I thought I had gotten rid of this daily menace.

Apparently, getting trailed by fangirls is never-ending. No matter what your sexuality is.

But I at least thought these fangirls would respect our privacy.

I sighed audibly, and gave the tanned hand in mine a slight squeeze, and got one in return.

At least running with a partner is a lot more fun. Especially if that partner is gorgeous.

I'm never telling him that, though. He's only allowed to compliment me.

Besides, he should already know he's beautiful.

Way off-topic.

…Ahem. Anyway…

I guess getting chased by fangirls will always be a part of my life. Whether I'm with Naruto or without him.

I know how to get rid of my new fangirls- but there's no way I'm giving up my tanned buffoon.

So, do you know? I'm almost certain the brainless blonde next to me doesn't.

Do you know how to get rid of these darn yaoi fangirls?

Oh, Sasuke. Too bad for you, we will always be here!

I've told my friends this and I will tell you. I'm absolutely terrible at a boy's point of view. Considering I am a girl.

And I'm even worse at Sasuke's point of view. It probably shows. I really do apologize for any OOCness I may have portrayed.

This was written in about... thirty minutes? And it is 4 in the morning. So don't hate me if this is bad. Please?

Andy: They already hate you.

Emma: NO THEY DON'T.

Andy: I told you that you were going to get an ego. D:

I don't have an ego. D: I swear it's because of all the good reviews. THEY ARE MAKING ME SO HAPPY.

Thanks for reading anyway!

Have a nice day! :3