As Hatake Kakashi and Umino Iruka dragged the very full and semi-conscious Uzumaki Naruto along the moist dirt road of Konoha, the Chuunin wondered if there was a functioning, unspoken pact of silence between him and the Jounin. A little earlier all three of them had sat down to dinner at the behest of Naruto who had so unwittingly arranged for the occasion. In those days it wasn't strange to see variously ranked shin-obi eating together on a social call, but since this was a special case, none could have vouched for the entire oddity involved therein.

To say the least, the meeting had been as awkward as one would expect. Naruto had literally done all the talking which for the most part included exaggerated complaints about Kakashi's alleged dedication to fascism and passion for hard labor. And just when both teachers thought he was done fuming over his 'horrid' experience for the day, he'd lunge back for more. This had caused Iruka to frown time and again over his soup bowl and each time it seemed he was about to confront the Jounin on the matter, he would smile faintly and go back to his meal. Having run its course, the dinner ended at nearly ten in the evening, by which time Naruto had already started yawning and in a few minutes slumping to his side, a total doze case. Kakashi and Iruka wordlessly shoveled him off the ground, each on either arm of the child, and opted to bring him home this way.

"I suppose this wasn't part of your plan." When Kakashi spoke, the neighborhood seemed to have already followed Naruto's suit. Only the street lights were on, and the silence was characterized by such nocturnal attributes. "I daresay we have a conniving little runt here."

"I made him promise to tell me all about his first-day-of-training experience. For some reason it had to coincide with your treat." Iruka replied and realized simultaneously that this was going to be a rather rocky road for a conversation. Alongside this, Naruto's far from docile body was slowing down their progress.

They let a period of silence pass. Iruka could feel the temperature dropping with rapid ease. He adjusted his position, trying and finally managing to pull the sleeves of his shirt so that they rolled down closer to his wrists. He did the same for Naruto's benefit as he balanced the boy in one arm. Next to them, Kakashi shrugged a little. Perhaps the Jounin viewed this as a pathetic indulgence, perhaps not. Whatever it was, Iruka took note of him with instinct, rather than sight; anyway the moonlight was too pale to make anything out in detail.

"You dote on him too much. He whines at the slightest trial. And he's an awful spoil case." Kakashi said after a while.

"Thanks. Any more compliments you want to add?" Iruka rejoined.

"Oh, and he's got a developing attitude toward Uchiha Sasuke. Any idea where it could have originated?"

"Plenty."

"Seems to me it's your classroom."

"Great. So now I'm an awful teacher." Iruka said. "Anyway, if you're planning to act like a jerk all throughout this conversation I might as well take Naruto on my own."

"On the contrary, I find this timing convenient. Since we don't have a clue what each other thinks with regard to how these students should be handled, maybe we can chip in some of our thoughts and piece them together."

Iruka caught himself trapped and began hesitating. Once again he had felt the sharp stab of recollection in his chest. If Kakashi meant to maintain this behavior, it was only a sour drop in the sea of unspoken and bitter feud between them. It had remained suspended for far too long now not to have been concluded or expressed at any point in time. In the long term, both ninja would only stand for several accusations before defending themselves in any manner they found available. And Iruka, who knew he had to stop before he got too carried away, understood that the children's welfare was their top priority.

"And just now I thought I gave you a rather negative impression. And what about the files I relinquished to your care a few days ago? Surely, they're supposed to give you something?" he said and he raised his eyebrows as though Kakashi was deliberately causing him delay. Then again, that was about all he could do when annoyance was about to take the better of him.

"I'm open to alternative opinions. As for the files, I find few, if none at all, that are of any value."

"If your message is to illustrate my incapacity you have outdone yourself, Kakashi."

"I meant that the files might have been useful to you, in your context, where everyone doesn't have to be in real action. But not quite for me; I should've thought about it before." Kakashi mumbled in a lowered tone. He had slightly shifted his position to better accommodate Naruto's weight, frowning perhaps at the thought of the triviality of an added presence. Nonetheless, it was good that he was asleep and wouldn't have to hear the sequence of harsh words he and Iruka were now trading between themselves.

"Yes, well, I get what you mean. Basically it's just that the difference between what you're doing and what you think is the tedium of what I do inside the classroom is comparable to a before-and-after advertisement. No worries, I'll let you take over soon as I have my resignation papers signed. And while you're at it, please make sure that they risk their lives in their daily training routine." Iruka had wanted to add 'asshole' but thought better of it some time between tightening his clasp on Naruto and balling his free fist.

As if on cue, the breeze had picked up its tempo as it started fanning against the space. It blew in such a way that it seemed to produce music. And long before that Iruka and Kakashi's words had crossed the formal limits of their professional relationship as colleagues--like a music of discord. Even in the partial darkness, through Kakashi's pretentious mask, Iruka saw the Jounin's brows furrow and fold the little flesh between them whereby he absentmindedly began scratching the other side of his arm. Iruka remembered that Kakashi used to do this when he was a little stumped up for what to say.

"Alright now, Iruka. I didn't endorse this so we could criticize each other."

"Funny I had the feeling you did. And here I am riding it." Iruka sneered, sarcasm in full throttle.

"I believe what I said in the beginning is that it's in the students' best interest to have us deliberate their needs."

"If you say so." Iruka answered but didn't trouble himself with appearing convinced. "So, I assume Naruto here is the problem child?"

"His attention span is deplorable. Care to tune me up on that one?"

"I can't believe someone like you would be bothered to this extent. But at any rate, there are those kids you have to have patience to be around with, and Naruto is one of those. Kurenai-san's Kiba doesn't fall short of it as well, and so do Asuma-san's Chouji and Shikamaru. When it comes down to it, Naruto more than anyone needs all the attention and care he can get. He's an orphan and you know how orphans are…"

Iruka's words faltered. He had touched on the common ground and somehow the bleak prospect of further steering this conversation toward where it should be proved too much. Twelve years ago, it was his and Kakashi's loneliness that pulled them together, the same loneliness, as it happened, that was now poisoning the snoozing child between them. His eyes never leaving Naruto's face for a second, Iruka felt more reminded than ever. Quickly but painstakingly, he wrenched himself away from these thoughts.

"Naruto is a wide-open book with an awful lot of surprises. Sometimes you know him through and through; most times you don't. He has a very good heart there somewhere, Kakashi." Iruka proceeded. "He just hides it whenever Uchiha Sasuke is around," he then chuckled.

Kakashi, too, laughed as if it sufficed. Up ahead, Naruto's quarters grew bigger in their sight.

"This is where he lives? Alone?" Kakashi asked Iruka in mild surprise.

Iruka nodded, a qualified affirmative. "You'll get what I mean better once you get to know him. This is only part of his being different."

They walked toward the building, docking the boy on the small porch where they paused for a little while. Iruka yanked the door open and inside, they were greeted by a clutter which even the darkness couldn't conceal. Gently and with caution, they laid Naruto on single mattress that had obviously seen better days.

"You must have worn him out." Iruka said once they were outside.

"I didn't say my training was going to be a walk in the park." Kakashi said and turned his attention to his surrounding. "It's gotten really late. Come on, I'll walk you home."

Iruka opened his mouth in protest but Kakashi, for all intents and purposes, had now swung to the direction where Iruka's apartment led to. They walked but retained a considerable distance between them. Upon reaching the third corner they spotted a lit unit, the only one in the neighborhood that hinted of still being alive. They stopped in front of it.

"I'll be right here. Thanks, Kakashi."

"Don't mention it."

"Goodnight, then."

"Goodnight, Iruka."

Before Kakashi could turn around, a young woman appeared from behind the door. While not altogether striking, she was pretty and had a good figure. She smiled when she saw Iruka and glanced at Kakashi as if trying to remember if she'd met him before. Opposite her, Kakashi's calm expression was replaced with a mildly questioning stare.

"Mizumi, this is one of my co-teachers. Hatake Kakashi." Iruka said.

The woman stepped forward and extended a hand to Kakashi. "Takago Mizumi. I'm Iruka's fiancée. It's nice to meet you." her voice was sweet but there was something in it that Kakashi didn't find warm. At least, not as warm as Iruka found it for sure. He took the hand, tried to smile back casually in order to look more normal but the closer the woman got, the tenser he felt inside.

"Would you like to come inside for a cup of tea?" she offered.

"I'll have to decline, but thanks anyway." Kakashi muttered. He didn't say anything more to Iruka then but he didn't need to either.

Kakashi heard the door shut behind him. He stayed for a short time under the light that was coming from the apartment's window, his only refuge from the darkness, and he bathe in it with a renewed feeling of solitude. Beyond the walls that separated him from the couple, he could catch snatches of the tender and loving words passing from one lips to another, Iruka's and Mizumi's. For all Kakashi knew, those lips were now grinding on one another. To be in love and committed, he wondered if that's all it takes to run away from and never be found by a lonely past. That remained to be seen. As for Iruka and the circumstances under which the Chuunin now lived, Kakashi could only imagine.

He slowly spun his way toward the next street, choosing to tread on grounds where there was a high concentration of moonlight. He gazed at the stars with focus as though afraid they would vanish so quickly. In real life, lights flicker and die when they glow too much.

"I don't love him." Kakashi whispered in the dark. "Not anymore."

So what if Iruka was going to get married? He was going to be married and that's all that was going to be to that. Married. To another person. A person Kakashi had never before seen. And she was empty. She had no thoughts or memories of Iruka like the ones Kakashi had. At this point, the memories in Kakashi's head were unremitting, and the spaces he used to count on for quietude were filled. What was it that he felt when he heard the word 'fiancée'? What did he see? What did he see? Once upon a happier time (and what a short time that was!), he and Iruka dreamt of the stars, and the sun, and fields of gold that lasted through eternity. Forever. Does forever end when someone gets married? Can't you dream of forever when all the time you have is here and now? They played, they laughed, they ran and got lost and found each other within the limits of time. Time slipped through their hands, and found tomorrow theirs again. No matter where Iruka ran, whether it was away from or toward Kakashi, it was all the same; he found him. Love was their only compass. Did she have her own compass? Could she find Iruka after he ran and laughed and hid and masked himself in the shadows the same way Kakashi found him back then? Could she?

Kakashi felt tired. Thinking had done him. Thinking of these memories only brought him closer to the breaking point.

"I don't love him. I probably never did." he repeated to himself, willing himself to believe it.

But does not believing something stop it from being real?