i suppose it's not much, but it feels like a million words after a lifetime of not updating.
i've missed this.

thanks for sticking with me in the meantime.
i've read every review and pm and urge to update. they make me smile.

disclaimer: i do not own gg

The knock on the door was so soft, she wondered if he'd heard it. Just as she was about to knock again, he opened the door. His navy blue Yale sweats hung low on his waist, a white T-shirt pulled lazily over his chest. Hair ruffled, dark-blue circles under his eyes.

"Hey", he said softly, and gestured for her to come in. She'd almost wanted him to look mad or yell at her for taking off in the middle of the night. At least then she wouldn't have to feel so guilty looking at the tired, worn-down man that stood before her.

"Hey", she smiled ruefully in return and held up a greasy bag of donuts. "I brought breakfast."

Logan nodded, "I've got coffee."

"Good." And she followed him into the kitchen. "I went to see Mitchum," she said, but he just nodded slowly and started on her coffee. She took a seat at the breakfast bar and proceeded to watch him. She'd watched him many times before in Londen.

Coffee, waffles, lemon chicken and rice...Sitting here should've felt natural, but here, in New York, she felt awkward and out of place. Rory had never allowed herself to think about what "the morning after" would feel like, but she certainly had never imagined it to play out like this.

Logan continued steaming the milk, and Rory watched patiently as he poured a shot of espresso in the cup of milk foam and stirred in 2 sugars. She gratefully took the cup, but didn't drink.

"So, I went to see Mitchum," she said again and he let out a deep sigh. "Finn told me."

She'd kind of expected Finn to divulge, so she smiled and kind of shrugged, like she couldn't help but see Mitchum. Like it wasn't her fault.

"Why Rory?" Logan asked. "What happened last night?" It was clear that he was genuinely confused and wanted to know. Everything seemed so perfect (too perfect?) as he slipped under the covers next to her just a few hours ago.

She took a generous sip of her coffee, allowing her enough time to think about her answer. "I'm sorry, Logan, I just… we went on a date, even though it wasn't a date. And you made me coffee. Really good coffee…" she took another sip, "…and then you kissed me. Just like that, like, you were always supposed to kiss me." She wiped away the little bit of milk foam that clung to her lip before he could.

"You kissed back." His tone was even, but she detected a little bit of panic and a little bit of blame. "I would've stopped…if you were uncomfortable."

"I know," she said quickly, putting her eyes on him, letting him know that she didn't regret the kiss or anything. "I didn't want you to stop," she said and felt a little heat rise in her cheeks. "I just…I didn't expect it. And then I fell asleep. In your bed."

He was oblivious to the weight that statement carried. "I didn't want to wake you up."

And the tenderness in his comment silenced her. He didn't want to wake her up. And suddenly she thought about beautiful, sweet, I-wear-my-heart-on-my-sleeve Aubrey. If Aubrey was brave enough to be completely, I'm-freaked-out-by-how-much-I-like-you, honest with Finn, a guy whom she'd barely known 10 days, she sure as hell could (should) be honest with Logan.

"I woke up in the middle of the night and I didn't realize where I was. I thought you were a random guy."

"A random guy?" Logan's eyebrows shot up in a surprise.

"Don't be mad," Rory sighed, but couldn't look at him, didn't want to see how much her comment hurt him. "You aren't some random guy to me, Logan. You are The Guy. And I'd treated you like I would've treated a random guy, while you aren't. I just wanted things to be different, because you deserve different – something better. And I thought I was better."

She didn't see him move around the breakfast bar, moving closer to her. "And as I was lying there, I thought, "maybe I'm not better" and then I thought about Mitchum and Emily and what they'd say, if they found out. Especially Mitchum. I'd figured he'd be mad. Not at me, because he thinks I'm broken, but he'd be mad at you… and…"

"You're not broken," Logan cut through her ramble. She was breathing heavily now, on the verge of tears, and hadn't noticed that his hands were now covering hers. "You're not broken, Rory," he said again, "and I don't care if Mitchum is mad."

Her eyes found their way back to him and he was looking at her in that way again. It was that look that cut straight through her soul, the one that made her knees go weak, the one that made a film of sweat cover her manicured hands, the one that made her heart thump, thump, thump in her throat, and the one that made it feel like 1 million butterflies lived in her stomach. It was a look she hadn't seen this intense since the promise of Nice hung in the air. It was the look that had started this all.

"You should've woken me up, Ace," he said softly, "I want you to wake me up for things like this." With last night and Rory's ramble, everything came to a head and it felt like this was a now-or-never moment for him. He brushed a soft kiss on her lips and she couldn't help but smile into his kiss. "I like that," he said and she giggled a little. "We've been through a lot, huh? We've both been stupid, played games."

She nodded, "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too," he sighed deeply, "but I'm done playing, Ace. I wanted things to be different for us, too. A real date, just the two of us, and not with Finn and Aubrey. You know, lights in the tress, a movie star kiss. Take things slow, go dancing, kiss your hand…."

"You dance?"

He ignored her quip, shaking his head slowly, "But last night happened and it was great."

She nodded in agreement.

"I need you to know," he said, "that you are not broken. Whatever happened with the Greek guy and the other guys and when you were 16, it doesn't matter. I went out, I partied, I know."

"But…"

"Rory, it doesn't matter. You know how I know? I know that I'm not a random guy to you, because you aren't a random girl to me."

Their eyes locked, her perched on a barstool looking up at him, his fingers interlaced with hers.

"I love you, Logan," she said, the words bubbling up before she had a chance to think about it. Her confession took them both by surprise. She was sure her cheeks were bright pink and she felt queasy. But she wasn't apologizing, she wasn't taking it back. She was being bold, channeling Aubrey, wearing her heart on her sleeve.

"I love you," she said again, as if she was realizing it for the first time, as if that made all of the puzzle pieces in this game click together, "that's why I went to see Mitchum."

He caressed her cheek, before cupping her chin gently and leaning down and kissing her. Long, deep, appreciatively. A special kind of kiss, one reserved especially for a special kind of girl.

"I love you, Ace," he whispered as he pulled away. He looked away almost shyly after saying it, before laughing. "I've never said that to a girl before. Ever." She smiled back, running a hand through his ruffled hair. Regaining he composure, he laughed again, "Of course, no girl I've been with has ever gone to see Mitchum before…"

"Oh well," Rory shrugged playfully, "that explains it then."

"So, what ol' Mitch have to say?"

"Not much, actually," Rory paused, "he invited us to a barbecue."

"A barbecue? Why?"

"Because he's freaking Mitchum."

"What he do?"

Rory saw the fire in Logan's eyes, and wondered if she should really elaborate on her revealing conversation. In the big picture, it didn't really matter, did it? She and Logan were together now. She toyed with the idea for a second, before shaking her head.

"I understand better why you hate Mitchum," she said. "He orchestrated the whole thing, Logan."

"What do you mean?"

"I went to see him, right? Expecting him to be all angry and confused and I don't know, against the whole thing. I wanted him to get mad at me, not you. I didn't want to jeopardize anything you had going at HPG, I know the deal was 10 weeks in New York and then freedom."

"Yeah…" Logan sighed heavily. Now, he wasn't quite sure if he would go back to London. It depended on her, she'd have to be factored in.

"So, I told him that we went on a date."

"And?"

"And?" Rory exclaimed, getting worked up recounting this morning's conversation, "he chuckled, all smug-like, like he knew all along and that he was happy about it. Mitchum just stood there and told me that, basically, you were the love of my life and that you'd never felt like this about a girl before…"

Logan's lips tugged into a small smile, "True." And Rory blushed, self-consciously tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"The Rules were a test for you, Logan!", she yelled, scooting off her barstool. "That you adhered to them was confirmation enough for Mitchum, he says I changed you. Said Grandpa knew that you and I were destined and that it was better than any business deal. And that he's looking to get into the music industry now. That you've shown you deserve it."

She looked at him hard, waiting for him to join in her anger. Instead, he reached out for her, stopped her pacing, and enveloped her in a strong hug.

"Call Mitchum," Logan said, "Tell him we'll be there at 4:30 for a little barbecue. Tell him to invite Emily, too, and your parents."

She pulled away, a confused look on her face. "What?"

Why wasn't he mad? Why wasn't he stomping and pacing and shouting expletives? How could he be so calm after being a pawn in Mitchum's game?

"Ace," Logan sighed, "It's Mitchum, it's what he does best. Telling me, telling us, could've saved a lot of heartache…"

"That's what I said!"

"…but it doesn't matter. We made it. Mitchum makes you fight, he'd never just give me anything, not something important anyway."

"So you'll stay with HPG? You'll take him up on his offer?"

Logan shot her a wicked smile. "I didn't say that. I'll be released from my contract in 10 weeks. Legally I'll be free as a bird."

"But…"

"But," he sighed heavily, "Mitchum doesn't give up without a fight."

"So?" Rory's eyes went wide, not being able to follow Logan's train of thought. "Why are we going to the barbecue?"

"Mitchum is still my Dad," Logan smiled, "I'd like him to meet my first real girlfriend. Plus, he might as well invite the whole family over – Emily, your parents – we can get the whole awkward, we're-a-couple-now thing out of the way."

Rory shot him a megawatt smile.

"What?" he laughed, brushing her cheek softly, trying to bite back his own smile. "We're a couple now," she repeated slowly, savoring each word as she said it, before standing on her tippy toes and kissing him.

They stayed like that for a little while, caught up in their own little world. Far away from London, from Nice, from what should have been or could have been. They were just focused on now. Standing in his kitchen – her coffee had gone cold long ago, the donuts still greasy in the bag, forgotten on the counter – kissing like they could just stay there forever.

After a while, pulled away and smirked. "That we are, my dear Ace, that we are."

So, considering my track record with updating...I'm thinking that the barbecue will be the final chapter. Perhaps an epilogue. Thoughts?