Alright, this is my first attempt at an M-rated story. Let me warn you---there will be swearing, and there will be lemons. If you currently read my story, To Avenge, beware before diving into this one, lovely friends! Although 'Avenge' gets a little hot, this'll be more explicit. This Edward is even more full of angst than my "To Avenge" Edward. I don't want to sullen your perception of me or Edward, so consider yourself forewarned!!!

This is similar to Avenge only in the sense that Edward has hunted humans before. I will (of course) continue Avenge, because it is my epic ExB story (lol)!

My plot line is typical for this one, but I have a few fun ideas/directions that may make it worthwhile. I would appreciate your feedback. If you're intrigued and think I should continue, then I will. If I don't get feedback, I'll probably scrap it and leave my fantasies in my head for the time being. Sigh.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight; the beautiful and talented S Meyer gets that honor.

Okay, no more A/N and onto the story!

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EPOV

"Fuck," I muttered to myself. I'd slammed the door of my Volvo too hard, leaving a dent. The dent didn't bother me; it was my edginess that was pissing me off. I needed to relax.

Rosalie shot me a murderous stare from the other side of the car and spoke to me in her mind. Get it together, Edward. We're staying, and you promised Carlisle. I ignored her as usual.

It was the first day of school at Forks High. I took an unnecessary breath and surveyed my surroundings. People were milling around everywhere, buzzing with energy. I swallowed back my venom as an onslaught of human scent wrecked into me. The blood was frenzied due to everyone's excitement, and my stomach muscles tightened in anticipation.

Trying to suppress my thirst, I focused on the thoughts of those around me. People were worrying about their outfits, their classes, the opposite sex…it was incessant and predictable. I felt like I was watching a bad sitcom over and over again. I stifled a sigh and slung my backpack over my shoulder.

I'd only been back with my family for a few months, just long enough for my eye color to turn back to its standby golden hue. The golden color was an indication of our vegetarianism, a color that I wore much less faithfully than the rest of my family. Every decade or so, the monotony of being frozen at seventeen got to me, and I would need a change. Throughout my hundred years in this existence, I'd occasionally gone out on my own to hunt humans instead of animals. I had just returned from such a trip, and I was still restless.

I swallowed back more venom and felt it burn down my parched throat. Whenever I returned to my family, it was inevitably harder to resist human blood. It didn't matter that I was well fed. Thankfully, I was practiced from years of self restraint. Carlisle and Esme had stopped worrying about me transitioning back into 'vegetarianism' years ago. I had proven that I could control myself, and I knew I would become desensitized over time.

It didn't help that I could hear others' minds. It was exhausting, and I blamed it for my lapses in control. I justified my hunting by the fact that I killed only the vilest of humans; their vileness was verified through my extra hearing. I'd tried to convince Carlisle that killing evil was my form of community service, but he'd never found my argument very persuasive.

My family didn't agree with my hunting escapades, and they had grown less and less tolerant as I'd gotten older. This last trip had been the hardest on them, and I knew it would have to be my last. Carlisle, my father, welcomed me back, but our relationship was undoubtedly strained. He made it clear that I wouldn't be welcomed back if I chose to leave again. It hurt my mother, Esme, too much when I left, and my whole family worried about me to no end. I'd promised Carlisle and Esme to stay permanently this time. I couldn't risk losing the only family that I knew and loved.

"Let's go get out schedules," Rosalie said rudely, breaking me out of my reverie. She gave me another warning look. I was sick of her condescending attitude, so I discreetly gave her my middle finger while pretending to scratch my chin. She stormed off and called me an immature prick in her thoughts. It was completely juvenile of me to flip her off, but I couldn't resist. Besides, I was in high school. I was supposed to be immature, right? I sulked behind her as we began our walk to the office.

I tried to remind myself that I wanted to enroll in high school with Rosalie, and that I needed to be thankful for this opportunity. I was too stressed to sit at home or work at the hospital with Carlisle. It may be my ninth time in high school, but I didn't care. I wanted the mindless busy work, and high school required the least amount of effort.

People stared at us in awe and tripped over their thoughts. Rose and I were playing the role of brother and sister, transferring in for our junior year. I tried not to grimace when some of the students wondered if we were a couple. I would rather die all over again than be Rosalie's mate.

We had three other 'siblings,' but none of them would be joining our high school charade this year. The five of us weren't as much siblings as we were a forged family of misfit vampires, with Carlisle and Esme leading the helm. All of my siblings were paired off with each other and helplessly in love. Currently, two of them were off traveling in Europe together, and our remaining sibling, Emmett, had decided to go to college and have his own place. Emmett and Rosalie were together, and they'd wanted to live out a little fantasy of theirs. Rose wanted to have a college boyfriend while in high school. He was going by the name of Emmett Hale, and Rosalie took Cullen, like me. I thought they were being childish, but I kept my thoughts to myself.

I was the odd one out, the only member of my family without a mate. I couldn't find a woman that interested me, so I had stopped trying long ago.

I walked to the front office with Rosalie, trying to keep a pained look off of my face. Rosalie smiled demurely at people staring at her, completely in heaven. She loved high school for the adoration she received. Unlike Rose, I kept my head down and didn't want the attention. I tried to focus on looking nonchalant.

"Good job, Edward," Rose thought sarcastically. "You look completely miserable. It's impressive."

"It is high school," I mumbled. "I think that's allowed. Teen angst and all of that."

As we walked, the thoughts of many curious students flooded into me. I listened to distract myself. They had been waiting for the arrival of Dr. Cullen and his mystery children, and we didn't disappoint. I almost flinched at the jealousy that swirled around us. Rosalie had insisted that we dress in designer labels, as if we needed to look any more alluring or intimidating to the students that should be our prey. Rosalie was breathtaking to them in her tight Chanel blouse, True Religion jeans and Manolo heels, and everyone either averted their eyes or stared at her.

"Rose," I said casually. "So much for being discrete this year, huh?" She looked smug and shot me a knowing smile. I hadn't meant it as a compliment. She was so infuriating sometimes.

The thoughts about me were similarly flattering. In fact, I could already hear the fantasies formulating. A blond-haired girl leaning against a locker was imagining me walking over to her seductively. As I listened to her fantasy, I tried not to laugh…

"Excuse me, but I'm new," I would say to her. "I was hoping that you'd show me around."

"Of, course!," she would exclaim, wrapping her arm around mine.

After a few minutes of conversation, I would tell her that she was irresistible. I would lean down to give her a slow kiss in front of the whole school.

She thought about how everyone would be so jealous, and how she would have the most gorgeous boyfriend to ever come to the Olympic Peninsula…

I couldn't hold in my laughter any longer, and Rosalie gave me a questioning look. "What?," she thought. I shook my head, telling her that it wasn't important.

There were less innocent fantasies, too. A girl with blue eyes was shuffling around in her bag and trying to look discreet as she stared at me. In her thoughts, I was roughly taking off her shirt and pushing her up against a bathroom stall. I was beginning to lick and bite down her stomach hungrily, inching closer to the waist of her low rise jeans with my wet mouth… I cringed and tried to block it out as I walked farther down the hall. In reality, I would likely crawl back up to her neck and break through her flesh, sucking greedily from her hot artery. Her vivid imagery didn't help my errant thoughts. This was going to be a long year if I didn't keep myself sufficiently distracted.

Rosalie noticed my grimace and assumed it was sex. "Hear anything interesting?"

"The usual."

She smirked. I wouldn't be honest with her, and she knew it.

My siblings had a theory that I was sexually deprived, and that I just needed to get laid and loosen up. According to them, if I got laid, I would stop leaving for my escapades and acting like such an agitated know-it-all. I thought they were crude. I was technically the oldest vampire next to my father, and I hadn't been raised in my former life to sleep around. I wanted to love the person beforehand. Throughout the years, I'd always dismissed their teasing without a second thought.

Over these past few months, however, I had been reconsidering their theory. I couldn't deny that I was frustrated lately in ways that I didn't understand. I needed to handle the voices in my head and grow up. I knew my options; I had to find another way to be at ease or else forsake my family forever. Currently, my escapades were the only thing that gave me any release for my pent-up frustration.

Every other vampire I knew had physical relationships, except for me. Maybe it would help to find some companionship. At this point, I'd try anything just to feel content.

I'd decided this past week to give it a try. The first part of my plan was to finally go on a date with Tanya. My siblings were thrilled. Tanya was a vampire in Denali who had been after me for years. She was beautiful, of course, but not at all my type. Hell, I didn't even know what my type was, but she definitely wasn't it.

If I hadn't found my type in 100 years, I wasn't going to find it now. Love was out of the equation. I was sick of waiting, and I was going to do what Tanya had been fantasizing about doing ever since we'd met. I was going to fuck her and see if it helped. God, I hoped it would.

We got our schedules and, to our happiness, only had one class together: PE. We saw each other enough at home and wanted to avoid one another at school as much as possible. Starting tomorrow, we would even drive separately. Rosalie would find some popular clique to worship her, and I would focus on my studies and keep to myself. It was our routine.

"So, are you going to suffer in silence again this year, Edward? You know, you don't have to be such a hermit. It may do you some good to get some social interaction," she said suggestively.

I was about to say something sarcastic, but I realized that Rosalie may have a point for once in her annoying existence. Maybe, part of turning over a new leaf meant that I should be more outgoing. I would try to make some friends, maybe play a sport or something. It would give me something to do, a way to discipline myself, and it would keep my mind of off other distractions. What did I have to lose? I had more self control than Rosalie. I wouldn't kill anybody.

"I think you're right, Rose," I said thoughtfully. "I should…get more involved this year. Make some friends. Why not?" I smiled at her shocked expression.

"Well, good luck," she stuttered. "I'll be surprised if you can get anyone to like you."

I thought back to the girls who had been fantasizing about me, as well as the other complimentary thoughts that had been thrown my way this morning. "Hmm, I don't think I'll have any trouble making friends." I could be charming if I wanted to be.

"Well, whatever. I'll see you after school. Don't be late, Mr. Popularity," she said sarcastically, "I'm meeting Emmett."

"Don't drown in lip gloss, Rosie." She hated being called that by anyone but Emmett. I chuckled at her angry expression and walked to my first class.

I had Advanced Biology first hour, and it was conveniently located at the other end of the school. I took my time walking there and gave everyone pleasant grins. Most everyone stared, but a few collected their thoughts and smiled back.

I walked into the classroom just as the bell rang. I scanned the room for an empty seat. Everybody stopped talking and gawked at me, astonishment registering in their thoughts.

This has to be Edward Cullen…

Lauren said he was hot, but oh my God.

Please sit by me…

I shouldn't stare, but look at his body…

I spotted an empty seat in the back and decided to take it. I kept smiling and tried not to look at anybody in particular. Although it would feel unnatural for me, it might be nice having friends. The scent of blood was already getting more manageable. I'd just have to hunt more often than usual. I would also have to be careful not to answer people's thoughts all of the time. I had learned how to control that pretty well, but I'd also been a hermit for most of my decades and could slip up.

I ran a hand through my hair and readjusted my backpack on my shoulder. I was halfway down the aisle, feeling encouraged by my little pep talk and wondering what clubs I should join.

Suddenly, I staggered back, disoriented. A tidal wave of delicious scent bowled me over. It took all of my strength not to fall to my knees.

I searched frantically for the cause of the fragrance, still paralyzed by the sheer force of it. My eyes settled upon a vision, and I gasped. A small, dark-eyed girl stared back at me. She'd been leaning over a desk, talking to someone about a paper, but now she was watching me warily. The mouthwatering scent was radiating off of her translucent skin. She had rosy cheeks and mysterious, brown eyes. Long tresses of brunette hair cascaded down her back and framed her heart-shaped face. A deep blue dress hugged her subtle curves, and she bit her lower lip seductively as I continued to stare. She was the most beautiful creature I'd ever seen, and I was rendered speechless.

My whole body quaked with fire. Even still, I wanted to envelop myself in her scent as much as I wanted to drink it. This was a different kind of thirst, one that was completely foreign to me.

She flushed a deep crimson color under my unfaltering gaze. I was clearly embarrassing her, as well as myself, but I couldn't avert my eyes. Say something, Edward. Damnit, say something! I tried to hear the angel's thoughts, to see what she thought of me, but she was silent. I tried harder to hear her, memorizing her features and listening for a voice. Still nothing. By now, the whole class was staring at me like the freak that I was, and the teacher was getting impatient to start class. He wanted me to take my seat.

His voice boomed out from the front of the room. "Edward Cullen?" The teacher had heard some of the students in the first row say my name.

"Yes?" I choked out. It sounded more like a whisper. With all of my strength, I turned my head away from the girl to look at him. My body yelled in resistance. I wanted, no needed, to look at her again.

The teacher was confused and exasperated. "Do you need help finding a seat, young man? Or perhaps you need a formal welcome to Advanced Biology? Are you in the right class?" Good looking kid, but I bet he's slow. This is the last thing I need this semester. Another retarded jock trying to skate through my advanced class.

"Yes, sir. I'm in the right place. Sorry." The class snickered, and I felt mortified for the first time in my life. My behavior over the last few minutes had been the shining definition of awkward, and Edward Cullen was never awkward. Maybe Rosalie was right. Maybe I would have a harder time making friends than I thought, especially now that I'd seen her.

I collapsed into the nearest empty seat and put down my bag, staring once again at the beautiful creature who sat just a few rows in front of me. Her head was propped up on her hand, and it looked like her luscious hair was blocking her face from the teacher's view; I couldn't tell for sure. I did have a view of her back, though, which was breathtaking.

"Hey," a voice whispered from next to me. "I'm Ben. I take it you're Edward?"

I tilted my head towards him. "Yes. Nice to meet you," I said hazily.

"We're gonna be lab partners this semester. Welcome to Forks. Are you, um, okay? Do you know Bella or something?"

Her name was Bella. "The girl in the blue dress?" I tried to feign innocence. "She looked familiar for a second. Who is she?" I wanted to know everything and curiosity burned in my voice.

"She's a junior. She's really nice, originally from Phoenix but transferred here at the end of last semester. Maybe you know her from Arizona? Have you ever been to Phoenix?" There was genuine concern and curiosity in his voice, which was refreshing. Most young males were jealous and rude. I liked Ben and decided that he would be my first friend at Forks.

"No, that can't be it." I shook my head and smiled a sheepish grin. "I don't know what got into me." That much was true.

"Huh, weird."

The teacher went over the class syllabus, and I pretended to listen. I couldn't stop thinking about Bella and my overpowering attraction to her. I tried not to be too obvious, but I stared at her longingly, wishing I could see her eyes again. Why couldn't I hear her? Was I losing my abilities? Everyone else was still crystal clear, so I didn't think that was it. Besides, I didn't think I could lose my hearing, but there was always a first time for everything. No matter how hard I focused, she remained an enigma.

Minutes passed, and the boring lecture trudged along. Bella would move in her chair or flip her hair occasionally, and I would get a wonderful whiff of her scent. Although her blood was sweeter than any I'd ever smelled, I didn't find it agonizingly hard to resist. She smelled like a sweet bouquet of flowers mixed with the finest food. I was equally drawn to her skin, and hair, and hips, and legs, and…

Before I could stop myself, I was envisioning Bella's beautiful curves moving underneath her dress. I thought about how she would move uninhibited by clothing. A creature like her would look splendid naked. The teacher droned on, and I started picturing Bella stripping off her dress, looking like an ivory vixen, beckoning to me. As she slowly revealed her body, I yearned to caress it and revel in my prize…

As I thought about Bella stripping, my yearning spread to my lower stomach and dropped into my groin. I almost moaned aloud, and then panicked when I realized what was happening. I could feel my full arousal straining against my pants. Oh shit! For the first time ever, I had an erection in public. This was fucking unreal. I didn't know what to do.

I listened to Ben's thoughts, feeling paranoid that he would notice. Thankfully, he didn't seem to be paying any attention to me and was instead thinking about a girl named Angela. I needed to get my 'problem' to go away, so I crossed my legs and squeezed my thighs together. That seemed to provoke it, so I uncrossed my legs and clenched the sides of the table instead. I tried to think of something that repulsed me. Tanya's annoying voice popped into my mind. Ugh, the idea of her talking started to calm me down instantly. Think of Tanya, think of Tanya.

The irony of my situation wasn't lost on me. I was planning on having sex with Tanya, and yet she was the antithesis of sexuality for me. Instead, I was getting aroused for a human girl I'd never even met. Fantastic.

The teacher finished his discussion and wanted us to use the last five minutes of class to mingle. More panic coursed through me, because I realized how badly I wanted to talk to Bella. Would she talk to me? What would I say? "Hi, Bella. Can I see you naked? I'm a horny vampire hot for your blood and body. Thanks."

"Ben," I whispered, "will you introduce me to Bella?" I was such a masochist.

"Sure," he said, caught off guard. He didn't understand why I didn't do it myself. The truth was, I thought it better to stay seated for my first encounter with the siren. Also, it wasn't polite to approach a woman like Bella without being introduced first. I was already being thoroughly inappropriate with my thoughts about her.

A few people started talking to me while I waited for Ben to bring over Bella, their thoughts full of lust. The last thing I needed was more fuel for my own fantasies, so I tried in vain to block them out while simultaneously engaging them in polite conversation. All I really listened to was Bella, though...

She was talking to a kid named Mike Newton, laughing at some lame joke about sports. Did she like him? To my irritation, Mike was also picturing Bella naked. He reached out and stroked her arm, enjoying the feel of her skin. She seemed to recoil a little and absentmindedly tapped her pencil against the desk. How dare he touch her! I hated him and wanted to rip his hand off of her.

I continued to watch Bella from the corner of my eye as a flustered Ben tapped her shoulder, gesturing towards me. Bella looked shocked when she realized that Ben meant to introduce us. I had probably insulted or scared her. Damn it, I wished in vain to hear her thoughts and know how badly I'd screwed things up with her.

She excused herself from Mike and started walking over to me with Ben at her side. I could no longer focus on the students talking to me. Bella was threatening my arousal once again as she took cautious steps in my direction. Her legs were sinfully bare in the dress, and they were begging for me to run my hands over them. She fidgeted and tucked her hair behind her ear. How was she so adorable and sexy all at once? I would definitely fantasize about this later, but I needed to compose myself now.

As she approached, her scent ripped down my throat, and I gripped the table for support. I closed my eyes, preparing to make an ass out of myself in front of the sexiest woman alive.

"Edward, this is Bella. Bella, this is Edward Cullen. He just moved to Forks." Ben had gone a little red in the face and felt awkward. I would thank him later for doing this.

I changed my mind about staying seated, so I stood up but kept the table between us. It would be discourteous of me to stay seated. She stared at me guardedly.

"Bella, it's so nice to meet you. I apologize for…earlier. That was rude. You looked familiar for a moment." I thought I sounded convincing. For good measure, I offered her a rueful smile.

She held her breath and stared into my eyes. A warm heat spread to the apples of her cheeks, lightly staining them, before she spoke. "Um, it's fine. It's nice to meet you, too."

Her voice was music, smooth but slightly throaty… from what? Nerves? There was no way that she could be as nervous as I was.

"What's your next class?," she asked. She glanced at the schedule lying on the table in front of me.

I handed it to her while I spoke. "Humanities, and then I have PE right before lunch."

She frowned. After looking it over, she spoke from underneath her eyelashes, not quite meeting my gaze. "We have two more classes together and the same lunch hour. We have PE and History." She looked somewhat upset as she handed my schedule back. I wondered why. Did she not want to have classes with me?

The bell rang, but I continued to stare at her. It was practically my new hobby. Ben shifted his weight awkwardly.

"Guys, I'm gonna get going. Edward, I'll see you at lunch, er, if you want," he added quickly. He thought I would already have lunch plans and wouldn't want to sit with him.

"For sure, Ben." I never took my gaze off of Bella. "I guess I'll see you in PE?," I asked her.

Again, a pained expression clouded her eyes. "Yeah, PE. Have a good next class."

She gave me a half smile before leaving. I desperately wanted to follow. Mike was waiting for her by the door, though, and wishing that I would die. Bella wasn't his girlfriend, but he wanted to change that desperately, and he viewed me as competition.

I laughed to myself quietly. I'd give him competition, alright. I had never wanted anything more than Bella in my entire existence. This was going to be an interesting school year after all.

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If you like this and want me to continue, please review! The next chapter will be written from Bella's perspective, unless you object. Xoxo.