Ahem, I wrote this about after Chapter 46 came out, so yeah. Spoilers. And I took some things and... took liberties. xcuse deviations from the original, yeah?
Disclaimer: Do not own, enough said.
Polydipsia
(n.) Excessive or abnormal thirst.
Kiryuu Zero had come from a family of vampire hunters, had grown up knowing of a vampire's disgusting, insatiable thirst for blood.
He thought it disgusting, pitiful, and parasitic, knew that taking blood was the appalling fate a vampire had, and in order to obtain it, they charmed, looking impossibly beautiful that their victims suspect none of what would befall them. It was an ingenious sort of adaptation, one that would stun humans with their attractiveness. A perfect predator.
The charm of a vampire was that he was distant, apparently far out of the human's league. Therefore, the human is flattered by the lavish attention, and being a simple, romantic human, the victim is unwittingly drawn straight into a predator's clutches.
It was despicable.
It was funny how he was able to be the opposite when he became the monster he abhorred.
While the Night Class students were distant, only seen when the Day and Night Classes would switch over, he was right there among the Day Class, annoyed with their squealing and shrieking and general fangirling. He was one of the prefects keeping the order and hiding the truth from the unsuspecting humans.
He could never have been one of them, he knew. If he had never been bitten, then he would still be a hunter. Then he would likely never have met Yuuki, never got to know her.
Never got to love her.
As it was, he was the anomaly, being a vampire that hated his own kind, hated his being a monster. He was the anomaly by being a vampire who hunted his own kind with an anti-vampire gun, a fallen hunter.
And he was the anomaly for rejecting the blood tablets, his very body rejecting his needs as a monster.
Even though he was a vampire amongst the humans, they hadn't necessarily had to fear for their lives - Zero had his thirst for blood on an extremely tight leash, so long as he had all his wits with him. If he could, he would have chosen to be the first vampire to starve himself to death. If, if only he hadn't met Yuuki. If only he'd died all those years ago.
Were he in his right mind, he would have killed himself before taking unwilling blood, and he definitely wasn't going to disgrace himself by attempting to charm a victim.
He was present among humans... far from distance the vampires generally were. He made no pretenses of being kind... though he was, the fangirls need not know. He was the dampener to any cheerfulness, was extremely bad-tempered, and the only one he got along with, it seemed, was the equally bad-tempered horse he spends so much time with.
He might appear pretty, attractive, to others, but he never emphasized it, looking almost normal, not at all exuding the vampiric aura that allured humans and terrified animals.
Animals -chewed- his hair. No other vampire would ever be regarded as highly.
He knew of a vampire's thirst, how it was insatiable, how the human's life was held at the whim of a generally blood-lusting vampire. It took time to perfect control.
And it was a sin.
It was a sin, to take the blood of a human, and maybe it was there that the practice of exchanging blood amongst vampires sprung forth, though Zero was sure it was merely another one of the atrocities vampires had committed since the beginning of time.
His own body had refused to accept the blood tablets, he was going to degenerate slowly until he became a level E and someone was going to have to kill him. He had hoped it would be Yuuki who would kill him -- maybe he'd kill himself.
Why was it that she was so willing to save him, her face frighteningly solemn and her eyes huge and intent.
Yuuki was one of the few people he considered precious, one of the few he would die to protect, yet she was the one hell-bent on keeping him alive, even agreeing to kill him, believing she'd never have to.
And she gave him her blood, keeping him sane and alive and ready to do anything for her. She probably didn't expect the latter, and he probably would have protected her even before he took her blood.
He didn't know how difficult it would be to control the urge to take evry last drop from her body. Despite all of his knowledge -- he'd grown up learning of vampires, of course.
Yuuki tasted of love and devotion. She loved Kaname, he knew that. He didn't know that her very blood would sing of it. Her blood tasted wonderful, still, and he'd been concentrating so, terribly hard not to kill her. He was unstable while unsated, he knew. Yuuki's blood tasted so much more satisfying than another's would.
He wondered what a lesser vampire would have done with the opportunity. A vampire with less will and contol than he.
He wanted no one's blood but hers. For a vampire, such a specialized and specific taste indicated that she meant much to him. Much more than he was comfortable admitting out loud.
He dealt with this odd, insatiable thirst that only sheer will kept at bay.
That was why, when he last took Yuuki's blood, he kissed her. So that he would know what it was like to taste something he could probably never have. So that he would know what it was like without the odd still-craving bloodlust feeling he had whenever he took her blood.
He kissed her for a long time, but he still had the odd still-craving feeling, but it wasn't so much heightened by the bloodlust, and he was finally aware that this truly might mean 'goodbye'.
This Yuuki was different, though both of her loved Kaname, he liked the Yuuki he knew far better.
Now, he had to deal with this excessive, abnormal thirst that would probably never be satisfied.