Title: Setting the Facts Straight

Author: chocolatemooses

Summary: Elle gets territorial. Sylar gets his feelings hurt. And somebody's getting laid. Total crack.

Ratings/Warnings: You know what, this is rated R, because Gabriel has a dirty mouth…

Author's Note: Wow, there is so much that needs to be said before this is read. First off this is crack, complete and total crack that comes from a conversation I had with my friend who thought ZQ was gay (she saw So NoTorious). We were watching Heroes and she said something about it being a shame that ZQ was gay because he was so hot. I was going to correct but a strange moment of fangirl jealously overtook me and I just let her think that, so she wouldn't crowd up my fangirliness (is that a word?) for ZQ. Later I was toying with the idea of jealous Elle and this popped out. Please read and comment!

Author's Note Redux: This takes place after 3.09, where Sylar and Elle are partners and work together for Arthur/Pinehearst doing Arthur's evil bidding.

Author's Note Redux's Redux: So sorry this took so long to get out. I actually don't really like this chapter, it is hard to write Gabriel. So yeah, please comment. The next chapter is much better trust me, there is smut! So on to the fic!

Okay, so if he was honest with himself, totally and completely honest, he had been called worse. He'd been called a murderer, a psycopath, a monster, blah blah blah. Yet, he felt as if he would rather be cursed out by every person he had ever killed than hear her say that again.

Gabriel shook his head, replaying the last few minutes in his mind. He had come to Elle's room, hoping to catch her and invite her to lunch with him. They had been doing stuff like that for almost a month now, since they had made their tentative truce when he helped her with her overloading power. At least once a day, every day, he would come and visit her, assignment or no assignment. He didn't really know what he was trying to accomplish with Elle, an occurrence that, just a few months ago, would have drove him out of his mind, literally.

For some reason he wasn't bothered by the confusion that surrounded his feelings for Elle. He knew he liked being with her, liked talking to her, listening to her, watching her. Okay, so maybe he liked watching her a lot…a whole lot. He spent half of his time with her trying to catch sidelong and secret glances at her, every time feeling more and more like the socially inept watchmaker he used to be. But, apparently he had done a better job at keeping his lechery to himself than he had thought.

A terrifying thought struck Gabriel at that moment. "Am I her gay best friend?"

Girls had those, right? He went over the past few months, trying to remember if they had done anything that had been particularly gay. He did once tell her he liked the color blue on her. Did that count as fashion advice?

He was torn. On one hand he really just wanted to run away and pretend that this didn't happen and never, ever ever think of this again. On the other hand he really wanted to march in there and show Elle just how heterosexual he was.

He settled for the happy medium of standing outside her door, mouth agape, like some sort of (NOT gay) loser. He stayed like this until he was broken from his shocked and nearly catatonic state by Elle's little friend practically bowling him over as she left the room

"Oh,Gabriel!"

Her mouth was rounded in the perfect shape of a surprised O and she looked like she was about to swallow her own tongue. All in all, her facial expression was rather comedic and Gabriel would have laughed, except for the fact that Elle-the beautiful and crazy girl he (loved?) liked-just called him gay…with Mohinder of all people! Jeez! You go on one completely innocent and heterosexual roadtrip/killing spree with a guy and suddenly you're gay. It's not like there was a constant air of sexual repression in everything we did together. It's not like we spoke in whispers to each other and got unnecessarily close ALL the time.

Just the mere remembrance of her words brought all of his humiliation rushing back to him. He mumbled something to the still stunned girl and ran away as fast as he could in the opposite direction.

He could rationalize it easily. She was having some "girl talk" and was just making conversation. She had no reason to not think he was gay, when she knew him as Gabriel he had been a complete gentleman and hadn't even remotely hinted to having any sexual attraction to her (even though he really really did). She was just going off the few clues he had given her, it didn't really mean anything.

And yet.

He couldn't get rid of the gnawing, nagging, sensation that had taken rest at the pit of his stomach. Or that voice in the back of his head that screamed at Gabriel for being such a push-over and demanding that he march right back into Elle's room and prove to just how wrong she fucking is. The voice that screamed and ranted in his head, as loud as a thousand sirens. WELL this is a load of crap. You treat her like your equal, respect her, be a complete gentleman…and what happens? She automatically thinks your gay! What does she want you to do? Smack her ass as she walks by in the hallways? Make a pass at her every time she talks to you? Pin her against the stupid cream-colored wall and fuck her?!?

Gabriel quickly tamped down that urge, pushing it aside, locking it away and hoping that it stays there. Praying, that his darker side wouldn't do anything to mess up the fragile bond he had created with Elle. Even if she didn't want a real type of relationship with him, she was still one of the fewfriends and allies he had, even with his newly discovered father. He did not want to risk losing that, especially over something as stupid as water cooler gossip. So he struggled with himself for a moment more before eventually taming the beast within and controlling the darkness once again.

TWO WEEKS LATER…

Count backwards from ten. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6-

Jesus Christ, what the hell does she think she is doing?

Gabriel closed his eyes, calm, try to find inner peace.

I really don't understand how she can even walk in those heels, even without that scrap of cloth she calls a skirt plastered around her ass, it would be difficult.

Deep breathing, it works for anger management, it sure as hell can work for this.

I swear to God, the second we get back to Pinehearst I am going to lock her in her room (preferably with the aid of a normal lock and key but I'm not afraid to use my telekinesis) until she decides that teasing me isn't a good idea.

He closed his eyes and told himself that it was just an assignment. Just like every other-

Gabriel pried his eyes open and was just able to catch Elle brush her hand lazily across the thigh of their assignment. Involuntarily, he felt his hands ball themselves up into fists and his jaw set itself tightly.

Well, fuck it.

Gabriel quickly stood up from his seat at the back of the bar and slid himself out from the booth that he had been occupying alone (well except for the four empty beer bottles that had kept him company). Assignment or not; he wasn't going to sit back and watch his partner get pawed at by some drunk asshole who just happened to have impenetrable skin. Just the guy had his hands all over Elle was enough to cause his blood pressure to rise and visions of violence towards aforementioned pervert to fill his head. Under normal conditions he could have control his baser urge to scalp the older man. No really, he could have. Seriously.

No, the real problem here was Elle. Little electric Elle. Elle, who was practically draping herself across their target, was dressed and acting like she was looking for trouble, whether from the target or himself, Gabriel couldn't be sure.

The rational part of Gabriel knew that Elle needed to butter up the guy before Gabriel approached him with Pinehearst's offer, rationally he knew that. But as he sat in the shadows of the bar, watching Elle flirt and giggle and act like was completely enamored by the man, he couldn't help but feel, once again, like the watchmaker. Sad and alone, in his little corner, a voyeur into a moment in another's life, envying after what another had.

And he just couldn't take it anymore. And he really couldn't be blamed, he's only human.

As he approached, he caught Elle's eye and she gave him a look that clearly said, "Back the fuck off! I can handle this." He ignored her though, he could see, very well, that she had everything handled. That was why he was coming over in the first place. He was half-way across the room when Elle slid out from her bar stool, hand intertwined with their target's. He paused, not sure what Elle was up to, they had decided back at Pineheart that they would stay in the bar. He watched warily as she led the man towards the back door and outside to the back of the grimy bar. He quickly followed, not trusting their assignment and, to a degree, Elle.

Outside, he immediately noticed the form of two people pushed up against a wall. Every one of his senses and emotions went off at once and, with animal-like power and speed, he telekinetically ripped off the larger form and tossed him back against the wall. He turned to see Elle looking pissed off and sparking but otherwise fine. He turned away from her, he would deal with her later. He stared down at the man who was lying in a crumpled heap on the cold ground.

Sylar lifted his hand and telekinetically grabbed him by the throat, the beginnings of a smile causing his lips to quirk upwards. "Robert Keep," he said, his voice low and dangerous. He had almost forgotten how good this felt. The man struggled and strained against his grip but to no avail.

"Wh-what do you want?" His eyes darted down to look at Elle, pleading and questioning.

Sylar so badly wanted to say, your skin. But instead, reached into his pocket and pulled out a business card. He let Robert drop to the ground, the sounds of his coughing immediately filling the lonely lot. "I wanted to offer you a job," he said with a hint of his old humor, light and mocking. Robert grabbed at the card and looked up at Gabriel with questioning eyes.

"What?"

Gabriel smiled. "If you want to come work with a Company that understands then you should come to our offices." He paused and the dark look returned to his eyes. "I would take the job, because as long as my boss wants you then I can't hurt you then I can't kill you, conflicting interests you see. But if you turn us down, well…well then I will have two good reasons to hunt you down and kill you slowly." Throughout, Gabriel's little speech the man had been progressively turning whiter and whiter. When he finished, Robert was so frightened that he could only nod in agreement.

Gabriel gave him a curt nod. "Good. Now, I really don't want to see you again and you really really don't want to see me again. Got it?" Robert whimpered but Gabriel could tell he understood. "Now get out of here." Needing no more encouragement the man gathered himself up quickly and ran away as fast as he could.

Gabriel just stood there, until he could no longer hear the retreating footfalls of his lucky "friend". When he was finally sure he and Elle were completely alone, he spun around on his heels to find himself face to face with a very pissed off Elle.

"I was handling it just fine." She started, her hands still sparking a bit but he was sure this was from anger now and not fear like he had suspected before. "I didn't need your help."

He felt his anger boiling, bubbling up under the surface but he held it in. "Really," he replied lightly, "and you call almost being raped, handling it?" Her mouth set itself into an angry expression and her previously clenched fists loosed to become balls of lightning. He knew he was pushing her too far but he was too pissed off to really care, so he continued. "What did you expect? Leading him out here!" His voice rose and he could feel himself getting angrier. He could also feel himself getting turned on. Mentally he groaned at himself. What the fuck self?! God, I am so messed up. Despite the strange emotions raging within his mind and body, he continued to provoke her further. "God, you dress like that," he made a hand gesture to her skimpy garb, "and come into a place like this. How can you be surprised that some random guy tries to fucking rape you?!"

He pushed her too far, he could see it. He was less than a foot away from her now, unconsciously he had advanced towards her as he ranted and she had backed up until she was once again up against the wall of the bar. However, she didn't looked scared at all. Mad as hell yes, frightened no. For a moment, he wondered why that was. He was a serial killer, a mad man, and most definitely not a good person; she should be scared out of her fucking mind. But instead she was pissed. Strange.

She lifted her face until she was only a few centimeters from his and in a deadly whisper said, "What if I wanted to get fucked? Huh? What if I wanted that guy to fuck me right here against this wall? It's not rape then is it?" She pushed her body a little bit closer to his until their hips brushed together in an agonizingly tantalizing way.

Then something just snapped inside of him. Gabriel couldn't take it anymore and, with a groan of anger, worry, and pleasure dipped his head down and crushed his mouth to hers. His last meaningful thought being, "Fuck it."

She let out a small gasp of surprise but let herself be pushed roughly back against the concrete. She was frozen, every part of her body coiled tightly but Gabriel didn't stop, he wasn't sure he could. He was just about to start freaking out and mentally began to pray that she wouldn't electrocute him anywhere incredibly important (i.e. his groin) when he felt her lips move under his and her arms come around to wrap them around his neck. Her tongue snuck out from her mouth and she deepened the kiss pulling his head down closer to her. She bit at his lower lip playfully and pressed her petite frame against his taller body. He lifted her up off the ground until their lower regions were aligned and touching in a dangerous way.

With a frustrated sigh, he pulled his mouth away from hers and looked down at her flushed face. Both of them were breathing hard and their hearts were beating incredibly fast. He let his hands travel down to her hips and he stared at her with eyes darkened with arousal. He pushed his erection hard up against her groin. "I…AM…NOT…GAY." He punctuated each word by grinding himself into her and causing her to gasp and whimper.

She looked up at him, her chest rising rapidly and her hands fluttering around his neck. For a long moment, neither of them moved, taking in the feel of each other so close. Then a small smile played across her features and a daring look lit up her face. "Prove it."

To Be Continued…