Disclaimer: Pffsh. I wish.

A/N: Author's note is at end because I talk too much.

Warnings: Sexiness. Dirty Edward mind. Gore if you don't like the drinking blood bit.

READ AND ENJOY!

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Forgive

Chapter 5: Awake

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It would be soon.

Edward had prepared for Bella to wake from her burning with care. Emmett had retrieved a dozen or so quarts of blood for her when she awoke and Edward had requested privacy for the two of them. This was their moment. This was their time.

Bella lay on their spacious bed, twisting and crying for Edward, wanting him closer. Edward, however, would keep his distance in the final minutes of her burning, ready for her when she would come to consciousness. He had seen vampires wake before. He did not need to be warned.

Edward watched her body buck and thrash, mentally scolding himself for his desire for her flesh. He couldn't quell the questions that sprang to mind. Would she be ready for him now? Could they finally be together in their lovemaking? Edward winced, remembering how she could never accommodate him or enjoy his flesh within hers, remembering also that he did not enjoy their lovemaking either. He wanted friction when he knew she could not take it. His itch was never meant to be scratched and he stirred at the idea that he could claim her now.

As he always wanted.

His lip quirked up in a coy smile. The threat to Bella had made him wild. Made him possessive and jealous. He touched his lips to feel that he was smirking. The scar shinning on her breast only reiterated what he had already known.

She was his.

Her mind was his.

Her body soon would be.

Edward shook his head. He tried to push the thoughts out of his mind but a particularly dirty one popped into his consciousness before he could suppress it. He clasped a hand over his mouth and whispered the thought into his hand, tasting it on his lips. It had a bitter but altogether irresistible taste. He uncovered his mouth and whispered it again. He had used the word before, but never in such lewd context.

"I want to fuck."

Edward surprised himself and clasped his hand once again over his mouth. Almost giggling wildly when he realized how ridiculous this all was. To remove the thought, Edward raised his hand and hit himself, rather hard, in the temple. Gritting his teeth and opening his eyes to Bella his thoughts were wiped clean when he saw her burning was coming to an end.

Bella had become absolutely still. Her eyes were absolutely blank and her body had the appearance that her blood was drained. It was a more haunting image than a peaceful one. Edward's ears rang from the silence. Reaching beside the chair he sat in, he grabbed a quart sized nalgeen bottle and opened it, preparing for her thirst.

The quiet stillness lasted almost an eternity. Edward could recall the worst of the pain in this moment. It was beyond anything the mind could fathom or the body could endure. It was so incomprehensible that the one burning would be rendered still. Silent.

Dead.

One last heave of Edward's willpower allowed him to last the duration of her finishing. He watched with certain sadness as her body shed its human qualities and gained those of what she now was.

Bella sat up violently in bed.

Vampire.

Bella began hyperventilating immediately. Her eyes lacked any color and her face was scared in pain and defeat. Her body convulsed in dry heaves and she found Edward's face, looking alarmed as her own body rejected her, punishing her. In her new moments of life on the earth in clawing pain she realized what she was.

Her face erupted in sorrow and she began sobbing, her eyes void of any tears that would ever pass her ducts again. Her throat clogged however, her wails far worse than any she emitted while burning.

Edward forced calm and approached Bella with a canteen of blood, extending the contents towards the girl with an appearance of cautious indifference.

"Bella."

Her head snapped towards him and her empty eyes searched him, fear clouding her features as her eyelids fluttered and then focused on the contents in his hand. Bella ran with speed to Edward, touching him quickly across his lips and throat. There was a sense of urgency about her movements.

There was a spilt second of recognition before her body threw another wave of new sensation her way.

Almost as instantaneous as the feeling itself, Bella's hands flew to her throat, clawing at the skin and creating angry marks along her collar. She looked stunned and pained at the same time, her hands not relenting in their attack on her very own throat.

"You're thirsty Bella."

He walked towards her urgently now, unable to take the sight of her harming herself, canteen extended in his hand. Bella retreated in fear and when he had imposed on her to the point where she was in a corner. Her hand flew out and aggressively swatted the canteen away, blood flying out from the open top and coating her arm and the bed in a mess of crimson.

Edward watched in withering control to drink as Bella regarded the length of her arm in wonder. A tentative pink tongue extended past her lips to the thick liquid that was now running down the length of her arm.

A high moan sounded and Bella proceeded to lick the rest of her arm until it was coated only in her clear saliva and venom. She kept licking but when she could find no more of the blood she began biting her arm out of instinct, leaving crescent marks along her forearm and hand.

Edward rushed to her and pulled her arm out of her grasp, picking her up with her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms around his neck. Still in her daze, Bella began biting Edward's neck, causing him to only wince a little as he set her down on the bed where she rolled and began sucking the blood from the sheets.

Edward wasted no time grabbing a bottle and extending his arm in offer to Bella, who took it quickly and drained it of its contents. He continued feeding her, watching as excess blood from the wide rim of the nalgeen bottle drizzled down her lips, neck, collar and between her breasts. His gaze grew heavy as her feeding slowed, her tongue catching the blood on her lips, her eyes not nearly as frantic as it was only moments ago.

Finally, with excess blood to spare in the bottle Bella held, she stopped drinking. Bella sat on the bed with her knees tucked underneath her, her ankles bending out on either side of her hips. Her back was slouched and she held the bottle in both hands, the rim still touching her lips as her eyes looked around curiously. Edward thought with a pang in his heart that her position looked very youthful and innocent.

He shook the thought from his mind.

"Bella?"

Her eyes darted to meet his.

Golden.

Edward wanted to keep Bella ignorant of the pleasures of human blood. It would not be worth feeding on second rate food if she knew that better quality was out there.

"Edward?"

The voice that came from Bella might have reminded Edward of a longing he once had, or an uncertainty. It was pushed so far away from consciousness that he could not.

He walked towards the girl, taking slow conscious steps, feeling as though his feet were trapped in quicksand, releasing reluctantly from the floor's hold with each pull of his heel. Once he was in arm's length of her, Edward knelt down before her. Bella looked at the bottle in her hands, unaware of what to do with it until she reached out her arms, offering the blood to Edward.

Edward regarded the half bottle for a few moments. He looked into her curious eyes and took the offering, finishing off the bottle with leisurely sips, setting it down when he had finished.

"Thank you." He said.

"Sure." Bella didn't know what to say.

Edward couldn't avoid it.

"It is done."

"Yes." Bella whispered.

"How do you feel?"

Bella thought about her words before she spoke. "Not great."

Nodding, Edward replied, "That will last only a little while."

"Are they coming?" Fear laced her voice.

"Soon."

"Do I need to-" she paused, unable to grasp her words, "do anything?"

"Drink whenever you feel you need to. Even the smallest urges. Would you like more?"

Bella shook her head, looking upset.

"No. I think I may vomit if I do."

"It's strange to get used to."

Bella nodded her head, looking down and realizing that blood had run down her nude form, crossing her arms in front of her chest in some modesty.

A small part of Edward's brain screamed in retaliation. He smashed the thought of her flesh, knowing that her emotional capacity was at its limits.

"Bella?"

Without a word, Bella climbed across the bed and into his lap. It startled Edward that her actions were so forward, her legs on either side of his hips and her arms around his neck. It wasn't meant to spark the fire that it did in Edward, it was simply the comfort that she needed. This was beyond anything she could fathom.

"No one will ever hurt you again Bella." Edward whispered into her ear.

Bella would've sobbed if she could.

"He's only a fleeting moment in time love."

He rubbed her back.

"He will pass."

Bella squeezed Edward's shoulders, seeking comfort in his embrace but forgetting her strength. Edward flinched in foreign pain and grabbed her upper arms, pulling her back until she rested in his lap.

"I can't go back can I?"

Pain.

He could hear it.

"No."

There was an ample pause between them.

"Am I supposed to be colorblind?"

What?

"Colorblind?"

"Yeah."

Edward thought for a moment before he responded, "It may be temporary. We'll ask Carlisle when we see him next."

"Kay."

Bella shifted in his lap. Edward could see the blood still fresh between her breasts and neck. His control of the urge to reach out and lick it from her body was dwindling. He reached his hands to either side of her waist, sliding around and holding her secure. Bella's eyes looked at him in curiosity and confusion.

Edward pulled her body closer and leaned his lips toward her naval, darting his tongue out and reaching for the river of blood that extended up towards her neck.

Bella then did something that shocked him to his very core.

He felt hands on either side of his head, urging him closer as she arched her back into his touch without a sound. Once he had finally reached her neck he leaned to whisper into her ear.

"Bella."

"Will it hurt?" Her voice sounded frantic and afraid, but undeniably wanton.

"Only perhaps a little."

"I love you Edward."

"I love you too Bella."

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"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love, and be loved in return."

-Moulin Rouge!

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A/N: Another chapter. Whew. I can't say I like this chapter very much but I hope you do! So… packing for college is uber scary/frightening. I'm going through so much stuff and have SO much work to do. I'll try and update as often as possible but with 19 units my first semester, please be patient! Finest Wine is giving me such a headache because it was blocked or something on my computer because someone tried to hack into my account.

Also, to whoever COPIED AND PASTED 'Period' and posted it as there own, fooey on you! They made an account on livejournal and stole it. FOR SHAME. But some of my faithful reviewers cut them down. *high five* Justice is SWEET. I hope you feel icky inside for a day or two. *sticks tongue out at you*

ALSO. I posted a story I wrote WAY long ago. Called 'Out of Time'. If you like Draco/Hermione pairing with lots of drama and sexiness, go read.

I'll pray to the computer angels to let my upload 'FW' tomorrow or Saturday. *crosses fingers*

-behappy101

Please review! I need to know if anyone is still reading this!