BitterSweet:

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling therefore I do not own any of the Harry Potter Characters...

Severus Snape's Point of View:

I look at my timetable. Divination. Ugh. A class which is totally worthless. Professor Renwick is an old fool who utters superstitions to scare his witless pupils. Nonetheless, the sooner I enter the class the sooner I can leave. I walk up the divination tower, uttering silent hexes at every fool who shouts 'greasy git' in my direction. I just hope Lily won't find out.

Ah, Lily. Lily Evans. The only person who is sane besides me. My best friend. And the only one I could ever love. It feels as though my heart beats for only her. But it is useless, she only sees me as a friend. Love is impossible. Who could ever love a hooked-nosed, greasy-haired teenager who prefers to brew potions in his room compared to socializing? Not even me.

Finally I reach the top of the Divination tower and start climbing the stairs into the stuffy, nauseating room. "Look, it's Snivellus!" shouts Peter Pettigrew before he collapses due to my silent body binding curse.

Out of no where, the misty voice of Professor Renwick shouts: "I knew that was going to happen! I just didn't have the time to save Peter from fainting…"
I laugh a humourless laugh, for the sheer stupidity of others isn't something to take lightly, and sit on a chair at the back of the classroom, hidden by the shadows. With Renwick's voice fading into the background, I allow myself to fall asleep.

I wake up to realize I am alone in the room besides Professor Ridiculous. As I make to get up, Renwick starts gasping and spluttering, his eyes rolling back and forth. Unsure what to do I try to edge around the classroom, but the Professor suddenly turns to me. "Do not go down the path of your Slytherin friends" a foreign voice echoes out of him. "You will lose the only thing you hold dear if you do."

"What?" I ask dumbfounded. Stupid fool has been drinking too much like my foolish father.

"Severus Tobias Snape, you shut people out rather then let them in. I have seen you turn you back on Lily because you could not deal with the emotions. You join the Death-Eaters. You effectively kill her, and live a life of debt and remorse." Renwick replies, rasping. What is he saying?

"Legilimens!" I cast – and immediately I can see the vision Professor Baggins had been telling me. I am hanging upside down while Potter teases me. That's not new. Lily defends me, and I call her mudblood. She doesn't talk to me no matter how much I beg. She tells me she hates my friends and can't make excuses for me. I turn to my friends Avery and Mulciber, and join Voldemort. Lily marries James Potter, my worst enemy, and produces a son – Harry Potter. I tell Voldemort a prophecy. VOLDEMORT TAKES THE PROPHECY THE WRONG WAY. I run to Dumbledore for help, anything to save her. It can't be. No. I couldn't have killed her!

I try escaping this nightmare, but Renwick secures me in his head, willing me to see the vision in full.

In the next scene, Voldemort is standing over Lily.
"Severus was right; you're a pretty girl, Lily. You don't have to die, just hand me the boy." Voldemort says.

"Don't kill Harry! Kill me! Not Harry!" She cries, clutching a baby tightly to her chest.

"AVADA KEDAVRA!" She died. She died. She died. And it's my fault.

Breaking the connection, I run as fast as I can to get as far as possible from the world. I feel as though my heart has been ripped out of me. How could I ever betray – kill – the one I love? I see the shocked expression on peoples' faces at my expression – my guard has been let down and they can see what I feel. As I run down the dungeon stairs I hear the voice that normally brings me warmth, rising up the stairs, followed by the first yet last person I want to see. Frozen on the steps, I wish I could disappear. I close my eyes, and try to breathe normally, hoping that I would remain unnoticed.

"Hey Sev!" Lily says. I open my eyes to see her innocent emerald ones staring back at me. I watch her face change into one of worry and my suddenly emotions become too much, as the unbidden memory of her dead eyes float into the forefront of my mind. I feel tears running down my face and I push past her to run to my dormitory. I slam my door knowing it is loud enough for the whole castle to hear, but I don't care. I have not cried for years, yet I feel as though I could cry forever. My heart feels like it is in pain, but it isn't too painful. Bittersweet.

For what could be forever, I remain inside my bed, with the curtains drawn. I hear my fellow Slytherins enter and leave the dormitory numerous amounts of times, none of them coming to bother me, which I am grateful for.

Breaking me out of my reverie, I hear Mulciber ask: "Did you see those two Gryffindors today?"

"Yeah – Lily Evans and James Potter?" Avery replies. I feel a jolt of hatred flow through me at Potter's name.

"Ha-ha yeah. Lily sure gave James a whipping. You can tell she hates him."

After the last three words leave Mulciber's mouth, their voices drain out as I suddenly realize that the prophecy was just a mere warning: I haven't killed her. I haven't joined Voldemort. I haven't called her mudblood. She doesn't like James. She is still alive. There is still a chance.

But where to start? Lily always hated my friends, and I could never work out why. As if on cue, Avery opens my curtains, then turns to the rest of the occupants of the room.
"Oi, guys, I think Snape needs a little cheering up. Ready to take down a bunch of Hufflepuff first years? They're a pain in my arse just being here. How bout it? Snape? Malfoy? Mulciber?"

"As a prefect of Slytherin, it is my duty to torture mudbloods and blood traitors alike." Lucius Malfoy says mockingly.

"Ah, nothing more entertaining then performing a nice dose of levicorpus. Which reminds me, Snape, can you do my defence homework later? I can't be bothered." Mulciber says.

Ah. There it is. The streak I have either missed before or fervently ignored – most likely the latter. They have been using me, and it all makes sense now. They have used me for my knowledge about the Dark Arts and Potions. They are truly evil; I don't understand how I ever saw torturing people fun considering I am tortured by others a lot. I suppose I have been ignorant enough to ignore it all. But I will do whatever it takes not to be a monster like them, whatever it takes to have Lily.

Lucius turns to me with his eyebrow arched, expectantly.

"Can't, Defence exam in an hour. Got to study." I say hastily.

"C'mon, we all know you know more dark spells then probably the Dark Lord himself!" Avery comments, outraged. The thought of being compared to that heartless villain would have once been a compliment – had I not seen what would happen. The very thought now makes my stomach clench with fear.

"Probably, but I need to study." I sneer. As I walk out of the dungeons I hear Lucius' sly voice comment: "I think our little Slytherin Severus has opened his eyes and doesn't like the world we are going to force him to join."

"I'm Feelin' Better
Since I surrendered
You can't Climb
'Till you're ready to fall
You're not a land mine
You're not a gold mine
No you're not mine at all"
-Into the Dark, Ben Lee.

Please read and review! Let me know what you think! I tried to keep them as close to the characters as possible. Fluff will come, I'm trying to build the suspense...

(Later Author's Note: This is a re-edited version - I just patched up old mistakes. Embarrassed to see so many! Just wanted to say that the chapters start to get longer as I tried to keep around the 2000 word mark. I find it annoying when chapters are short, personally xx)