This is the same fic it always was; I just revamped it. There will be new scenes, but (probably) no new twists.

In case you didn't notice at first glance, I have changed my username to AutumnCaskette. This is so it will match my deviantart and my email. I have seperate devArt accounts for fanfics and for poetry/art. The poetry/art account is still NonplusGray.

Also, if you've checked my page recently, you know that all my fics have been deleted. Mentality's Hold, Darling Anathema, and Tactless will be reposted weekly. The other ones will not. Check my page for more information and my reasoning behind it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers, neither do I wish to because everything I own seems to die (i.e. my goldfish), and I figure Starscream dies enough on his own without my help.

Also, because there seem to be conflicting definitions of 'cycle', keep in mind that I use 'cycle' to mean 'day'.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

It wasn't that the blackness worried him; there was nothing threatening or ominous in its nature. His only sense of anxiety was born from the fact that there was nothing beyond the blackness, and the solitude was disconcerting. As far as he could tell, he was alone and eerily weightless.

Starscream sighed. He had been here before, many times, but mostly when he recharged. This time, well… last he remembered he had been flying. "If I crash I'm going to be supremely annoyed," he informed the void, darkly. The blackness answered with its usual silence. Starscream scoffed. "Yeah, I hate you too." He transformed into his mech form, crossed his arms petulantly, and waited.

The blackouts had been occurring since long before he had come to earth. Normally they let up within a few hours, but lately, and at very inopportune times (during battle for instance) they had nearly lasted an entire cycle. The Constructicons had attributed the instances to wounds sustained while fighting, possibly from a shortage of energon. Starscream seriously doubted it. He had been unconscious plenty of times before and certainly enough to tell the difference. In those times he had never been aware. It also didn't account for the times that he visited the void while he was in recharge mode. Then again, he had not notified the Constructicons of that little tidbit of information.

It wasn't as if he needed to give anyone any more reasons to label him insane.

"Why do they call you insane?"

Starscream straightened, optics widening slightly. That was new. He searched his memory banks, but it was unnecessary. He had never heard that voice before. A few moments passed in surprised silence before the seeker tried to speak. "Who are you?" he managed dubiously, feeling slightly foolish as he addressed the nothingness. The voice seemed to be coming from all around him, and it was impossible to pinpoint the owner's location. Not that it mattered, really. Starscream had yet to figure out how to move in any particular direction while in his present state.

"I do not wish to answer that question."

"Too bad. I want to know." Starscream's voice adopted its usual brand of terse arrogance, but he suspected that it was a charade easily seen through.

"I do not wish to answer that question."

The seeker laughed shakily. "Tiny bit redundant don't you think?" On the inside Starscream was beginning to panic. He really was hearing voices this time. "Listen…" he started, aiming for calm. "You're in my head, so why don't you just go back to the hellhole from whence you came?"

"I cannot leave. Why do they call you insane?"

"Well, you would be a perfect example." Starscream's body grew taut with frustration. "And what do you mean you can't leave?" he demanded, searching the blackness for a figure to focus on. "This is in my head. If I want you to leave, then I can make you leave!"

Seeking to rise to his own challenge, Starscream concentrated, focusing all of his will power on sending himself back to reality. He thought that he could feel some of the darkness lift…

"I am why they call you insane?" came the almost inquisitive response.

"Slag."

The seeker darkened his optics, and fought to redirect his thoughts. He would just ignore the voice until he regained consciousness.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"Screamer? Hey…. Screamer… Wake up!"

Starscream stirred groggily. "Skywarp?"

"About slagging time…"

Starscream shook his head, trying to clear his bleary sight. A distorted array of colors came into his field of vision, dominated by his wingmate's face. "Why do I feel like a mountain fell on me?"

"It didn't fall on you so much as… you kind of flew into it." Skywarp flashed a winning smile. "That was the most spectacular nosedive I've seen in ages."

"Don't make me shoot you," Starscream grumbled as he tried to stand and promptly fell. It was then that he wondered how long he had been in the blackness. He had left the base with Skywarp and Thundercracker just after sunrise, yet from the sun's position in the earth's sky the seeker judged it to be around noon. His temper flared when he realized his chronometer was still malfunctioning due to his time in the void.

"Phshh. Right now you couldn't even shoot yourself, let alone me." Skywarp's optics darted to the cloudless sky above them. "Thundercracker's on his way back to base to get the Constructicons. He didn't think that we should risk moving you so…" He shrugged in a way that would have been apologetic if he had been another mech.

"I can make it back by myself,"

The purple seeker tilted his head, considering him. "Uh… No, you can't."

Starscream glared, his optics brightening. There was a soft hum from his null rays.

"But then again, what do I know?" Skywarp amended, arms raised in a calming gesture.

Starscream rose to his feet unsteadily and transformed before his legs had a chance to fail him. The instantaneous rush of cold air drove away the last of the fog from his mind. He faintly registered Skywarp's presence behind him and sped up, gaining altitude. He detested appearing weak, even in front of one of his wingmates.

Opening a comlink, he sent a transmission to Thundercracker saying that they were heading back to base and there was no need to tell anyone what had happened. Starscream assured himself that he had imagined the dry chuckle in his mind.

Am I really insane? he wondered as he hurried to block out the soft laugh. A lot of things had happened in his lifetime, and there had been moments when he had been unbelievably close to breaking down, but now that he was presented with possible proof… It wasn't something that he wanted to think about. He had gotten so used to people selling out his ambition as madness that it came as a jolt to realize there might have been some truth in it. There was a nagging feeling in the back of his mind, however, that made him recognize he was not as surprised as he should have been.

"Hey, Screamer?" Skywarp pulled forward next to him. "What happened back there? I mean… you just fell."

"It's nothing to worry about. I'm fine now." He wasn't particularly sure why he wasn't telling Skywarp the truth, but it might have had something to do with the fact that secrets didn't stay secrets very long when Skywarp found out.

Skywarp transformed and blocked his path, arms crossed, optics narrowed. "Fine now? So you admit something was wrong before."

With an impatient growl, Starscream swerved around the mech and kept flying. "It was nothing, Skywarp."

Skywarp teleported back in front of his wingmate with tenacity befitting a sparkling. "Yeah, well, nothing almost got you killed."

"Ah, too bad. I'm sure that would have given Megatron a lovely excuse to throw a party."

"Come on, Screamer…" the teleport protested. "You know what happened, why won't you tell me?"

"I don't know what happened!" Starscream snapped, voice much harsher than he had intended. He forced his tone down a few decibels. "I just… blacked out, that's all."

Skywarp laughed humorlessly. "I'm shocked. I do believe that is this is the first time you have failed miserably at lying."

Starscream groaned, giving up on intimidation entirely. "Listen Skywarp, all I want to do is get back to base, recharge for a couple of hours−,"

"−and get drunk right?"

"Yes. Drunk would be nice."

Skywarp stared at the immobile jet for a few seconds, as if sizing him up, and then transformed back into his own jet mode. "Then let's get home, because I wholeheartedly agree with that proposal."

The rest off the journey was completed in relative silence.

The silence was relative because of the frequent but faint whispers that wove their way through Starscream's mind, so faint that he could still manage a strong state of denial.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Soundwave shuffled through the datapads, positive that Rumble had simply thrown the roster in the pile instead of turning it in like he said he had. I must remember to speak to him about this… he thought when he recognized the roster's standard orange screen. He reached toward it and froze.

A shimmer of foreign energyhad flicked warily across his telepathy. The communications officer turned back towards the hall, perturbed.

A little ways down he saw a group of seekers turn the corner in the opposite direction from him. There were no other mechs in the area, so it was likely that the signal had come from one of them. He sent out a tendril of his telepathy towards the group. Maybe if he could sense their thoughts…

"Get out."

Soundwave raised his hand to his head in shock. That voice didn't belong to any of the cassettes, and the seekers shouldn't have been able to speak to him using that method; they shouldn't have even realized he was reading them.

"Get out!"

It was a few seconds before his systems warned him of the approaching onslaught of energy. He pulled back his network from the group, but not before a portion of the force hit him. Soundwave crumpled. There is something…wrong… with one of the seekers, he thought weakly.His optics dimmed, and brightened, and dimmed again before he succumbed to unconsciousness.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Starscream sat up with a jolt. "What the slag? Where am I?" The sudden sensation of reality nearly caused him to lose his balance, and his hands shot out to catch himself on the bar. The air commander surveyed the scene around him skeptically. He seemed to be doing this a lot lately.

Skywarp slapped him on the back, oblivious to his wingmate's precarious position on his stool. "You're in the mess hall, remarkably with energon cube still in hand." Grinning he raised his own cube in a mock toast.

Starscream looked at Skywarp squarely, confused and none too happy about it. "Why?" he managed dryly.

"You… uh… blacked out again." Skywarp put a grudging accent on the words, clearly still bitter that Starscream was concealing something from him.

Starscream looked down at his energon cube, optics narrowed. He didn't remember anything. He searched his mind, trying to focus on every minute detail. He could recall the flight back to base, signing the datapad saying that he had returned without incident, and traversing the halls on the way to his present location. He vaguely remembered sitting down and Skywarp handing him an energon cube, but that was all. His cube had been full, and now it was half-empty; there had been a time lapse. "How much did I drink?" he asked carefully.

The other seeker shook his head. "Not enough to knock you out, if that's what you're thinking."

He thought hard, but he couldn't remember being in the blackness. If he hadn't been in the void, what had happened?

"How long was I out?"

"Couldn't have been more than a few minutes, but Screamer… you were out. I had to half carry you to a seat. It was very awkward, mind you, and I seriously considered making you pay for it." A pout crossed the teleport's features. "Many pranks went through my mind, but none of them seemed good enough." He mimed looking crestfallen.

"Oy!"

A flurry of footsteps became audible from the corridor outside the mess hall. Starscream and Skywarp turned to look behind them towards the entrance of the room, as did a wide majority of the other occupants (minus those who had drunk themselves into indifference). Ramjet was standing on the threshold. He looked mildly irritated.

The flier paused, hand on the doorframe. "Has anyone seen any of the Constructicons?"

Hook and Scrapper stood up from a table in the corner of the room. They too looked mildly irritated, but they always did.

"What's wrong?" Hook asked without interest.

"I, uh, just found Soundwave unconscious in one of the hallways." He shrugged. "Thought you guys might want to know."

Starscream shuddered. A laugh resonated in his mind, so loud he wondered why no one else reacted. "Stop…" He clutched at his head.

"Starscream?" Skywarp reached out to him tentatively.

The seeker fell sideways and hit the floor.

"Starscream!"

He felt Skywarp kneel beside him and could see through blurred optics that the rest of the room had turned their attention from Ramjet to him. A shudder ran through the fallen seeker's body. His optics flashed strangely and slowly turned to focus on the teleport, looking at once sickly and detached. "I marvel at your concern," the voice whispered despairingly. This time however, the words had come from Starscream's mouth, and he could tell by the look on everyone's face that he wasn't the only one that heard it.