Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight characters or the Twilight ideas, those are owned by Stephenie Meyer and Little, Brown and Summit and probably numerous other people. I also don't own the quotes and song lyrics at the beginning of each chapter; credit is given to them. (Credit is given to the singer for lyrics and not the songwriter, sorry.) I also don't own any of the pop culture references, just the creativity I have to come up with them.

Warning: This is not a fast story. Jake and Bella will not live happily ever after at chapter four. You don't get over the 'love of your life' leaving you in four chapters. If you do than they weren't the love of your life. I never planned for this to be a fluffy, mushy story. I planned for this to be a realistic story. Even under the best break up circumstances you don't recover with the snap of your fingers. If you want fluff and mush turn around now. That's right, if you can't deal with angst, pain and realism I'm telling you not to read my story. If you want a story with a touch of realism to it (the best I can give, I've never gone through a break-up) than please continue reading.

AN: So, here's my new fic. It's Jake/Bella. If you're offended… still read it. c: It's not meant to be OOC, I got flak for one of my Jake/Bella fics because the reviewer said Bella would never choose Jake… however, I believe that if Alice had never shown up Eclipse would have been a VERY different book.

I will be playing around with POVs because I enjoyed it so much with Innocence Lost. I don't think I will be so OCD about who's POV the chapter is in (yeah, the pattern of POVs on IL was on purpose.)

This takes place mid New Moon before Jake visits Bella in her room but after the movies. The first paragraph is paraphrased from Meyer's.

Headstrong, crazy days.

When your mind's made up and the music plays.

Headstrong, can you feel the beat?

Melt down, can you feel the heat?

ASHLEY TISDALE, HEADSTRONG

SATURDAY, MARCH 10

Cupid's Chokehold; Chapter One. Bella.

My foot tapped a staccato beat on the floor. I wished that I had brought something to do while waiting for Jake to come by, of course I hadn't known he would be off with his new friends. Although, he was probably with his new friends all the time. My fingers joined the beat on the steering wheel and I looked around the inside of my truck, desperately searching for something to do.

I found an old Calc test and flipped through it, finding the one problem I had gotten wrong, bringing my grade from 100 to 98. I dug a pencil out from under my seat and began to rework the problem, finding exactly where I had gone wrong.

I jumped and broke the pencil when I heard the handle of the truck being pulled, I turned and saw a desperate Jacob outside my window. I quickly unlocked and opened the door and lifted my arms as I got ready to let all my rage out on him.

Instead of yelling back at me or stopping my arms from hitting him he wrapped me in his own arms and lifted me out of the car and off the ground. I relaxed instantly. I was back in the warm arms of my Jacob, this was the Jacob I knew.

He rocked me back and forth my feet swung around, he whispered words of forgiveness in my ear, ran his fingers through my hair, pulled back to look at my face. It was the third time he looked down at me that I snapped out of my fantasy of having normal Jacob back with me.

"What the hell Jacob?" I screeched. I drew back my hands again ready to hit him but he took them in his and held them to his chest.

"Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" he brushed back my hair and I turned my head away.

"I'm fine," I answered shaking my head away from his hand. The anger bubbled up inside of me again, "Of course you hurt me-"

He pulled me back in a hug, gentler this time, "I'm sorry. I'm still learning control-"

"Control?! What does that have to do with leaving me? You wouldn't return my calls, you wouldn't talk to me. How did you think I was going to feel?"

"I'm sorry! I didn't know it was going to be like this."

"Oh! You thought I was going to be fine with you ignoring be after you professed your undying—devotion to me," I pulled away from him and leaned against the car. I noticed for the first time that his gang of new friends was there, watching the entire thing. Everyone except for the leader, Sam, looked angry and upset. But, Sam seemed to understand what was going on.

"Bells, I never meant to hurt you. You don't know all of it, you couldn't understand."

"Well, duh," I dragged it out, feeling thirteen again, "it's a little hard to understand something if you don't explain it. I mean," I let out a short, hurried breath, "honestly."

I pulled on the tips of my hair, waiting for him to speak. I suddenly felt very awkward and vulnerable with Jake's new friends around us. I hadn't meant to have this conversation with him in front of anyone else.

"Jake can we please talk alone?" despite being angry at Jake and insulted by the way he was acting now I couldn't help but want to try and fix everything with him. Even with the arguing I felt a little more complete around him. Jacob was the only person I had left around me that made me feel whole.

His hand rested on the side of my shoulders, and with so much anger in the area the close and intimate contact felt awkward, "Please?" I begged. Jake turned towards Sam and I caught his jaw in my hand, bringing his gaze back to mine, getting ready to yell at him for his newfound dependence on Sam. But the look in his eyes, stopped me. He looked so torn and pained, tormented. It made a clump grow in my throat and my eyes water. I attempted to swallow the cotton ball exploding in my throat, "When- when did you become so reliant on him? I thought you didn't like this gang thing…"

"Things change, Bells. Lots of things change."

"No shit," I said under my breath.

Jake laughed and held me close again, "I've missed you so much. You can't believe how glad I am right now."

I shook my head; I was so confused. I was certain he couldn't have heard what I had said. But how on Earth could he be glad? How had things worked out? I pushed against his chest to no avail, "We really need to talk, Jake. I can't just ignore what happen. You hurt me."

He gathered my hands in his and whispered his pleas into them, "I didn't mean to. I didn't want to. But there were- things… people, stopping me. Trust me, if I had known this was going to happen I would have never left you like that. Please don't be angry at me," my heart ached for him, he was in obvious pain from this, his eyes were watering, his entire body was shaking.

But he had left me. All for some stupid gang.

"Jacob, you need to calm down," Sam said. It sounded like an order.

I pulled away from Jake again and walked over to Sam, "Jake's right, I shouldn't be mad at him. I should be mad at you," I yelled at him, feeling shorter than ever, "What gives you the right to ruin other people's life?"

Sam looked down at me pitifully, "You wouldn't understand," he said simply.

I rolled my eyes and walked away from him, standing in the center of the group I ran my fingers through my hair, "If you two both think there is something I don't understand, then please explain it!" I turned to Jake, who was shaking against the car, "Please, Jake."

He looked at Sam for confirmation, I placed my hand on his cheek and pushed his eye line back to my own. I opened my mouth, getting ready to ask him once again why he was so dependent so suddenly, but he took my hand off of his cheek and shook his head, "A lot of things have changed, Bells."

"Things between us," I said simply.

"No!" he shook his head again quickly. I tilted my head to the side and raised my eyebrow, "Well, yes. But, it doesn't have to be like this anymore. I'm certain. Just let us talk to you, please."

He was willing to talk, that was something. But I wanted to talk to him alone, not with his new friends, "Can't we talk alone?"

"Not right now."

"Jake! You say you want me to understand, but you won't explain any of it to me."

"I'm not well, I can't. Not right now," he pushed strands of my hair behind my ears and kept his warm hands cupped under my jaw. He was too warm.

"Are you sick, Jake? I'll take you to the hospital. Everything will be fine," if Jake was sick I would do anything I could to make him better. Despite his dramatic attempt to ditch me I still needed him, he was the last thing on this earth that kept me sane. I couldn't lose that. I wouldn't let Jake leave me; I couldn't disappoint Charlie.

"No, I'm not sick," he said, I hadn't realized how tall he had gotten. It had only been a matter of days since I saw him last but already he had grown another few inches.

"But you're so warm," I brushed my fingers over his burning cheek.

"Yeah, that's part of what I need to tell you. It's a long story," his eyes were scanning my face, looking at my like he had been away at sea for years. As if he was trying to memorize my face, like he was scared he was never going to see me again after we talked.

"Everyone's been saying that but no one will tell me it."

AN: Originally I wanted to post this when it was complete. I do have 15 chapters done, but that just means I have about 15-20 to go. However, I realized that soon Breaking Dawn would be out and I'm not sure how wild people will be about an AU Jake/Bella fic set mid-New Moon once the entire series is complete. It might be too hard to ignore what happened in the last two books.

Read: If you review I'll send you the chapter quote opener thing in the reply. The quotes always have something to do with the chapter, whether it's a major thing or minor you'll have to find out later.

Also: Sorry to those on my alert, this document was being irritating and I'm working between two computers which is increasingly irritating.