The Final Chapter, which actually has been done for a long time, but I've been too lazy to upload it. It's an ending, but whether it's good or not, I don't know. I'm actually thinking it isn't, but if you consider Chapter Twelve to be the real final chapter and this one to be an Epilogue, then it works out fine. Of course one could argue that the entire story has been an extended Epilogue for "A Twisted Timeline"

Also be sure to stick around at the end for the not so special alternative ending. And then, perhaps I'll get off my lazy ass and finish the Eleventh Chapter of Two Paths, One Destiny. I've been working on the Heir of the Warrior Trilogy so much, it's kind of slipped though the cracks.

And now, onto your feature presentation.

Chapter Thirteen: The Death of Harry Potter?

Several Ministry officials, other distinguished members of the Wizarding community, and more than a few members of the mafia world stood around a coffin, where the body of Harry Potter laid. An important looking man in black dress robes walked up to the magical microphone and looked forward, before he cleared his throat.

"Today, we come to honor a great wizard, a great man, and a true hero, Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived," stated the Ministry official. "Most of us would break down living one day in his life, he had bravely fought the Dark Lord known as Voldemort, helped reveal the diabolic corruptions of Albus Dumbledore, and saved the Ministry of Magic from a terrible fate, under a corrupt leader. Garrett Winston and Rufus Scrimgeour were part of a grand conspiracy to bring Harry Potter down. Many of us in the Ministry were too scared to do anything, yet we knew, we knew that Harry Potter would save us, but we had to hate him, to protect our families from these diabolic forces of evil."

Several of the Ministry leaders were sobbing in the crowd. In the crowd, Luna, Lotus, and Hermione all sat, balling up their fists, wanting to curse them.

"Yet, despite all the hatred, Harry Potter was a true trend setter, a hero he fought even with his back was against the wall, he was a true hero, an icon, he unraveled the corruptions to be pave way to a better future," stated the Ministry official. "Despite the fact that he will not be alive to see these changes, we must move forward, to prove to the fact that nothing like Garrett Winston ever happens again. Winston, currently entombed in Azkaban, will be a reminder for all that we must shun foreign influences and move forward with the resources we have at our disposal. Sadly, one of these resources will not be Harry Potter. Today, under the spirit of the great Merlin, we honor the life and times of one Harry Potter and may he enjoy life on the other side of the veil."

"And now, one of Harry's oldest friends Hermione Granger wishes to say a few words," said another Ministry official, as Hermione marched up to the podium. Several were taken aback with the fire in her eyes, as she made her way up to the podium, slowly turning to the group.

"I apologize to Harry for making his funeral into a spectacle," said Hermione, as she wiped a tear away from her face. "But the fact is, all of you Ministry officials are sitting here, saying you are honoring the life of Harry Potter. That's rich, for reasons that you can't even comprehend. The word honor, it means integrity, which is something that none of you from the Ministry of Magic have."

The Ministry officials gasped, but Hermione was far from finished.

"You people are sitting here, talking about how you knew that Harry was a hero, making up some flimsy excuses about how you were forced to hate him, well, after all the sacrifices Harry made for you, HOW DARE YOU MAKE EXCUSES!" snapped Hermione loudly, causing a small burst of magical energy to shake the ground. "In your positions, Harry would have found a way to neutralize the threat and in fact he did. Harry went through hell and back over the last few days, while you sit at your desks and do nothing. To think that each and every one of you are our hopes in running the country, is fucking ludicrous! You make yourselves look better, by showing remorse, but in fact, the only reason you're sad because Harry's death means that you lost your scapegoats."

"Thank you for that…" stated the Ministry official but Hermione shook her head. The Ministry officials moved forward and held their wands, but the mobsters pointed their guns. Despite the fact they had wands, the Ministry officials were afraid. Most of the bolder individuals that would have fought back had been slaughtered in the destruction of the Ministry of Magic.

"I'm not finished yet, hell I'm far from finished, so you jackals can just sit there and listen to what I have to say," said Hermione. "To see all of you here, faking remorse, is spitting on Harry's memory and all he's done in his life. You two faced bastards would shove your own mothers down a flight of stairs, if it would have gotten you a promotion or better standing in the Ministry of Magic. As far as I'm concerned, the Ministry of Magic would be better off sinking into the ground and bursting into flames, with all of you inside. In fact, this is I think of the Ministry of Magic and the entire Wizarding World in fact!"

Hermione held up her wand, moving it around for all to see before she snapped the wand for all to see and she angrily threw it to the ground. The Ministry gasped, normally having one's wand snapped was the ultimate insult, but Granger had done it as an act of anger directed towards the Ministry.

"Now Harry, sorry you had to see that and I hope in the next world, you're much happier," said Hermione, as she could barely hold back tears, as she walked off. "At least you won't have to deal with the Ministry of Magic ever again."

The mobsters, along with Luna, Lotus, Sirius, and Remus all bowed their heads as Hermione walked off the stage.

"And the Ministry officials should clear out right now, they don't deserve to be here, they don't show Harry no respect," said one of the mobsters with a grunt.

"What's going to make us?" asked one of the Ministry officials and he was promptly battered by a barrage of gunfire. Blood splattered everywhere as the Ministry official dropped to the ground, laying in a pool of his blood, shuddering.

"That will do," said the mobster as the Ministry officials promptly scattered from the nearest exit. "Now, Boss Barone, you were a hell of a man, rest in peace and I'm sure you'll takeover wherever the afterlife leads you."

The mobsters cheered as they raised their guns before they shot several rounds into the air, before they all concluded the funeral without the Ministry. Harry Potter, Boss Barone, the Boy-Who-Lived, whoever it was, was no more.

Back at Number Twelve Grimmauld Place, Lotus was curled up in Luna's lap, as Hermione, Sirius, and Remus sat at the edge of the table, drinking Firewhiskey.

"I can't believe he's gone," muttered Lotus, as Luna massaged her neck, trying to comfort her, but it was really just to give her something to do to take her mind off of the fact that Harry was gone.

"I know, I know," said Luna in a saddened voice, as she would give anything for Harry to walk through that door. "It ended the way he might have wanted to, had he given it any thought. He saved the world from Grindelwald."

"I know, so valiant, but I didn't want it to end at all," said Lotus in between sobs.

"Still, we have to move on," offered Sirius after a few moments pause. "Harry might be gone, but we have to honor his memory by proving that life goes on."

"Yeah, that's what Harry would have wanted," commented Hermione.

"What is it I would have wanted, Hermione?" asked a voice, and everyone spun around, Lotus nearly fell to the ground in shock, as Harry stood in the door, with a smile on his face. The group looked at him, as if they could not believe what they were seeing. No one seemed to be able to speak. Harry stood there, with a smirk for another minute before he decided to break the silence "What, you all look like you've seen a ghost or something?"

"Harry!" yelled Luna and Lotus in an excited voice, as they launched themselves at Harry, taking turns kissing them madly. Sirius, Remus, and Hermione sat at the table, as Harry slowly moved over towards the chair, sitting down, with Luna and Lotus on either side, a head on each shoulder, as they looked relieved.

"Harry, we thought you were dead!" shouted Sirius in a surprised voice.

"Well, that was kind of the idea, I wanted everyone to think that, otherwise the emotion at the funeral would not have been genuine," responded Harry. "Good job in ripping into the Ministry by the way Hermione, you summed up anything that I would say had I been able to."

"Wait a minute, how did you know what I said?" asked Hermione.

"You were there underneath the cloak the entire time, weren't you?" asked Remus.

"Yes, Remus, I was, five points to Gryffindor," said Harry. "Now, I'm sure if you think about it, it's obvious where I had found such a close body double. It had been something that I looked for, but I decided to take everything one step further than clear my name completely. I faked my death, that way the Ministry will never bother me again."

"The clone, of course," responded Luna in a knowing voice. "It was right there when the place was going around over our heads and it would have been easy to make the switch."

"They did say there was broken glass there," offered Lotus, before she looked at Harry, grinning. "Harry, you magnificent bastard, you faked your own death and fooled the entire Ministry."

"It wasn't that big of an accomplishment," said Harry modestly. "I could have killed a hobo and put glamour charms on him and they would have bought it was me. Now, I'm sure you saw the Daily Prophet."

"Yes, what about it?" asked Hermione.

"My obituary, I wrote it, it was my finest piece of work," responded Harry. "Other than the final fuck off I left to the Ministry of Magic."

"Wait a minute, what final fuck off you left to the Ministry of Magic?" asked Lotus in a confused voice. "What did you do, Harry?"

"Time will tell, it should be happening by now, those two faced bastards deserve it after they did to me, to us," answered Harry before he sighed, as he looked at Luna and Lotus. "I'd love to make up for lost time with both of you, but I have to inform whatever's left of my organization that I'm not dead. The last thing I need is a turf war over my empire. Then the real fun begins."

"What do you have in mind?" asked Luna.

"Whatever it is, I'm sure we'll have fun," said Lotus.

"Well, I was thinking about buying a small country and kicking everyone out, so we can have it all to ourselves, you know, to get away from everything," said Harry and Lotus and Luna just responded by hugging Harry. He found his position great, in between two beautiful girls.

"Great idea Harry," said Lotus, as she kissed him.

"I just have a feeling this begins a new chapter of our lives and the adventure will continue," added Luna, as she also kissed Harry. The three walked off, for some three way fun.

Harry Potter (1980-1999):

A hero and valiant savior to all, Harry Potter, was sadly found dead at the evil fortress known to some as Ministry of Magic. Harry, fought the good fight, even though anyone else rarely did. The last survivor of the Potter family, Harry vaporized Voldemort as a baby, most likely because the Dark Lord took away his teddy bear. That kind of petty crime is all that Voldemort is good for after all. Later on, Harry spent his life fighting for truth, justice, and the American Way, despite the fact that he was not American. He was faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and could leap tall buildings in a single bound. Of course, we at the Daily Prophet could be confusing Harry with someone else. No matter what it was, today, Harry Potter has gone beyond the beyond but his everlasting spirit blesses us today. No matter what, The Ministry of Magic will never forget the name of Harry Potter. Always remember the Boy-Who-Lived and he's always watching, even in death. You can't escape justice from what you've put him though. Remember Harry Potter is always watching. Always.

In the Ministry of Magic, several sheep moved through the Ministry.

"Bah!" cried the sheep in a loud voice, as they moved through the Ministry. On the wall of the Ministry, the following message was written.

Gotcha,

Love From,

Harry Potter.

The End.

And now, because absolutely no one demanded it, the not so special alternate ending to the Grand Conspiracy

Severus Snape's eyes snapped up, as he was leaned over a Potion, a slight headache and feeling light headed.

"Severus, might I ask what the matter is?" asked Dumbledore, as he was concerned, Severus had been cooped up in his office for the entire weekend.

"Dumbledore, I just had the most horrible dream," said Snape. "Harry Potter was a mob boss at the age of six, he ruined your life, my life, lot more things happened that bad no sense, Potter's younger self returned out of nowhere, despite doing absolutely nothing before then. Then the dream had an inexplicable sequel. Gridelwald returned, with a plan that made no sense and an uber amulet. Not to mention he had sexual relations with his female counterpart and he turned the entire Ministry of Magic into sheep. Then I woke up."

"Now, Severus, what did I tell you about inhaling potions fumes?" asked Dumbledore, shaking his head although he was rather amused about the thought of little Harry turning everyone in the Ministry of Magic into sheep. "This is just about as bad as the dream you had when Harry named his second born child Albus Severus Potter."

"Don't remind me," said Snape dryly as he remembered the hours spent in therapy over that one. Grudgingly Snape also tried to remind himself that Harry Potter was still six years old and it would be five years before he would have to deal with the brat.

At that moment, Professor McGonagall rushed into the office, looking rather frantic.

"Professor Dumbledore, Arabella Figg flooed us, Harry has ran away from the Dursleys, he was acting all strange, and then some shady looking men in a limousine picked him up," said McGonagall.

This prompted Snape to do the only thing that made sense. He shrieked like a little girl.

The End(Part II)