"Next time you're feeling chivalrous, leave me out of it," she complained as she heard him fumble around in the water on the other side of the large fern.

Balthier sent a bit of water splashing over the thick plant in reply. "Next time I'm feeling chivalrous, I'll have myself examined by a physician!"

Ashe grumbled under her breath, still not feeling the slightest bit clean despite being neck-deep in the stream. A day's march across the Tchita Uplands had left the entire party sore and testy, but the torrential downpour that had characterized the last two hours of their journey had been especially trying.

Balthier, seeing a snake poised to strike her, had launched himself at her, knocking her down into a giant mud puddle. The both of them were dirtied from head to toe while the snake ended up changing targets from Ashe to Vaan anyhow. The young man was having his wounds tended to by Penelo and Fran while Ashe had excused herself to a quiet creek in a rare tree-filled part of the Uplands. The rains had finally let up, allowing her to wash the offensive mud from her person to her satisfaction.

Her would-be rescuer bathed on the other side of the leafy plant, his splashes and complaints not making her feel much better. Basch had been rather annoyed by the whole predicament - that Balthier had dared to knock her to the ground, and additionally, that he had failed in his duty to protect her. Ashe could tell by the look in her knight's eyes that he believed he should have been the one to shove her out of harm's way. In Ashe's opinion, she could protect herself just fine - and she didn't have to be tackled in the process.

"These stains are never coming out!" she heard Balthier whine, and she moved to float on her back. She let the water flow past her ears, drowning out her companion's complaining. The man was obsessed with cleanliness. He'd been sighing and moaning all day because of the rain, and then the mud bath he'd given himself had been the last straw. But she didn't see what right he had to be upset - he'd been the one to tackle her, and she'd borne the brunt of it. A little convenient, him landing right atop her as they fell. Protecting her, he'd claimed...at least until Basch had run over with murderous intent in his eyes. Balthier had been quick to get off of her then.

Ashe lamented and accepted the loss of her clothes. They'd reach Archades sooner or later, and she'd be able to get some new clothes there. She had enough in her pack to last, but her current outfit was not going to be saved. Balthier had plowed into her back, knocking her face first into the muck. Her blouse had been torn, and she'd gotten mud in places she didn't want to spend much time thinking about.

A splash far closer to her startled her from her float, and then she felt a hand on her leg. Ashe immediately began flailing, submerging in her shock. She could hear laughing as she poked her head up once more, clutching her arms around her body. "What are you doing over here? Get away from me!" she screamed as a very unclothed Balthier treaded water calmly beside her.

Of course, she couldn't exactly swim away from him without giving him a glimpse of forbidden flesh. He sighed. "I'm not here for peeping. I was wondering if you brought soap?"

"And you had to come over here and put your hand on me to ask?"

He scowled at her. "I did ask you, and you said nothing!" Must have been when her ears were beneath the water, she guessed. But either way, he had no right.

"Go back behind the fern!"

"Do. You. Have. Soap?"

"No!" she screamed, beginning to shake at his insolence. Ashe had been living amongst common folk for some time now, but nobody but her husband was allowed to see the Princess of Dalmasca in the nude. Her husband was no longer among the living - and Balthier was the furthest from a husband she could possibly imagine.

But even with her answer, Balthier didn't move, and she covered her chest even more tightly. "No soap? But my hair!"

Of all the stupid things, she thought angrily. "Why didn't you bring your own soap?"

"Well excuse me, Your Royal Nakedness, but I was so distraught about the state of my own clothes that I..."

"What did you just call me?" she spat, incensed with his sickening preoccupation with his clothes and his propensity to treat her position with such flippant disregard.

He stilled, offering her a rather lovely view of firm, toned arms and broad shoulders. Had he always been hiding this athletic physique under his stuffy clothes? There was still a splotch of mud beneath his left eye, almost resembling war paint from some ancient tribal ritual. She didn't even notice she was gaping at his nude torso.

Balthier spun this distraction to his advantage. "Never seen a man bathe before?"

She turned away, letting him get an eyeful of her bared back if he so desired. Typical self-centered, lascivious pirate. He liked the attention! "I've no soap, so there's no excuse for you to continue disrupting me. You got us both into this messy predicament, and I'd appreciate the opportunity to get clean."

But he dared to move closer, the water rippling around them. She could feel him behind her, and weeks of traveling together had probably brought this all on. Perhaps it had all been a set-up. Maybe that snake had meant to attack Vaan the whole time, and he'd tackled her knowing they'd both need a bath after. Was he really that interested in her?

"You missed something," she heard him mumble behind her. Ashe was stunned into silence when she felt a firm hand on one shoulder, then a handful of water against her neck. There must have been mud caked on there, and she felt Balthier's fingers rubbing the filth away. "There."

But the sensation had stirred something long hidden within her. Her frustration toward him and his usual horrible behavior seemed meaningless as he stood in the water behind her, his hand still poised on her shoulder with the other resting against the base of her neck. "Is there any left?" she asked innocently, letting him decide where it would lead. She didn't really need an entanglement with Balthier, but stranger things had happened in her life.

He'd been the one to shove her in the mud. Not exactly subtle. She recalled the boys in the chocobo stable tugging her plaits when she was younger - her nanny had said such teasing meant they liked her. Even at his age, Balthier seemed to be playing the same game with her. And considering his almost reverential love for his various adornments and outfits, he must really like her if he'd sacrificed one of his beloved shirts to get this close to her without the others being able to interfere.

"Yes," he said quietly beside her ear. "Still some right here." He traced his fingers down her spine where she knew there was no mud. She'd been submerged in the water for minutes before he'd arrived, and she was probably cleaner than he. The feeling of his fingers on her back sent shudders through her. She dare not let it go further than this.

"Balthier, I'm..."

His lips against her neck then made her gasp, and she almost uncrossed her arms from her chest at his movement. But as soon as she'd felt it, he was gone. Noisy splashes indicated his departure.

She heard him on the other side of the fern seconds later. "Can't even bring some soap. Despicable disregard, Princess." His joking tone had returned like nothing had happened, and she was confused. But moments later, she had her answer.

"We've made camp, Majesty. There's a hill just to the east with ruins, room enough for us all."

Basch's calm, deep voice announced his arrival, and she smiled as he crept through the brush at the edge of the river. He had his hand firmly planted over his face, and he stumbled in the reeds to avoid looking upon her.

"Thank you, Basch. I'll be there shortly."

"Pirate," Basch said coldly, addressing Balthier on the other side of the ferns. "You will apologize to Her Majesty for your rudeness."

Balthier's voice was anything but apologetic. "Oh, of course. Terribly sorry. Next time, I'll be sure to let the mean, nasty animals do what they wish to Her Majesty."

"That's not what I..."

Ashe sighed. "Enough, both of you."

Balthier chuckled, and Basch merely turned around and stalked back through the tall grasses. She waited until he was out of sight before moving back to the shore. Ashe could hear Balthier grumbling about his clothes once more, whatever moment they'd shared either forgotten or postponed until they got another moment alone.

She put on a fresh set of clothes and returned to camp, rubbing the back of her neck with a grin.