Disclaimer: Mystery Science Theater 3000 belongs to Best Brains, Gizmonics Institute to Joel Hodgson, and "Love Don't Roam" to the BBC.

--

As sung by Joel Robinson To the tune of "Love Don't Roam" by Murray Gold

Well I've lived upon this Earth

Oh, ever since my life began

Just an ordinary Joel

At cleaning I am a dab hand

But you, Forrester and Erhardt

You have hatched an evil plan

Oh, Gizmonics Inst. will fire you

If you launch me, understand?

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

No, no

/modulate\

I am happy enough living

Down on this Terrestrial sphere

It is true, it has got its problems

But it's home, is this all clear?

And you have got no business

Making me to vanish, sooth?

Oh, Gizmonics Inst. will fire you

Believe me; it's the truth

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

No, no

/modulate\

Well, I love the cinematic art

As much as the next man

And I loved tales of space travel

In my youth (you understand)

But to make me sit through all the worst

Films ever made at all

In a station cut off from the world!

For that I will not stand.

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

No! List to me, my bosses two

Please listen to my plea

I belong down here a-cleaning stuff

Not out in space, you see

No! List to me, my bosses two

Please listen to my plea

I belong down here a-cleaning stuff

Not up there out in space, you see, you see, see?

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

Don't launch me,

Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above /commence fadeout\

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love

Don't launch me, Clayton son of Pearl

Into the skies above

For to sit through lousy movies

On the Satellite of Love